Wednesday 5th August 2015

Austin Metro Vanden Plas 500: YKYWT

Delivery miles leather and (plastic) walnut Vanden Plas Metro goes up for auction - would you?

---

At what point does terminal naffness morph into kitsch cool? I'm old enough to remember Metros when they were 10 a penny. Indeed, I even learned to drive in one. You'd think that alone would leave me generously disposed towards the things, especially given that they're one of those cars that has gone from ubiquity to obscurity in seemingly the blink of an eye.

On point numberplate

History has not been kind to the old Metro but I think there's something cool about the basic ones like the example my mum had. It was a tough old thing, that's for sure. Had to be given the vicious hill starts my stepdad delighted in throwing at me in those hesitant few days after my 17th birthday. That fug of smouldering clutch at the top of Crownest Road in Bingley has probably just about cleared by now.

Can this 1983 Vanden Plas 500 ever find redemption? It could well be the sole survivor of a breed of tarted up Metros pedalled - as I remember - by the grey slip-on/blue rinse brigade at 15mph. Everywhere. Any Vanden Plas probably has a few cobwebs to blow out but this one more than most - yes, it's one of those weird survivors emerging dumbfounded into a weird sci-fi futurescape, dwarfed by bloated, high-tech versions of the car it was meant to replace. Poor thing will be very confused if it does ever venture out on to the roads of 2015.

Ooh, it'll be like driving a Snickers. Or Marathon

The second of just 500 built, there is likely no exaggeration in auction house Classic Car Auctions' boast that the car is "unique", having barely turned a wheel in over three decades in Birmingham's Patrick collection with just one registered owner from new. Given how common a sight Metros once were it's funny to think you're probably now more likely to see a Ferrari 250 GTO out on the road than one of these. Something to feel sorry about or worthy of little more than a shrug? You decide but if you are in the position to be seeking a Metro to "bubble wrap for the future" as CCA has it this could be the one.

There's always something a little weird about these timewarp cars when they do appear in public again. Is this one odd enough to be cool, purely by virtue of having survived? Let the court of PH opinion rule! And if you fancy a punt on the car it'll be going under the hammer - figurative, not literal - at CCA's CarFest sale at Jody Scheckter's Laverstock Park Farm on August 29.

---

AUSTIN METRO VANDEN PLAS 500
Price: For auction, no reserve
Why you should: It's somehow survived
Why you shouldn't: See above

View the advert here.

 

[alpha channel]

Don't know why but I would in a heartbeat (nostalgia probably) if I had the space. My first faltering steps in driving had all been in Austin cars, first a Maxi that was sat in my Nana and Grandads drive when I could barely reach the pedals, changing gear twiddling the steering wheel. Then it was on to a metallic light blue Austin Metro, same again but I could reach the pedals and got it trundling up and down the drive eventually.

My first two cars were Austin Metros which shuttled me to and from College then University, happy times (there's the nostalgia kick again). Came across my second Metro (E388 ATY)in the scrapyard (underneath had rotted out otherwise looked brand new externally) when my father and me went hunting for something (can't remember exactly what now). It was a good car, still had it when the engine in the 205 went tits up, used it to shuttle the engine over to my Grandads garage.

Holds a strange allure for me.