Suggestions rqd - Cleaner suspected of beating off in house.

[scorp]

darth dave said:

I suppose she leaves her dresses and high heels and handbags in your closet too - just in case she's around at the weekends?

[B17NNS]

Gazboy said:

Why not just have a sick day, go out, and sneak in- be careful though, if you get rumbled, she could have you on a serious sexual perversion charge of some sorts???

doubt it. he walks into his own house to find his employee cracking one off whilst she was supposed to be working?

[blindswelledrat]

anonymous said:

[redacted]

[ZR1cliff]

anonymous said:

[redacted]

[darth dave]

anonymous said:

[redacted]

Maybe's it's listed in their terms and conditions as a perk of the job?

i.e.

1. Help yourself to cleaning equipment.
2. Free naughty maid outfit.
3. You may, once per visit, crack one off at the wrist, as long as you don't leave any fishy door handles.

[Plotloss]

Thats it!

It has to be.

Leave a french maids outfit, a camcorder and a note that reads:

If you're going to have a joe jack bonanza on my time, do the decent thing and record it would you love?

[chim_knee]

Superb thread!! But this is the winner so far!

Plotloss said:

Just be in the lounge or kitchen with a can of beans and perhaps a subbuteo table. When she asks what you are doing, you can then retort, well, you tell me...

[love machine]

I thought it was a "he" and the evidence was probably a "Bachelors Boomerang" (sock).

If the very attractive girl is flicking her bean, it would be criminal not to get some evidence.

Not just your wishful thinking?

[Cotty]

anonymous said:

[redacted]

I think he knows what she thinks of his contract and where he can stick it

[tigertiger]

406tm said:

Are you sure your not being Polaroid

Doh, just read rest of thread, 'beaten' to it..

>> Edited by tigertiger on Friday 16th December 16:00

[hugoagogo]

Carrera2 said:

ZR1cliff said: We need more details,what does she look like,who does she look like,how bigs the wardrobes. Ime imagineing dark skinned,spanish,fine Oak,brass hinges Are you a wardrobeaphile?

he is, but he's.....wait for it.....IN THE CLOSET!!!!


/coat

[Cyberhuss]

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[Raify]

Funniest. thread. ever.

[ZR1cliff]

satch said:

cyberhuss, we're worried about you now.

Ive just popped out of the closet ,to check out these kits.

Damn thats serious "bunny boiling shit",mind you ive heard of jealous birds sniffing their mans pants

[blindswelledrat]

Cyberhuss- did I miss the lesson in biology where a woman can bolt man-seed?
Clever bitches.

[Carrera2]

Cyberhuss said:

You need to buy a "Check Mate Semen Detection Kit" Features: • Detects invisible semen stains • Quck, easy and affordable • Laboratory proven results in a home test • Accurate results in 5 minutes or less • Discreet and confidential • Easy to follow instructions • Test 10 items with each kit Do you suffer from the nightmare of suspicion and doubt caused by the infidelity of a cheating cleaner? Find out what's really going on the quick and easy way with the Infidelity Test Kit™ from CheckMate. • More info here - www.getcheckmate.com/ • You also can buy it from these stores, www.spysupplystore.com/testing.html www.uspystore.com/product.phtml?productid=305 www.divorceprep.com/html/get_checkmate.html www.crimescene.com/store/index.php?main_page=product_info&zenid=79f4c909ced34d157d074a69eb4f8da1&products_id=67 • More expensive professional Kit www.crimescene.com/store/index.php?main_page=product_info&products_id=120

If she produced semen we wouldn't be having this discussion - I'd have sacked her for wearing testicles to work.

[tomtom]

I take a nice, relaxing 3 hour lunch break and come back to find I've missed this.

(Now I know how C2 feels )

[Cyberhuss]

Just try it, im sure you will find something

[Cyberhuss]

blindswelledrat said:

Cyberhuss- did I miss the lesson in biology where a woman can bolt man-seed? Clever bitches.

Didn't he say she had a boyfriend? and if shes tossing herself off during work she'd be him within the 3 day period needed for the test to work

[tomtom]

Cyberhuss said:

Didn't he say she had a boyfriend? and if shes tossing herself off during work she'd be him within the 3 day period needed for the test to work

Depends if he retreats to safe ground before the artillery fires, if the cover's even been removed from the cannon.

Or maybe he's not supplying the regular service requirements and she's having to do it by hand...

>> Edited by tomtom on Friday 16th December 16:32