One single thing that makes you think "knob" Vol 3
Discussion
AJXX1 said:
Really minor complaint and I was somewhat the knob today, but the daft cow in the Fiat 500 on the roundabout today who (it seemed) went out of her way just to prevent me merging in front of her despite the broken down car in L1. Everyone else had managed to flawlessly merge, but no, not her, she wasn't going to let me get in front of her for the life of her - despite me indicating, the blockage ahead being obvious and everyone else going out of the way to allow people in L1 to merge into L2.
She had more then enough time and room to have let me merge, but flat out refused and kept closing the gap to within an inch of the car in front - forcing me to a standstill at the broken down car. Which admittedly did annoy me so I gave her a good horn blast and a "WTF" hand signal (hands in the air).
The car behind her let me in. Fiat 500 knob then proceeds onto the DC, in L2 at about 40 MPH. Which only further wound me up. I don't often loose my cool but she'd gone out of her way to prevent me merging without any real reason to do so, and now is completely blocking off L2.
As soon as it was safe to do so I put my foot down, undertook in L1 and gave her a good horn blast on the way past.
I admit, I lost my cool and was a bit of a knob - but what a b
h!
I agree. Very occasionally there is an incident like that you describe when a good blast makes you feel much better. I think it is essential to have the odd lapse of your normal cool.She had more then enough time and room to have let me merge, but flat out refused and kept closing the gap to within an inch of the car in front - forcing me to a standstill at the broken down car. Which admittedly did annoy me so I gave her a good horn blast and a "WTF" hand signal (hands in the air).
The car behind her let me in. Fiat 500 knob then proceeds onto the DC, in L2 at about 40 MPH. Which only further wound me up. I don't often loose my cool but she'd gone out of her way to prevent me merging without any real reason to do so, and now is completely blocking off L2.
As soon as it was safe to do so I put my foot down, undertook in L1 and gave her a good horn blast on the way past.
I admit, I lost my cool and was a bit of a knob - but what a b
h!AlexRS2782 said:
Issi said:
People who leave Glastonbury stickers on their windscreens.
The same goes for those who leave stand passes & tickets from car shows from months ago on their dash - see also car show lanyards hanging from the rear view mirror and people that leave their allocation number written on their rear screen after going to Santa Pod. There's a suitably badly modified Impreza locally that has all of the above on it and it relates to a Japanese car show from 2015 
WJNB said:
playalistic said:
Clearly other bloke is the knob of the situation but I just let these fks in and get on with my life. Territorial pissing on the roads only ever ends up going one way.
Well said. ks in and get on with my life. Territorial pissing on the roads only ever ends up going one way.While enjoying a variety of nice sports cars over the years encountering others who want to race me from the lights, sniff my exhaust pipes or just need to prove something has always amused me. I ALWAYS take the wind from their sails & let them get on with it, offering no competition whatsoever thus spoiling THEIR fun & making themselves look silly & impotent. It's the sense of impotence & ineffectiveness that really hurts them you see.
I carry on in my own sweet way as happy as can be.
Liquid Knight said:
Trabi601 said:
giblet said:
AJXX1 said:
Knob in the local supermarket queue today, bragging to the checkout girl about his "AMG Merc" after flashing an AMG keyring at her and then banging on about how fast it is, how good it sounds, etc... all whilst holding up the line and as loud as possible so everyone could hear....
The idea of discussing or even bragging about my car to a checkout operator makes me cringe. Exchange pleasantries, get your shopping and bugger off. What a prize bellend. What are the odds of this really happening vs. being a completely made up story?
Krikkit said:
yellowjack said:
A roundabout I regularly use is a favourite for this "going ahead from the right-turn-only lane" nonsense. It doesn't affect me too much, as I'm mostly turning right from the correct lane, but if one of these sump plugs is ahead of me I have to be prepared to come to a halt part way round the roundabout if they misjudge their attempt to push in to the straight-ahead-only lane at the last moment. My only worry is that while I'm expecting it (I'd estimate that at least one car does it every second time I go through there) the car behind me may not. I fear that one day I (or someone else) may be 'rear-ended' by a following vehicle if they've had to stop part way round what should be a free flowing roundabout. 
Not to mention the inconvenience it can cause on the straight-ahead lane.Several roundabouts on my commute are this way, and part of the reason the queues for straight ahead are so long is because the impatient people who cut in do so causing much more disruption!
bony_13 said:
Football pundits (typically ex-pros) that use the phrase "he's been a great servant to the club" in relation to ANY professional player. How the word servant can be used with a person who earns £50k to £150k WEEKLY is beyond me!
Bonus knob points if player is actually bang average and been at the club <10 years hanging on to the gravy train. Last nights case in point was Coloccini at Newcastle....
'Servant.' A correct but slightly old fashioned term meaning a long and loyal employee.Bonus knob points if player is actually bang average and been at the club <10 years hanging on to the gravy train. Last nights case in point was Coloccini at Newcastle....
'Journeyman' is another different but related description.
Some selfish scruffy looking fat man in one of those MG Rover 75s with big Halfords special alloys. I was waiting to pull into stop start traffic turning left, a car was blocking me, I didn't mind too much, MG was to my right behind the car blocking the junction, would have been easy for him to let me out but he doesn't and accelerated to ensure I don't get out, I mumble "thanks mate", nothing else, just mumbled it to myself. he stopped right in front of me, turned around in his seat and started shouting until the car behind him beeped (who happily let me out). The prick then went across two different zebra crossings while people were crossing.
WD39 said:
Fermit The Krog and Sarah Sexy said:
WaferThinHam said:
To the knob jocket in the Qashqai. I overtook a lorry in an NSL on the R1. Got back over to my own side of the road to realise the Quashiqai coming the the other way was flashing me. I had enough time on my own side of the road to choose between my usual how many flashes can I get back, or a cheery wave. I went with the cheery wave, which they saw and gave me the wker back. People are weird.
Also another knob jockey in his Golf R (or other "fast" Golf). Coming off of a roundabout under the A5 in MK, it feeds from 2 lanes down to 1. He clearly didn't like me carrying more speed off of the roundabout meaning I could slot in between him and the car in front. More horn and lights. Shouldn't have left a gap if you didn't want me to fill it.
What is it about Milton Keynes that means it's a by word for crap driving.
I've had this twice in the last month. Both occasions were completely safe overtakes, with 4-5 seconds for the car coming the other way to meet me after pulling in. Firstly a fat council type lass in an ancient Ford Galaxy having a fit with hand signals, and secondly a twerp in a Golf flashing and giving me the finger. I'm not in the habit of risking head-ons, utter morons! ker back. People are weird.Also another knob jockey in his Golf R (or other "fast" Golf). Coming off of a roundabout under the A5 in MK, it feeds from 2 lanes down to 1. He clearly didn't like me carrying more speed off of the roundabout meaning I could slot in between him and the car in front. More horn and lights. Shouldn't have left a gap if you didn't want me to fill it.
What is it about Milton Keynes that means it's a by word for crap driving.
(Is there a maths wizzard out there who can calculate time/distance etc?)
The highway code says the braking distance at 60 is 80 metres.
Return to your side and count to 3 is enough time to stop with 1970s drum brakes and tyres.
3 seconds is generous but I'd agree it's a good target to aim for. I'd go down to 1.5 seconds in the right situation.
ShaunTheSheep said:
WD39 said:
Fermit The Krog and Sarah Sexy said:
WaferThinHam said:
To the knob jocket in the Qashqai. I overtook a lorry in an NSL on the R1. Got back over to my own side of the road to realise the Quashiqai coming the the other way was flashing me. I had enough time on my own side of the road to choose between my usual how many flashes can I get back, or a cheery wave. I went with the cheery wave, which they saw and gave me the wker back. People are weird.
Also another knob jockey in his Golf R (or other "fast" Golf). Coming off of a roundabout under the A5 in MK, it feeds from 2 lanes down to 1. He clearly didn't like me carrying more speed off of the roundabout meaning I could slot in between him and the car in front. More horn and lights. Shouldn't have left a gap if you didn't want me to fill it.
What is it about Milton Keynes that means it's a by word for crap driving.
I've had this twice in the last month. Both occasions were completely safe overtakes, with 4-5 seconds for the car coming the other way to meet me after pulling in. Firstly a fat council type lass in an ancient Ford Galaxy having a fit with hand signals, and secondly a twerp in a Golf flashing and giving me the finger. I'm not in the habit of risking head-ons, utter morons! ker back. People are weird.Also another knob jockey in his Golf R (or other "fast" Golf). Coming off of a roundabout under the A5 in MK, it feeds from 2 lanes down to 1. He clearly didn't like me carrying more speed off of the roundabout meaning I could slot in between him and the car in front. More horn and lights. Shouldn't have left a gap if you didn't want me to fill it.
What is it about Milton Keynes that means it's a by word for crap driving.
(Is there a maths wizzard out there who can calculate time/distance etc?)
The highway code says the braking distance at 60 is 80 metres.
Return to your side and count to 3 is enough time to stop with 1970s drum brakes and tyres.
3 seconds is generous but I'd agree it's a good target to aim for. I'd go down to 1.5 seconds in the right situation.
Like the silly bint last night. Leaving a 30 zone in to NSL both me and the car behind overtook her safely, as she was driving at 20mph. looked in the rearview to see her giving a seatbelt hand signal.... in front of her young kids.
If you don't want to be overtaken try driving at an appropriate speed.
Parked in a public parking bay this morning outside a house on a public street. You get where this is going right...
Got back to my car 2 hours later to find it completely blocked in. I was on the end bay (the red square) and was behind a Mini (the green square). I got back to find a car parked in the blue square about 15 cm away from my bumper. The mini was also too close so I was stuck.
Took a guess that the car who had come and blocked me in belonged to the house I was parked in front of. Knocked on the door, asked if it was his and then got told to move it. He didn't look very happy.
It's a shame that when I park in that road, it's obvious where I'm going or next time I'd be tempted to block him and disappear for 2 hours as payback.
Got back to my car 2 hours later to find it completely blocked in. I was on the end bay (the red square) and was behind a Mini (the green square). I got back to find a car parked in the blue square about 15 cm away from my bumper. The mini was also too close so I was stuck.
Took a guess that the car who had come and blocked me in belonged to the house I was parked in front of. Knocked on the door, asked if it was his and then got told to move it. He didn't look very happy.
It's a shame that when I park in that road, it's obvious where I'm going or next time I'd be tempted to block him and disappear for 2 hours as payback.
ashleyman said:
Parked in a public parking bay this morning outside a house on a public street. You get where this is going right...
Got back to my car 2 hours later to find it completely blocked in. I was on the end bay (the red square) and was behind a Mini (the green square). I got back to find a car parked in the blue square about 15 cm away from my bumper. The mini was also too close so I was stuck.
Took a guess that the car who had come and blocked me in belonged to the house I was parked in front of. Knocked on the door, asked if it was his and then got told to move it. He didn't look very happy.
It's a shame that when I park in that road, it's obvious where I'm going or next time I'd be tempted to block him and disappear for 2 hours as payback.
As long as everyone has got somewhere to park then what's the problem. Oh, it's his space. The nob.Got back to my car 2 hours later to find it completely blocked in. I was on the end bay (the red square) and was behind a Mini (the green square). I got back to find a car parked in the blue square about 15 cm away from my bumper. The mini was also too close so I was stuck.
Took a guess that the car who had come and blocked me in belonged to the house I was parked in front of. Knocked on the door, asked if it was his and then got told to move it. He didn't look very happy.
It's a shame that when I park in that road, it's obvious where I'm going or next time I'd be tempted to block him and disappear for 2 hours as payback.
Sunday drivers. Two on the way in to Worksop just now. First a young lass in a bright Up; left a junction to our right completely neglecting to see A) the give way sign, B) the stop markings on the road, and C) a great big Passat estate already using the main road... result, she drove straight out the junction causing the Passat to slam on his brakes, horn, herself still oblivious to the crash she'd nearly caused.
Secondly in the town centre an old dear in something small and Korean, at a junction turning left, me having entered the right lane next to her. She goes over the line in to my path nearly hitting me, give a 'oy' horn tap. She then veers closer to me again, and nearly taking the front of my car off gets a longer horn blast to stop her colliding with me. Then she just freezes to a stop, again completely oblivious to the fact she's nearly caused an accident.
Really, if driving is that much of a struggle then stay at home!
Secondly in the town centre an old dear in something small and Korean, at a junction turning left, me having entered the right lane next to her. She goes over the line in to my path nearly hitting me, give a 'oy' horn tap. She then veers closer to me again, and nearly taking the front of my car off gets a longer horn blast to stop her colliding with me. Then she just freezes to a stop, again completely oblivious to the fact she's nearly caused an accident.
Really, if driving is that much of a struggle then stay at home!
ashleyman said:
Fermit The Krog and Sarah Sexy said:
As long as everyone has got somewhere to park then what's the problem. Oh, it's his space. The nob.
It's not his space but he struck me as one of these knobs that think it is their space as it's outside their house... 
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