Timewasters - nukem from the orbit
Timewasters - nukem from the orbit
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Boni

Original Poster:

43 posts

148 months

Friday 31st March 2017
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It is a little rant here, sorry, but I have to unload my frustration.

I did not get it why people put "no timewasters, please" (or compatible) in advs here - I am not native, so I though it's kind or idiom or tradition or whocares. Or maybe it is about internet spamers and so?

Until I try to sell my first car in UK (more-less now, not on PH but other websites). To understand a bit - we talk about SotW, not about car: 20yrs lexus GS with 600 pricetag, on short MOT and not mint, but driveable and ok.

This is bloody unbelievable, what kind of questions, issues, "negotiations" I got from potential buyers - before any visit! I try to be polite but yesterday I was close to answer "I HAVE NO IDEA OF MPGS AND THERE IS NO TRIP COMPUTER IN GS FOR REASON - IF YOU HAVE TO ASK ABOUT MGPS OF 3.0 LITRE 200HP EXECUTIVE, YOU COULD NOT AFFORD THIS CAR".

And today I was close to put disclaimer on both adverts, second paragraph like "Before you ask me question about any issue not included in my description, please, do this: open Halfords page with "all bikes", sort high to low price, and scroll to page with bikes in price range of this car. Next rethink your question. If still in doubt, buy the bike. Thank you for your cooperation."

It is only me, it is my bad luck, or it is normal here? Enlight me, please.

surveyor

18,392 posts

200 months

Friday 31st March 2017
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If the advert is as clear as the post I kind of understand the questions...

akirk

5,775 posts

130 months

Friday 31st March 2017
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Boni said:
And today I was close to put disclaimer on both adverts, second paragraph like "Before you ask me question about any issue not included in my description, please, do this: open Halfords page with "all bikes", sort high to low price, and scroll to page with bikes in price range of this car. Next rethink your question. If still in doubt, buy the bike. Thank you for your cooperation."
Please do - smile
great idea...

but yes, life is full of idiots...

BigLion

1,497 posts

115 months

Friday 31st March 2017
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surveyor said:
If the advert is as clear as the post I kind of understand the questions...
hehe

hornetrider

63,161 posts

221 months

Friday 31st March 2017
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Boni said:
And today I was close to put disclaimer on both adverts, second paragraph like "Before you ask me question about any issue not included in my description, please, do this: open Halfords page with "all bikes", sort high to low price, and scroll to page with bikes in price range of this car. Next rethink your question. If still in doubt, buy the bike. Thank you for your cooperation."
laugh

Like it!

Venturist

3,472 posts

211 months

Friday 31st March 2017
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Two options:
1. Deal with the questions no matter how annoying
2. Ignore

Depends how much you value your time.
In my experience I can easily tell who's a serious buyer by the questions they ask and the tone they write in. So I ignore anyone else. May miss out on a few good customers but I'm willing to take that chance.

Boni

Original Poster:

43 posts

148 months

Friday 31st March 2017
quotequote all
surveyor said:
If the advert is as clear as the post I kind of understand the questions...
If you want to play grammar nazi here, you missed the point. If you did not understand anything in my post, be my guest, ask the question - I am Zen Master of Answers to Moronic Questions this week.

BTW grammar nazi - as I said, I am not native; I am not in the position to rant about somebodys English here, but most emails I got are like this (copy-pasted):

"hi there you stoll got the old girl for sale do you think it will pass it's MOT with just the exhaust Seals getting fixed [...]"

But I could handle this, even if it is not shakespearean enough for my taste. Problem is, I put exactly this in advert: "I planned to fix exhaust's seals and trust to pass MOT with flying colours". But the guy still asked like above.

surveyor

18,392 posts

200 months

Friday 31st March 2017
quotequote all
Boni said:
surveyor said:
If the advert is as clear as the post I kind of understand the questions...
If you want to play grammar nazi here, you missed the point. If you did not understand anything in my post, be my guest, ask the question - I am Zen Master of Answers to Moronic Questions this week.

BTW grammar nazi - as I said, I am not native; I am not in the position to rant about somebodys English here, but most emails I got are like this (copy-pasted):

"hi there you stoll got the old girl for sale do you think it will pass it's MOT with just the exhaust Seals getting fixed [...]"

But I could handle this, even if it is not shakespearean enough for my taste. Problem is, I put exactly this in advert: "I planned to fix exhaust's seals and trust to pass MOT with flying colours". But the guy still asked like above.
No problem with the grammer, just the order and amount of words...

fido

17,801 posts

271 months

Friday 31st March 2017
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I often add stuff like the following below an advert if I get too many timewasters.

For example, selling a lens at the moment. £2900 or thereabouts new - and desperados trying to knock it down by telling me they can get a 10 year old one cheaper. No sh8t Sherlock.

'** I am getting a few timewasters telling me they can buy a cheaper lens (which either turns out to be an older lens or, in one case, a previous model). My advice is to buy that lens instead if you prefer it.'

Fair enough, if they are asking for car specs like MPG, but they are right to be concerned about faults and getting past an MOT - maybe they want to suss out if you are straight or not?

Edited by fido on Friday 31st March 18:50

Boni

Original Poster:

43 posts

148 months

Friday 31st March 2017
quotequote all
fido said:
For example, selling a lens at the moment. £2900 or thereabouts new - and desperados trying to knock it down by telling me they can get a 10 year old one cheaper. No sh8t Sherlock.

'** I am getting a few timewasters telling me they can buy a cheaper lens (which either turns out to be an older lens or, in one case, a previous model). My advice is to buy that lens instead if you prefer it.'

Fair enough, if they are asking for car specs like MPG, but they are right to be concerned about faults and getting past an MOT - maybe they want to suss out if you are straight or not?
Yeah, but do you really think you (or they) could check me out if I am straight by bloody email? I get it if you phone me and ask same issues as in advert (maybe you are great mentalist, who knows) or best way, visit and talk face to face, with all your bullcrap detectors in DEFCON2. I like this way as buyer too! But not by email or text, please, it's stupid and only waste of time of both parties...

OTOH I really started to put something like your disclaimer, for every guy doubted about future MOT - "I suggest you could wait two weeks, until I will do MOT". Some of them answered like "I'd be happy to wait, but it may be sold by then". NO WAY SHERLOCK.

One more thing I missed in first post - it's my 15th private car selling (if I count correctly, I am not sure). So I am familiar with situation, but never have seen before such flow and grade of "smart-in-own-way people".

surveyor

18,392 posts

200 months

Friday 31st March 2017
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Some care are worse than others. My highlight for daft buyers was a high mileage 520d

Triumph Man

9,122 posts

184 months

Friday 31st March 2017
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How fast will I have to go to kill gypsy?

Cold

16,070 posts

106 months

Friday 31st March 2017
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Would I buy a car from the OP? scratchchin

bristolracer

5,763 posts

165 months

Friday 31st March 2017
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I have found when selling a cheaper vehicle it is better to state

No texts, no emails,if you are interested in the car then please ring me.

Be aware that you will get people who will want to know about the fault, and also people who are hoping to get the car cheap and flip it.
If you have the work done and can present it with a new mot then you will get a different type of buyer.
However the market for a tired thirsty executive car will be small, at £600 it may make sense to break it.

Boni

Original Poster:

43 posts

148 months

Friday 31st March 2017
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Cold said:
Would I buy a car from the OP? scratchchin
Tree of gum or Traders from Auto webpages, if you know what I mean wink filter as lexus GS300 1997 silver, Glasgow radius 30 miles, price less than 700 and Bob is your uncle. BUT HER MOT IS SHORT!11! wink

Yes, I know after MOT I will have in my yard 5 guys fighting for car, figuratively speaking - exactly that was situation and deal for our newer lex, with fresh MOT. And yes, scrapyard is always an option, but car is mucho mucho too good for scrap.

Edited by Boni on Friday 31st March 22:48

Loyly

18,137 posts

175 months

Friday 31st March 2017
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The worst I've done for sellers and tyre kickers was flogging my CG125 for £700. I would have thought a well sorted little motorcycle that does 120mpg being sold for the price of a decent exhaust and a new chain for a proper motorbike would have been piss easy. Unfortunately, it attracted all sorts of time wasters and dheads. Wisdom has it that 125's are a piece of piss to sell but I was tempted to wheel that fker into the Tyne on more than one occasiom.

anonymous-user

70 months

Saturday 1st April 2017
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OP, your adverts - particularly the Gumtree one - are far too 'wordy'. I'd just stick to the bare facts. I know you'd like to effuse over your love for the car but, quite frankly, no-one's likely to be bothered. Too long a description (particularly in a non-native tongue) comes across as a bit 'desperate' - sometimes 'less is more'. Also, I wouldn't even bother mentioning the (very limited) 'customising' - I'd imagine that would put many people off.

Good luck with the sale - I'm sure there's someone out there who wants it...

Tankrizzo

7,746 posts

209 months

Saturday 1st April 2017
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Triumph Man said:
How fast will I have to go to kill gypsy?
rofl

Boni

Original Poster:

43 posts

148 months

Saturday 1st April 2017
quotequote all
280E said:
OP, your adverts - particularly the Gumtree one - are far too 'wordy'. I'd just stick to the bare facts. I know you'd like to effuse over your love for the car but, quite frankly, no-one's likely to be bothered. Too long a description (particularly in a non-native tongue) comes across as a bit 'desperate' - sometimes 'less is more'. Also, I wouldn't even bother mentioning the (very limited) 'customising' - I'd imagine that would put many people off.
And EXACTLY for this reason I mention "customising"! it is not a bonus, it's warning... I don't want to invite the guy from Inverness to Glasgow (real folk) to hear "wait a moment, you ruined all dash and you lost original indicators and there are not original rims and you call this classic? are you f... kidding me?". FYI I experienced a lot of ugly situations like this before (I modify my cars cheap, easy and mindless, and next I got a zylions complaints from fans of brand or model or from potential buyers, who frantically stick to "factory original piece of crap", sorry, "of spec").

And for every one advice about car adverts like your "less is more" I got another advice "more is more", like "put more pictures and full description, it's 50% more chances for success". My idea is - nobody has clue what is efficient or not in this kinds of advertising, everybody guessing by anecdata.

Thank you for wish me luck.

Edited by Boni on Saturday 1st April 15:49

anonymous-user

70 months

Saturday 1st April 2017
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I have a big soft spot for GS300s after years lusting after an Aristo, but my honest opinion is that in its current state, your car is simply too much. GSs have practically no interest or following around them to work with the 'classic' angle (and I suspect never will). They have no value to breakers because, well, its a typically over engineered 90s Toyota product meaning catastrophic failures are virtually unheard of. This fact will also dent the value of your car having relatively low mileage, because an objectively tidier example with 50,000+ miles more isn't really much more likely to throw up big bills or breakdown. And this is all before we get to the, "patina", that your car has.

The MOT running out a month before the ad went live is also going to be a massive turn off. Claiming to have the parts sitting on the shelf for a simple that is allegedly the only barrier between it and a MOT certificate, but for some inexplicable reason not having the work done is even more off putting IMO. Even if you can't get the work done yourself, a failure sheet in hand specifying only the exhaust gaskets as a reason for failure makes that car a LOT more attractive.

Unfortunately even with a full mot, 600 may be pushing it. There are more than a handful of objectively tidier looking GS300s currently listed or recently completed on ebay that just about around that sort of money with fairly long MOTs. Primarily MK2s, granted, but to 99.999% of potential GS buyers, a car potentially only two years younger and much more modern looking/feeling is going to be a bonus, rather than a detractor. And if you must have a MK1, a few hundred pounds more (at least what would have to be spent on a wheel refurb and sorting out the rusty wing) puts you into the top end of the market, if you ignore the jokers asking 5k for a Sport.

I genuinely don't mean to be rude, just trying to give some advice. Best of luck with the sale.

Edited by 279 on Saturday 1st April 22:11