Really depressed
Discussion
Like I said Rob, because he wants to help. He may have done a bad job but he wants to help like all of us. Please try to put it out of your mind.
What's your favourite movie or music - something that always makes you laugh?
Why not put it on quietly and lie down & try and get some sleep?
What's your favourite movie or music - something that always makes you laugh?
Why not put it on quietly and lie down & try and get some sleep?
skahigh said:
Robster, get some photos out of your kids, look at their faces and try to imagine what it would be like for them to grow up without their daddy.
They need you and they love you.
Nights are the loneliest times but you are not alone, there are hundreds of people on PH that want to talk and help you out.
You are not alone.
If you're drinking, don't. If you're not, don't start. It will only make things worse. Have a shower, get yourself to bed and stick the radio or TV on that will give you something to think about.
Get some sleep and see what tomorrow brings, the sun will come up and things will get better.
^ this.They need you and they love you.
Nights are the loneliest times but you are not alone, there are hundreds of people on PH that want to talk and help you out.
You are not alone.
If you're drinking, don't. If you're not, don't start. It will only make things worse. Have a shower, get yourself to bed and stick the radio or TV on that will give you something to think about.
Get some sleep and see what tomorrow brings, the sun will come up and things will get better.
Please do this.
Ring the Samaritans if you need to talk to someone. Interacting with a real person on the phone will help.
227bhp said:
You could always take some MTFU tablets, pull yourself together, stop being an attention w
e and try to help yourself.
Being depressed doesn't mean you can't look after your own kids for a few hours, you're trying it on mate.
You've been offered help and not accepted any.
Sit down and watch this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r_2kelqYz_o
There is only one person who is going to drag you out of this hole and it's you, accept help when it's offered, go and see your doctor.
Don't tell me I don't know what it's all about either, I do, i've been there.
Not remotely helpful. There's always one.e and try to help yourself.Being depressed doesn't mean you can't look after your own kids for a few hours, you're trying it on mate.
You've been offered help and not accepted any.
Sit down and watch this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r_2kelqYz_o
There is only one person who is going to drag you out of this hole and it's you, accept help when it's offered, go and see your doctor.
Don't tell me I don't know what it's all about either, I do, i've been there.
Robster said:
I get that , and I will , but the other stuff has really really knocked me down, I can't mtfu , making excuses to see my kids , fk no they are the only reason I'm here now I can't see them, doesn't leave much
Don;t get upset over what one poster said. Being charitable I'm sure he meant well but that kind of attitude is of little value when you're feeling as low as you are.k no they are the only reason I'm here now I can't see them, doesn't leave much Of course you can't 'mtfu'. If it was as easy as that nobody would ever have these sort of issues.
One thing worth noting is that you are absolutely now not alone in this, as there are loads of on here watching what's happening and rooting for you. So you have to pull through this now, for all of on here.
Make tomorrow the day your recovery starts. Small steps.
You can get through this, you just need a little help. Please try getting medical help for your kids.
Call the Samaritans or your local crisis team http://www.sabp.nhs.uk/advice/crisis-help
Call the Samaritans or your local crisis team http://www.sabp.nhs.uk/advice/crisis-help
Robster said:
I was told to man the fk up, can't do that so I failed
One person on a forum said that. He's wrong. You can't do that. I know, most of us in this thread know.k up, can't do that so I failed Stop dwelling on that and focus on what you CAN do.
What are your children supposed to do if you kill yourself?
"How's your Dad?"
"My dad killed himself last year"
You can't give them that as your legacy. You cannot 'man the f
k up', nobody in your position can, but you can fight on and get through this. And you must. Someone like me, yeah, I'm single with no children, I could top myself tomorrow and few would even notice. You don't have that luxury as you have children, you have to carry on.
A post I made 6 years ago
I have watched his parents age well before their time, it has completely destroyed them. Being Pete's best mate they view me as their surrogate son.
I join his parents every year for dinner on what would be his birthday, we take flowers to his grave on all significant days, and every year I see them crumble a bit more.
Robster - Please talk to a Doctor, seek help, there is light at the end of that tunnel!
If you end it - Your KIDS, Your family and friends have got to live with it. Trust me, it ain't easy
It has had such an impact on my life - given the chance I would punch him square on the jaw for putting his parents through this, at the same time I would love the opportunity to give him a great big man hug and tell him that it would have all looked different in the morning.
All these years on and I still have never been able to admit to Petes parents that I ignored the phone
Pagey said:
A very very good friend of mine - In fact he was my best mate, we had served and worked together for years and had been in some bad situations together, cue normal married life for Pete, he met and married a gorgeous girl (I was proud to be his best man) and they had a lovely baby boy.
We stayed best mates, I was always round the flat and was god parent to young Jake. Pete doted on Jake, he could be a big rough tough guy at work but when it came to his son he was a big softie.
Pete took Clare and Jake to visit his parents one weekend, driving home they were involved in an accident. Pete was badly hurt, Clare and Jake were both killed.
Without going into the finer details Pete blamed himself, he was tired, should have stopped for a break, if he had stopped for a break......................
I was the one Pete turned to, he was a broken man. I helped with funeral arrangements, stood with him as he buried his wife and son - one of the worst days of my life
Pete wished he had died with them, then he wouldnt feel so guilty, lonely etc
I was always there for him as a shoulder to cry on, someone to talk to - sometimes not in person, if work took me away he knew he could call me at anytime, I would always answer even if it was to say I can't talk right now, I will call you back ASAP.
As time moved on, round came his wedding anniversary (I knew it was coming and made sure I was around for him) he hit the bottle quite hard for a while and I would get drunken phone calls, and I would always drop what I was doing and go sort him out.
I got to know his neighbours, as they would see me quite a lot taking him food etc when he was on a bad week. I took the girl from upstairs out for dinner and drinks and spent a bit of time with her. Sadly this clouded my judgement, Pete was on a downward spiral he constantly blamed himself for what happened, I tried my best to get him to go for councilling but he refused point blank.
I took his neighbour out one night, and Pete called me, for once I didn't answer, I was sidetracked, Pete tried calling me again later that evening and again I didnt answer, as the lady concerned looked at me and said leave it when my phone rang. I missed a third call from Pete that evening (I never heard the phone ring the third time)
Pete ended his life that evening, and I was no more than 40 feet away from him and I didn't pick up the phone I listened to his voice mail the next morning.......................
I could never admit to his parents that I ignored the phone
As the years tick by, I still think about Pete and what could be if I had acted differently. One night, a different decision could have made a world of difference..... We stayed best mates, I was always round the flat and was god parent to young Jake. Pete doted on Jake, he could be a big rough tough guy at work but when it came to his son he was a big softie.
Pete took Clare and Jake to visit his parents one weekend, driving home they were involved in an accident. Pete was badly hurt, Clare and Jake were both killed.
Without going into the finer details Pete blamed himself, he was tired, should have stopped for a break, if he had stopped for a break......................
I was the one Pete turned to, he was a broken man. I helped with funeral arrangements, stood with him as he buried his wife and son - one of the worst days of my life
Pete wished he had died with them, then he wouldnt feel so guilty, lonely etc
I was always there for him as a shoulder to cry on, someone to talk to - sometimes not in person, if work took me away he knew he could call me at anytime, I would always answer even if it was to say I can't talk right now, I will call you back ASAP.
As time moved on, round came his wedding anniversary (I knew it was coming and made sure I was around for him) he hit the bottle quite hard for a while and I would get drunken phone calls, and I would always drop what I was doing and go sort him out.
I got to know his neighbours, as they would see me quite a lot taking him food etc when he was on a bad week. I took the girl from upstairs out for dinner and drinks and spent a bit of time with her. Sadly this clouded my judgement, Pete was on a downward spiral he constantly blamed himself for what happened, I tried my best to get him to go for councilling but he refused point blank.
I took his neighbour out one night, and Pete called me, for once I didn't answer, I was sidetracked, Pete tried calling me again later that evening and again I didnt answer, as the lady concerned looked at me and said leave it when my phone rang. I missed a third call from Pete that evening (I never heard the phone ring the third time)
Pete ended his life that evening, and I was no more than 40 feet away from him and I didn't pick up the phone
I listened to his voice mail the next morning.......................I could never admit to his parents that I ignored the phone
I have watched his parents age well before their time, it has completely destroyed them. Being Pete's best mate they view me as their surrogate son.
I join his parents every year for dinner on what would be his birthday, we take flowers to his grave on all significant days, and every year I see them crumble a bit more.
Robster - Please talk to a Doctor, seek help, there is light at the end of that tunnel!
If you end it - Your KIDS, Your family and friends have got to live with it. Trust me, it ain't easy It has had such an impact on my life - given the chance I would punch him square on the jaw for putting his parents through this, at the same time I would love the opportunity to give him a great big man hug and tell him that it would have all looked different in the morning.
All these years on and I still have never been able to admit to Petes parents that I ignored the phone
Edited by Pagey on Monday 19th September 02:06
I'm glad things turned out well, I saw your thread after the night shift yesterday morning and was glad when i woke up and things had worked out well.
I not a fan of posting about my stuff but had my own problems for a long time in my life and agree it is so easy to give in and can feel like climbing Everest to find that one thing to keep you going.
But remember even one glimmer of hope is good enough and really try to look to the future. And be truthful to yourself as well, this is important as it keeps you level, about who you are and what you are.
I not a fan of posting about my stuff but had my own problems for a long time in my life and agree it is so easy to give in and can feel like climbing Everest to find that one thing to keep you going.
But remember even one glimmer of hope is good enough and really try to look to the future. And be truthful to yourself as well, this is important as it keeps you level, about who you are and what you are.
Edited by The Spruce goose on Monday 19th September 02:17
Is someone available for you tonight Rob? if some of the guys on here gave you their number im sure they'd be more than happy if you need to talk to someone at the moment.
Nightime is always the hardest when you're depressed.
And don't be daft, you've not failed, you just need to get through a stty time in your life (which you will).
Nightime is always the hardest when you're depressed.
And don't be daft, you've not failed, you just need to get through a s
tty time in your life (which you will).Gassing Station | Health Matters | Top of Page | What's New | My Stuff