Jolly Japes that Police Officers Play (on each other)
Discussion
Thought I'd lighten the mood a little, and post up some of the stunts that I've heard of being pulled on colleagues. Some of these are not really true*, and are well known urban myths, but might raise a chuckle nonetheless...
1. The basic "Tie the Tag on the Toe of the Body" The victim is sent in to tie an ID tag onto a "body". The "body" is another shift member, and sits up from under the sheet halfway through having the tag tied to the toe. The really devious will stick their foot in cold water for a bit first.
2. Then there's the "Let's play a trick on the new member on the shift dead body in the morgue" (see above). However, the cocky shift member, who's never been caught out, gets set up in the morgue, preferably in the rollaway fridge, to play the trick. After a few minutes waiting, he or she starts shivering, only to have a hand reach over from the next tray, saying "Cold in here, isn't it?"
3. The "Stolen" car. Everyone on the shift gets on a separate channel to the normal one (and it helps to have a tame comms operator in on this one too). A "pursuit" develops, with the subject vehicle in the pursuit belonging to the victim - the newer and fancier the car, the better. The description of the pursuit given over the radio generally involves plenty of "damage" happening to the "subject vehicle", with it ending up "crashed"... preferably into a river or other body of water. Upside down is good too. Now if someone moves the "victim's" car before this happens, it will be even better when they go to the car park to check on the pride and joy.
4. The "Fill the Car/Pockets/Bag..." Fill the victim's car/pockets/bag with paper shreddings, or those little circles that are punched out after the holes been made to file something in a ring binder. A nice "snowstorm" effect can be obtained by tipping them down the air vents, then switching the fan to "full". When the ignition is turned on... This is NEVER acceptable with CS spray, however. Another variation is to staple sleeves together...
5. The "Duty Inspector Needs to get to a Scene... FAST" The victim is togged up in a riot helmet, overalls, wellies, ear defenders, and sent out to tape off a corner of the car park, so the helicopter can land. The victim is then given two maglites and told to wave them about so the helicopter pilot can see the landing zone.
6. The "New Year's Day Seawater Test" The victim is sent off to collect a sample of sea water for analysis. Any sort of tub will do, as long as there's a scenes of crime label on it. If the tub has to be dangled off something on a bit of string to get the sample, so much the better...
As I said, these are all just urban myths, and I'm sure the BiB on here would never participate in such juvenile, puerile antics. Of course, if any other BiB know of any, feel free to post away.
*And some of them really are actually true...
1. The basic "Tie the Tag on the Toe of the Body" The victim is sent in to tie an ID tag onto a "body". The "body" is another shift member, and sits up from under the sheet halfway through having the tag tied to the toe. The really devious will stick their foot in cold water for a bit first.
2. Then there's the "Let's play a trick on the new member on the shift dead body in the morgue" (see above). However, the cocky shift member, who's never been caught out, gets set up in the morgue, preferably in the rollaway fridge, to play the trick. After a few minutes waiting, he or she starts shivering, only to have a hand reach over from the next tray, saying "Cold in here, isn't it?"
3. The "Stolen" car. Everyone on the shift gets on a separate channel to the normal one (and it helps to have a tame comms operator in on this one too). A "pursuit" develops, with the subject vehicle in the pursuit belonging to the victim - the newer and fancier the car, the better. The description of the pursuit given over the radio generally involves plenty of "damage" happening to the "subject vehicle", with it ending up "crashed"... preferably into a river or other body of water. Upside down is good too. Now if someone moves the "victim's" car before this happens, it will be even better when they go to the car park to check on the pride and joy.
4. The "Fill the Car/Pockets/Bag..." Fill the victim's car/pockets/bag with paper shreddings, or those little circles that are punched out after the holes been made to file something in a ring binder. A nice "snowstorm" effect can be obtained by tipping them down the air vents, then switching the fan to "full". When the ignition is turned on... This is NEVER acceptable with CS spray, however. Another variation is to staple sleeves together...
5. The "Duty Inspector Needs to get to a Scene... FAST" The victim is togged up in a riot helmet, overalls, wellies, ear defenders, and sent out to tape off a corner of the car park, so the helicopter can land. The victim is then given two maglites and told to wave them about so the helicopter pilot can see the landing zone.
6. The "New Year's Day Seawater Test" The victim is sent off to collect a sample of sea water for analysis. Any sort of tub will do, as long as there's a scenes of crime label on it. If the tub has to be dangled off something on a bit of string to get the sample, so much the better...
As I said, these are all just urban myths, and I'm sure the BiB on here would never participate in such juvenile, puerile antics. Of course, if any other BiB know of any, feel free to post away.
*And some of them really are actually true...
A variation on the torch one was to send the frsh probationer to the top of tall building in the west end. Get them on the roof with the torches and tell them to wave them at passing 747's to help guide them in to Heathrow as the runway lights had failed.
Getting the new kid to walk very slowly up the high street with a shoe box that he believes contains a bomb. He has to walk it to the station carefully and place it in the bomb bin.
The next one was an actual 'death'o'gram' call where we had to inform the next of kin that Mr Stiff had died (That was the actual name, no word of a lie). Except, the bloke I was working with was very stupid and read the whole thing from the printed message sheet. It went something like, " I am here to inform you that Dr Cheng pronounced life extinct at 14:42hrs, the coroner has been informed of Mr Stiff's death."
Oh brother....
Getting the new kid to walk very slowly up the high street with a shoe box that he believes contains a bomb. He has to walk it to the station carefully and place it in the bomb bin.
The next one was an actual 'death'o'gram' call where we had to inform the next of kin that Mr Stiff had died (That was the actual name, no word of a lie). Except, the bloke I was working with was very stupid and read the whole thing from the printed message sheet. It went something like, " I am here to inform you that Dr Cheng pronounced life extinct at 14:42hrs, the coroner has been informed of Mr Stiff's death."
Oh brother....
We have a fella at work who is ex MOD, ex PLOD and an absolute pain in the backside for things like that.
From the very real and very heavy cannonball and chain for stag nights, sewing people's trouser legs up etc and general tales of high jinks and derring do on the job.
A psychologist would have a field day with him, bloody funny though!
From the very real and very heavy cannonball and chain for stag nights, sewing people's trouser legs up etc and general tales of high jinks and derring do on the job.
A psychologist would have a field day with him, bloody funny though!
Dibs re your No 4.
Someone I worked with came back from honeymoon to find that their entire house had been filled with this stuff to a depth of 4". Seemed that a jape had been worked out at the reception with an accomplice who worked at a computer paper producer. In the days when the continuous stationary was more popular than it is today, apparently they had skip fulls of the edge-hole punchings.
I think the victims were still finding bits of paper when their first born started school.
Of course there is the old request to go to stores for a 2BA tapped hole.
Someone I worked with came back from honeymoon to find that their entire house had been filled with this stuff to a depth of 4". Seemed that a jape had been worked out at the reception with an accomplice who worked at a computer paper producer. In the days when the continuous stationary was more popular than it is today, apparently they had skip fulls of the edge-hole punchings.
I think the victims were still finding bits of paper when their first born started school.
Of course there is the old request to go to stores for a 2BA tapped hole.
When I worked at a Jobcentre years ago, we used to wind up a straight laced lady by getting her to call for interview a Mr R Suppards. Never failed. We also got her on a phone call "from the council" threatening to nick her because she was parked across the county boundary....
And one of our real clients was a Mr Foreskin (really!)
Ken
And one of our real clients was a Mr Foreskin (really!)
Ken
As a student in London in the 70s, I was told of a couple of pranks pulled by (as usual) medical students. One was dismantling a scrap car then reassembling on the roof of a building, the other was the doctoring (no pun intended!) of a fellow student's room who had gone away for the weekend - the pranksters removed all furniture from the room, filled it with turf and added a couple of benches from the local park!
One jolly jape that I was involved in personally in the early 80s was one that still results in an earful from the victim, who was a college mate. After he and his missus got married and left for the honeymoon, we got into their new house (no damage done, just very sneaky!), aided by a local BiB friend of the victim who first called the local police to ensure we didn't get nabbed for B&E, then scattered paper tape punch remnants (like hole punch paper remnants, only much smaller) throughout their drawers/cupboards/clothes, etc. They were still finding the remnants for years afterwards, so I did feel guilty about that one!
Still, all good fun.......!!!!
Julian
One jolly jape that I was involved in personally in the early 80s was one that still results in an earful from the victim, who was a college mate. After he and his missus got married and left for the honeymoon, we got into their new house (no damage done, just very sneaky!), aided by a local BiB friend of the victim who first called the local police to ensure we didn't get nabbed for B&E, then scattered paper tape punch remnants (like hole punch paper remnants, only much smaller) throughout their drawers/cupboards/clothes, etc. They were still finding the remnants for years afterwards, so I did feel guilty about that one!
Still, all good fun.......!!!!
Julian
oh yes, done similar things where I work.
to the trainee ' phil, do me a favour and ask john if you can have a long stand',
He was stood for the thick end of 20 minutes.
Another chap who used to be in the navy would walk round the ship with a bucket. 5 hours before he was asked what he was doing.
to the trainee ' phil, do me a favour and ask john if you can have a long stand',
He was stood for the thick end of 20 minutes.
Another chap who used to be in the navy would walk round the ship with a bucket. 5 hours before he was asked what he was doing.
Dibble said:
3. The "Stolen" car. A "pursuit" develops, with the subject vehicle in the pursuit belonging to the victim
Did this one on xmas day 1995 at Harrogate
It was the radio controllers car!
Reved the van, two tones etc - he fell for it hook line--
Add to that
The probationer on sunday morning vehicle checks having to time the blue ligts wih a stop watch!
The swap driver whilst the vehicle is moving?
Passnegr and river get out run round and back in - 1st gear at iddle
Ive never done these of course!
I have heard of a legend involving a group of policemen in a transit. They were patrolling some demonstration or something and someone had figured out they could rotate the rear washer jet to squirt passers by. A bit later on they figured out, as the reservoir was in the back, that they could trigger it themselves using a key on the contacts. After a while, after driving around this thing on ahot summer's day and entertaining themselves squirting random passers by that wasn't water in the reservoir...
Another particularly evil tale I heard about was another couple who went on honeymoon.
"Friends" got into the house, sprinkled cress seed over the living room carpet, watered it liberally, turned on the central heating and then left again.
A nice, lush, green carpet awaited the happy couple on their return....
"Friends" got into the house, sprinkled cress seed over the living room carpet, watered it liberally, turned on the central heating and then left again.
A nice, lush, green carpet awaited the happy couple on their return....
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