Geek Jokes Volume 0b10
Discussion
Oliver Stone's 1986 film Platoon was marketed with the tag line “The first casualty of war is innocence”
I would say that in Software Development, when deadlines loom and time needs to be saved, the first casualty is testing. Or possibly documentation. Or both.
Anyway, Software Developers don't like releasing untested software; it is forced upon us by Management. Indeed, we usually take pains to make Management aware of the fact that this will come back to bite but it always falls on deaf ears.
The phrase "'Throw it over the wall' development" and "It builds, ship it" are ironic memes.
I would say that in Software Development, when deadlines loom and time needs to be saved, the first casualty is testing. Or possibly documentation. Or both.
Anyway, Software Developers don't like releasing untested software; it is forced upon us by Management. Indeed, we usually take pains to make Management aware of the fact that this will come back to bite but it always falls on deaf ears.
The phrase "'Throw it over the wall' development" and "It builds, ship it" are ironic memes.
Sporky said:
BrokenSkunk said:
Wait, what? Software gets tested?
Yes, on the 32nd of Februarx at 35:72 and - 4 seconds.Walks into a bar
Runs into a bar.
Crawls into a bar.
Dances into a bar.
Flies into a bar.
Jumps into a bar.
And orders:
a beer.
2 beers.
0 beers.
99999999 beers.
a lizard in a beer glass.
-1 beer.
"qwertyuiop" beers.
Testing complete.
A real customer walks into the bar and asks where the bathroom is.
The bar goes up in flames.
I heard a story about a telephone system that did call forwarding. A user note was sent out not to create loops when call forwarding (A direct to B directs to C directs to A) with more than a certain number of numbers involved.
Cue a massive number of service calls to reset the systems when users had wondered what would happen if you did.
Sometime users are better left informed.
Cue a massive number of service calls to reset the systems when users had wondered what would happen if you did.
Sometime users are better left informed.
Starfighter said:
I heard a story about a telephone system that did call forwarding. A user note was sent out not to create loops when call forwarding (A direct to B directs to C directs to A) with more than a certain number of numbers involved.
Cue a massive number of service calls to reset the systems when users had wondered what would happen if you did.
Sometime users are better left informed.
Reminds me of a report ( might have been in Virginia) about 25 years ago. A customer could not get his card to work on an ATM on a Friday night. He called customer service and got into an infinite loop of "press 7 for this, press 8 for that" and "press zero" never got him to a live person.Cue a massive number of service calls to reset the systems when users had wondered what would happen if you did.
Sometime users are better left informed.
The guy designed autodialers for a living.
Come Monday the bank was jammed with thousands of auto calls that said "this is an automated complaint service - press 1 to hear the complaint, press 2 for........" and of course they could not get to a live person.
BrokenSkunk said:
For the avoidance of doubt, as a hardware developer with 30 years experience of providing the stuff that the software runs on (yes really: custom RTOS) I knew damn well I was lighting the touch paper there.
Whilst the hardware has to work, the typists can just issue a patch.
Mind you, I've worked with custom hardware that has had a heron's nest of extra wires soldered onto the back, which constitute fixes and workarounds, and have thought to myself "I bet that's what software looks like if you could see it" Whilst the hardware has to work, the typists can just issue a patch.
(Obviously all those extra wires get incorporated into the design for when the next version of the PCB is made)
Clockwork Cupcake said:
BrokenSkunk said:
For the avoidance of doubt, as a hardware developer with 30 years experience of providing the stuff that the software runs on (yes really: custom RTOS) I knew damn well I was lighting the touch paper there.
Whilst the hardware has to work, the typists can just issue a patch.
Mind you, I've worked with custom hardware that has had a heron's nest of extra wires soldered onto the back, which constitute fixes and workarounds, and have thought to myself "I bet that's what software looks like if you could see it" Whilst the hardware has to work, the typists can just issue a patch.
(Obviously all those extra wires get incorporated into the design for when the next version of the PCB is made)
Clockwork Cupcake said:
BrokenSkunk said:
For the avoidance of doubt, as a hardware developer with 30 years experience of providing the stuff that the software runs on (yes really: custom RTOS) I knew damn well I was lighting the touch paper there.
Whilst the hardware has to work, the typists can just issue a patch.
Mind you, I've worked with custom hardware that has had a heron's nest of extra wires soldered onto the back, which constitute fixes and workarounds, and have thought to myself "I bet that's what software looks like if you could see it" Whilst the hardware has to work, the typists can just issue a patch.
(Obviously all those extra wires get incorporated into the design for when the next version of the PCB is made)
Clockwork Cupcake said:
BrokenSkunk said:
For the avoidance of doubt, as a hardware developer with 30 years experience of providing the stuff that the software runs on (yes really: custom RTOS) I knew damn well I was lighting the touch paper there.
Whilst the hardware has to work, the typists can just issue a patch.
Mind you, I've worked with custom hardware that has had a heron's nest of extra wires soldered onto the back, which constitute fixes and workarounds, and have thought to myself "I bet that's what software looks like if you could see it"Whilst the hardware has to work, the typists can just issue a patch.
(Obviously all those extra wires get incorporated into the design for when the next version of the PCB is made)
All those green lines of code that you see in your mind as you wave your hands about to navigate.
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