|
funkyrobot
Original Poster
5,941 posts
97 months
|
My 8 year relationship with my fiancée ended today. She said she doesn't think we should be together anymore, so I have moved out. I'm sat here at my parent's with a horrible 'empty' feeling and I don't know what to do.
How do people cope with this? I've never been in such a long relationship before and I really don't know how to handle this horrible feeling.
We split up because she wants kids and I don't (amongst other things such as a failed attempt at marriage). I think I'm doing the right thing by letting her go so she can find someone who wants kids. She is 34, diabetic and her clock is ticking.
I know others have posted on here today with bigger problems, but I thought I'd ask.
My friend recommended online dating websites such as plenty of fish, but it's a bit soon for that.
Thanks all.
|
|
|
Pete102
424 posts
55 months
|
You'll get over it. Your lucky kids aren't involved
|
|
|
Paddy_N_Murphy
15,157 posts
53 months
|
Friends.
+
Booze.
+ new Holidays / Interest en Masse.
Big Ski Trips, Yacht Week, etc etc.
Oh, and MTFU. You've managed to get away !
|
|
|
funkyrobot
Original Poster
5,941 posts
97 months
|
Paddy_N_Murphy said: Friends.
+
Booze.
+ new Holidays / Interest en Masse.
Big Ski Trips, Yacht Week, etc etc.
Oh, and MTFU. You've managed to get away ! I don't drink. I guess I need to start!  It doesn't feel like I got away. I now have twice as many miles to drive to work too. Git!
|
|
|
Paddy_N_Murphy
15,157 posts
53 months
|
funkyrobot said: I don't drink. What? Does not compute.
|
Advertisement
|
|
|
Jasandjules
45,446 posts
98 months
|
You are better of being alone than being in a relationship with someone who resents you and wants kids when you don't. You can move on from this, it will take a bit of time. Spend a bit of time with mates etc for a while before thinking of dating/looking for a partner. And make sure you tell everyone up front you don't want kids so that way you will get together with someone similar.
|
|
|
funkyrobot
Original Poster
5,941 posts
97 months
|
Pete102 said: You'll get over it. Your lucky kids aren't involved We had a situation where we thought she was pregnant. This was cleared up yesterday when the painters arrived. As soon as she knew this she didn't want me around anymore. Nice.
|
|
|
matlee
526 posts
20 months
|
Mine ended for the same reasons albeit 6 years ago. She wanted the whole kids and marriage thing and it just werent for me. She's now married with kids and im single and having the time of my life.
I know what you mean about the empty feeling, it took me a while to get over it. I joined a gym, bought a new wardrobe (clothes) socialised a lot more, set myself career goals and just generally did things which made me feel good about myself. The empty feeling eventually left.
Looking back it was for the best that we split but didnt seem it at the time. These things take time but as much as i hate to say it, and it sounds cliche, time is a healer.
|
|
|
Paddy_N_Murphy
15,157 posts
53 months
|
funkyrobot said: Pete102 said: You'll get over it. Your lucky kids aren't involved We had a situation where we thought she was pregnant. This was cleared up yesterday when the painters arrived. As soon as she knew this she didn't want me around anymore. Nice. Then my friend, good bullet dodged there. A Case of The Mental........... Harsh, but seriously fair. Relax, crack on, and enjoy.
|
|
|
funkyrobot
Original Poster
5,941 posts
97 months
|
Paddy_N_Murphy said: What?
Does not compute. Seriously, I don't hardly touch alcohol. I don't like the stuff. I've had a bit on holiday etc but don't normally go anywhere near it.
|
|
|
Gargamel
5,332 posts
130 months
|
You could call her and beg for her to take you back
Stand outside her bedroom window for a few nights, calling her phone every few minutes
Post her you wet handkerchiefs as proof you miss.
Re consider your reluctance to be a father.
Throw yourself into your work.
Develop a bottle of scotch a day drinking problem
Divide you age by two and add six, make passes at girls of that age until one says yes.
Buy a motorbike
Get a dog
Lose a couple of stone in weight and bump into her, looking fabulous.
|
|
|
funkyrobot
Original Poster
5,941 posts
97 months
|
Thanks for the positive comments above. I have some annual leave due so I may just take a nice holiday. Never been on my own on holiday before but what the hell. Need to find somewhere warm with lots of ladies in bikinis.
|
|
|
Tyrewrecker
6,419 posts
23 months
|
funkyrobot said: Seriously, I don't hardly touch alcohol. I don't like the stuff. I've had a bit on holiday etc but don't normally go anywhere near it. Does not compute either... Anyway - time is a healer. Hope you can get over it quickly and look at the positives.
|
|
|
Tyrewrecker
6,419 posts
23 months
|
funkyrobot said: Thanks for the positive comments above. I have some annual leave due so I may just take a nice holiday. Never been on my own on holiday before but what the hell. Need to find somewhere warm with lots of ladies in bikinis. Thailand
|
|
|
Paddy_N_Murphy
15,157 posts
53 months
|
funkyrobot said: Thanks for the positive comments above. I have some annual leave due so I may just take a nice holiday. Never been on my own on holiday before but what the hell. Need to find somewhere warm with lots of ladies in bikinis. Nope, go on holiday with a crowd. Not on your own. If you have been relationshipiised for 8 years, you have no idea how to crack on with other strangers, Muscl in on a group.
|
|
|
funkyrobot
Original Poster
5,941 posts
97 months
|
Gargamel said: You could call her and beg for her to take you back
Stand outside her bedroom window for a few nights, calling her phone every few minutes
Post her you wet handkerchiefs as proof you miss.
Re consider your reluctance to be a father.
Throw yourself into your work.
Develop a bottle of scotch a day drinking problem
Divide you age by two and add six, make passes at girls of that age until one says yes.
Buy a motorbike
Get a dog
Lose a couple of stone in weight and bump into her, looking fabulous. Blimey. I miss her lots but don't think I'd resort to phone calls all of the time. The weight loss thing would be good.
|
|
|
funkyrobot
Original Poster
5,941 posts
97 months
|
Paddy_N_Murphy said: funkyrobot said: Thanks for the positive comments above. I have some annual leave due so I may just take a nice holiday. Never been on my own on holiday before but what the hell. Need to find somewhere warm with lots of ladies in bikinis. Nope, go on holiday with a crowd. Not on your own. If you have been relationshipiised for 8 years, you have no idea how to crack on with other strangers, Muscl in on a group. I don't have a crowd to go with.  Both my closest friends are saving for their marriages this year.
|
|
|
funkyrobot
Original Poster
5,941 posts
97 months
|
Tyrewrecker said: Thailand I don't like the idea of a lady with an appendage.
|
|
|
Paddy_N_Murphy
15,157 posts
53 months
|
funkyrobot said: I don't have a crowd to go with. Both my closest friends are saving for their marriages this year. Then find a crowd. Go as a fake group, go on your own and dead in the water..... Got money ? What age are you? What do you enjoy doing? Do ya think you could learn to drink 
|
|
|
Gargamel
5,332 posts
130 months
|
funkyrobot said: Blimey. I miss her lots but don't think I'd resort to phone calls all of the time. The weight loss thing would be good. It was more of an al la carte list rather than a set course meal.....
|
|
