One single thing that makes you think "knob" Vol 3
Discussion
WD39 said:
JonoG81 said:
Nobbers who decide that at 6am it's light enough to drive with just side lights on, come screaming up to a roundabout doing at least twice the limit, in the wet, and nearly cause a multiple car accident by skidding directly into the path of a bin wagon, who is already half way around said roundabout.
Although it made me chuckle watching 4 burly council workers all giving him the 'beans' signal and hurling abuse at him for his awful driving, you got the least you deserve you absolute c*nt
The 'C' word has no place on PH. Refrain.Although it made me chuckle watching 4 burly council workers all giving him the 'beans' signal and hurling abuse at him for his awful driving, you got the least you deserve you absolute c*nt
Following a (female) driver home from work who then indicated to turn right into a side road. As she turned I drove on past as you do...
...only for her to completely misjudge the turn (I mean WTF?!) and start to reverse back towards me as I was passing behind!
Mind you, she had clipped a kerb previously so who knows what state she was in.
...only for her to completely misjudge the turn (I mean WTF?!) and start to reverse back towards me as I was passing behind!
Mind you, she had clipped a kerb previously so who knows what state she was in.
WD39 said:
Hol said:
WD39 said:
Rumblestripe said:
I must confess to a little Audi baiting. I'm coming to the end of a long stretch of dual carriageway which ends in a roundabout with two exits, so logically the two lanes are left fork and right. Now I'm in the left lane and decelerating to turn left. In my rear view mirror I can Brer Audi driver closing on me rather quickly and I rather doubt that chummy is turning right into a village. So I decide to see how late he wants to brake. Yep, I'm a knob. Audi punter obviously unaware of the laws of physics thinks that he can stop his large barge quicker than my little old heap. He can't. And so he has to brake from alongside me on the roundabout and drop in behind me in the single carriageway. I mean no real harm done. No-one was close to swapping paint and no-one was really in danger of having an accident (unless chummy had tried to overtake on the single carriageway we were entering as it is double whites down the middle). The funny bit was his utter fury at me having the audacity to cause him inconvenience, he was flashing his lights and shaking the beans at me. I gave his a cheery wave and he went just about apoplectic!
If you are that Audi driver, you really need to chill out mate. There are knobs about
Is there an 'Audi Baiting' topic on PH? If not, there should be. They have definitely outstripped BMW and Range Rover Sports, (with naff plate), as the 'Roadknobs' of this particular period in driving history. I wonder who will replace them in the future? I nominate...small white vans with the company logo writ large all over it.If you are that Audi driver, you really need to chill out mate. There are knobs about
The indicators and the mirrors work perfectly fine on my daily thank you.
In fact the mirrors have a little orange LED built into the bottom of them so I can actually see
that I am indicating long before I even change lane. Edited by Hol on Monday 19th October 08:30
funkyrobot said:
Side (parking) lights and front fog lights. No dipped beam.
Smoked light lenses.
Not indicating on roundabouts.
The first and last are definitely on my list.Smoked light lenses.
Not indicating on roundabouts.
The second if the job dims the lights effectiveness and/or reflectors so you simply cannot see them when they are parked up in poor visibility.
JonoG81 said:
WD39 said:
JonoG81 said:
Nobbers who decide that at 6am it's light enough to drive with just side lights on, come screaming up to a roundabout doing at least twice the limit, in the wet, and nearly cause a multiple car accident by skidding directly into the path of a bin wagon, who is already half way around said roundabout.
Although it made me chuckle watching 4 burly council workers all giving him the 'beans' signal and hurling abuse at him for his awful driving, you got the least you deserve you absolute c*nt
The 'C' word has no place on PH. Refrain.Although it made me chuckle watching 4 burly council workers all giving him the 'beans' signal and hurling abuse at him for his awful driving, you got the least you deserve you absolute c*nt
williredale said:
JonoG81 said:
WD39 said:
JonoG81 said:
Nobbers who decide that at 6am it's light enough to drive with just side lights on, come screaming up to a roundabout doing at least twice the limit, in the wet, and nearly cause a multiple car accident by skidding directly into the path of a bin wagon, who is already half way around said roundabout.
Although it made me chuckle watching 4 burly council workers all giving him the 'beans' signal and hurling abuse at him for his awful driving, you got the least you deserve you absolute c*nt
The 'C' word has no place on PH. Refrain.Although it made me chuckle watching 4 burly council workers all giving him the 'beans' signal and hurling abuse at him for his awful driving, you got the least you deserve you absolute c*nt
Hol said:
WD39 said:
Hol said:
WD39 said:
Rumblestripe said:
I must confess to a little Audi baiting. I'm coming to the end of a long stretch of dual carriageway which ends in a roundabout with two exits, so logically the two lanes are left fork and right. Now I'm in the left lane and decelerating to turn left. In my rear view mirror I can Brer Audi driver closing on me rather quickly and I rather doubt that chummy is turning right into a village. So I decide to see how late he wants to brake. Yep, I'm a knob. Audi punter obviously unaware of the laws of physics thinks that he can stop his large barge quicker than my little old heap. He can't. And so he has to brake from alongside me on the roundabout and drop in behind me in the single carriageway. I mean no real harm done. No-one was close to swapping paint and no-one was really in danger of having an accident (unless chummy had tried to overtake on the single carriageway we were entering as it is double whites down the middle). The funny bit was his utter fury at me having the audacity to cause him inconvenience, he was flashing his lights and shaking the beans at me. I gave his a cheery wave and he went just about apoplectic!
If you are that Audi driver, you really need to chill out mate. There are knobs about
Is there an 'Audi Baiting' topic on PH? If not, there should be. They have definitely outstripped BMW and Range Rover Sports, (with naff plate), as the 'Roadknobs' of this particular period in driving history. I wonder who will replace them in the future? I nominate...small white vans with the company logo writ large all over it.If you are that Audi driver, you really need to chill out mate. There are knobs about
The indicators and the mirrors work perfectly fine on my daily thank you.
In fact the mirrors have a little orange LED built into the bottom of them so I can actually see
that I am indicating long before I even change lane. Edited by Hol on Monday 19th October 08:30
JonoG81 said:
WD39 said:
JonoG81 said:
Nobbers who decide that at 6am it's light enough to drive with just side lights on, come screaming up to a roundabout doing at least twice the limit, in the wet, and nearly cause a multiple car accident by skidding directly into the path of a bin wagon, who is already half way around said roundabout.
Although it made me chuckle watching 4 burly council workers all giving him the 'beans' signal and hurling abuse at him for his awful driving, you got the least you deserve you absolute c*nt
The 'C' word has no place on PH. Refrain.Although it made me chuckle watching 4 burly council workers all giving him the 'beans' signal and hurling abuse at him for his awful driving, you got the least you deserve you absolute c*nt
JonoG81 said:
williredale said:
JonoG81 said:
WD39 said:
JonoG81 said:
Nobbers who decide that at 6am it's light enough to drive with just side lights on, come screaming up to a roundabout doing at least twice the limit, in the wet, and nearly cause a multiple car accident by skidding directly into the path of a bin wagon, who is already half way around said roundabout.
Although it made me chuckle watching 4 burly council workers all giving him the 'beans' signal and hurling abuse at him for his awful driving, you got the least you deserve you absolute c*nt
The 'C' word has no place on PH. Refrain.Although it made me chuckle watching 4 burly council workers all giving him the 'beans' signal and hurling abuse at him for his awful driving, you got the least you deserve you absolute c*nt
I have observed that c*uncil type persons do stuff without thinking through the consequences and motoring is no exception.
Knobber in the DUB scene Polo diesel (coilovers, stretch tyres, smoked lights, illegal plate, crazy camber) driving like he was in a real life version of GTA.
I'd suggest that weaving in and out of lanes, tailgating, and cutting people up in nose to tail traffic should be left to the XBOX and not a wet rush-hour A1.
Numerous t
ts who came flying up to roundabouts when I had right of way, meaning they had to slam on the anchors at the last minute to avoid t-boning me. Special mentions to the stupid bh in the Qashqai who didn't even bother to stop, meaning I had to swerve round her, and the smarmy looking rep in the 4 Series who gave me the wker sign after I tooted him to make him aware he was halfway over the Give Way sign.
I'd suggest that weaving in and out of lanes, tailgating, and cutting people up in nose to tail traffic should be left to the XBOX and not a wet rush-hour A1.
Numerous t
ts who came flying up to roundabouts when I had right of way, meaning they had to slam on the anchors at the last minute to avoid t-boning me. Special mentions to the stupid bh in the Qashqai who didn't even bother to stop, meaning I had to swerve round her, and the smarmy looking rep in the 4 Series who gave me the wker sign after I tooted him to make him aware he was halfway over the Give Way sign.I had probably half a dozen instances on my commute home last night and this morning 
Couple highlights..
Small, usually eventful section of road after we get off the motorway. It goes Motorway Roundabout > Dual carriageway > Small Roundabout 1 > Dual Carriageway > Small Roundabout 2.
The second Small Roundabout is where most people turn left onto a B-road that leads into the suburbs etc. After the motorway roundabout, I always join the Dual Carriageway in the left lane. Because it's always bunched together and overtaking in Lane 2 then getting back to the left is a challenge..
Not for Mr.Speedy in his Corsa VXR though! He joined the Dual Carriageway behind me, Lane 1 was moving quickly enough, and there was no need to overtake really. But of course he had to try to gain 1, maybe 2 cars lead. The first Small Roundabout is a tight, cambered little bd that you really have to rag over to keep speed and make any overtakes. He barely managed this By the time we were approaching the second Small Roundabout where we all turn left, he was still alongside me. I wasn't a tt, I didn't try to close the gap in front or block him, I just drove as normal. At the last second, as we were all braking for SR2, he dives on the brakes and swerves over to the left, no indicator and cuts me up.
After the day I'd had, I couldn't even be bothered to beep, flash or wave my hands around angrily. I simply applauded him enthusiastically. Funnily enough, this made him pretty angry, and caused him to have a little fit of rage in his rear view mirror, shouting and flipping the bird. I just stayed calm, it was quite entertaining.
Second one was a bin lorry this morning.. Suburban road, southbound traffic at a standstill, northbound (mine) moving normally at 30mph. It's a wide road, there's a hatched area with broken lines in the centre of the road so overtaking buses, cyclists etc safely is a relative doddle.
Bin lorry was parked, doing it's rounds. It had left roughly a 2-car gap from itself and a central res / crossing point, just enough for normal vehicles to overtake and slot back in.
Now the car in front of me (a Chevrolet Matiz from memory) started to overtake him. Matiz indicated in advance, and moved over to the centre to overtake. Once the Matiz was about level with the lorry's rear wheels, the bin lorry indicated right and pulled forward in a single manoevre.
I honestly though the little car was about to get pushed up the central res. It barely squeezed through the gap that had closed pretty damn quickly. It's hard to explain exactly what happened but I put the blame on the bin lorry. The car was already overtaking and indicating, the lorry clearly made a 'manoevre, indicate, mirror'.
Couple highlights..
Small, usually eventful section of road after we get off the motorway. It goes Motorway Roundabout > Dual carriageway > Small Roundabout 1 > Dual Carriageway > Small Roundabout 2.
The second Small Roundabout is where most people turn left onto a B-road that leads into the suburbs etc. After the motorway roundabout, I always join the Dual Carriageway in the left lane. Because it's always bunched together and overtaking in Lane 2 then getting back to the left is a challenge..
Not for Mr.Speedy in his Corsa VXR though! He joined the Dual Carriageway behind me, Lane 1 was moving quickly enough, and there was no need to overtake really. But of course he had to try to gain 1, maybe 2 cars lead. The first Small Roundabout is a tight, cambered little b
d that you really have to rag over to keep speed and make any overtakes. He barely managed this By the time we were approaching the second Small Roundabout where we all turn left, he was still alongside me. I wasn't a tt, I didn't try to close the gap in front or block him, I just drove as normal. At the last second, as we were all braking for SR2, he dives on the brakes and swerves over to the left, no indicator and cuts me up.After the day I'd had, I couldn't even be bothered to beep, flash or wave my hands around angrily. I simply applauded him enthusiastically. Funnily enough, this made him pretty angry, and caused him to have a little fit of rage in his rear view mirror, shouting and flipping the bird. I just stayed calm, it was quite entertaining.
Second one was a bin lorry this morning.. Suburban road, southbound traffic at a standstill, northbound (mine) moving normally at 30mph. It's a wide road, there's a hatched area with broken lines in the centre of the road so overtaking buses, cyclists etc safely is a relative doddle.
Bin lorry was parked, doing it's rounds. It had left roughly a 2-car gap from itself and a central res / crossing point, just enough for normal vehicles to overtake and slot back in.
Now the car in front of me (a Chevrolet Matiz from memory) started to overtake him. Matiz indicated in advance, and moved over to the centre to overtake. Once the Matiz was about level with the lorry's rear wheels, the bin lorry indicated right and pulled forward in a single manoevre.
I honestly though the little car was about to get pushed up the central res. It barely squeezed through the gap that had closed pretty damn quickly. It's hard to explain exactly what happened but I put the blame on the bin lorry. The car was already overtaking and indicating, the lorry clearly made a 'manoevre, indicate, mirror'.
mr2j said:
So which was it? Did you "remain calm" or "applaud enthusiastically"?
I meant calm as in not angry. Normally I'd have got quite irate, but I just couldn't be bothered. When he cut me up, I just thought 'you bloody wally' and thought a sarcastic applause would be better than shouting and screaming and turning red.
In hindsight I could've done nothing at all, but hey ho.
smithyithy said:
Bin lorry was parked, doing it's rounds. It had left roughly a 2-car gap from itself and a central res / crossing point, just enough for normal vehicles to overtake and slot back in.
Now the car in front of me (a Chevrolet Matiz from memory) started to overtake him. Matiz indicated in advance, and moved over to the centre to overtake. Once the Matiz was about level with the lorry's rear wheels, the bin lorry indicated right and pulled forward in a single manoevre.
I honestly though the little car was about to get pushed up the central res. It barely squeezed through the gap that had closed pretty damn quickly. It's hard to explain exactly what happened but I put the blame on the bin lorry. The car was already overtaking and indicating, the lorry clearly made a 'manoevre, indicate, mirror'.
It's no excuse but I wouldn't be surprised if the car was in the lorry's blind spot if it was near the rear wheels.Now the car in front of me (a Chevrolet Matiz from memory) started to overtake him. Matiz indicated in advance, and moved over to the centre to overtake. Once the Matiz was about level with the lorry's rear wheels, the bin lorry indicated right and pulled forward in a single manoevre.
I honestly though the little car was about to get pushed up the central res. It barely squeezed through the gap that had closed pretty damn quickly. It's hard to explain exactly what happened but I put the blame on the bin lorry. The car was already overtaking and indicating, the lorry clearly made a 'manoevre, indicate, mirror'.
ORD said:
You knew he would join L1 but didn't back off to allow it to happen. You made it necessary for the 'cutting up' to take place. Bad driving. You obviously didn't like him using L2 so made sure not to make it easy for him to rejoin L1.
Absolutely not the case. He had opportunities to rejoin Lane 1, and there was no benefit from attempting the overtake.By the time we were braking for the second roundabout, there were still spaces for him to pull back in but it was like he didn't want to conceed his 'gain'.
At that point I'd have had to brake heavily for him to actually 'pass' me and slot in front. Instead he took it upon himself to maintain speed approaching the roundabout then late brake / dive left and force himself into the gap.
I didn't for a second 'block' him or prevent him from getting past - when he started overtaking I expected him to get further ahead of us to be fair, being in a quick car, but it's a pointless move on that road anyway as the dual sections are too short to make significant gains. There are a few cars I've seen on more than one occasion that simply bomb down the road and cut people up right before the second roundabout. it's a troublesome bit of road..
smithyithy said:
mr2j said:
So which was it? Did you "remain calm" or "applaud enthusiastically"?
I meant calm as in not angry. Normally I'd have got quite irate, but I just couldn't be bothered. When he cut me up, I just thought 'you bloody wally' and thought a sarcastic applause would be better than shouting and screaming and turning red.
In hindsight I could've done nothing at all, but hey ho.
WD39 said:
Hol said:
WD39 said:
Hol said:
WD39 said:
Rumblestripe said:
I must confess to a little Audi baiting. I'm coming to the end of a long stretch of dual carriageway which ends in a roundabout with two exits, so logically the two lanes are left fork and right. Now I'm in the left lane and decelerating to turn left. In my rear view mirror I can Brer Audi driver closing on me rather quickly and I rather doubt that chummy is turning right into a village. So I decide to see how late he wants to brake. Yep, I'm a knob. Audi punter obviously unaware of the laws of physics thinks that he can stop his large barge quicker than my little old heap. He can't. And so he has to brake from alongside me on the roundabout and drop in behind me in the single carriageway. I mean no real harm done. No-one was close to swapping paint and no-one was really in danger of having an accident (unless chummy had tried to overtake on the single carriageway we were entering as it is double whites down the middle). The funny bit was his utter fury at me having the audacity to cause him inconvenience, he was flashing his lights and shaking the beans at me. I gave his a cheery wave and he went just about apoplectic!
If you are that Audi driver, you really need to chill out mate. There are knobs about
Is there an 'Audi Baiting' topic on PH? If not, there should be. They have definitely outstripped BMW and Range Rover Sports, (with naff plate), as the 'Roadknobs' of this particular period in driving history. I wonder who will replace them in the future? I nominate...small white vans with the company logo writ large all over it.If you are that Audi driver, you really need to chill out mate. There are knobs about
The indicators and the mirrors work perfectly fine on my daily thank you.
In fact the mirrors have a little orange LED built into the bottom of them so I can actually see
that I am indicating long before I even change lane. Edited by Hol on Monday 19th October 08:30
On the motorway for example I know exactly who is behind me and whether or not they will want to pass me at the same time I would be wanting to pull out on the car in front.
I also anticipate the people in front of me who haven't yet worked out the same scenario and change lanes/speed up/slow and flash to suit the prevailing road conditions.
Finally, I indicate in plenty of time and wait for two whole seconds (about two flashes) of my indicators before I turn the wheel - to makes sure I have been seen.
Doing the above isn't hard, but it doesn't slow my progress or anyone else's as I just start thinking earlier and work around others.
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