White van man - rules of the road explained
Discussion
26. I will choose any lane I like to avoid a queue when approaching a roundabout
27. I can park on zebra crossings when I need to pop in to the shop to collect my fags
28. When filling up at a petrol station I will likely wait a good 20 minutes at the pump while my passengers buy their nutritional daily snap, sample the days page 3 in the Sun newspaper and check out the telly for this evening in the Radio Times
27. I can park on zebra crossings when I need to pop in to the shop to collect my fags
28. When filling up at a petrol station I will likely wait a good 20 minutes at the pump while my passengers buy their nutritional daily snap, sample the days page 3 in the Sun newspaper and check out the telly for this evening in the Radio Times
vxr8mate said:
26. I will choose any lane I like to avoid a queue when approaching a roundabout
27. I can park on zebra crossings when I need to pop in to the shop to collect my fags
28. When filling up at a petrol station I will likely wait a good 20 minutes at the pump while my passengers buy their nutritional daily snap, sample the days page 3 in the Sun newspaper and check out the telly for this evening in the Radio Times
I would like to take issue with the majority of posts on this thread, for a start all our vans (3) are black, and and if it was made known to me that any of our blokes were reading the radio times they would get there cards.27. I can park on zebra crossings when I need to pop in to the shop to collect my fags
28. When filling up at a petrol station I will likely wait a good 20 minutes at the pump while my passengers buy their nutritional daily snap, sample the days page 3 in the Sun newspaper and check out the telly for this evening in the Radio Times
Over 200k covered so far this financial year and 0 accidents and 0 claims....are they just lucky or are the majority of you white collar w
kers just talking bks ?MarshPhantom said:
vxr8mate said:
26. I will choose any lane I like to avoid a queue when approaching a roundabout
What kind of fool doesn't do that anyway? Van driver or not."I will randomly join a queue whenever I see one, even if there is a perfectly good lane that I could be using."
Actually based on today that does happen. At 2.30 today I drove down a Bus Lane which is active M-F 7am til 10am and 4pm til 7pm. Amazing how angry people seemed to be at me not joining the back of the 1/2 mile queue.
Nik Gnashers said:
As regards parking, I'll bet most van drivers know all of the rules and you don't, because they have to know them as part of their driver training.
How do you think products and goods actually get to the shops / your house huh ?
Grow up, and stop being pathetic.
Van parking is never catered for anywhere, I can't even go to my local town without parking a mile away, 15 minute walk at least if I can get a space, because my van is too tall/long to park in any of the multi story car parks.How do you think products and goods actually get to the shops / your house huh ?
Grow up, and stop being pathetic.
Edited by Nik Gnashers on Sunday 11th January 20:47
Same time, carrying a lot of tools back and forth to the van is a pain in the arse.
vxr8mate said:
26. I will choose any lane I like to avoid a queue when approaching a roundabout
26. One of my favourites, just being smart if the right hand lane is free and you want to come off first exit, blast down the right handside, do a lap of the roundabout come off first exit. You would hate my one traffic light trick on one bit of road. One set go red, you can turn off left to the road next to it, then turn back right through the green lights that you were going to stop for, and then through the next set of greens, which would be red if you waited at the original lights, but I do that regardless of being in the van or not.When you drive a van for a long time with uncomfortable seats, no air con, s
t radio, no power and speed limited you soon lose the will to drive properly.pits said:
26. One of my favourites, just being smart if the right hand lane is free and you want to come off first exit, blast down the right handside, do a lap of the roundabout come off first exit. You would hate my one traffic light trick on one bit of road. One set go red, you can turn off left to the road next to it, then turn back right through the green lights that you were going to stop for, and then through the next set of greens, which would be red if you waited at the original lights, but I do that regardless of being in the van or not.
When you drive a van for a long time with uncomfortable seats, no air con, st radio, no power and speed limited you soon lose the will to drive properly.
You haven't lost the will. What you said was sensible use of the available road space. Only a muppet who couldn't read the road would not do what you did.When you drive a van for a long time with uncomfortable seats, no air con, s
t radio, no power and speed limited you soon lose the will to drive properly.The same with timed bus lanes. Using them when they are not enforceable is NOT a bad thing.
During the evening, or when it's dark - and preferably when it's also drizzling or foggy - I will exercise my right to park on the nearside verge, but facing oncoming traffic, but with my headlights still on, and blazing out and blinding everything coming my way.
My tiny, fish-like brain never, ever considers switching the lights down to sidelamps when I am in such a position - and the fact that it's even contrary to the Highway Code, is about as relevant and interesting to me, as the exams that I didn't pass at school...
My tiny, fish-like brain never, ever considers switching the lights down to sidelamps when I am in such a position - and the fact that it's even contrary to the Highway Code, is about as relevant and interesting to me, as the exams that I didn't pass at school...
pits said:
You would hate my one traffic light trick on one bit of road. One set go red, you can turn off left to the road next to it, then turn back right through the green lights that you were going to stop for, and then through the next set of greens, which would be red if you waited at the original lights, but I do that regardless of being in the van or not.
That sounds very like the layout leading out of Gateshead to the Tyne bridge? If so, you're not alone with that!Ray Luxury-Yacht said:
During the evening, or when it's dark - and preferably when it's also drizzling or foggy - I will exercise my right to park on the nearside verge, but facing oncoming traffic, but with my headlights still on, and blazing out and blinding everything coming my way.
My tiny, fish-like brain never, ever considers switching the lights down to sidelamps when I am in such a position - and the fact that it's even contrary to the Highway Code, is about as relevant and interesting to me, as the exams that I didn't pass at school...
This is extremely annoying, but sadly not confined to white van man. Taxis are a persistent offender, and plenty of "non-professional" drivers do this.My tiny, fish-like brain never, ever considers switching the lights down to sidelamps when I am in such a position - and the fact that it's even contrary to the Highway Code, is about as relevant and interesting to me, as the exams that I didn't pass at school...
scarecrow said:
30. My van is the fastest vehicle on the road. No matter how fast you go I will always be able to go 10mph faster especially down the motorway.
30a. I'm a poorly endowed, mid size family saloon car driver and am unable to cope with a van overtaking me, so I will speed up by at least 15 mph to try to prevent this on Amy motorway or dual carriageway. If I succeed then I'll drop back to my original speed and we'll play this game all day long. If I fail, then I'll either look at my speedo and then you as you pass me, or will pretend to play with the SatNav / radio to hide my embarassment. When I get home, I will beat my wife up in frustration at my failure at being male. LoonR1 said:
30a. I'm a poorly endowed, mid size family saloon car driver and am unable to cope with a van overtaking me, so I will speed up by at least 15 mph to try to prevent this on Amy motorway or dual carriageway. If I succeed then I'll drop back to my original speed and we'll play this game all day long. If I fail, then I'll either look at my speedo and then you as you pass me, or will pretend to play with the SatNav / radio to hide my embarassment. When I get home, I will beat my wife up in frustration at my failure at being male.
Is this some sort of confession?LoonR1 said:
30a. I'm a poorly endowed, mid size family saloon car driver and am unable to cope with a van overtaking me, so I will speed up by at least 15 mph to try to prevent this on Amy motorway or dual carriageway. If I succeed then I'll drop back to my original speed and we'll play this game all day long. If I fail, then I'll either look at my speedo and then you as you pass me, or will pretend to play with the SatNav / radio to hide my embarassment. When I get home, I will beat my wife up in frustration at my failure at being male.
30b. I'm a poorly endowed, mid size family saloon car driver who also has a white van and a litre bike. I go out on a Sunday morning on my bike and use my immense acceleration to pass any car in front of me because cars are slow. I then reach some bends and hold up the cars I've passed because I'm rubbish at riding around corners. When I get to the pub I brag to my mates about how I was the fastest thing on the road on my thou' then go home and beat up my wife, kids and mother in law.We can play this game all day long!
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