One single thing that makes you think "knob" Vol 3

[WD39]

Blanchimont said:

WD39 said:

Blanchimont said:

Knob reward goes to the dosey mare yesterday on the slip road onto the M5 at Avonmouth.

Decided that because of the heavy traffic, and the left hand was blocked for 500yrds, and the outside lane was free, I went up the outside lane to merge in much further up, along with half a dozen or so other cars, they all merged fine, without people trying to block, but dosey mare tried to block me when merging (got that close to the car infront she was inches from hitting it).

Normally I don't bother with it, and let them in front and carry on as normal, but last night for some reason I decided to engage in her childish attempts and give it a go merging. The car infront saw what was happening, waiting, and then pulled away quickly leaving a gap I could slot in, which I did. Cue doey mare giving it the horn, turning the full beams on for a couple of minutes and giving me the coffee beans.

I don't think she liked me putting my hazards on to say thanks, as she went ballistic

A query. Is the slip road on to the M5 near Avonmouth a single lane road?

It has a 270 degree left which is a single lane. It has 2 lanes leading up to it that merge into one before the corner.

Are you saying that you drove past 500 yards of patiently waiting traffic on your left to merge/push into what you know to be a single lane?

[Cliftonite]

WD39 said:

Are you saying that you drove past 500 yards of patiently waiting traffic on your left to merge/push into what you know to be a single lane?

You never give up, do you?

He drove past 500 yards of sheeples, making good use of his ability to make progress using the available road space to its optimum, with a view to merging at the appropriate point.

Being an alert and conscientious driver gives one certain advantages over the also-rans (and bigots).

[Blanchimont]

WD39 said:

Blanchimont said:

WD39 said:

Blanchimont said:

Knob reward goes to the dosey mare yesterday on the slip road onto the M5 at Avonmouth.

Decided that because of the heavy traffic, and the left hand was blocked for 500yrds, and the outside lane was free, I went up the outside lane to merge in much further up, along with half a dozen or so other cars, they all merged fine, without people trying to block, but dosey mare tried to block me when merging (got that close to the car infront she was inches from hitting it).

Normally I don't bother with it, and let them in front and carry on as normal, but last night for some reason I decided to engage in her childish attempts and give it a go merging. The car infront saw what was happening, waiting, and then pulled away quickly leaving a gap I could slot in, which I did. Cue doey mare giving it the horn, turning the full beams on for a couple of minutes and giving me the coffee beans.

I don't think she liked me putting my hazards on to say thanks, as she went ballistic

A query. Is the slip road on to the M5 near Avonmouth a single lane road?

It has a 270 degree left which is a single lane. It has 2 lanes leading up to it that merge into one before the corner.

Are you saying that you drove past 500 yards of patiently waiting traffic on your left to merge/push into what you know to be a single lane?

Yep. The whole point of a merge in turn, is it not?


ETA: Until someone takes umbridge to a perfectly legal move and tries to block you.

[WD39]

Blanchimont said:

WD39 said:

Blanchimont said:

WD39 said:

Blanchimont said:

Knob reward goes to the dosey mare yesterday on the slip road onto the M5 at Avonmouth.

Decided that because of the heavy traffic, and the left hand was blocked for 500yrds, and the outside lane was free, I went up the outside lane to merge in much further up, along with half a dozen or so other cars, they all merged fine, without people trying to block, but dosey mare tried to block me when merging (got that close to the car infront she was inches from hitting it).

Normally I don't bother with it, and let them in front and carry on as normal, but last night for some reason I decided to engage in her childish attempts and give it a go merging. The car infront saw what was happening, waiting, and then pulled away quickly leaving a gap I could slot in, which I did. Cue doey mare giving it the horn, turning the full beams on for a couple of minutes and giving me the coffee beans.

I don't think she liked me putting my hazards on to say thanks, as she went ballistic

A query. Is the slip road on to the M5 near Avonmouth a single lane road?

It has a 270 degree left which is a single lane. It has 2 lanes leading up to it that merge into one before the corner.

Are you saying that you drove past 500 yards of patiently waiting traffic on your left to merge/push into what you know to be a single lane?

Yep. The whole point of a merge in turn, is it not?


ETA: Until someone takes umbridge to a perfectly legal move and tries to block you.

Merging in turn is recommended, but only if safe and appropriate when vehicles are travelling at vey low speed e.g. when approaching road works or a road traffic accident. It is not recommended at high speed.

Says the Highway Code.

None of this is relevant in mr. blanchimont's scenario.

I don't agree with 'blocking' and never do it, but if everybody was considerate and patient, it won't occur.

But then I guess that lifes pushers in are just that. And not only in motoring matters.

I conclude that 'merge in turn' is in the eye of the beholder.

Edited by WD39 on Wednesday 11th November 19:32

Edited by WD39 on Wednesday 11th November 19:56

[Coolbanana]

I haven't ranted in this Thread yet so I'll do so now

"Knob" perfectly describes the retarded, obnoxious and dangerous numpty that decided to accelerate when I was indicating and performing an overtaking manoeuvre.

Major queues on the M40 this evening (hopefully there is no loss of life in an accident) caused me to use a back road route home and I came across a road that I know very well that is short with a couple of tight S-Bends up hill. Lovely, after my overly long journey I thought I'd blast up said hill.

However, an SUV was in front of me so I would have to overtake. No problem, he didn't seem to be in a hurry so I indicated and went to overtake. Mr Knob then puts his foot down.

Now, I could have floored it and raced past him but on a lane that has no streetlights and a tight bend coming up, I didn't believe it wise to risk the unforeseen to prove I could still overtake. So I moved back in lane behind him while he proceeded to drive up the hill slower than my dear departed Granny would have.

Had he allowed me to complete my overtake without drama, he wouldn't have seen my taillights after the first bend. I would not have slowed his progress so what goes through the minds of these idiots?

Further on at a stop street, he stuck his head out of the window to see my car more clearly. I guess he is now regaling all who will listen how he won a race of some sort. I didn't encourage any discussion, simply let him go on his merry way.

Edited by Coolbanana on Wednesday 11th November 20:00

[e21Mark]

Anyone who advertises their car and puts ''Formula 1 type gear shift''.

[Blanchimont]

WD39 said:

Blanchimont said:

WD39 said:

Blanchimont said:

WD39 said:

Blanchimont said:

Knob reward goes to the dosey mare yesterday on the slip road onto the M5 at Avonmouth.

Decided that because of the heavy traffic, and the left hand was blocked for 500yrds, and the outside lane was free, I went up the outside lane to merge in much further up, along with half a dozen or so other cars, they all merged fine, without people trying to block, but dosey mare tried to block me when merging (got that close to the car infront she was inches from hitting it).

Normally I don't bother with it, and let them in front and carry on as normal, but last night for some reason I decided to engage in her childish attempts and give it a go merging. The car infront saw what was happening, waiting, and then pulled away quickly leaving a gap I could slot in, which I did. Cue doey mare giving it the horn, turning the full beams on for a couple of minutes and giving me the coffee beans.

I don't think she liked me putting my hazards on to say thanks, as she went ballistic

A query. Is the slip road on to the M5 near Avonmouth a single lane road?

It has a 270 degree left which is a single lane. It has 2 lanes leading up to it that merge into one before the corner.

Are you saying that you drove past 500 yards of patiently waiting traffic on your left to merge/push into what you know to be a single lane?

Yep. The whole point of a merge in turn, is it not?


ETA: Until someone takes umbridge to a perfectly legal move and tries to block you.

Merging in turn is recommended, but only if safe and appropriate when vehicles are travelling at vey low speed e.g. when approaching road works or a road traffic accident. It is not recommended at high speed.

Says the Highway Code.

None of this is relevant in mr. blanchimont's scenario.

I don't agree with 'blocking' and never do it, but if everybody was considerate and patient, it won't occur.

But then I guess that lifes pushers in are just that. And not only in motoring matters.

I conclude that 'merge in turn' is in the eye of the beholder.

Edited by WD39 on Wednesday 11th November 19:32

Edited by WD39 on Wednesday 11th November 19:56

It was at a crawl, as there was an accident on the motorway, less than 10mph 100%, more like 5.


Yesterday, as an example, I moved over early (as there was a big enough space for me to do so) and I caught eye contact the the bloke who was behind me in the outside lane, I let him in.

What's the point in arguing on 3ft of tarmac that you don't own. Chill out, turn the music up and everybody just wants to get home, it doesn't need to be an arguement.

[alpha channel]

The plonker in a Golf Plus that pulled out on the van that was in front of me on the A1/A689 interchange seemingly without bothering to look as the van had to swerve right across the road (dual lane and no-one was beside him thankfully) to avoid rear ending him. Then a wee bit of the van driver as he then promptly cut up the Golf, missing the muppet by a foot or so.

[Jon321]

People who drive with just one hand on the wheel and with this single hand in the 12 o'clock position. Often coupled with loud music blaring out. Or at least the lad who looked about 17 had some loud noise emitting from his open window this morning as he drove in this way.

[nickfrog]

True, and particularly performance cars, where you would expect the owner to at least remotely know how to hold the steering wheel. Amusingly, those cars are often equipped with very large wheels, as this is also very "sporty".

[Zod]

Sunday evening a few weeks ago, with clear traffic, I took my place at the front of the right hand lane here at the lights. The RH lane is straight on only. The LH lane is marked for turning left only.

https://www.google.co.uk/maps/@51.5612104,-0.17934...

https://www.google.co.uk/maps/@51.5612104,-0.17934...

If you are going straight on, you need to pull to the left after the cars from the LH lane turn left, because of the island with the traffic light.

On this Sunday evening, I saw a 458 approaching from the rear in my lane, so presumably with the intention of going straight on, down into the village. When he saw that the LH lane was clear, he pulled in alongside me. His plan was obvious. Even had I been tempted (I wasn't - a 458 would have been quicker off the line and I'm a grown up these days), I'd have been left with nowhere to go, in danger of hitting the island. I just let the clutch out gently and trundled up the the 20 speed limit wheil 458 man streaked off.

[WD39]

Blanchimont said:

WD39 said:

Blanchimont said:

WD39 said:

Blanchimont said:

WD39 said:

Blanchimont said:

Knob reward goes to the dosey mare yesterday on the slip road onto the M5 at Avonmouth.

Decided that because of the heavy traffic, and the left hand was blocked for 500yrds, and the outside lane was free, I went up the outside lane to merge in much further up, along with half a dozen or so other cars, they all merged fine, without people trying to block, but dosey mare tried to block me when merging (got that close to the car infront she was inches from hitting it).

Normally I don't bother with it, and let them in front and carry on as normal, but last night for some reason I decided to engage in her childish attempts and give it a go merging. The car infront saw what was happening, waiting, and then pulled away quickly leaving a gap I could slot in, which I did. Cue doey mare giving it the horn, turning the full beams on for a couple of minutes and giving me the coffee beans.

I don't think she liked me putting my hazards on to say thanks, as she went ballistic

A query. Is the slip road on to the M5 near Avonmouth a single lane road?

It has a 270 degree left which is a single lane. It has 2 lanes leading up to it that merge into one before the corner.

Are you saying that you drove past 500 yards of patiently waiting traffic on your left to merge/push into what you know to be a single lane?

Yep. The whole point of a merge in turn, is it not?


ETA: Until someone takes umbridge to a perfectly legal move and tries to block you.

Merging in turn is recommended, but only if safe and appropriate when vehicles are travelling at vey low speed e.g. when approaching road works or a road traffic accident. It is not recommended at high speed.

Says the Highway Code.

None of this is relevant in mr. blanchimont's scenario.

I don't agree with 'blocking' and never do it, but if everybody was considerate and patient, it won't occur.

But then I guess that lifes pushers in are just that. And not only in motoring matters.

I conclude that 'merge in turn' is in the eye of the beholder.

Edited by WD39 on Wednesday 11th November 19:32

Edited by WD39 on Wednesday 11th November 19:56

It was at a crawl, as there was an accident on the motorway, less than 10mph 100%, more like 5.


Yesterday, as an example, I moved over early (as there was a big enough space for me to do so) and I caught eye contact the the bloke who was behind me in the outside lane, I let him in.

What's the point in arguing on 3ft of tarmac that you don't own. Chill out, turn the music up and everybody just wants to get home, it doesn't need to be an arguement.

Crawl?
You went into lane two, drove 500 yards past 'blocked traffic', before the 'merge in turn' took place.

If that is a crawl, I'm Stirling Moss, Jackie Stewart AND Lewis Hamilton.

[ORD]

Zod said:

Sunday evening a few weeks ago, with clear traffic, I took my place at the front of the right hand lane here at the lights. The RH lane is straight on only. The LH lane is marked for turning left only.

https://www.google.co.uk/maps/@51.5612104,-0.17934...

https://www.google.co.uk/maps/@51.5612104,-0.17934...

If you are going straight on, you need to pull to the left after the cars from the LH lane turn left, because of the island with the traffic light.

On this Sunday evening, I saw a 458 approaching from the rear in my lane, so presumably with the intention of going straight on, down into the village. When he saw that the LH lane was clear, he pulled in alongside me. His plan was obvious. Even had I been tempted (I wasn't - a 458 would have been quicker off the line and I'm a grown up these days), I'd have been left with nowhere to go, in danger of hitting the island. I just let the clutch out gently and trundled up the the 20 speed limit wheil 458 man streaked off.

You got to listen to a 458 at WOT off the line. And he didn't even slow you down much. Hard to see the problem.

[Biker's Nemesis]

I can't think of a more lame piss boiling advert than this Tesco one, the "Actor" together with his mannerisms and dialog make me want to kick the living fk out of him for being a pussy of a man.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=au212g0V2Ik

Had to get that off my chest.

[jogger1976]

Probably going to get slaughtered for this but had to get it off my chest. Fancied a portion of chips this lunchtime, so I popped into one that's near where I work.
I went in and ordered my chips and as I was waiting at the counter I noticed at the back, where the seating area was, a father and son tucking into large battered sausage and chips with accompanying full fat Coke.

Now while we live in a free country and everyone has a choice to do what they want, what shocked me the most was that both where obese. The dad was easily 20 stone, but the lad, who was probably about 19-20, was probably nearer 30 stone. Additionally, he was sweating buckets and wheezing like Darth Vader. He was also incredibly pale, as if he hadn't been outside for years.

I went back to my car to eat my chips and the dad and son came out shortly after towards their car. The dad was having quite a lot of trouble walking, even with a stick, but the lad appeared to be in some pain and had to stop to lean on a railing to sup on another can of full fat Coke.

They continued to walk the remaining 20 feet to the disabled bay (they had a parking badge) and after taking several minutes to get in, during which the suspension dipped alarmingly, they drove off.

Am I a heartless bd, or are these two knobs?

[ORD]

jogger1976 said:

Probably going to get slaughtered for this but had to get it off my chest. Fancied a portion of chips this lunchtime, so I popped into one that's near where I work.
I went in and ordered my chips and as I was waiting at the counter I noticed at the back, where the seating area was, a father and son tucking into large battered sausage and chips with accompanying full fat Coke.

Now while we live in a free country and everyone has a choice to do what they want, what shocked me the most was that both where obese. The dad was easily 20 stone, but the lad, who was probably about 19-20, was probably nearer 30 stone. Additionally, he was sweating buckets and wheezing like Darth Vader. He was also incredibly pale, as if he hadn't been outside for years.

I went back to my car to eat my chips and the dad and son came out shortly after towards their car. The dad was having quite a lot of trouble walking, even with a stick, but the lad appeared to be in some pain and had to stop to lean on a railing to sup on another can of full fat Coke.

They continued to walk the remaining 20 feet to the disabled bay (they had a parking badge) and after taking several minutes to get in, during which the suspension dipped alarmingly, they drove off.

Am I a heartless bd, or are these two knobs?

You and I paid for the sausage, the chips, the Coke and the car.

The sad part is that they are probably desperately unhappy.

[daveinhampshire]

jogger1976 said:

Probably going to get slaughtered for this but had to get it off my chest. Fancied a portion of chips this lunchtime, so I popped into one that's near where I work.
I went in and ordered my chips and as I was waiting at the counter I noticed at the back, where the seating area was, a father and son tucking into large battered sausage and chips with accompanying full fat Coke.

Now while we live in a free country and everyone has a choice to do what they want, what shocked me the most was that both where obese. The dad was easily 20 stone, but the lad, who was probably about 19-20, was probably nearer 30 stone. Additionally, he was sweating buckets and wheezing like Darth Vader. He was also incredibly pale, as if he hadn't been outside for years.

I went back to my car to eat my chips and the dad and son came out shortly after towards their car. The dad was having quite a lot of trouble walking, even with a stick, but the lad appeared to be in some pain and had to stop to lean on a railing to sup on another can of full fat Coke.

They continued to walk the remaining 20 feet to the disabled bay (they had a parking badge) and after taking several minutes to get in, during which the suspension dipped alarmingly, they drove off.

Am I a heartless bd, or are these two knobs?

There'll be a million excuses as to why they can't lose weight but the truth is they're gutty and don't want to do anything about it.

[jogger1976]

ORD said:

jogger1976 said:

Probably going to get slaughtered for this but had to get it off my chest. Fancied a portion of chips this lunchtime, so I popped into one that's near where I work.
I went in and ordered my chips and as I was waiting at the counter I noticed at the back, where the seating area was, a father and son tucking into large battered sausage and chips with accompanying full fat Coke.

Now while we live in a free country and everyone has a choice to do what they want, what shocked me the most was that both where obese. The dad was easily 20 stone, but the lad, who was probably about 19-20, was probably nearer 30 stone. Additionally, he was sweating buckets and wheezing like Darth Vader. He was also incredibly pale, as if he hadn't been outside for years.

I went back to my car to eat my chips and the dad and son came out shortly after towards their car. The dad was having quite a lot of trouble walking, even with a stick, but the lad appeared to be in some pain and had to stop to lean on a railing to sup on another can of full fat Coke.

They continued to walk the remaining 20 feet to the disabled bay (they had a parking badge) and after taking several minutes to get in, during which the suspension dipped alarmingly, they drove off.

Am I a heartless bd, or are these two knobs?

You and I paid for the sausage, the chips, the Coke and the car.

The sad part is that they are probably desperately unhappy.

I think you're right, they didn't look too happy to be honest. The lad looked particularly miserable and it was noticeable that they didn't really seem to communicate with each other.

The funny thing was, just prior to going into the shop I'd caught my reflection in the mirror and noticed I had a bit of a gut developing, which made me feel a bit self-conscious

Seeing those two put that into perspective.

[MarkRSi]

What sort of car did they get into? (this is general gassing after all...)

I'd say the old man is the biggest knob - yeah the lads probably 19-20 as you say but I'd imagine his parents have been stuffing his face all his life, so doesn't know any different

[yellowjack]

Two for me today please...

The elderly Doris in front of me in Farnborough heading for the station. She was 'comfort braking' at everything in sight - peds on the footway, parked cars on the other side of the road, oncoming vehicles, the mouths of completely empty side turns. So I stayed well back, as I suspected she was struggling with her eyesight.

Suspicion appeared to be confirmed when she suddenly, and without recourse to a signal, veered across the opposite lane to take up a parking space beside the cemetery. Straight across in front of a rapidly closing Transit van, what's driver was none too pleased judging by the long blast of the horn that he gave her. The look on her face just made things worse, really. She looked incredulous that it could possibly be her action that might be the intended recipient of the Beeeeeep! I genuinely believe that she had no idea how close she'd just come to a head-on collision with one of our typically reserved and polite local white van men.


Speaking of polite and reserved van drivers, I was cycling home from the bike shop tonight,, and was passing a long queue of almost stationary traffic. I was correctly passing on the right of said traffic, taking refuge in spaces between cars when oncoming traffic required it. As I passed one van, all I heard from the open driver's window was a tirade of expletives...

idiot van driver said:

"--------------fking ---you-----fking -----"

...there were some non-sweary words connecting the expletives together into something vaguely resembling English, but I was too busy riding past the queue to hear what the gist of his problem was. That and the fact that his comedy hard-man 'Mockney' builder accent meant that even if I'd stuck around to hear what he had to say, I'd probably have been none the wiser.

What a twunt. Seriously? Who bothers to wind a window down to abuse someone who clearly doesn't give a stuff what you have to say for yourself because he's busy getting home far more quickly than you could ever hope to through that traffic. Jealous much, dhead?