Single parents' rights
Discussion
My brother and his girlfriend have recently split up. They have a 2 year old daughter together.
It was the girlfriend's decision to split and despite my brother being completely gutted, he left the family home in order to "not upset the daughter" (this excuse has been used by the girlfriend to pretty much get what she wants). He hadn't cheated, hit her etc etc, it just came out of the blue to all of us.
He's been paying maintenance (which she hasn't declared) and has had amicable access several times a week. Now she's suddenly decided that he can't see his daughter at all (coincidently this coincides with him having a date with another woman).
As an unmarried father what rights does he have? He's also on a relatively low way and there's no way he could afford a lawyer if that would be required.
It was the girlfriend's decision to split and despite my brother being completely gutted, he left the family home in order to "not upset the daughter" (this excuse has been used by the girlfriend to pretty much get what she wants). He hadn't cheated, hit her etc etc, it just came out of the blue to all of us.
He's been paying maintenance (which she hasn't declared) and has had amicable access several times a week. Now she's suddenly decided that he can't see his daughter at all (coincidently this coincides with him having a date with another woman).
As an unmarried father what rights does he have? He's also on a relatively low way and there's no way he could afford a lawyer if that would be required.
He should have parental reponsibilty if his name is on the birth certificate.
Useful resources:
www.fnf.org.uk
www.wikivorce.com
Useful resources:
www.fnf.org.uk
www.wikivorce.com
Some info here: http://www.lawandparents.co.uk/single-parents-righ...
If he is on low wage then he should qualify for legal aide. If he is named on the birth certificate then he has as many rights as a married father. Apparently she can not stop him seeing her unless she has a court order to support this and she would need to show the courts as why access was stopped. Courts will always look through the eyes of the child in terms of what is acceptable and general well being of the child will be paramount so as long as he is not doing anything and it doesn't sound like he is then he needs to try and reason with her first and then see a solicitor on free 30 minute consulation and to be assessed whether he will be entitled to legal aid and his best course of action.
Also
A useful website for him is http://www.communitylegaladvice.org.uk/index.jsp
he can get assessed for legal advice and recieve free legal advice over the phone.
Also
A useful website for him is http://www.communitylegaladvice.org.uk/index.jsp
he can get assessed for legal advice and recieve free legal advice over the phone.
Speaking from experience...ALOT of experience. This is the UK and your brother will find that he will have no parental rights whatsoever. The laws in this country stink to high heaven, the only thing he can do is stay in his ex's good books for the next 14 years (Or until the nipper is out of full time education).
Believe me, If his ex dosnt want him to see the kid then he won't, unless she does something extremely stupid. If he really wants to see the kid regularly he has no choice unless he does as she says, the only way out is to 'make her disappear'!
Believe me, If his ex dosnt want him to see the kid then he won't, unless she does something extremely stupid. If he really wants to see the kid regularly he has no choice unless he does as she says, the only way out is to 'make her disappear'!
Sadly he has very few "rights", and no matter what the law says, if the ex wants to be a b
h then she can.
I had my little girl with me 3 days a week up until new years day. When she walked down my path back to her mother at the end of her time with me, she didn't want to get into "Mummy's car", she went to my partners car instead, wanting to get into that, and kicked up a fuss when her mum dragged her away from it. I haven't seen my little girl to this day, and its heartbreaking. Funnily enough that very same night my car was vandalised...coincidence.....I don't think so!!!!!!!
On a practical note, he should be able to see a solicitor for free for 30 mins to discuss his options. If he wants to go through the courts to seek access and can get legal aid, he will have to go through mediation first, if this fails then he can apply to the courts for either access or custody if he wishes, but it will be an uphill struggle and the odds will be stacked against him.
If he is still talking to the ex, would suggest he records everything, but not tell the ex he is doing it. Amass anything that will help him prove the involvement he has had in his daughters life since they split..ie photos etc. It may help his case once it gets to court. Make any access requests to the ex in writing, so if it gets to court he can show he has tried all other avenues at being reasonable before it got to that stage.
He could try pointing out to the ex that all children have two parents, and his daughter will do far better in life in the years to come if she has good quality involvement from both parents. There have been several studies that have suggested beyond doubt that this is the case.
Whatever he does, it will be a struggle, and emotionally it will drain him, but as long as he remembers why he is going through this then it will all be worth it in the end. Its his daughter too, and he would be failing in his responsibility towards her if he gave up without exploring every possible option open to him.
He is not alone in this, there are many of us who have heard the immortal lines of "I would never stop you seeing your child", only to find that once you move on with your life and a new partner, its all suddenly taken away from you.
Remember he is fighting for his daughter's rights to spend time with both parents, not his rights. Keep all issues between them focussed on their daughters current and future welfare. Don't get wrapped up in tit for tat arguements, it wont help anyone.
As far as finances for his daughter is concerned, make payments by cheque, because if she gets the CSA( or CMEC as I think it is now) involved, he will need to be able to prove he has made payments and a cheque will show that no matter what his ex says.
Best wishes and good luck
h then she can.I had my little girl with me 3 days a week up until new years day. When she walked down my path back to her mother at the end of her time with me, she didn't want to get into "Mummy's car", she went to my partners car instead, wanting to get into that, and kicked up a fuss when her mum dragged her away from it. I haven't seen my little girl to this day, and its heartbreaking. Funnily enough that very same night my car was vandalised...coincidence.....I don't think so!!!!!!!
On a practical note, he should be able to see a solicitor for free for 30 mins to discuss his options. If he wants to go through the courts to seek access and can get legal aid, he will have to go through mediation first, if this fails then he can apply to the courts for either access or custody if he wishes, but it will be an uphill struggle and the odds will be stacked against him.
If he is still talking to the ex, would suggest he records everything, but not tell the ex he is doing it. Amass anything that will help him prove the involvement he has had in his daughters life since they split..ie photos etc. It may help his case once it gets to court. Make any access requests to the ex in writing, so if it gets to court he can show he has tried all other avenues at being reasonable before it got to that stage.
He could try pointing out to the ex that all children have two parents, and his daughter will do far better in life in the years to come if she has good quality involvement from both parents. There have been several studies that have suggested beyond doubt that this is the case.
Whatever he does, it will be a struggle, and emotionally it will drain him, but as long as he remembers why he is going through this then it will all be worth it in the end. Its his daughter too, and he would be failing in his responsibility towards her if he gave up without exploring every possible option open to him.
He is not alone in this, there are many of us who have heard the immortal lines of "I would never stop you seeing your child", only to find that once you move on with your life and a new partner, its all suddenly taken away from you.
Remember he is fighting for his daughter's rights to spend time with both parents, not his rights. Keep all issues between them focussed on their daughters current and future welfare. Don't get wrapped up in tit for tat arguements, it wont help anyone.
As far as finances for his daughter is concerned, make payments by cheque, because if she gets the CSA( or CMEC as I think it is now) involved, he will need to be able to prove he has made payments and a cheque will show that no matter what his ex says.
Best wishes and good luck
anonymous said:
[redacted]
Of course it is, wait till she get a new bloke and wants to spend the night with him, then when he wants to formalise custody he will suddenly not get access again or he'll go to cafcass where it will suddenly come out that he beat her and now they force him to have supervised visits.Then again she may want to pretend she is a family with her new bloke and he won't get access at all because mummy wants to erase daddy from the childs memory.
If you have a pair of balls your rights go out the window.
It took me three years to get regular access to my kids after the other half kidnapped them, despite having a court order.
She breached court ordered access for two years. Each offence is punishable by a fine and up to one year in prison. About 100 offences. I was told to present three sample cases, which I did.
I was then told to drop the charges as they never would have convicted her.
If it was the other way around I'd still be in jail.
It took me three years to get regular access to my kids after the other half kidnapped them, despite having a court order.
She breached court ordered access for two years. Each offence is punishable by a fine and up to one year in prison. About 100 offences. I was told to present three sample cases, which I did.
I was then told to drop the charges as they never would have convicted her.
If it was the other way around I'd still be in jail.
Amused2death said:
If he is still talking to the ex, would suggest he records everything,
This might be good advice....Amused2death said:
but not tell the ex he is doing it.
...but this most certainly isn't. I'm pretty sure it would be illegal to record a conversation without telling the other party, but at the very least it would look underhand, and I very much doubt it could be used in any sort of legal scenario.Gassing Station | The Pie & Piston Archive | Top of Page | What's New | My Stuff