All potentially relevant points. But the fact is, I dont have leather seats, its not confined to a box of raisins and at the age of 3 she isnt capable of eating without getting it everywhere. Thats no-ones fault, its just her age. Im not going to not eat an icecream in my car because a 3 year old cant. And Im not going to let the 3 yr old fk the upholstery, fill the electric window buttons with icecream and drop whatevers left on the carpet, by being too scared to tell her no when something isnt appropriate for her. If she sees me with a beer in the kitchen and fancies one herself, do I give her one? Of course not. And if I capitulate on the eating the car, then she will surley wonder why she cant also have that frosty Corona when I have one(doubtful, but you get my point). How quickly her mother forgets that we eat our takeaway curries in the lounge, but the little one cant eat her dinner in there. Why not? "Because she will get it on the sofas." Should I let her light the fire at night as well, so she doesnt get upset? Of course not. Yes, Im afraid it is one rule for one and one rule for another. Because "another" is only 3.

Kids arent adults, theyre kids. They have different rules because they have different knowledge and ability. The only thing unhealthy is when people lose sight of that and dont have the backbone to draw a line with them.

So, what I take from that is that you eat ice creams in front of a three year old, whilst denying her one. Nice. You apparently also sometimes segregate mealtimes from the child, because you won't eat takeaways at a table; or am I misunderstanding?

Then you also invent a slippery slope argument leading to the kid drinking beer and lighting fires in a discussion about eating in the car. And ignored my statement of "Within reason".

I think I'll stick to my approach of letting my son eat in the car, perhaps picking foods that are appropriate for such a situation.

In general, though, as you have taken the discussion that way, I find that if my boy wants something (say, for example, my phone), then preventing him from having it will tend to make him want it even more. Not making a fuss over it, showing him it, letting him play a little, and we get to interact about something exciting, and he also quickly loses interest. I wouldn't allow him to have anything dangerous or fragile (particularly unsupervised), but something messy is entirely fine. Him creating a mess is a very good way of learning and exploring properties of things and his abilities, and I'd sooner he learnt and explored than I squashed his sense of adventure. If you think that is me being too scared or lacking in backbone to "draw the line", then so be it.

My kids are not allowed to eat in the car.

The occasional drink (water) if they are really thursty (after the park or whatever).

The ONLY time food is allowed is on long summer holiday trips.

Yes, if he is hungry. Just as I'd eat if I were hungry. Sorry for being retarded.
Oh, and some journey planning tips: try to choose foods which are not ridiculously messy, i.e. not milk/milkshakes.

Really you let kids eat at 4am if they are hungry? Oh dear

I only used the word retarded due to the post i quoted.

I don't have kids, but I don't let anyone eat in my car.

My MD lets his kids eat in his car and it always looks like a skip.

I should have explained: if we eat in the lounge, its after she has gone to bed or is away anyway at her Dad's. Otherwise, its all together in the dinging room. Nevertheless, she cant eat in the lounge at all.

Sometimes I'll come out from the fuel station with a Mars Icecream. Just for me. And I eat it in the car. Should I ensure she eats exactly what I eat when I eat it, just to be fair? Cause Im on about 3000calories a day at the moment. But if you're sure, what the hell. Heaven forbid I should say "no" to her for anything. At home, she can make all the mess she wants. There are places she can play with play-doh etc. She can go outside and get muddy etc etc. But she cant eat messy st in my car. And Im going to confuse her by saying "you can eat that, but not that", so she doesnt eat anything. If she's hungry or its mealtime, we'll stop somewhere.

Nowhere have I said that she is denied anything and everything she asks for. She can pick up my iphone and scan through the pictures and videos and select games, as well as anyone. I alluded to things like fire and beer to demonstrate that simply saying "If youre eating in the car, she should be allowed to as well." holds absolutely no water as an argument. Otherwise, where do you draw the line? There are lots of things I do that she cant or isnt allowed to. Creating a rule that ensures that my posessions stay in good condition because I know a 3yr old lacks the skills or understanding to look after velour, harldy amounts to stunting her development in some way, does it?

fk me, its not hard. Hand-wringing of the highest order...

I don't have kids but when I was one I never ate in the car. Not because we weren't allowed, but because we were middle class and could afford to eat at the Welcome Break Granary. (smug face)

They are not allowed to eat in the car as a general rule, in fact none of us is allowed. We rarely make long enough journeys that span meal times and if we do, we make stops for food and toilet breaks (and my OH smokes) and also to stretch the legs.

I am fed up of cleaning when there is no reason to do so and no matter how careful they promise to be, there is always something left. They can wait, they won't starve until we get the chance to stop and let them eat.

However they are 14 and 11 so maybe older then the children in some of these responses.

Jeez. Is this a coach trip from the 'detailing' forum?