Marriage breakdown

[Amateurish]

The amount of bks some posters come out with on the subject of divorce never ceases to amaze me. There is so much misinformation around. To the OP - an amicable divorce is certainly very possible. As long as you and your spouse can both work together in the spirit of compromise, and you don't get hung up on the "reasons" for divorce, you should be fine. Good luck!

[LoonR1]

mikees said:

I'm still intrigued by this. I'd always worried there was some stupid 50/50 but say its 10 years, what logic sees a judge giving the person who arrived with nothing and contributed nothing any thing of whats been earned in increasing value (housing I guess).

If there were some logical steps to determine this it would make sense.

There is no magic formula, but nor is there some special law that screws the bloke over. Most men complaining about the divorce outcome are often fathers and fail to see that the kids are the driver behind the financial settlement.

No kids and financial splits are usually quite simple. However, if it's a long marriage and one spouse has given up work / sacrificed their career for the other then there's a good chance of an equitable split. Short marriage, no sacrifices on either side and it'll be a case of walking away with what you came in with bar an increase in equity in the house, or other gains during the marriage. The latter is far more related to the OP than any other scenario.

All those flapping op about the cost of a divorce need to consider that it's not an issue without kids. As soon as kids are involved then they take precedence and one parent will need to care for them and the other provide an appropriate lifestyle for the kids and the parent. If that leaves that parent on the breadline then tough; kids are a huge responsibility and you don't get to spoil their childhood by being selfish about your own wants.

[Devil2575]

Rangeroverover said:

Ignore advice about finding out who she may or may not be shagging........meaningless nobody cares.

While she is in amenable mode get to a lawyer NOW get an agreement sorted.....get her some independent advice or agreement won't stand up.

NOW NOW NOW get the agreement sorted before she gets influenced by the bitter and twisted man hater brigade

And before you get influeneced by the bitter and twister women hater brigade...

[Devil2575]

LoonR1 said:

...kids are a huge responsibility and you don't get to spoil their childhood by being selfish about your own wants.

There are a few on PH who need to understand this.

[robinessex]

Sell up quickly ( and secretly), and bugger of abroad. Somewhere warm would be good. Give her CD collection to a charity shop.