Effing cancer is an effing effer, frankly
Discussion
jbudgie said:
Tell your dad not to worry about the colostomy bag --after a few weeks he will be completely used to it.
I had one for eleven months and then had the reversal, which is worse than having the bag.
It is four years since the reversal for me and still only justabout becoming anything like normal.
My consultant told me that a lot of people go back to the bag as they find the reversal too much of a problem.
Send me an email if you want to know anymore.
Thank you for your kind offer.I had one for eleven months and then had the reversal, which is worse than having the bag.
It is four years since the reversal for me and still only justabout becoming anything like normal.
My consultant told me that a lot of people go back to the bag as they find the reversal too much of a problem.
Send me an email if you want to know anymore.
Fortunately, my sister is a GP and is keeping a very close eye on things. Of course, she has experience of patients like this, so he has all the advice and information he could need. It's only been 72 hrs after the op, so I think in a day of two he will be more accepting. Thank you again for your offer and if I do need some 'outside' advice I will drop you a note. Sometimes it is good to talk with someone who has experienced it, as opposed to the 'doctor'.
On a plus note, they've taken some of the lines out (yesterday) and the epidural today. He's had a more difficult day as the pain has kicked in a bit, but overall he's doing ok. We went for a couple of short walks around the ward which he managed with a little support, his left leg is still a little unsteady due to the epidural.
Hopefully the drain and cath will be out tomorrow and he will be feeling up to learning how to change the bag, so far the nurses have dealt with that. If that little lot go to plan, and they get the pain management under control he might be home on Sat.
Regards,
Martin
Edited by mph999 on Thursday 16th May 23:31
Edited by mph999 on Thursday 16th May 23:38
br d said:
Consultant says there are some new things growing in there that he doesn't like the look of so I have to go in for another biopsy on Friday and play the waiting game again...
Follow up on this:Just got back from having pieces of scarred meat hacked out of my lungs and feel like I've been beaten up by a gang of cage fighters BUT.... consultant says NO CANCER!!
Still have to wait for the official lab results but my consultant is very professional and circumspect, I don't believe he would say this to me and my partner if he had any doubts. The Sarcoidosis is playing dirty and progressing into my lymph nodes but Ive known for five years that the bugger is out to get me, the main thing is I'm not looking at an immediate decline.
Let me say that again for my own selfish satisfaction: NO CANCER!
Thank for your messages of support, it really does help when you're staring something like this in the face.
br d said:
br d said:
Consultant says there are some new things growing in there that he doesn't like the look of so I have to go in for another biopsy on Friday and play the waiting game again...
Follow up on this:Just got back from having pieces of scarred meat hacked out of my lungs and feel like I've been beaten up by a gang of cage fighters BUT.... consultant says NO CANCER!!
Still have to wait for the official lab results but my consultant is very professional and circumspect, I don't believe he would say this to me and my partner if he had any doubts. The Sarcoidosis is playing dirty and progressing into my lymph nodes but Ive known for five years that the bugger is out to get me, the main thing is I'm not looking at an immediate decline.
Let me say that again for my own selfish satisfaction: NO CANCER!
Thank for your messages of support, it really does help when you're staring something like this in the face.
br d said:
Follow up on this:
Just got back from having pieces of scarred meat hacked out of my lungs and feel like I've been beaten up by a gang of cage fighters BUT.... consultant says NO CANCER!!
Still have to wait for the official lab results but my consultant is very professional and circumspect, I don't believe he would say this to me and my partner if he had any doubts. The Sarcoidosis is playing dirty and progressing into my lymph nodes but Ive known for five years that the bugger is out to get me, the main thing is I'm not looking at an immediate decline.
Let me say that again for my own selfish satisfaction: NO CANCER!
Thank for your messages of support, it really does help when you're staring something like this in the face.
Just got back from having pieces of scarred meat hacked out of my lungs and feel like I've been beaten up by a gang of cage fighters BUT.... consultant says NO CANCER!!
Still have to wait for the official lab results but my consultant is very professional and circumspect, I don't believe he would say this to me and my partner if he had any doubts. The Sarcoidosis is playing dirty and progressing into my lymph nodes but Ive known for five years that the bugger is out to get me, the main thing is I'm not looking at an immediate decline.
Let me say that again for my own selfish satisfaction: NO CANCER!
Thank for your messages of support, it really does help when you're staring something like this in the face.
f
k you cancer, fk you a lot!!!!!!mph999 said:
jbudgie said:
Tell your dad not to worry about the colostomy bag --after a few weeks he will be completely used to it.
I had one for eleven months and then had the reversal, which is worse than having the bag.
It is four years since the reversal for me and still only justabout becoming anything like normal.
My consultant told me that a lot of people go back to the bag as they find the reversal too much of a problem.
Send me an email if you want to know anymore.
Thank you for your kind offer.I had one for eleven months and then had the reversal, which is worse than having the bag.
It is four years since the reversal for me and still only justabout becoming anything like normal.
My consultant told me that a lot of people go back to the bag as they find the reversal too much of a problem.
Send me an email if you want to know anymore.
Fortunately, my sister is a GP and is keeping a very close eye on things. Of course, she has experience of patients like this, so he has all the advice and information he could need. It's only been 72 hrs after the op, so I think in a day of two he will be more accepting. Thank you again for your offer and if I do need some 'outside' advice I will drop you a note. Sometimes it is good to talk with someone who has experienced it, as opposed to the 'doctor'.
On a plus note, they've taken some of the lines out (yesterday) and the epidural today. He's had a more difficult day as the pain has kicked in a bit, but overall he's doing ok. We went for a couple of short walks around the ward which he managed with a little support, his left leg is still a little unsteady due to the epidural.
Hopefully the drain and cath will be out tomorrow and he will be feeling up to learning how to change the bag, so far the nurses have dealt with that. If that little lot go to plan, and they get the pain management under control he might be home on Sat.
Regards,
Martin
Was in hospital for nine days in total.
Had the cath in for about 3 weeks even after going home.Then had to do I.S.C. for a quite a few months after that.
He might have a problem in that area --its common.
jbudgie said:
mph999 said:
jbudgie said:
Tell your dad not to worry about the colostomy bag --after a few weeks he will be completely used to it.
I had one for eleven months and then had the reversal, which is worse than having the bag.
It is four years since the reversal for me and still only justabout becoming anything like normal.
My consultant told me that a lot of people go back to the bag as they find the reversal too much of a problem.
Send me an email if you want to know anymore.
Thank you for your kind offer.I had one for eleven months and then had the reversal, which is worse than having the bag.
It is four years since the reversal for me and still only justabout becoming anything like normal.
My consultant told me that a lot of people go back to the bag as they find the reversal too much of a problem.
Send me an email if you want to know anymore.
Fortunately, my sister is a GP and is keeping a very close eye on things. Of course, she has experience of patients like this, so he has all the advice and information he could need. It's only been 72 hrs after the op, so I think in a day of two he will be more accepting. Thank you again for your offer and if I do need some 'outside' advice I will drop you a note. Sometimes it is good to talk with someone who has experienced it, as opposed to the 'doctor'.
On a plus note, they've taken some of the lines out (yesterday) and the epidural today. He's had a more difficult day as the pain has kicked in a bit, but overall he's doing ok. We went for a couple of short walks around the ward which he managed with a little support, his left leg is still a little unsteady due to the epidural.
Hopefully the drain and cath will be out tomorrow and he will be feeling up to learning how to change the bag, so far the nurses have dealt with that. If that little lot go to plan, and they get the pain management under control he might be home on Sat.
Regards,
Martin
Was in hospital for nine days in total.
Had the cath in for about 3 weeks even after going home.Then had to do I.S.C. for a quite a few months after that.
He might have a problem in that area --its common.
M
br d said:
br d said:
Consultant says there are some new things growing in there that he doesn't like the look of so I have to go in for another biopsy on Friday and play the waiting game again...
Follow up on this:Just got back from having pieces of scarred meat hacked out of my lungs and feel like I've been beaten up by a gang of cage fighters BUT.... consultant says NO CANCER!!
Still have to wait for the official lab results but my consultant is very professional and circumspect, I don't believe he would say this to me and my partner if he had any doubts. The Sarcoidosis is playing dirty and progressing into my lymph nodes but Ive known for five years that the bugger is out to get me, the main thing is I'm not looking at an immediate decline.
Let me say that again for my own selfish satisfaction: NO CANCER!
Brilliant news
f
k you cancer!Thank for your messages of support, it really does help when you're staring something like this in the face.
My father-in-law has got a maximum of 6 months left. He was disgnosed with colan cancer back in November 2012, which had already spread to his liver. He has had a pretty intense chemo sessions for the last 6 months and found out on Tuesday that the cancer is as big as it was if not bigger, then it was when he first found out. Cancer is truely evil, he is only 53 years old and is leaving behind a wife and 3 children. Only blessing is that he managed to see us get married in March.
Just feel so helpless for my husband, he is in so much pain knowing that he is going to lose his dad soon and I just want to take his pain away. Brings back all the feelings I had 13 years ago watching my Grandad die from lung cancer.
Cancer can do one and F
K right off!
My thoughts are with every single person who has ever suffered from it or lost a loved one.
Just feel so helpless for my husband, he is in so much pain knowing that he is going to lose his dad soon and I just want to take his pain away. Brings back all the feelings I had 13 years ago watching my Grandad die from lung cancer.
Cancer can do one and F
K right off!My thoughts are with every single person who has ever suffered from it or lost a loved one.
MaxMX5 said:
My father-in-law has got a maximum of 6 months left. He was disgnosed with colan cancer back in November 2012, which had already spread to his liver. He has had a pretty intense chemo sessions for the last 6 months and found out on Tuesday that the cancer is as big as it was if not bigger, then it was when he first found out. Cancer is truely evil, he is only 53 years old and is leaving behind a wife and 3 children. Only blessing is that he managed to see us get married in March.
Just feel so helpless for my husband, he is in so much pain knowing that he is going to lose his dad soon and I just want to take his pain away. Brings back all the feelings I had 13 years ago watching my Grandad die from lung cancer.
Cancer can do one and FK right off!
My thoughts are with every single person who has ever suffered from it or lost a loved one.
Emma, it's never easy standing at the side watching a partner go through this cruel misery and feeling so helpless. It is only made easier knowing that you do all you can to support and love... and leave no stone unturned, no conversation wanting or unspoken. Loss however profound can be at least in part eased by knowing there were nothing left unsaid, nothing left undone.Just feel so helpless for my husband, he is in so much pain knowing that he is going to lose his dad soon and I just want to take his pain away. Brings back all the feelings I had 13 years ago watching my Grandad die from lung cancer.
Cancer can do one and F
K right off!My thoughts are with every single person who has ever suffered from it or lost a loved one.
And yes, f
k cancer for all the st it brings; we stand, two fingers raised and remain unbroken to it's hard waves and jagged edges.Thanks for your kind words.
I have told him that he needs to talk about how he feels as bottling up will make it so much worse.I ask him everyday before bed whether he wants to talk about anything, more so to prompt him to talk if he wants. I have also told him that he hasnt got to talk to me if its easier, but he needs to talk to someone. He is quite close to my own parents who have offered numerous times their support for him should he need it.
I think at the moment he finds it hard to talk about it as it makes it more real and prehaps he thinks that if he doesnt acknowledge it then it will go away. His dad at the moment doesnt look like someone who has got months left to live, however after seeing my grandad die, I am all too aware of how fast people can go down hill.
I have said to him that if he can, he needs to be strong for his dad and if he wants to breakdown when he gets home then that is fine and to try and enjoy the time he spends with him, not think of what is coming as he will need those memories later. I have also told him he may want to think about things he wants to tell him so he doesnt wish afterwards that he could have told him things.
He doesnt seem to know what to do or how to behave, I am just saying to him what I would be trying to do should the situation be reversed and be my dad and not his.
When my grandad passed, my mum had depression for 2 years because she didnt talk about it, so I am very keen that he does talk as my mum has said that not talking made it harder for her to deal with. At the same time I am also trying to be respectful of his grief as everyone grieves in different ways.
I have told him that he needs to talk about how he feels as bottling up will make it so much worse.I ask him everyday before bed whether he wants to talk about anything, more so to prompt him to talk if he wants. I have also told him that he hasnt got to talk to me if its easier, but he needs to talk to someone. He is quite close to my own parents who have offered numerous times their support for him should he need it.
I think at the moment he finds it hard to talk about it as it makes it more real and prehaps he thinks that if he doesnt acknowledge it then it will go away. His dad at the moment doesnt look like someone who has got months left to live, however after seeing my grandad die, I am all too aware of how fast people can go down hill.
I have said to him that if he can, he needs to be strong for his dad and if he wants to breakdown when he gets home then that is fine and to try and enjoy the time he spends with him, not think of what is coming as he will need those memories later. I have also told him he may want to think about things he wants to tell him so he doesnt wish afterwards that he could have told him things.
He doesnt seem to know what to do or how to behave, I am just saying to him what I would be trying to do should the situation be reversed and be my dad and not his.
When my grandad passed, my mum had depression for 2 years because she didnt talk about it, so I am very keen that he does talk as my mum has said that not talking made it harder for her to deal with. At the same time I am also trying to be respectful of his grief as everyone grieves in different ways.
MaxMX5 said:
...
He doesnt seem to know what to do or how to behave, I am just saying to him what I would be trying to do should the situation be reversed and be my dad and not his...
Many people don't 'know how to behave'. Oh there are so many reasons why that is the case, from the way we are bought up with respect to showing feelings, to believs about 'how men should be'. Truth of it, as you well know, there is no right or wrong way, just 'a way', the way unique to each and every one of us. He doesnt seem to know what to do or how to behave, I am just saying to him what I would be trying to do should the situation be reversed and be my dad and not his...
From what you have written, you can do little more than you are - and having a caring and understanding partner is at a time like this, a total blessing. For you to, just be yourself and process what resonates with you in your own grand father's death.
To know that you are there for your hubby is something that he will be eternally appreciative of - it counts for so much. Peace.
drivin_me_nuts said:
MaxMX5 said:
...
He doesnt seem to know what to do or how to behave, I am just saying to him what I would be trying to do should the situation be reversed and be my dad and not his...
Many people don't 'know how to behave'. Oh there are so many reasons why that is the case, from the way we are bought up with respect to showing feelings, to believs about 'how men should be'. Truth of it, as you well know, there is no right or wrong way, just 'a way', the way unique to each and every one of us. He doesnt seem to know what to do or how to behave, I am just saying to him what I would be trying to do should the situation be reversed and be my dad and not his...
From what you have written, you can do little more than you are - and having a caring and understanding partner is at a time like this, a total blessing. For you to, just be yourself and process what resonates with you in your own grand father's death.
To know that you are there for your hubby is something that he will be eternally appreciative of - it counts for so much. Peace.
I'm sure you have support from the Macmillan nurses, but if not, this could perhaps be a person your FIL could talk with.
M
drivin_me_nuts said:
MaxMX5 said:
...
He doesnt seem to know what to do or how to behave, I am just saying to him what I would be trying to do should the situation be reversed and be my dad and not his...
Many people don't 'know how to behave'. Oh there are so many reasons why that is the case, from the way we are bought up with respect to showing feelings, to believs about 'how men should be'. Truth of it, as you well know, there is no right or wrong way, just 'a way', the way unique to each and every one of us. He doesnt seem to know what to do or how to behave, I am just saying to him what I would be trying to do should the situation be reversed and be my dad and not his...
From what you have written, you can do little more than you are - and having a caring and understanding partner is at a time like this, a total blessing. For you to, just be yourself and process what resonates with you in your own grand father's death.
To know that you are there for your hubby is something that he will be eternally appreciative of - it counts for so much. Peace.
I have my difficult emotional moments, mainly when I see someone who looks like him, and discuss that with my wonderful supportive wife, but I still don't like talking about his death.
I suppose I am trying to says we are all different, and it is perfectly normal to not want to talk about it.
Just be there and be supportive, as you are doing, and follow his lead.
br d said:
br d said:
Consultant says there are some new things growing in there that he doesn't like the look of so I have to go in for another biopsy on Friday and play the waiting game again...
Follow up on this:Just got back from having pieces of scarred meat hacked out of my lungs and feel like I've been beaten up by a gang of cage fighters BUT.... consultant says NO CANCER!!
Still have to wait for the official lab results but my consultant is very professional and circumspect, I don't believe he would say this to me and my partner if he had any doubts. The Sarcoidosis is playing dirty and progressing into my lymph nodes but Ive known for five years that the bugger is out to get me, the main thing is I'm not looking at an immediate decline.
Let me say that again for my own selfish satisfaction: NO CANCER!
Thank for your messages of support, it really does help when you're staring something like this in the face.
All the best mate. Glad he states no cancer, awesome.
So why a picture of me and Chesney Hawkes in this thread?
I met him at Rewind in 2010 and told him a story about all my mates singing his song 'One and only' whenever they saw me, the reason, in 2006 I was diagnosed with testicular cancer and had an orchidectomy on my right 'friend'. He was greatly amused by the story and said he would remember it whenever he sung the song.
Was given the all clear in 2011.
Fingers crossed that's the last I see of the little fecker (cancer I mean not Chesney!!)
br d said:
Follow up on this:
Just got back from having pieces of scarred meat hacked out of my lungs and feel like I've been beaten up by a gang of cage fighters BUT.... consultant says NO CANCER!!
Still have to wait for the official lab results but my consultant is very professional and circumspect, I don't believe he would say this to me and my partner if he had any doubts. The Sarcoidosis is playing dirty and progressing into my lymph nodes but Ive known for five years that the bugger is out to get me, the main thing is I'm not looking at an immediate decline.
Let me say that again for my own selfish satisfaction: NO CANCER!
Thank for your messages of support, it really does help when you're staring something like this in the face.
Just caught up with this Brad! Was worried at your first post but this is great news Just got back from having pieces of scarred meat hacked out of my lungs and feel like I've been beaten up by a gang of cage fighters BUT.... consultant says NO CANCER!!
Still have to wait for the official lab results but my consultant is very professional and circumspect, I don't believe he would say this to me and my partner if he had any doubts. The Sarcoidosis is playing dirty and progressing into my lymph nodes but Ive known for five years that the bugger is out to get me, the main thing is I'm not looking at an immediate decline.
Let me say that again for my own selfish satisfaction: NO CANCER!
Thank for your messages of support, it really does help when you're staring something like this in the face.
now go out there, chill and enjoy yourselves!! Put some more miles on the Bull for me 
Boshly said:
br d said:
Follow up on this:
Just got back from having pieces of scarred meat hacked out of my lungs and feel like I've been beaten up by a gang of cage fighters BUT.... consultant says NO CANCER!!
Still have to wait for the official lab results but my consultant is very professional and circumspect, I don't believe he would say this to me and my partner if he had any doubts. The Sarcoidosis is playing dirty and progressing into my lymph nodes but Ive known for five years that the bugger is out to get me, the main thing is I'm not looking at an immediate decline.
Let me say that again for my own selfish satisfaction: NO CANCER!
Thank for your messages of support, it really does help when you're staring something like this in the face.
Just caught up with this Brad! Was worried at your first post but this is great news Just got back from having pieces of scarred meat hacked out of my lungs and feel like I've been beaten up by a gang of cage fighters BUT.... consultant says NO CANCER!!
Still have to wait for the official lab results but my consultant is very professional and circumspect, I don't believe he would say this to me and my partner if he had any doubts. The Sarcoidosis is playing dirty and progressing into my lymph nodes but Ive known for five years that the bugger is out to get me, the main thing is I'm not looking at an immediate decline.
Let me say that again for my own selfish satisfaction: NO CANCER!
Thank for your messages of support, it really does help when you're staring something like this in the face.
now go out there, chill and enjoy yourselves!! Put some more miles on the Bull for me How's things with you mate? I looked for you at Cliveden, was you over there?
Taking the 560 to the Loire Valley in a couple of weeks so I will drive it like I stole it and raise a glass of red to you!
br d said:
Kind words Andy, thank you. Still haven't had the "official" stamp yet but confident it will be fine.
How's things with you mate? I looked for you at Cliveden, was you over there?
Taking the 560 to the Loire Valley in a couple of weeks so I will drive it like I stole it and raise a glass of red to you!
Missed Cliveden as my consultant gave me the thumbs up to go on the Nordkapp/Arctic circle trip I had planned and then pulled out of when I found out about my cancer ( www.drivenatheart.co.uk ) How's things with you mate? I looked for you at Cliveden, was you over there?
Taking the 560 to the Loire Valley in a couple of weeks so I will drive it like I stole it and raise a glass of red to you!
5250 miles in two weeks over Norwegian mountains and fjords was awesome! And the £52k raised to date is also pretty good 
Things ok with me, next blood tests and consultation in August so see how we get on. Definitely can't complain though. You make sure you have a great drive and we'll have to catch up soon.
Oh, and to get back on topic I still think that you can f
k right off cancer you fking horrible ttBoshly said:
br d said:
Kind words Andy, thank you. Still haven't had the "official" stamp yet but confident it will be fine.
How's things with you mate? I looked for you at Cliveden, was you over there?
Taking the 560 to the Loire Valley in a couple of weeks so I will drive it like I stole it and raise a glass of red to you!
Missed Cliveden as my consultant gave me the thumbs up to go on the Nordkapp/Arctic circle trip I had planned and then pulled out of when I found out about my cancer ( www.drivenatheart.co.uk ) How's things with you mate? I looked for you at Cliveden, was you over there?
Taking the 560 to the Loire Valley in a couple of weeks so I will drive it like I stole it and raise a glass of red to you!
5250 miles in two weeks over Norwegian mountains and fjords was awesome! And the £52k raised to date is also pretty good Things ok with me, next blood tests and consultation in August so see how we get on. Definitely can't complain though. You make sure you have a great drive and we'll have to catch up soon.
Oh, and to get back on topic I still think that you can f
k right off cancer you fking horrible ttI'd love some more details of the trip but I'll settle for a link to where I can purchase the DVD when it's done.
Oddly, I had been looking at Nordkapp very recently on wikipedia, I ended up reading the entire history of its peoples and politics and had vowed to go there one day myself, looks wonderful.
And in the spirit of the thread, you'd already stuck a firm two fingers up to cancer Andy, but to then take on this trip immediately after in the name of charity was really kicking it in the b
ks. Long may you piss on the foul fking filth!br d said:
br d said:
Consultant says there are some new things growing in there that he doesn't like the look of so I have to go in for another biopsy on Friday and play the waiting game again...
Follow up on this:Just got back from having pieces of scarred meat hacked out of my lungs and feel like I've been beaten up by a gang of cage fighters BUT.... consultant says NO CANCER!!
Still have to wait for the official lab results but my consultant is very professional and circumspect, I don't believe he would say this to me and my partner if he had any doubts. The Sarcoidosis is playing dirty and progressing into my lymph nodes but Ive known for five years that the bugger is out to get me, the main thing is I'm not looking at an immediate decline.
Let me say that again for my own selfish satisfaction: NO CANCER!
Thank for your messages of support, it really does help when you're staring something like this in the face.
I had no idea of any of this when we met, mate.
Otherwise I'd obviously have asked after your health.
Extremely glad about your good news.
Enjoy France!
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