Bank Employee's inappropriate relationship with customer

Bank Employee's inappropriate relationship with customer

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Riknos

Original Poster:

4,700 posts

203 months

Thursday 28th May 2015
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I'm not sure if anything here is illegal hence posting here - hopefully somebody can shed some light.

Approx 5 years ago, my Grandparents sold their second home for approx £800k I believe and walked into their local brand of X bank and deposited a big fat cheque for the money. They already had a second home they were now living in permanently and had prior savings and a good pension.

Most of their family is 5+ hours away, except for their son. It was around the very time they deposited this cheque that one of the bank employees became very friendly with them, I believe she is potentially a manager/assistant manager of the branch. Over the course of the next few months she would offer her assistance and call them to speak with them, offering her husband to help with chores around the house. Over time this developed into frequent visits, husband (call his A) and wife (call her J) visiting and bringing their daughter (M). A would turn up at their house and offer his services of gardening, general jobs around the house, tidying etc, and they would offer him money in exchange which he would refuse. After a while A lost his job so when the offers of money were presented they would be accepted. He was paid the going rate of a gardener, fuel money for giving them lifts etc.

My Grandparents whilst being of a mindset that they know what they're doing they weren't exactly all there upstairs and are very difficult people to talk to / communicate with etc. A and J eventually got their child to start calling my grandparents "nan and granddad" My grandparents helped them out such as giving A their old car, then when that broke down not long after they then gave him some money to buy a new car. They even changed their will at some point to include J in it for a 5 figure sum. This was later changed back after my Granddad's brother convinced him to as he didn't trust them. My Granddad was the sensible one and my Grandmother often lives in her own world.

I don't understand why these people would have randomly picked my grandparents to befriend - as far as I'm aware A at least has his own parents still so it's not like a surrogate thing, and even if it was I still think the relationship is inappropriate.

Is there anything we can do? I have thought about writing to J's manager at the bank but I'm not sure we have a leg to stand on?

Also - There is another issue of that apparently my Granddad's Will could not be honoured properly as there was approx £100k missing from his finances. He was always careful with money and still had all his marbles until the end, my uncle is saying he must have lost track of his spending but yes perhaps of a few thousands but 100k? They didn't go on any holidays, buy any luxury items or anything for that matter. All they've done for the last few years is go out for meals and pay A & J money to help with chores and help out with the car etc.

Would we be able to hire an accountant to look into it for example?

Appreciate any advise, thanks.

carreauchompeur

17,830 posts

203 months

Thursday 28th May 2015
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Very difficult. As someone of a suspicious mindset I would regard this as financial grooming and wouldn't be surprised if that was the reason for the bank employee losing his job.

As a first point of call I would consider trying to find as much documentation as possible then having a look through it for any irregularities and large payments.

Feel free to PM me if you want to discuss further.

TooMany2cvs

29,008 posts

125 months

Thursday 28th May 2015
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Riknos said:
Approx 5 years ago, my Grandparents sold their second home for approx £800k I believe and walked into their local brand of X bank and deposited a big fat cheque for the money...

I don't understand why these people would have randomly picked my grandparents to befriend
You're dropping some very heavy hints that you think you DO know exactly why...

Riknos said:
Also - There is another issue of that apparently my Granddad's Will could not be honoured properly as there was approx £100k missing from his finances. He was always careful with money and still had all his marbles until the end, my uncle is saying he must have lost track of his spending but yes perhaps of a few thousands but 100k? They didn't go on any holidays, buy any luxury items or anything for that matter. All they've done for the last few years is go out for meals and pay A & J money to help with chores and help out with the car etc.

Would we be able to hire an accountant to look into it for example?
Of course you can. But unless you've got the documentation for the accountant to look through, they won't be able to do anything. And, if you have, they can't do much more than you can yourself.

Let's say the account does show a bunch of withdrawals or transfers for substantial sums. What then?

iambeowulf

712 posts

171 months

Thursday 28th May 2015
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Sounds like sour grapes to me.

Family not that close to family member who then gets close to someone not in the family circle. If there was no money involved you and your family wouldn't give a toss.

Just because non of the family connected with them doesn't mean they can't have friends who do and friends usually help eachother out financially.

If imagine that when the will goes to probate your family will be fighting for years over who has what. Sorry. Seen it many times before.

Sheepshanks

32,530 posts

118 months

Thursday 28th May 2015
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:shrug: If the family is 5hrs away I'd be glad of someone on hand to take care of them. They must have a million+ - who cares if they spent a bit on the people helping them out?

ralphrj

3,508 posts

190 months

Thursday 28th May 2015
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carreauchompeur said:
Very difficult. As someone of a suspicious mindset I would regard this as financial grooming and wouldn't be surprised if that was the reason for the bank employee losing his job.
If I've read it right it wasn't the bank employee that lost their job but the husband of the bank employee who was being offered as a handyman.

Riknos

Original Poster:

4,700 posts

203 months

Thursday 28th May 2015
quotequote all
iambeowulf said:
Sounds like sour grapes to me.

Family not that close to family member who then gets close to someone not in the family circle. If there was no money involved you and your family wouldn't give a toss.

Just because non of the family connected with them doesn't mean they can't have friends who do and friends usually help eachother out financially.

If imagine that when the will goes to probate your family will be fighting for years over who has what. Sorry. Seen it many times before.
As usual - there's always some cock on this website who likes to be a keyboard warrior.

My Granddad died and I'm worried about my Grandma as she is on her own and too nice and trusting and people take advantage of her. She got mugged in the post office the other day after drawing her pension when someone asked her where the birthday cards are and she went looking for them before she closed her purse. She's 86 and vulnerable - go be a cock somewhere else.

ralphrj said:
carreauchompeur said:
Very difficult. As someone of a suspicious mindset I would regard this as financial grooming and wouldn't be surprised if that was the reason for the bank employee losing his job.
If I've read it right it wasn't the bank employee that lost their job but the husband of the bank employee who was being offered as a handyman.
Yes that's correct J still works in the bank it's A who lost his job and does chores for them for money.

The very day my Granddad died J tried to sell them some managed bank service package to take care of all of his finances - luckily my Grandmother isn't so gullible that she fell for it but it is worrying.


TheBear

1,940 posts

245 months

Thursday 28th May 2015
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I don't think it sounds like sour grapes. The questions to be asked and answered would be why did a bank employee initially offer their help for house hold chores to a customer? How did that come about? Is that a normal service to offer? Does that employee offer that help on a regular basis to other customers? Have they declared this relationship to their boss considering their position and considering it has lead to financial gain and also considering that their own financial position was potentially difficult when the husband lost his job? Why has the employee befriended a person from a completely different age generation? How far are they travelling to see them?

The employee could be a relationship manager if it is a premier account. I don't know if that makes a difference or could explain some of the above?

If they have declared this and the bank is happy and your relative is happy with this then you have nothing to go on.

For me, I would be very suspicious. Not because I might lose a bit of money but because someone in a position of financial trust is potentially taking advantage of a vulnerable person and I would want to bottom that out.

I would also put money on the bank being deeply uncomfortable with this if made aware and I think she could be on a very sticky wicket and I would imagine that her accepting money would be viewed very dimly indeed and would result in some form of disciplinary action, if not a sacking.

Edited by TheBear on Thursday 28th May 11:26

Sheepshanks

32,530 posts

118 months

Thursday 28th May 2015
quotequote all
Riknos said:
The very day my Granddad died J tried to sell them some managed bank service package to take care of all of his finances - luckily my Grandmother isn't so gullible that she fell for it but it is worrying.
Perhaps that's what she needs? Unsurprisingly, banks do target people with money - if I let my current account balance with NatWest go up they'll be on the 'phone wanting to discuss it, and I'm not talking about a big amount. I imagine the kind of attention a 7 figure sum would get would be immense.

Where are your grandmothers children in all this? Someone needs to take control of the situation.

carreauchompeur

17,830 posts

203 months

Thursday 28th May 2015
quotequote all
Ignore the others talking about sour grapes.

A bank employee befriending an elderly person who pays in a large amount of money and then embarking on a personal relationship is not appropriate.

In terms of actually dealing with this, the chance has passed. However your concerns should be reported to the bank.

Vaud

50,289 posts

154 months

Thursday 28th May 2015
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carreauchompeur said:
However your concerns should be reported to the bank.
This. Allow them to take the action they deem appropriate. It does not sound right.

oldbanger

4,316 posts

237 months

Thursday 28th May 2015
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I would echo other posters saying to report this to the bank. All banks have internal fraud teams to deal with this kind of thing and they will be keen to look into it. If it's all innocent, then fine, but if not then there may be other victims too.

Jasandjules

69,825 posts

228 months

Thursday 28th May 2015
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I would certainly write to the bank and ask them to set out if they can establish where the 100k has gone. I would be inclined to give them the background and note that J&A are not being accused of anything but you are aware that they were friends with Grandparents thus the bank could potentially ask them too...

HotJambalaya

2,023 posts

179 months

Thursday 28th May 2015
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with regards to the 100k, thats gone. You by your own admission say that he had all his marbles until the end. If he did indeed gift them some money, thats that really. Maybe they'd get his by some IHT, no doubt there'd be some disciplinary action with the staff, but that 100k ain't coming back. I suppose if you wanted to push it and it started being a criminal investigation/audit the bank could look at the employees accounts to see if deposits were similar in time and amount to your granddads withdrawals. If you're lucky perhaps they'd just persuaded your grandad to invest in some unsuitable financial products and you might squeeze a few quid back from the bank.

With regards to the on going relationship, in my view, it is unprofessional, unsavoury and clearly predatory. It may be worth speaking to a company like help the aged, or Age Uk with particular reference to this type of predatory behaviour. However at the VERY least I would be speaking to someone high up in the bank, and I mean above the branch manager. If its all happening as you've said it is disgraceful.

As I said, IF. Have you personally witnessed a lot of this? Been there when they've brought their kids over? If so, how were A&J around you? I ask because there certainly is (in general not with you specifically since I dont know them) a bit of a feeling among the elderly to attention seek, so make a situation like this so that their kids 'check in' on them more, more visits etc. Any chance of that happening? If you can answer a RESOUNDING no to that question, my view is to go nuclear. Quickly.


superlightr

12,842 posts

262 months

Thursday 28th May 2015
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write to the bank expressing your concern and ask them to investigate. Get an accountant to audit the spending to see where the money has gone to.

TooMany2cvs

29,008 posts

125 months

Thursday 28th May 2015
quotequote all
carreauchompeur said:
A bank employee befriending an elderly person who pays in a large amount of money and then embarking on a personal relationship is not appropriate.
There's some rather massive assumptions going on.

For all you - and the OP - know, the G/F and J had a very natural and friendly relationship, which lead to J genuinely trying to help out a friend that she just happened to have met at work.

OP - if you're so concerned about your grandmother, have you suggested she comes and lives with you? Or, even, do you phone her every day and go to see her every weekend?

HotJambalaya

2,023 posts

179 months

Thursday 28th May 2015
quotequote all
TooMany2cvs said:
There's some rather massive assumptions going on.

For all you - and the OP - know, the G/F and J had a very natural and friendly relationship, which lead to J genuinely trying to help out a friend that she just happened to have met at work.

OP - if you're so concerned about your grandmother, have you suggested she comes and lives with you? Or, even, do you phone her every day and go to see her every weekend?
Whilst true that is unfortunately a big coincidence, particularly since they appear to have become friends after the £800k deposit.... Just depends how big a believer you are in coincidence really. I'm not, especially since money has started changing hands...

Vaud

50,289 posts

154 months

Thursday 28th May 2015
quotequote all
TooMany2cvs said:
There's some rather massive assumptions going on.

For all you - and the OP - know, the G/F and J had a very natural and friendly relationship, which lead to J genuinely trying to help out a friend that she just happened to have met at work.
Sure, but there are guidelines and rules governing this. The timing of the friendship and the access to privileged information by the staff member would, from the information available, warrant investigation.

Hackney

6,811 posts

207 months

Thursday 28th May 2015
quotequote all
TooMany2cvs said:
carreauchompeur said:
A bank employee befriending an elderly person who pays in a large amount of money and then embarking on a personal relationship is not appropriate.
There's some rather massive assumptions going on.

For all you - and the OP - know, the G/F and J had a very natural and friendly relationship, which lead to J genuinely trying to help out a friend that she just happened to have met at work.

OP - if you're so concerned about your grandmother, have you suggested she comes and lives with you? Or, even, do you phone her every day and go to see her every weekend?
A natural and friendly relationship which developed just after a large amount of money was deposited? Coincidence?

I'm with carreauchompeur, there's attentive and personal banking service to those with large sums invested in the bank, but I bet none of them recommend going over and doing chores where money changes hands.

Even if there's no impropriety it's a highly inappropriate relationship for a bank worker to cultivate.

AllTorque

2,646 posts

268 months

Thursday 28th May 2015
quotequote all
Seen this before with a friend of the family (although not with the blatant bank connection). Before you know it, these people will be even bigger recipients in the will and your grandparents will be too befuddled to do much about it. Very hard to sort out.... someone said financial grooming, and I agree!