One single thing that makes you think "knob" Vol 3
Discussion
Phon_E87 said:
I wouldn't go so far as to say "knob" but: those "Baby on Board" stickers and their numerous variations.
A: Why do I care?
B: Do you think that, if you did not have that sticker, other drivers would be flinging themselves into you with suicidal abandon upon the merest sniff of a rugrat being present in your vehicle?
Why do people feel the need to advertise the fact that they have a child in their car?
So that if they crash the emergency services know to look for a child/baby?A: Why do I care?
B: Do you think that, if you did not have that sticker, other drivers would be flinging themselves into you with suicidal abandon upon the merest sniff of a rugrat being present in your vehicle?
Why do people feel the need to advertise the fact that they have a child in their car?
But as with so many things, they have been overloaded with the nonsense of "comedy" alternatives to the original plan, with crap like "Princess on board" or "Man Utd Fan on Board" (which would probably mean that B on your list happens quite a lot..."
At uni I used a graphics machine in our art department to make one that said "Student Scum On Board" and stuck it on my Metro (don't laugh) - the car got wrecked in a crash a few weeks later and I forgot to remove it before it got scrapped. It looked nice paired with a set of red furry dice a mate bought me as a pisstake Christmas present....
Shakermaker said:
Phon_E87 said:
I wouldn't go so far as to say "knob" but: those "Baby on Board" stickers and their numerous variations.
A: Why do I care?
B: Do you think that, if you did not have that sticker, other drivers would be flinging themselves into you with suicidal abandon upon the merest sniff of a rugrat being present in your vehicle?
Why do people feel the need to advertise the fact that they have a child in their car?
So that if they crash the emergency services know to look for a child/baby?A: Why do I care?
B: Do you think that, if you did not have that sticker, other drivers would be flinging themselves into you with suicidal abandon upon the merest sniff of a rugrat being present in your vehicle?
Why do people feel the need to advertise the fact that they have a child in their car?
If it is - presumably these parents remove said sticker when the baby is not on board, afterall, they wouldn't want to waste the emergency services time and effort searching for a non existent baby in the event of an accident that has incapacitated the parent.
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/motoring/news/9599881/B...
Big Rod said:
There was a spate of it around here a while ago. People getting in their car in the morning and the wheels falling off before they got to the end of their road.
Mainly 4x4s IIRC and my mate got caught out about a mile form his front door and his Land Rover ended up in a ditch.
Is this dim witted thieves who haven't heard of wheel locking nuts and try that one last?Mainly 4x4s IIRC and my mate got caught out about a mile form his front door and his Land Rover ended up in a ditch.
Europa1 said:
They are a mere bagatelle in the irritation stakes compared to the "Show Dogs in Transit" ones you sometimes see.
One of my uncles used to show dogs, and on his way to shows drove very sedately so as not to stress the dogs (one of them used to get car-sick). So maybe the sign is to warn you the driver will be braking gently, accelerating snailwise, and cornering slowly?Moonhawk said:
Shakermaker said:
Phon_E87 said:
I wouldn't go so far as to say "knob" but: those "Baby on Board" stickers and their numerous variations.
A: Why do I care?
B: Do you think that, if you did not have that sticker, other drivers would be flinging themselves into you with suicidal abandon upon the merest sniff of a rugrat being present in your vehicle?
Why do people feel the need to advertise the fact that they have a child in their car?
So that if they crash the emergency services know to look for a child/baby?A: Why do I care?
B: Do you think that, if you did not have that sticker, other drivers would be flinging themselves into you with suicidal abandon upon the merest sniff of a rugrat being present in your vehicle?
Why do people feel the need to advertise the fact that they have a child in their car?
If it is - presumably these parents remove said sticker when the baby is not on board, afterall, they wouldn't want to waste the emergency services time and effort searching for a non existent baby in the event of an accident that has incapacitated the parent.
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/motoring/news/9599881/B...
AW111 said:
One of my uncles used to show dogs, and on his way to shows drove very sedately so as not to stress the dogs (one of them used to get car-sick). So maybe the sign is to warn you the driver will be braking gently, accelerating snailwise, and cornering slowly?
In a way that's fair enough, but I suspect that 99 times out of a hundred - (not an empirically proven statistic) - this simply doesn't apply.Back to the "Baby on Board" - I'd suggest it should be taken as more of a warning to other road users that the Soft Roader\MPV with a glove compartment full of rugrats is inevitably going to be driven without due care and attention in a random left\right speed up\slow down fashion as its one careful adult - nominally in charge of driving - spends considerably more of their attention dealing with whichever one of their little darlings has smeared chocolate over the satnav and considerably less concentrating on where they themselves are actually going\how well they are getting there\literally any other road user around them or anything at all beyond the confines presently delineated by the howling, wailing, and sugar-ravaged bubble in which they are sitting.
So yes, as a warning to others to keep at a safe distance for their own sake, then I guess they work!
yellowjack said:
jogger1976 said:
The arrogant tosser in the RS5 driving way too fast through Kempston today.
Nearly rear ended a bus as he was too busy showing off to his WAG, then jumped the lights going towards Bedford, narrowly avoiding a car coming from the left.
Additional knob points for doing all this near a park packed with families with young kids, driving while on the phone, and for playing some truly s
t dubstep at ear bleeding levels. 
Nope. Didn't happen. 'spookly' and several of his 'Chew the Fat dot org' circle jerk fanclub will be along shortly to inform you, in an adenoidal tone, that 'as you well know, and as parish council surveys have conclusively demonstrated, red lights are ONLY ignored by one road user group, and that, my friend, is the Lycra clad menace commonly known as CYCLISTS'Nearly rear ended a bus as he was too busy showing off to his WAG, then jumped the lights going towards Bedford, narrowly avoiding a car coming from the left.
Additional knob points for doing all this near a park packed with families with young kids, driving while on the phone, and for playing some truly s
t dubstep at ear bleeding levels. Moonhawk said:
Big Rod said:
There was a spate of it around here a while ago. People getting in their car in the morning and the wheels falling off before they got to the end of their road.
Mainly 4x4s IIRC and my mate got caught out about a mile form his front door and his Land Rover ended up in a ditch.
Sounds more like somebody with a vendetta against cars, or somebody playing a stupid practical joke - as opposed to a real attempt to steal the wheels.Mainly 4x4s IIRC and my mate got caught out about a mile form his front door and his Land Rover ended up in a ditch.
Big Rod said:
Moonhawk said:
Big Rod said:
There was a spate of it around here a while ago. People getting in their car in the morning and the wheels falling off before they got to the end of their road.
Mainly 4x4s IIRC and my mate got caught out about a mile form his front door and his Land Rover ended up in a ditch.
Sounds more like somebody with a vendetta against cars, or somebody playing a stupid practical joke - as opposed to a real attempt to steal the wheels.Mainly 4x4s IIRC and my mate got caught out about a mile form his front door and his Land Rover ended up in a ditch.
...got the little twunt on CCTV, no mug shot but and the Audi A3 he got into had a plate from a Golf so that's as far as the Police can run with it.
Moonhawk said:
Shakermaker said:
Phon_E87 said:
I wouldn't go so far as to say "knob" but: those "Baby on Board" stickers and their numerous variations.
A: Why do I care?
B: Do you think that, if you did not have that sticker, other drivers would be flinging themselves into you with suicidal abandon upon the merest sniff of a rugrat being present in your vehicle?
Why do people feel the need to advertise the fact that they have a child in their car?
So that if they crash the emergency services know to look for a child/baby?A: Why do I care?
B: Do you think that, if you did not have that sticker, other drivers would be flinging themselves into you with suicidal abandon upon the merest sniff of a rugrat being present in your vehicle?
Why do people feel the need to advertise the fact that they have a child in their car?
If it is - presumably these parents remove said sticker when the baby is not on board, afterall, they wouldn't want to waste the emergency services time and effort searching for a non existent baby in the event of an accident that has incapacitated the parent.
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/motoring/news/9599881/B...
A child seat in the back would be a better signal.
Baby on board signs are contemptible nonsense.
However, I fully support them and encourage their continued use. If you fancy one - get 2.
They're a great way to spot drivers who are less likely to be paying attention!
White van man on A30 heading up towards Truro from Hayle. I'm in outside lane, stationary and awaiting traffic moving off, so that I might join inside lane without pushing ahead of anyone. Mr Intelect pulls up and decides to try and stop me joining inside lane for some bizarre reason? My car is LHD and being a hot day we both have our windows open, so he's only a foot or two away and trying to look aggressive. Baffled, I ignore him and simply pull in front of him, joining the traffic as intended. Cue 'hand shandy' signs and unintelligible shouting. I don't bother reacting, although I'm genuinely baffled as to what this guys problem is? Anyway, we queue a while longer as we approach the final roundabout before traffic moves more freely. Now Brains pulls along side and starts screaming and shouting, whilst gesturing to pull over, which I couldn't do even if I wanted to, due to heavy traffic, no space and local authority cameras. Instead, I pucker up and blow a kiss. Nope, he's still shouting, so I blow him another kiss and wink invitingly. Nothing, not even a smile. Maybe I'm just not his type?
Mr white transit van, you really need to chill out. If you really were so desperate to be 6 feet further on than I, why not simply ask nicely? Maybe you just wanted to feel all manly and hoped for fisticuffs at the roadside, in which case try waiting till there's actually room to stop, instead of just looking a knob and getting yourself so worked up. Trust me, judging by your complexion today, you're pretty close to a heart attack!
Mr white transit van, you really need to chill out. If you really were so desperate to be 6 feet further on than I, why not simply ask nicely? Maybe you just wanted to feel all manly and hoped for fisticuffs at the roadside, in which case try waiting till there's actually room to stop, instead of just looking a knob and getting yourself so worked up. Trust me, judging by your complexion today, you're pretty close to a heart attack!
The cretin in the white steqai (okay qashqai) yesterday morning who was plonked in L2 like a prize dick when we arrived at a roundabout and he suddenly realised that he wanted to turn off at the slip road (which isn't possible from L2). He nearly wiped me out as he moved over without so much as looking.
Not only that he then crawled down the slip road in L2 despite no other cars being around. FFS get in the right lane you knob!
Several miles later I met him again on a DC - again he's in L2 with little other traffic around, entering a 3 lane MW. As soon as he was on the MW he went into L3. He was swiftly undertaken by me in L2 (admittedly I was a bit of a knob for doing this) to prove a point.
Why is L2/L3 the default position for these wkers?
teqai (okay qashqai) yesterday morning who was plonked in L2 like a prize dick when we arrived at a roundabout and he suddenly realised that he wanted to turn off at the slip road (which isn't possible from L2). He nearly wiped me out as he moved over without so much as looking.Not only that he then crawled down the slip road in L2 despite no other cars being around. FFS get in the right lane you knob!
Several miles later I met him again on a DC - again he's in L2 with little other traffic around, entering a 3 lane MW. As soon as he was on the MW he went into L3. He was swiftly undertaken by me in L2 (admittedly I was a bit of a knob for doing this) to prove a point.
Why is L2/L3 the default position for these w
kers?e21Mark said:
I pucker up and blow a kiss. Nope, he's still shouting, so I blow him another kiss and wink invitingly. Nothing, not even a smile. Maybe I'm just not his type?
Some responses are timeless classics, it's not incendiary like shouting back "What?! I don't speak Polish", it's not inviting escalation like just straight laughing at them.Blowing kisses is definitely one of the better responses and always will be.
AJXX1 said:
Why is L2/L3 the default position for these wkers?
Nissan quashqai drivers are the first rung on the ladder. They can level up to become juke drivers, the best from that crop are given Citroen Picasso's and the cream of the crop, the very finest are given Vauxhall zafiras.kers?ShaunTheSheep said:
AJXX1 said:
Why is L2/L3 the default position for these wkers?
Nissan quashqai drivers are the first rung on the ladder. They can level up to become juke drivers, the best from that crop are given Citroen Picasso's and the cream of the crop, the very finest are given Vauxhall zafiras.kers?TBH if I was driving a Zafira I'd be angry too.
I don't get the number of people who upon first pregnancy purchase an enormous people wagon or 4x4. There was a bloke who lived down my road whose wife badgered and brow beat him into selling his 730d to buy a Citroen Picasso.... as if a 730d can't fit a child seat and pram.
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