Mr. James May 'keeps it real'

[Ray Luxury-Yacht]

anonymous said:

[redacted]

Looks like he's pissed. He won't remember me in the morning. Typical.

[Soovy]

Ray Luxury-Yacht said:

Oy, knock it off with the smut about Lucy. She's not here to defend herself, so, er, I gotta do it on her behalf in a chivalrous way, and that.

So...just bugger off, she's mine godammit!

Seriously, you know Pinder? Tell her that Uncle Soovy has a special place in his games room for her.......

Edited by Soovy on Friday 8th October 16:51

[wolves_wanderer]

Mike Tyson came into work (Lidl of all places) to stock up on veggie food. Really nice bloke, stopped for a chat got a photo and an autograph. I also still have both my ears

[anonymous-user]

anonymous said:

[redacted]

I was at lunch with him, I'll be out drinking with him after work too, I'll put in a good word for you if you want

[Greenwich Ross]

anonymous said:

[redacted]

You seem to be spending rather a lot of time with me. Are you good with colours, perchance, Iain Keyser Soze?

[cml]

Greenwich Ross said:

cml said:

Keith Chegwin

I cannot believe Keith Chegwin is the most mentioned 'celebrity' in this thread. He really must put himself about.

There is something about the about people from the TV of our childhhood that makes them extra special.

Espeically if they then go on to get completely smashed and do naked quiz shows.

On topic:

I was working late in a fish and chip shop when Terry Scott came in for chips and fishcake, complaining that they didn't feed him properly at the theatre.

Bloke+chips=real

[Ray Luxury-Yacht]

Soovy said:

Ray Luxury-Yacht said:

Oy, knock it off with the smut about Lucy. She's not here to defend herself, so, er, I gotta do it on her behalf in a chivalrous way, and that.

So...just bugger off, she's mine godammit!

Seriously, you know Pinder? Tell her that Uncle Soovy has a special place in his games room for her.......

Edited by Soovy on Friday 8th October 16:51

Quality

Yep seriously, I know the Pinder. She comes in and uses my sunbeds, although I'm not sure if I've let out a trade secrety there or what...

[Soovy]

Ray Luxury-Yacht said:

Soovy said:

Ray Luxury-Yacht said:

Oy, knock it off with the smut about Lucy. She's not here to defend herself, so, er, I gotta do it on her behalf in a chivalrous way, and that.

So...just bugger off, she's mine godammit!

Seriously, you know Pinder? Tell her that Uncle Soovy has a special place in his games room for her.......

Edited by Soovy on Friday 8th October 16:51

Quality

Yep seriously, I know the Pinder. She comes in and uses my sunbeds, although I'm not sure if I've let out a trade secrety there or what...

You fkING WHAT?

Pinder comes into your premises, GETS NAKED and you didn't TELL ME?!

[monthefish]

Soovy said:

Ray Luxury-Yacht said:

Lucy Pinder comes into my salon. She's really lovely.

I'd like to come into her salon.....

[TotalControl]

Soovy said:

Ray Luxury-Yacht said:

Soovy said:

Ray Luxury-Yacht said:

Oy, knock it off with the smut about Lucy. She's not here to defend herself, so, er, I gotta do it on her behalf in a chivalrous way, and that.

So...just bugger off, she's mine godammit!

Seriously, you know Pinder? Tell her that Uncle Soovy has a special place in his games room for her.......

Edited by Soovy on Friday 8th October 16:51

Quality

Yep seriously, I know the Pinder. She comes in and uses my sunbeds, although I'm not sure if I've let out a trade secrety there or what...

You fkING WHAT?

Pinder comes into your premises, GETS NAKED and you didn't TELL ME?!

Why should he? Poor guy, he's probably too tired from all the mass wking sessions.

[Ray Luxury-Yacht]

Soovy said:

Ray Luxury-Yacht said:

Soovy said:

Ray Luxury-Yacht said:

Oy, knock it off with the smut about Lucy. She's not here to defend herself, so, er, I gotta do it on her behalf in a chivalrous way, and that.

So...just bugger off, she's mine godammit!

Seriously, you know Pinder? Tell her that Uncle Soovy has a special place in his games room for her.......

Edited by Soovy on Friday 8th October 16:51

Quality

Yep seriously, I know the Pinder. She comes in and uses my sunbeds, although I'm not sure if I've let out a trade secrety there or what...

You fkING WHAT?

Pinder comes into your premises, GETS NAKED and you didn't TELL ME?!

Sorry Soov, I would have said if I knew how fanatically you wish to stalk her what a big fan you were.

It is a treat I must say. My sunbeds are stand up cabinets and there are many friends of mine who would pay good money for me to fit cctv in there

Anyway enough. She's a valued client and I'm saying no more!

[Acehood]

Greenwich Ross said:

monthefish said:

Greenwich Ross said:

Was walking down King Street in Hammersmith last night (with Greenwich Sarah) and who was coming the other way? Why, it was popular motoring journalist Mr. James "Captain Slow" May (eyes down, looking shifty; trying to avoid being recognised, I guess. You failed, Mr May. You failed). Anyhoo, I knew he lived in Hammersmith a while back but hadn't realised he still did. Presumably he was popping out to buy a pint of bitter, a badly packed kebab or heading to TK Maxx to buy a new jumper.

So, you can take your Chipping Sodomy (or wherever the other two live), London is the place to be. Unless you need to drive anywhere in a hurry. Or buy an affordable house. Or not die of stress.

Have you got any other stories of motoring related celebrities 'keeping it real'?

He 'kept it real' by "walking down King Street in Hammersmith"?

There must be more to the anecdote than that surely?

...and he was on fire whilst juggling midgets."

No, i'm afraid that's it. It was more related to him still living in Hammersmith despite his fame and/or fortune.

Apologies, but these austerity measures have hit my seasoned raconteuring hard.

Edited by Greenwich Ross on Friday 8th October 10:48

Someone has their thesaurus out today.

[Sneaky Schnell]

I was in a club one night when a starstruck mate of mine was trying to strike up a friendship with Robbie Williams. My mate Philip and I wanted to go somewhere else but Barry couldn't be pulled away from Mr. Williams.

Barry said to Phil, "I'm talking to Robbie Williams mate. Let's stay here", or something to that effect.

Philip who has no time for celebs or brown-nosing mates looks at Barry in disgust, turns to Robbie, looks him in the eye and says, "do you know what mate, i have to say, you're the spitting image of him" and walked away. Barry was too embarrassed to stay.

[Dunk76]

I once got to sit next to Claire Sweeney on an aeroplane. For an hour and a half. The 6pm BA commuter bus back from Glasgow, without any entourage or baying fans. That's keeping it real, yeah.

Actually reasonably pleasant company it must be said...

And yes, I did try.

[Police State]

Soovy said:

Cleo Rocos is my next door neighbor.



You wood.

Has she still got the louche Toy(ish) boy who carries her shopping bags back from the supermarket?...

btw: I definately would; she looks even better in the real...

[john2443]

Driving down the M40 15+ years ago we were in lane 2 when a complete tw*t ( can't rememebr the car - Jag? Merc?) in front of us slowed down next to a blond in lane 1. I hit the horn and headlights, moved out to overtake and as I went past realised it was Clarkson!

[Wills2]

I met David Coultard at the 2009 British GP, but as we were guests of Redbull and in the Redbull pitlane garage he wasn't exactly keeping it real or a surprise to see him there...

Once got into a lift to find Jasper Carrot skulking in the corner of it, I told him I wanted floor 5 he wasn't impressed by my request but pressed the button anyway.

Stepped into another lift to be faced with most of Take That a few years ago...how to look over weight and fugly in one easy step...

[Jimmytno1]

I bumped into Noel Gallagher this time last year at marylebone station in London, I'm a huge fan, I made a complete tard of myself, he probably thought I was some sort of deranged sweaty stalker, I missed my train.

[maniac0796]

I saw a bin man the other day. Thought it was Bob Geldof. It wasn't

[Rockape]

Mika Hakkinen sat at the table next to me at Stars n Bars, Monaco. He was with his kids so I didn't stare. He said Hello and asked if the wife and I were enjoying ourselves. Ended up having a blether with him over a Kronenbourg. Very decent chap.