Anyone post 35 and childless
Discussion
Being 35 or thereabouts is no biggie when it comes to having children, but you're another ten+ years older than that. Realistically you'll be knocking on the door of being 50 by the time you meet the "right" girl and decide that babies are the future.
That's quite some difference to being mid-thirties. Some things are more advantageous being that age, some not so much.
I'm 48 and my daughter will be 23 in a couple of months. The thought of having to do the whole baby thing again isn't particularly appealing despite me really enjoying it at the time. These days my girl is a grown up young woman with friends of a similar age and that means we are able to do adult things together rather than me trying not to look like a granddad doing the school run.
That's quite some difference to being mid-thirties. Some things are more advantageous being that age, some not so much.
I'm 48 and my daughter will be 23 in a couple of months. The thought of having to do the whole baby thing again isn't particularly appealing despite me really enjoying it at the time. These days my girl is a grown up young woman with friends of a similar age and that means we are able to do adult things together rather than me trying not to look like a granddad doing the school run.
Chris7865677 said:
andy-xr said:
You the guy who's still hung up on the ex from 30 years ago arent you?
What gives?
What gives?
Yes I am. Well remembered
To give you mine, I spent my 20s following jobs and money. They both went a bit to st and in hindsight I wasted my time on some of them when I could have been growing friendships and relationships. As a result I had casual relationships until I was probably 32, when I met a girl I was I think, probably in love with. That didnt last, though not for wanting on my side. I was thinking settle down, she was thinking go out and see the world and didnt want to be tied down.
I spent a couple of years after that in some kind of abusive relationship hoping that things would get better, but after a while realised it never would and this wasnt the person I'd spend the rest of my life with. After that I met my now wife. We've been married 3 years and expecting our first. I'm late 30s.
I wish in some ways that we'd met earlier in life, say when I was 23/24 but I was a bit of a dhead in my 20s and probably not that ready for what I've got now. Also, she'd have been in her early teens which isnt particularly cool. It's taken me til i was about 35 to find out who I am and what I actually wanted, because I was being blown around by the winds a lot and didnt realise.
I think there's some kind of stigma from being in your 40s and doing the school run with early/mid 20's Mums and Dads, but I dont think it's a particularly big issue. It's not one that I'm bothered about anyway. My sister had kids early on, and at the kids parties other parents come along to drop their kid off, and sit around on their phones. There's not many that talk to each other, because it's their kids who know each other. I'm somewhere in the middle, I'd probably be pleasant with other parents, but I'm not really looking for new friends there
DaveGoddard said:
I'm 30, have never had a relationship and never want one, never mind children.
Wow that's some achievement! You must be part for the new 'MGTOW' movement. Strapline always makes me laugh, 'No kids, no wife, no troubles in life!'https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Men_Going_Their_Own_...
http://rationalwiki.org/wiki/Men_Going_Their_Own_W...
I'm 44, been married, been widowed, never once wanted kids, and when my wife died I was incredibly thankful that I didn't have any.
I pretty much cannot stand children, so I'm unlikely to ever change my mind on that. Luckily my girlfriend is of the same mind, and older than me so it gets less and less likely that one will happen by accident.
Children are just awful, and something a bit wrong seems to happen to otherwise sane people when they become parents too.
I pretty much cannot stand children, so I'm unlikely to ever change my mind on that. Luckily my girlfriend is of the same mind, and older than me so it gets less and less likely that one will happen by accident.
Children are just awful, and something a bit wrong seems to happen to otherwise sane people when they become parents too.
anonymous said:
[redacted]
This right here is the dream!I'm 26 and I hate kids. My niece is alright I suppose but kids of my own? god no!
All my friends are getting married now and popping out the little bank balance drainers. I'm happy for them don't get me wrong, I can tell it's made them so happy. However, they can't seem to understand it's just not for me.
All I hear is I've not met the right girl or my opinion will change as I get older but it's not budged an inch in the past decade.
They see the joy of bringing up kids, I see it as waving goodbye to that travelling trip of a life time.
43. My wife died in February. We were married in 2004. Neither of us wanted kids. We each would have compromised if the other had really wanted it. Now I don't know if I would - I don't really want teenagers in my late fifties, but then if I were to meet the right person down the line and they already had or really wanted kids, would that be a red line for me? In the case that they already had them, would I want the lifestyle of a parent while having none of my own? Don't know.
GTIAlex said:
How do people cope in relationships where the male doesn't want children but the female desperately does?
Can see that being the case for me in 10 years time and unless something massive changes in my brain, I can't ever see my opinion changing.
You either have them and you adapt, or your other-half finds a new man (or tricks you into fatherhood).Can see that being the case for me in 10 years time and unless something massive changes in my brain, I can't ever see my opinion changing.
HTH!
londonbabe said:
I'm 44, been married, been widowed, never once wanted kids, and when my wife died I was incredibly thankful that I didn't have any.
I pretty much cannot stand children, so I'm unlikely to ever change my mind on that. Luckily my girlfriend is of the same mind, and older than me so it gets less and less likely that one will happen by accident.
Children are just awful, and something a bit wrong seems to happen to otherwise sane people when they become parents too.
Everyone is entitled to their own opinion, but wow, just wow. I'm a 4 month first time Dad and its the best thing I ever did.I pretty much cannot stand children, so I'm unlikely to ever change my mind on that. Luckily my girlfriend is of the same mind, and older than me so it gets less and less likely that one will happen by accident.
Children are just awful, and something a bit wrong seems to happen to otherwise sane people when they become parents too.
AClownsPocket said:
londonbabe said:
I'm 44, been married, been widowed, never once wanted kids, and when my wife died I was incredibly thankful that I didn't have any.
I pretty much cannot stand children, so I'm unlikely to ever change my mind on that. Luckily my girlfriend is of the same mind, and older than me so it gets less and less likely that one will happen by accident.
Children are just awful, and something a bit wrong seems to happen to otherwise sane people when they become parents too.
Everyone is entitled to their own opinion, but wow, just wow. I'm a 4 month first time Dad and its the best thing I ever did.I pretty much cannot stand children, so I'm unlikely to ever change my mind on that. Luckily my girlfriend is of the same mind, and older than me so it gets less and less likely that one will happen by accident.
Children are just awful, and something a bit wrong seems to happen to otherwise sane people when they become parents too.
41 and no kids here, never wanted them from a very young age.
I've been with my partner nearly 13 years, she's the same.
There are too many people in the world already, and two-seater cars are the best ones!
My sister is 48, been with her partner for 32 years, they don't want them either.
I do feel a bit guilty and bad for my parents, though, as I know that they would love to have grandchildren.
I've been with my partner nearly 13 years, she's the same.
There are too many people in the world already, and two-seater cars are the best ones!
My sister is 48, been with her partner for 32 years, they don't want them either.
I do feel a bit guilty and bad for my parents, though, as I know that they would love to have grandchildren.
londonbabe said:
I'm 44, been married, been widowed, never once wanted kids, and when my wife died I was incredibly thankful that I didn't have any.
I pretty much cannot stand children, so I'm unlikely to ever change my mind on that. Luckily my girlfriend is of the same mind, and older than me so it gets less and less likely that one will happen by accident.
Children are just awful, and something a bit wrong seems to happen to otherwise sane people when they become parents too.
I can see the attraction of not having any, but looking at it purely logically they're gonna be bloody handy when I'm old. I also struggle to see the sense in describing them as awful when they're something we've all been. Still, I guess we all have our own desiresI pretty much cannot stand children, so I'm unlikely to ever change my mind on that. Luckily my girlfriend is of the same mind, and older than me so it gets less and less likely that one will happen by accident.
Children are just awful, and something a bit wrong seems to happen to otherwise sane people when they become parents too.
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