Classic from the Mrs!

[Munter]

I think we are close to this: https://what-if.xkcd.com/12/

...and also this is starting to look like a different thread!

[Nichols84]

My mrs (a fully qualified accountant and very good at her job) thought you could go to Area 51 and watch ufo's take off and land. I laughed for 3 days straight.

[rfisher]

Me; What's that (item in the hall)?
SHMBO; It's one of those things that you bought and put in the garage.
Me; Is it new?
SHMBO; No you bought it a while ago.
Me; I didn't buy that.
SHMBO; Yes you did - it's in the garage.
Me; Stop saying garage. I'm talking about that (item in the hall). Did you buy that?
SHMBO; Buy what?
Me; That (item in the hall).
SHMBO; It's the same as the one you bought.
Me; Yes I know. Did you buy it.
SHMBO; Yes.

We didn't do why. I'm building up to that one. I'm anticipating the Monty Python 'it was a bargain' opening.

[marshalla]

rfisher said:

Me; What's that (item in the hall)?
SHMBO; It's one of those things that you bought and put in the garage.
Me; Is it new?
SHMBO; No you bought it a while ago.
Me; I didn't buy that.
SHMBO; Yes you did - it's in the garage.
Me; Stop saying garage. I'm talking about that (item in the hall). Did you buy that?
SHMBO; Buy what?
Me; That (item in the hall).
SHMBO; It's the same as the one you bought.
Me; Yes I know. Did you buy it.
SHMBO; Yes.

We didn't do why. I'm building up to that one. I'm anticipating the Monty Python 'it was a bargain' opening.

SHMBO = ??

[Bullett]

she hoo must be obeyed?

[SpeckledJim]

Bullett said:

she hoo must be obeyed?

Classic from the Mr.

[Munter]

rfisher said:

Me; What's that (item in the hall)?
SHMBO; It's one of those things that you bought and put in the garage.
Me; Is it new?
SHMBO; No you bought it a while ago.
Me; I didn't buy that.
SHMBO; Yes you did - it's in the garage.
Me; Stop saying garage. I'm talking about that (item in the hall). Did you buy that?
SHMBO; Buy what?
Me; That (item in the hall).
SHMBO; It's the same as the one you bought.
Me; Yes I know. Did you buy it.
SHMBO; Yes.

We didn't do why. I'm building up to that one. I'm anticipating the Monty Python 'it was a bargain' opening.

It wasn't perchance a pair of candle sticks where you had only purchased one?

[rfisher]

marshalla said:

SHMBO = ??

She - he who must be obeyed. But that's another story.
Or a Scottish SWMBO.
Or a typo.

Can't remember what it was, but we already had one in the garage gathering dust.

No takers for the Monty Python shopping sketch?

[woodypup59]

Last night as we watched the ISS fly over, she says

"Why is it so bright, why don't they turn the lights down at night".

[Tyre Tread]

rfisher said:

No takers for the Monty Python shopping sketch?

Hello Mrs Smoker.

Hello Mrs Non smoker.

Been Shopping?

No. I've been shopping

What did you buy?

A piston engine.

What did you buy that for?

It was a bargain.

How do you cook it?

You don't cook it!

Well you can't eat that thing raw...

etc...

[Rosscow]

woodypup59 said:

Last night as we watched the ISS fly over, she says

"Why is it so bright, why don't they turn the lights down at night".

[Vipers]

Having not used my Tom Tom for a year or so, put it on charge. Tapped in a destination, and took it out to the back garden.

OH says "What are you doing"

I said "Waiting until it picks up the satelite signal and plans the route"

She says "It won't work"

"Why" I said.

Answer........ "Because your in the back garden"........... How do their minds work, BTY thank god she doesn't drive.

[Cotty]

I assume she meant because there are no roads in your backgarden.

Or alternatively "turn around now" "walk though the house" "get in your car, turn left"

[Vipers]

Cotty said:

I assume she meant because there are no roads in your backgarden.

Or alternatively "turn around now" "walk though the house" "get in your car, turn left"

The way her mind works, your guess is as good as mine.

[Blown2CV]

Can't remember if I've posted this previously, but mrs 2cv asked upon seeing a road sign, why windsocks were so dangerous

[Moonhawk]

Mrs came home the other day and said that somebody in work had told her that apples were great for diets as they contain something that supresses hunger.

Me: yeh they do........apple.

[SilverSixer]

In the car this morning with the wife and nippers, traffic jam.

Her: Ermergerd, what's that terrible smell??

Me, looking at massive, filthy, full bin lorry 2 feet in front of the car: Pretty obvious, isn't it? *switches vents to recirc

Her: No, it's disgusting, who did it?? Which one of you was it?? *opens window* Ermergerd, it's getting worse!!

Me: Sigh.

[Alapeno]

On watching the David Beckham in the Jungle thing on TV.

Me: "I wonder if they'll actually see a howler monkey..."

Mrs: "are they the ones that make coffee?"

Me: "what?!" "Are you thinking about the PG tips chimps?"

Mrs: "no, you know, the ones that sort that special expensive coffee and st it out"

Turns out she was thinking about civet cats and kopi luwak coffee, a conversation we'd had the week before.

[jbudgie]

Alapeno said:

On watching the David Beckham in the Jungle thing on TV.

Me: "I wonder if they'll actually see a howler monkey..."

Mrs: "are they the ones that make coffee?"

Me: "what?!" "Are you thinking about the PG tips chimps?"

Mrs: "no, you know, the ones that sort that special expensive coffee and st it out"

Turns out she was thinking about civet cats and kopi luwak coffee, a conversation we'd had the week before.

Are you on the right thread here mate ???
Sounds to me as though you are the one making the classic.

[HD Adam]

Paging Mr Whoosh Parrot