Cringeworthy things us blokes say

[Evangelion]

I was reading 'Classic From The Mrs' just now and got to thinking, "Why don't we have a male equivalent?" Just to redress the balance you understand.

To start the ball rolling, here's a good'un from a young lady at work:

She'd had a bit of a spat with her boyfriend (we needn't go into what about), and a bit later he came in, looking a little sheepish, sidled up to her, apologised, gave her a big kiss and cuddle, and looked into her eyes and said, "I love you, Holly."

Only problem is, her name's Roxy. Holly is her flatmate.

[stuartmmcfc]

"I promise I won't come in your [insert desired location] "

[Jimmy Recard]

"I want to know you."

[ChemicalChaos]

"Sure, I'll drive across the country to where you are to meet up [and end up being stood up]"

Twice, I've made that mistake

[rouge59]

Any man who 'pulls the trigger' on anything other than a gun is a bellend.

[condor]

I love you within a few minutes of meeting.

[Scousefella]

You sister likes it that way.

[Mini1275]

ChemicalChaos said:

"Sure, I'll drive across the country to where you are to meet up [and end up being stood up]"

Twice, I've made that mistake

I can only wonder why.

[wiliferus]

rouge59 said:

Any man who 'pulls the trigger' on anything other than a gun is a bellend.

This, this and thrice this! Currently the most cringeworthy PH in thing to say.

[Phil Dicky]

wiliferus said:

rouge59 said:

Any man who 'pulls the trigger' on anything other than a gun is a bellend.

This, this and thrice this! Currently the most cringeworthy PH in thing to say.

God yeah..hate this saying

[BS30]

stuartmmcfc said:

"I promise I won't come in your [insert desired location] "

Sister.

[43034]

rouge59 said:

Any man who 'pulls the trigger' on anything other than a gun is a bellend.

That.


And people who say 'This'.

[Scousefella]

anonymous said:

[redacted]

Yup, same here, also when I use the clippers to give my head the once over I always ask Mrs Scouse to come and "Finish me Off" and "Sort me Out" with heavily veiled looks and totally innuendo laden. Never leads to anything though.

[toasty]

43034 said:

That.


And people who say 'This'.

CLIVE:
Yeah. This "and" that, you know, s- .....
DEREK:
fking "AND" this "AND" that "AND" that .....
CLIVE:
"This" gives me the horn, "that" gives me the horn.
DEREK:
"This"-, and "that" gi-, oh fking st!
CLIVE:
If I see a sentence which reads "this and that" .....
DEREK:
Oh, fking "and", mate!
CLIVE:
..... I get such a fking hard-on I don't know what to fking do.

[medieval]

No, I'm just going to look at the car, I'm not intending to buy it.....

[big dub]

"Killing the game"

Oh please do fk off

[Ari]

Pick pretty much any post from the Aintree thread where the PH Adonis Club desperately try and outdo each other with just how much they wouldn't have sex with women in random photos in the vain hope that someone will believe they actually have that choice.

[rog007]

43034 said:

rouge59 said:

Any man who 'pulls the trigger' on anything other than a gun is a bellend.

That.


And people who say 'This'.

[SB7]

"I would smash/ruin/destroy that".

No, really you wouldn't. Unless you are a psychopathic sex offender, which I suppose is possible.

[BuzzBravado]

"I'm running a stage 2 blah blah blah"

No mate you aren't running anything. You have fitted parts you aren't running them.