At a dinner party there are certain things you probably shouldn’t admit to possessing. Gonorrhea for example, a Ssangyong Rodius perhaps, and then there's a 'dateline bikini'. The last one is a shame however because what you are actually saying is ‘I drive a speedboat’, and that’s cool.
For one week only Shed is taking to the high seas with our theoretical £1,000 because as far as we know there aren’t any Gatsos in the English Channel (yet). Of course buying a boat with a name that suggests you collect swimwear from lonely hearts columns has its drawbacks, but let’s look at the positives.
You can commute to work looking like Don Johnson, the Monaco Grand Prix will be your second home, an anchor tattoo becomes an acceptable accessory, and you can talk about Howard’s Way with an air of authority. Delving into my extensive knowledge of all things nautical I can tell you that Dateline Boats were possibly made in Dockray Hall, probably around the 1970s.
There wasn’t just the Bikini too, the range spanned to the Suva, Samoa, Bikini, Bounty, Bounty GL, Fijian and Hawiian – perfect for a day on the Solent. This particular Bikini has a heady 60hp from a Mercury outboard motor, which actually sounds like quite a lot for a small boat.
Wakeboarding down the Thames won’t be a problem too, because this one comes with a ski pole, and you also get the usual boaty stuff like an anchor, a set of muffs, and perhaps worryingly, some oars. Wooden legs and hooks are extra, apparently.
This Bikini, or ‘kini as they were otherwise known, is from 1985 and is in good overall condition. The ‘ini has fetching blue leather-look seats and a three-spoke steering wheel that should be held with just one hand in all circumstances.
You get a trailer thrown in and pretty much everything you need for a day on the ocean (apart from life-jackets…you might need those). A ‘ni for £995 – now that’s what I call a bargain…
Ad reads: 'DATELINE BIKINI with 60hp. Mercury Outboard Motor. Electric Start on roller trailer. All rig seems fairly reasonable condition for its age. As well as boat, engine and trailer, package includes set of muffs, overall boat cover, propeller cover, oars, anchor, ski pole. Willingly take out for a run on water for demonstration. Engine runs quite well. End of season and no longer required. Little used for last two years. £995.'