Sean Connery Joke Thread (Vol 8)

[Vaud]

marshalla said:

Electric sheep. Yup - it belongs in the geek joke thread.

Doh. Electric sheep. Correct.

[schmunk]

marshalla said:

noell35 said:

If you have to explain it..........

You need to run a blade through it.

Don't be a Dick.

[PoleDriver]

These puns are shear hell!

[JustinF]

well if ewe will keep responding...

[dmitry]

To finish registration please injure a human being or, through inaction, allow a human being to come to harm to prove you're not a robot.

[Vitorio]

dmitry said:

To finish registration please injure a human being or, through inaction, allow a human being to come to harm to prove you're not a robot.

Joke's on you, i had my 1st and 2nd law disabled years ago.

[callmedave]

My mate saw an Apple Store get robbed the other day.

He was a iWitness.

[Nom de ploom]

the only way is tup

[PoleDriver]

Nom de ploom said:

the only way is tup

Oi, ewe! get out!

[Kenty]

An old joke for you...

The joke comes to us from Jean de Conde of Hainaut, born 1275:
A game of truth-telling is being played at court by a Queen and her retinue. A knight is asked by the Queen if he has fathered any children; he is forced to admit that he has not.
The Queen nods in assent, saying "you do not have the look of a man who could please his mistress when you hold her naked in your arms. For your beard is little more than the kind of fuzz that ladies have in certain places, and it is easy to tell from the state of the hay whether the pitchfork is any good."
On his turn, the knight asks "Lady, answer me without deceit. Is there hair between your legs?" When she replies, "none at all", he comments, "Indeed I do believe you, for grass does not grow on a well-beaten path."

[Vaud]

Reddit?

[Evangelion]

The other night I dreamed I was a small island off the south coast, and when I woke up, realised I had wet the bed. I was so worried about this that I went to the doctor to tell him what had happened. But he just told me not to be scilly.

[kowalski655]

Archipelago, rather than small island,surely?

/pedant

[Vipers]

kowalski655 said:

Archipelago, rather than small island,surely?

/pedant

Any relation to Archie Andrews.

[marshalla]

Vipers said:

Any relation to Archie Andrews.

Care to discuss it over a gottle o' geer?

[Kenty]

Vaud said:

Reddit?

Yes

[Doofus]

marshalla said:

Vaud said:

ThunderSpook said:

But Data is not Borg...

The joke is, "do androids dream of robot sheep"

Electric sheep. Yup - it belongs in the geek joke thread.

It doesn't belong anywhere. In what possible way can the graphical representation of the title of a novel be called a 'joke'?


Bring back Vipers, I say.


Insert irrelevant sentence here

[wilfandrowlf]

I just witnessed a crash between a red Lorry and a yellow Lorry.
The policeman attending the accident asked me who's fault it was.....
I said, well,........ It's difficult to say!

[mattdaniels]

wilfandrowlf said:

I just witnessed a crash between a red Lorry and a yellow Lorry.
The policeman attending the accident asked me who's fault it was.....
I said, well,........ It's difficult to say!

I just witnessed a crash between a red boat and a blue boat. Both crews got marooned.

[GAjon]

mattdaniels said:

I just witnessed a crash between a red boat and a blue boat. Both crews got marooned.

I was caught in a crash between a coach load of session musicians and a Lorry carrying instruments, caused a twenty minute jam.