Discussion
giblets_ said:
Im really struggling and don't have anywhere to turn to.
Suffered with Anxiety and Depression for well over 10 years now and just recently had my girlfriend of 4 years leave me; I was doing ok with this as I had a feeling it was coming but yesterday I was told she's dating someone else - Less than a month after leaving me. She told me he makes her happy and she enjoys his company. Told me how things ended for her long before she ended the relationship. I've obviously cut all contact now but her words keep replaying in my head and I feel completely sunk. I know it seems trivial to feel this depressed over a break up and that "they happen" but I've never felt in such a dark place in my life. It has really, really rattled me and i can't grasp why. Got no real friends around me either, they just seem to show up in my life when I have a purpose to them - When Im in trouble I get the "you'll be fine" responses.
Just totally alone, and feel so broken. My Sertraline isn't helping either
Having been dumped recently I can sympathise. It takes time and a bit of strength to avoid contact. Replaying it in your head is normal.Suffered with Anxiety and Depression for well over 10 years now and just recently had my girlfriend of 4 years leave me; I was doing ok with this as I had a feeling it was coming but yesterday I was told she's dating someone else - Less than a month after leaving me. She told me he makes her happy and she enjoys his company. Told me how things ended for her long before she ended the relationship. I've obviously cut all contact now but her words keep replaying in my head and I feel completely sunk. I know it seems trivial to feel this depressed over a break up and that "they happen" but I've never felt in such a dark place in my life. It has really, really rattled me and i can't grasp why. Got no real friends around me either, they just seem to show up in my life when I have a purpose to them - When Im in trouble I get the "you'll be fine" responses.
Just totally alone, and feel so broken. My Sertraline isn't helping either
Wacky Racer said:
oobster said:
How is everyone doing? Me, not so great this last week/10 days, having trouble staying asleep at night. I can get to sleep no problem (the Mrs is having a go because I want to go to bed early'ish and she wants to stay up) but I am waking in the middle of the night with work thoughts running through my head at a thousand miles an hour.
That then makes me tired and irritable all through the next day, and so the cycle repeats itself.
Might seem obvious but have you talked to your wife about your problem/s? Don't suffer in silence, there's help out there, even on here.That then makes me tired and irritable all through the next day, and so the cycle repeats itself.
You may not think so now, but you will get better and emerge from the dark tunnel.
Hang on in there.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XiCrniLQGYc
I’m struggling at the moment. Lethargy and hypersomnia followed by being unable to settle. All aspects of my life I would rate as poor/could be better but I feel trapped in finding ways of improving them. I know I need to push through but I just don’t have the energy. Falling into bad habits that aren’t helping. My self loathing is at an all time high and yet I carry on putting the mask on and acting like life is good.
- Ding Ding* Round 10...time to drag myself off the canvas and go on....
This thread is undoublty my best contribution (in a small way) to PH. If it helps people then it’s definitely a good thing. Here is my latest thought on my depression.
https://howfootballruinedmylife.wordpress.com/2017...
https://howfootballruinedmylife.wordpress.com/2017...
wiliferus said:
Just my two-penneth...
I was on sertraline. Main points of note - it worked for my depression. It took the edge off the depth of lows, but with the consequence of also lowering highs. It kind of numbed all my emotions. I just felt ‘meh’ everyday. Couldn’t get excited about anything (even felt ambivalent about seeing my kids
) didn’t feel particularly happy, but also didn’t feel extreme lows, sadness, and notably, also lost all emphathy for other people’s situations.
In the willy dept, quite unexpected results. Made him harder than I’ve ever experienced, proper throbber! Libido was fine... but... very very difficult to climax. My missus at the time equally loved it, and found it quite frustrating
Weight - this was the biggest thing. I’ve always been a slim fella. All my adult life I’ve hovered around 10st 6. In my darkest months I got down to 9st 8 through lack of eating. I looked bloody awful. Sertraline didn’t affect this at all, until I came off it. I then started putting on about 3lbs a week
I ballooned upto 13st 2 which was all on the front and gave me a man belly. I’ve managed to work this down now to 12st 2 and am fairly happy.
Overall, sertraline did what I needed it to do. It gave me a crutch for the period in which I needed it. However due to the numbing of emotions, I don’t think I’d want to be on it for life. I was on it for 14 months, and feel I lost 14 months of my life. That said, without it there’s a real possibility I wouldn’t be here.
Summed up perfectly. Numbs me to highs and lows. Worth noting I discussed going from 100mg to 200mg with my GP who is a specialist in mental health and he said said the side effects would be more pronounced with little benefit.I was on sertraline. Main points of note - it worked for my depression. It took the edge off the depth of lows, but with the consequence of also lowering highs. It kind of numbed all my emotions. I just felt ‘meh’ everyday. Couldn’t get excited about anything (even felt ambivalent about seeing my kids
) didn’t feel particularly happy, but also didn’t feel extreme lows, sadness, and notably, also lost all emphathy for other people’s situations. In the willy dept, quite unexpected results. Made him harder than I’ve ever experienced, proper throbber! Libido was fine... but... very very difficult to climax. My missus at the time equally loved it, and found it quite frustrating
Weight - this was the biggest thing. I’ve always been a slim fella. All my adult life I’ve hovered around 10st 6. In my darkest months I got down to 9st 8 through lack of eating. I looked bloody awful. Sertraline didn’t affect this at all, until I came off it. I then started putting on about 3lbs a week
I ballooned upto 13st 2 which was all on the front and gave me a man belly. I’ve managed to work this down now to 12st 2 and am fairly happy.Overall, sertraline did what I needed it to do. It gave me a crutch for the period in which I needed it. However due to the numbing of emotions, I don’t think I’d want to be on it for life. I was on it for 14 months, and feel I lost 14 months of my life. That said, without it there’s a real possibility I wouldn’t be here.
Edited by wiliferus on Friday 8th December 06:51
aaron_2000 said:
FocusRS3 said:
Aaron, simply because i dont understand can you explain why you are years from getting some help?
For me this was never part of the script of my life but here i am and so i think the best way is to get some help.
Thankfully mens mental health is taken seriously now.
All the best
Simply because I don't feel ready/bad enough to go to somebody yet, I imagine as I have more and more in my life to deal with in the coming years that'll change. For me this was never part of the script of my life but here i am and so i think the best way is to get some help.
Thankfully mens mental health is taken seriously now.
All the best
aaron_2000 said:
Ruskie said:
aaron_2000 said:
FocusRS3 said:
Aaron, simply because i dont understand can you explain why you are years from getting some help?
For me this was never part of the script of my life but here i am and so i think the best way is to get some help.
Thankfully mens mental health is taken seriously now.
All the best
Simply because I don't feel ready/bad enough to go to somebody yet, I imagine as I have more and more in my life to deal with in the coming years that'll change. For me this was never part of the script of my life but here i am and so i think the best way is to get some help.
Thankfully mens mental health is taken seriously now.
All the best
Balmoral said:
I went to the Nottingham IKEA off the A610 dual carriageway yesterday morning, on the way home, there was a man on the bridge over the A610 near the Eastwood junction. As I spotted him, poised above L1, I moved from L1 to L2 to avoid him, noted the truck behind me in L1, and I thought the worst was about to happen. There was a lay-by up ahead and several cars had stopped, a number of people were on their phones and several people were running back to the bridge. By the time I had processed all this and considered whether I could or should stop too, I was past the junction and not able to easily do so. I don't know what happened next, I haven't found anything on the local news feeds.
It happens a lot. It’s nearly a daily occurrence in my work to go for someone with suicidal thoughts, people who have self harmed and who have actually attempted to take their own life. The irony of me comforting them and empathising isn’t lost on me.227bhp said:
Ruskie said:
It happens a lot. It’s nearly a daily occurrence in my work to go for someone with suicidal thoughts, people who have self harmed and who have actually attempted to take their own life. The irony of me comforting them and empathising isn’t lost on me.
What is 'to go for someone'?Do you work in mental health?
I'm not surprised you're depressed if you work with that almost daily.
DomesticM said:
Hi guys, not sure if this is the right to put this but I'm not sure if this comes under depression or another mental health issue.
A family member has fallen ill and is unable to look after their dog so we took him in about 10 months ago. My mum (who has been single for about 22 years) is now the official owner but gradually her relationship with the dog has got worse and worse and now it's worrying. She takes the dog everywhere with her, even when she's in the bath. He's always on the sofa with her and always in bed with her at night, and she doesn't stop talking to him - she even talks to him more than both me and my other half put together. She's always walking around having full on conversations with him in different accents which is really weird. She's now completely neglected her social life (which was scarce before the dog came along) and now won't go out because "the dog can't be on his own "what if he needs a wee", "He can't be left alone, what is there's a fire?". I can't even get her to go on a short holiday with us for the weekend because of the dog. Every conversation she mentions him and it's getting worrying. She's even starting kissing him.
I'm not very clued up on depression but does this sound like it could be something similar? She's in complete denial about this and refuses to talk about it and storms off. I don't really know where else to look for advice other than Pistonheads.
Sounds more like Alzheimer’s or demetia?A family member has fallen ill and is unable to look after their dog so we took him in about 10 months ago. My mum (who has been single for about 22 years) is now the official owner but gradually her relationship with the dog has got worse and worse and now it's worrying. She takes the dog everywhere with her, even when she's in the bath. He's always on the sofa with her and always in bed with her at night, and she doesn't stop talking to him - she even talks to him more than both me and my other half put together. She's always walking around having full on conversations with him in different accents which is really weird. She's now completely neglected her social life (which was scarce before the dog came along) and now won't go out because "the dog can't be on his own "what if he needs a wee", "He can't be left alone, what is there's a fire?". I can't even get her to go on a short holiday with us for the weekend because of the dog. Every conversation she mentions him and it's getting worrying. She's even starting kissing him.
I'm not very clued up on depression but does this sound like it could be something similar? She's in complete denial about this and refuses to talk about it and storms off. I don't really know where else to look for advice other than Pistonheads.
DomesticM said:
Ruskie said:
Sounds more like Alzheimer’s or demetia?
I hope not, but I'm not entirely sure what early signs of those are.oldbanger said:
Or depression/loneliness coupled with a bit of OCD.
If you’re going to help her come out of it you may need to help her to cultivate links with dog clubs or other owners.
Ultimately though, if she’s on her own and very lonely, dogs offer unconditional affection and regard, and they can be there 24/7 in a way that human friends or family often can’t.
That's the thing, she's insistent that all dog owners do all of the mentioned. She just doesn't want to go out, let alone socialising with other people. If you’re going to help her come out of it you may need to help her to cultivate links with dog clubs or other owners.
Ultimately though, if she’s on her own and very lonely, dogs offer unconditional affection and regard, and they can be there 24/7 in a way that human friends or family often can’t.
Super Slo Mo said:
On the subject of diet, a bag of crisps a day is a stones’s worth of empty calories in a 12 month period. Now, I know it doesn’t follow that if you cut out crisps you will lose a stone in a year, but it helped me to get a bit of perspective to look at them in this way.
Also, this year I have attempted to eat a vegan diet, for health rather than moral reasons.
Historically when I have lost weight I have struggled with cravings for sugar, fat, salt etc, but with this change of diet I haven’t.
I load up with as much fruit and veg as I can get down my neck, and somehow have pretty much had no cravings at all, and am losing weight. I also only eat proper bread, so grain, spelt, whole meal etc. None of this white processed crap.
Cutting out dairy is hard though, especially when I live out of hotels for much of the week. I’m not 100% vegan, as I will eat what’s put in front of me when I visit family (who generally don’t get the concept of not eating meat etc).
And, I’ve had no relapses into depression, although there is another reason for that too, we had our first baby in November and it made a big difference to me on a psychological level.
Not that I am recommending having a baby, just that it was a strong trigger for me, I don’t know why.
To summarise though, definitely change your diet. You need to find out what works for you, I am just testifying as to what has worked for me.
I have been vegan for a couple of months now. I did a month at first and lost a stone in weight without trying. Had a break and a think about it and I’m going full time now. I have chosen to do it for health reasons first and foremost. Animal welfare bothers me as the impact on the planet.Also, this year I have attempted to eat a vegan diet, for health rather than moral reasons.
Historically when I have lost weight I have struggled with cravings for sugar, fat, salt etc, but with this change of diet I haven’t.
I load up with as much fruit and veg as I can get down my neck, and somehow have pretty much had no cravings at all, and am losing weight. I also only eat proper bread, so grain, spelt, whole meal etc. None of this white processed crap.
Cutting out dairy is hard though, especially when I live out of hotels for much of the week. I’m not 100% vegan, as I will eat what’s put in front of me when I visit family (who generally don’t get the concept of not eating meat etc).
And, I’ve had no relapses into depression, although there is another reason for that too, we had our first baby in November and it made a big difference to me on a psychological level.
Not that I am recommending having a baby, just that it was a strong trigger for me, I don’t know why.
To summarise though, definitely change your diet. You need to find out what works for you, I am just testifying as to what has worked for me.
I feel like I have tons more energy and I’m no where near as sluggish. If you need inspiration than Cowspiracy is a good watch.
Be prepared for loads of opinion on your life choice, ranging from disbelief to outright abuse.
Is it helping my depression? Time will tell.
RP64 said:
Has anyone else suffered with ongoing depression which has maybe eased but never really gone away. When I was 19 at university I had crippling depression, really terrible and I couldn't think about much else. It had a real effect on every aspect of life and at the time I was on antidepressants and saw a talking therapist. After a couple of years things had mostly eased off so I stopped antidepressants and finished my degree. Years down the line I have a high paying job (but very stressful and time consuming). I'm still single but generally life is pretty good, I don't have any physical health problems, I'm able to take several foreign holidays a year and visit friends and family fairly often (although I do live in a different part of the country).
Nowadays I'm not so depressed I can't get on with life but it's always there. I'm always low level miserable and never quite satisfied. Do other people get this? People who've had depression and "gotten over" it, does it ever really go or like me is it just not as bad as it was?
Yeah mine never really goes. I doubt it ever will. If I get complacent it hits me like a ton of bricks.Nowadays I'm not so depressed I can't get on with life but it's always there. I'm always low level miserable and never quite satisfied. Do other people get this? People who've had depression and "gotten over" it, does it ever really go or like me is it just not as bad as it was?
xjay1337 said:
Since we are asking questions
- Does anyone notice any odd side effects with their meds such as perhaps not caring as much what they say, or not realising?
I've always spoken faster than my brain can react, but I feel that over the last 12 months while I have been on the Prozac (daily 20mg) that I am...uh.. "more autistic" ?
As in, I care less about the consequences of what I say. Generally I feel pretty dead inside, yeah sure I don't feel "depressed" as such but I never feel happy, at the same times thing that should make me sad don't tend to bother me....I just feel something is wrong.
On Sertraline I felt completely numb. No highs and no lows. Middle of the road numb but that is what the drug is designed to do. It helped me at the time but I got sick of apathy to happy events.- Does anyone notice any odd side effects with their meds such as perhaps not caring as much what they say, or not realising?
I've always spoken faster than my brain can react, but I feel that over the last 12 months while I have been on the Prozac (daily 20mg) that I am...uh.. "more autistic" ?
As in, I care less about the consequences of what I say. Generally I feel pretty dead inside, yeah sure I don't feel "depressed" as such but I never feel happy, at the same times thing that should make me sad don't tend to bother me....I just feel something is wrong.
hooblah said:
I'm not quite sure if I'm depressed or have other psychological issues. I haven't really talked about this with anyone to great depth. I've spoken to close friends, but not in full detail as I don't want to scare them. I can't really ask for their advice as none of them feel or have felt like I do. I don't know anyone who has. A friend did mention that I might have depression, so here I am.
I've been out of a job for almost a year now, mainly because I didnt like my job, and I wanted to take time out to think about a new career path. I wanted to find something I don't mind doing on a daily basis. But the reality is, work just doesn't appeal to me. I'm lazy by nature and I've become lazier. I often think about life and existence and wonder if it's just easier being dead. What's the point in existing if all you do is slave away so you can exist?
Nothing seems to motivate me anymore. The only way I will do something is if a deadline is looming and there are consequences that come with not doing it. I've become apathetic and the thought of being like this forever scares me. I could write an essay on this but I wont. I'm not sure what to do about it.
Feelings of hopelessness and lacking motivation to work and both signs of depression. I’m miserable at work but I have to keep plowing on and looking for new opportunities. I often feel like you do and wonder what is the point? Is this it?I've been out of a job for almost a year now, mainly because I didnt like my job, and I wanted to take time out to think about a new career path. I wanted to find something I don't mind doing on a daily basis. But the reality is, work just doesn't appeal to me. I'm lazy by nature and I've become lazier. I often think about life and existence and wonder if it's just easier being dead. What's the point in existing if all you do is slave away so you can exist?
Nothing seems to motivate me anymore. The only way I will do something is if a deadline is looming and there are consequences that come with not doing it. I've become apathetic and the thought of being like this forever scares me. I could write an essay on this but I wont. I'm not sure what to do about it.
Gassing Station | Health Matters | Top of Page | What's New | My Stuff