One single thing that makes you think "knob"

[masermartin]

Killer2005 said:

People who block junctions in traffic.

There may be a green light but if the junctions not clear why the hell block other lanes and making the whole situation worse

A bus did this in front of me this evening, they were turning right out of a traffic light-controlled t-junction and ended up stranded across the road, causing chaos. No concept of forward planning.

I had a day of it today, though...

1. The kind of knob who buys an M6 for, what, 30k, and then crashes it through the local Halfords to stick random bits of plastic on it (seen in Slough)

2. The kind of knob who sits in the outside lane of a dual carriageway in a people carrier having a conversation with their passenger, 10mph below the speed limit, with an empty inside lane.

3. Constable Knob who was sat immediately behind said vehicle in a marked Astra for 1 mile or more and:
- failed to do anything about said prat who in my non-affiliated opinion, was DWDCA in front, and yet
- was themself driving dangerously close to said prat in what I can only assume was a frustrated "hurry the fk up or get out of the way" gesture. If only there were some police about, eh?

4. The kind of knob in front of you who goes onto a roundabout indicating right, but practically stops on the roundabout just as you are beginning to accelerate away towards the straight ahead exit, for no reason whatsoever (no babies, old ladies or cute furry animals ran out).

So, uh, yeah, more than one single thing today.

[james0]

johnny-b said:

People who lean over in the drivers seat when making a turn it's a car you knob not a motorbike it does not respond to your body position

I do this in some of the more wallowy vehicles I have driven. Possibly to counteract seasickness/fear. Decent handling car with a decent seat, I dont feel the urge to move about.

[Rostfritt]

pops and bangs said:

People who don't indicate are knobs.

Whether it's someone on a motoway that randomly pulls infront of you or those that randomly stop infront of you and then suddenly turn without an indicator in sight.

They really irritate the hell out of me.

Edited by pops and bangs on Tuesday 2nd October 17:32

I can see a roundabout from my window. It is surprising how many people indicate left 2 exits before theirs. I really cannot see how it is that difficult.

Also the taxi driver who sailed through a red light as I was crossing earlier. An apologetic shrug doesn't make it better, you should not be driving, let alone professionally.

[g3org3y]

Driving back to Colchester on the A12 last Sunday night - little hatchback sitting in middle lane 60mph (left lane clear). No surprises there.

As I passed I noted said MLM was driving with sidelights and foglights (no dipped beam).

Perhaps they had a bilateral headlight failure. I suspect they were just a fking idiot.

[e21Mark]

Rostfritt said:

Also the taxi driver who sailed through a red light as I was crossing earlier. An apologetic shrug doesn't make it better, you should not be driving, let alone professionally.

Taxi drivers around here are a law unto themselves. I suspect they're not much different elsewhere either. They seem to think being a 'professional driver' entitles them to how and wherever they like?

I had to get a cab in Essex a few weeks back, as there was a problem with the trains. It was a stereotypical 10 year old people carrier but first time the driver hit the brakes you could hear the unmistakable sound of metal on metal where the brake pads were simply worn away to the backing plates. I said to the driver about it and he said he was trying not to use the brakes unless he really needed to! Incredible.

I got out and got another cab.

[Hudson]

Coming back up the M25 last night we had:

• a Kuga, that after cutting me up on the slip road, spent the rest of the journey tailgating and constantly breaking behind someone despite the other 4 lanes being clear
• Golf and a micra attempting to mate in L2, again no one else about so i cruised past in L1 - cue flashing lights and general dribbling rage
• a truck overtaking a truck overtaking a truck (truckception) forcing everyone else into L4
• "Oh st thats my junction, let me just swerve across 3 lanes of traffic without indicating and brake-test the poor sucker i just forced my way infront of"

All this happened in the wet, in the space of 5 junctions. I want guns fitted to my car.

[Liquid Knight]

Ha! The young whipper snapper who annoyed me yesterday is now officially "Chair Boy". Someone else has pointed it out and the nickname was decided over a coffee fueled debate in the office. I arrived to the news so I'm not even a knob for coming up with it.

[e600]

Marked police cars doing 69 mph in the left hand lane of a motorway whilst lanes 2 and 3 have a 2 mile tailback for fear of overtaking

[playalistic]

e600 said:

Marked police cars doing 69 mph in the left hand lane of a motorway whilst lanes 2 and 3 have a 2 mile tailback for fear of overtaking

To be clear, the knobs in this instance are the ones who are too dumb to overtake I presume (and hope)?

[DrTre]

Hudson said:

• Golf and a micra attempting to mate in L2, again no one else about so i cruised past in L1 - cue flashing lights and general dribbling rage

Really weirdly I don't' think I've ever been flashed or anything when I've driven in L1 as it's intended....then again, I suppose I don't check.

M40 was horrendous on Sunday eve down to London, and the thing that was causing it was "congestion".

In just one "transit" in L1, over the length of at least half a mile I went past 24 cars (who were in L2, and roughly the same number in L3 I guess) and no one batted an eyelid.

I can't figure out where this congestion comes from, really I can't.

[jimmy the hat]

Hudson said:

* a Kuga, that after cutting me up on the slip road, spent the rest of the journey tailgating and constantly breaking behind someone despite the other 4 lanes being clear

White Kuga? Only I found one tailgating an astra van going up the outside lane of the A12 last night. Neither of them felt like moving over, even after I'd sat in the inside lane and flashed to let them know it was empty. All that achieved was Kuga man dropping back when he was actually overtaking to slow me down even more. Which was convenient actually because once he cleared what he was actually overtaking and failed to return to the left I proved that I can accelerate much quicker than him and the gap in front of him was mine while I waited for the astramax to do the same (cue high beams). I soon left them both behind, me on the inside of now three lanes and both stayed in the outside lane overtaking absolutely nothing for as long as I could still see them. Pair of knobs.

Obviously I could and probably should have waited for a gap big enough to do them both but I'd just driven from Basildon to Lakeside, been all round there and was on my way back past Boreham when he started playing silly buggers so my knob threshold was exceeded and I had to join in. Hands up, it would probably be me that got busted although I would love to think otherwise.

Cheers, Jim

[Big Rod]

jimmy the hat said:

White Kuga? Only I found one tailgating an astra van going up the outside lane of the A12 last night. Neither of them felt like moving over, even after I'd sat in the inside lane and flashed to let them know it was empty. All that achieved was Kuga man dropping back when he was actually overtaking to slow me down even more. Which was convenient actually because once he cleared what he was actually overtaking and failed to return to the left I proved that I can accelerate much quicker than him and the gap in front of him was mine while I waited for the astramax to do the same (cue high beams). I soon left them both behind, me on the inside of now three lanes and both stayed in the outside lane overtaking absolutely nothing for as long as I could still see them. Pair of knobs.

Obviously I could and probably should have waited for a gap big enough to do them both but I'd just driven from Basildon to Lakeside, been all round there and was on my way back past Boreham when he started playing silly buggers so my knob threshold was exceeded and I had to join in. Hands up, it would probably be me that got busted although I would love to think otherwise.

Cheers, Jim

I just love doing that in the XJR, (when it's working at least!), because I know that no matter how hard they try, (unless it's something a bit 'tasty'!), that they've no chance of closing the gap quick enough. Best to utilise the element of surprise though.

I am bewildered why, when I try the same in my Pajero, (which looks like a derelict outhouse), they risk closing the gap when it'd be fairly obvious that I really don't care if I get another scratch on it!

Absolute c*@ts the lot of them!

[Hudson]

jimmy the hat said:

White Kuga?

It was However this prize dickcheese was on the south mimms roundabout (A1M Hatfield etc), after nearly ramming a motorbike and the brake testing me, he went on to the tttery described above.

[Crow555]

e21Mark said:

Taxi drivers around here are a law unto themselves. I suspect they're not much different elsewhere either. They seem to think being a 'professional driver' entitles them to how and wherever they like?

I had to get a cab in Essex a few weeks back, as there was a problem with the trains. It was a stereotypical 10 year old people carrier but first time the driver hit the brakes you could hear the unmistakable sound of metal on metal where the brake pads were simply worn away to the backing plates. I said to the driver about it and he said he was trying not to use the brakes unless he really needed to! Incredible.

I got out and got another cab.

I'm of the same opinion of taxi drivers. One of them nearly killed a good friend of mine and wrote off her car after running a red light in the early morning at a cross roads in Belfast.

I used to fly to Leeds every Monday and the company at Leeds Bradford Airport is probably one of the worst I've ever traveled with. The worst was a chap who was flying along these country lanes and only noticed at the last minute a crossroads junction with a major road. He emergency stopped and ended up stopping with the front half of the car on the major road. After that, I phoned a local leeds company and got them to pick me up instead.

[jimmy the hat]

Hudson said:

jimmy the hat said:

White Kuga?

It was However this prize dickcheese was on the south mimms roundabout (A1M Hatfield etc), after nearly ramming a motorbike and the brake testing me, he went on to the tttery described above.

Well, if it's not him I think we need to start stereotyping white Kuga drivers.

[Countdown]

The knob in the 5- series that HAD to park right outside the doors of Asda Rawtenstall this morning, rather than 10 yards away in a car parking space like everybody else. Not just wkerishly lazy but stupid as well, given that it's right next to the trolley bay.

[jimmy the hat]

Big Rod said:

I just love doing that in the XJR, (when it's working at least!), because I know that no matter how hard they try, (unless it's something a bit 'tasty'!), that they've no chance of closing the gap quick enough. Best to utilise the element of surprise though.

I am bewildered why, when I try the same in my Pajero, (which looks like a derelict outhouse), they risk closing the gap when it'd be fairly obvious that I really don't care if I get another scratch on it!

Absolute c*@ts the lot of them!

Ah, mine's somewhere in between which explains why they think they can close the gap. Which of course makes it all the funnier when I sail past on the inside with the "I'm sorry, what is it you think you're doing?" look on. It's even better when they really have to try, knock it down a gear and everything, because having to nail it and thrape the crap out of their motor just highlights how big a gap there is in front and to the side of them and how much they really should have just got out of the way before they were told to (which they ignored or inferred as questioning their masculinity, or whatever) and before they were undertaken (which really should be impossible).

But still, undertaking's the work of the devil

[anonymous-user]

jimmy the hat said:

Hudson said:

jimmy the hat said:

White Kuga?

It was However this prize dickcheese was on the south mimms roundabout (A1M Hatfield etc), after nearly ramming a motorbike and the brake testing me, he went on to the tttery described above.

Well, if it's not him I think we need to start stereotyping white Kuga drivers.

Not a 12-plater, by any chance? (ETA about 3pm ish?)

Had the pleasures of him yesterday coming along the Brentwood Bypass, he decided I pulled in front of him too early (EASY 50m away, quite probably more), he then drove along polishing my back bumper for me, I pulled back in to L1 after I had completed my overtakes (from L3), to find myself blocked in by him by the time I came to overtake the next truck. He was right up against the offside of my car, matching speeds exactly. No difficulty to brake and let him past, but yeah what a prize, de-bked, essex tt.

[elvismiggell]

OpulentBob said:

find myself blocked in by him by the time I came to overtake the next truck. He was right up against the offside of my car, matching speeds exactly. No difficulty to brake and let him past,

This is annoying me a lot at the moment. Seems to be happening far too much on the M25.

Like you say it's really no trouble to just brake and go round them, but it's still infuriatingly poor road manners, and in my view constitutes not anticipating a hazard or completing an overtake in a timely manner. Or something.

[P Nuts]

The bloke in the Range Rover this morning, in 3 lanes of traffic who was speeding, undertaking, bullying road users out the way. I had to laugh as he has his hazard lights on - which i found a very fitting indication as to what he was!! my only eplanatin i could see for his manners was he genuinely needed to get somewhere urgently (but at the cost of others and his life?