Just been assaulted with a meat cleaver!!

[MarshPhantom]

mgtony said:

remkingston said:

Get well soon OP.

Can't wait for the movie version.

St Elbows Fire.

Nightmare on Elbow St.

Good morning Vietn'arm.

Silence of the limbs.

Should be a hit in the theatre as well!

Kill Wullie.

[LordFlathead]

Fighting - it's not big and it's not cleaver!

Get well soon Hamish.

[Some Gump]

hamish88 said:

I thought it was just a flesh wound.
.

Thread just jumped the shark.

[tumble dryer]

hamish88 said:

Obviously you have never been to wishaw

And you're obviously not a local.

Wishay. FFS!

[dudleybloke]

Hows the food?

[spikeyhead]

dudleybloke said:

Hows the food?

Fried I presume

[tumble dryer]

hamish88 said:

Well I stay in Carfin so am fae the posh part

Posh part?

Aye, Right.


Good luck Amigo. Speak to the polis. At the very least, it'll help protect your ass.

[ikarl]

tumble dryer said:

hamish88 said:

Obviously you have never been to wishaw

And you're obviously not a local.

Wishay. FFS!

Oh FFS indeed!

Wishae.

[Some Gump]

tumble dryer said:

Good luck Amigo. Speak to the polis. At the very least, it'll help protect your ass.

It's not his arse that encountered a chopper, it was his elbow. No suprise to see a pher not know the difference between the two...

[CocoPops]

Some Gump said:

It's not his arse that encountered a chopper, it was his elbow. No suprise to see a pher not know the difference between the two...

GLOL

[SrMoreno]

MarshPhantom said:

mgtony said:

remkingston said:

Get well soon OP.

Can't wait for the movie version.

St Elbows Fire.

Nightmare on Elbow St.

Good morning Vietn'arm.

Silence of the limbs.

Should be a hit in the theatre as well!

Kill Wullie.

Cleaving Glasvegas

[Vaud]

All from IMDb:


A Farewell to Arms
Armageddon
Up in Arms
Cleaver Family Reunion

[Speed Badger]

Guy Garvey wishes you a speedy recovery Hamish.

[br d]

hamish88 said:

Obviously you have never been to wishaw

"When I started walking to Wishaw
My eyes obscured my vision"

Sorry, it's all I could think of.

[kowalski655]

If you want to claim compensation for criminal injuries then I am sure the cops have to be involved. And one of the questions on the claim form is "why was there a delay in informing plod "
I'm not sure"I was looking for advice from random butters on a car forum" will go down too well.

[jdw100]

One man insults another's mother (I'm guessing he doesn't even know her) man takes umbrage at insult resulting in pushing and then assault with a meat cleaver.

Definitely one for the 'council thread'.

I mean, what sort of adults engage in this sort of behaviour? How very underclass.....

[Studio117]

Speed Badger said:

[KFC]

jdw100 said:

One man insults another's mother (I'm guessing he doesn't even know her) man takes umbrage at insult resulting in pushing and then assault with a meat cleaver.

Definitely one for the 'council thread'.

I mean, what sort of adults engage in this sort of behaviour? How very underclass.....

Depending on how severe the injury is, the bloke might actually have done him a favour by chopping him up a bit Up till that point the OP could have been looking at a criminal conviction himself, and loss of job. I suspect now that the other guy has went overboard, thats going to be seen as punishment enough for the OP on both those points?

[jshell]

Breadvan72 said:

jshell said:

Breadvan72 said:

As noted above, starting a fight because someone called yer momma a skanky ho, or whatever the Glasgow equivalent thereof might be, isn't a very sensible plan.

It's customary, whilst in Glasgow, to present the first and middle fingers of one hand to the nose of the other person and state: "Smell yer Maw!" That tends to ensure a reasonable degree of violent mayhem ensues.

This is the very bestest fact that I have ever learned on PH! Worth the licence fee all in one go.

You're welcome. I shall be testing it out around Ashton Lane & the Merchant City tomorrow night and would like some potential witnesses and ambulance callers to volunteer their services... please?

[Jayyylo]

Breadvan72 said:

jshell said:

Breadvan72 said:

As noted above, starting a fight because someone called yer momma a skanky ho, or whatever the Glasgow equivalent thereof might be, isn't a very sensible plan.

It's customary, whilst in Glasgow, to present the first and middle fingers of one hand to the nose of the other person and state: "Smell yer Maw!" That tends to ensure a reasonable degree of violent mayhem ensues.

This is the very bestest fact that I have ever learned on PH! Worth the licence fee all in one go.

I'm now picturing BV (no idea what you look like) standing in court, using this to insult the opposing barrister.

Op - write down all the details you can remember as you'll possibly forget snippets or embellish when talking to the police, especially as you've now had time to think about it for a few days.