Abolition of bridge tolls today - in SCOTLAND!
Discussion
360 detailing said:
As for keeping the sheep quiet in the inferiority complex movies, what about giving them something hard to suck on?? travel sweets as a suggestion.....
Shhh, thats what the unweened calf is for..... keep it quiet or they will all want a goEdited by Semi hemi on Wednesday 13th February 11:10
Semi hemi said:
The average Englishman (And you Shaquille,can consider your self promoted), in the home he calls his castle, slips into his national costume - a shabby raincoat patented by chemist Charles Macintosh of Glasgow, Scotland. He drives a car fitted with tyres, invented by John Boyd Dunlop of Dreghorn. Scotland. At the office, he receives his mail, bearing adhesive stamps invented by John Chalmers of Dundee, Scotland. During the day, he uses the telephone, invented by Alexander Graham Bell of Edinburgh, Scotland. At home in the evening, his daughter pedals her bicycle, invented by Kirkpatrik Macmillan, blacksmith of Dumfries, Scotland. He watches the news of T.V., an invention of John Logie Baird of Helensburgh, Scotland, and hears an item about the US Navy, which was founded by John Paul Jones of Kirkbean, Scotland. He has now been reminded too much of Scotland and in desperation he picks up the Bible, only to find that the first man mentioned in the good book is a Scot - King James VI - who authorised its translation. Nowhere can an Englishman turn to escape the ingenuity of the Scots. He could take to drink, but the Scots make the best in the world. He could take a rifle and end it all but the breech-loading rifle was invented by Captain Patrick Ferguson of Pitfours, Scotland. If he escaped death, he could find himself on an operating table injected with penicillin, discovered by Alexander Fleming of Darvel, Scotland, and given an aneasthetic, discovered by Sir James Young Simpson of Bathgate, Scotland. Out of the aneasthetic he would find no comfort in learning that he was "as safe as the Bank of England" which was founded by William Paterson of Dumfries, Scotland.
Hope that helps, now get back to your morris dancing ya numptie
The average Scotsman puts on his kilt possibly made from polyester (John Winfield) and manufactured on machines descended from Edmund Cartwright's power loom using John Kay's flying shuttle, and if natural fibres are used, the thread spun by Crompton's spinning jenny. He gets into his car, powered by the internal combustion engine invented by Samuel Brown, a former cooper from London, and constructed using modern steels based on Abraham Darby's steel production and refined by Henry Bessemer and drives to the optician. He has his colour vision tested (John Dalton was first to describe colour blindness) and is listed to have his cataracts removed surgically (Harold Ridley). The room is lit by electric light bulbs (Sir Joseph Swan). He decides he needs a holiday, and flies abroad on an aeroplane powered by jet engines (Sir Frank Whittle). Because he smokes and gets pissed a lot, he realises when he picks up a bit of totty in a bar in Magaluf (invented in Essex) that he can't get it up, and swallows a Viagra pill (Dunn, Wood and Terrett) but remembers to use a condom made using vulcanised latex invented by Thomas Hancock and patented in the UK before Goodyear got here. He then rubs some antiseptic (Joseph Lister) onto the sores on his cock before having a nice cup of tea and going to bed.Hope that helps, now get back to your morris dancing ya numptie
10 Pence Short said:
Very probably. It's not the Scot's fault that Labour are inherently stupid.
Its something I dont understand about the Scotland bashing here. Everyone goes on about CC charging, how shit labour & the tories & the libs are, and how noone listens to the populace. Then in Scotland, Labour get the snot kicked out of them, and the Parliament does a couple of things in the interest of its constituency, and everyone kicks off?I was expecting posts of "hell, yeah- time for some of that in England, down with Ken!", or whatever. Did Britain have the same tear-em-down mentality when we were kicking ass in the industrial revolution?
Semi hemi said:
Nubbin said:
before having a nice cup of tea and going to bed.
Tea? Go wash your mouth out... glad you picked up on that one! Truth is, all inventions are a series of ideas, pinched research, and fortuitous events that combine to produce the finished article. Penicillin, as an example, was first noted by a French medical student in 1896, Fleming realised there was potential, and named it, and two Oxford researchers isolated it and made it commercially possible. Brown's internal combustion engine was based on Watt's condensing engine idea, but he substituted flames for steam. Between our two great nations, we have supplied the world with everything it needs, and our cumulative inventiveness should be lauded mightily, rather than bickered about.Anyway, what have the Welsh invented?
Nubbin said:
Semi hemi said:
Nubbin said:
before having a nice cup of tea and going to bed.
Tea? Go wash your mouth out... glad you picked up on that one! Truth is, all inventions are a series of ideas, pinched research, and fortuitous events that combine to produce the finished article. Penicillin, as an example, was first noted by a French medical student in 1896, Fleming realised there was potential, and named it, and two Oxford researchers isolated it and made it commercially possible. Brown's internal combustion engine was based on Watt's condensing engine idea, but he substituted flames for steam. Between our two great nations, we have supplied the world with everything it needs, and our cumulative inventiveness should be lauded mightily, rather than bickered about.Anyway, what have the Welsh invented?
Having removed one source of revenue - they now want to look at an alternative source - Average Speed Cameras instead.....
All in the name of congestion of course.
All in the name of congestion of course.
Leithen said:
Having removed one source of revenue - they now want to look at an alternative source - Average Speed Cameras instead.....
All in the name of congestion of course.
Have to disagree slightly (sorryAll in the name of congestion of course.
)...if the cameras are only deployed during roadworks ie to protect the workforce,I have no problem with them.They are very effective on the Edinburgh bypass at the moment....I have seen few,if any,breaking the temporary 40mph limit.....If they are used as a tax then I totally agree with you.
Nubbin said:
Anyway, what have the Welsh invented?
Ahemm. How about Oliver Evans who invented the first ever automobile?How about Bill Frost a Welsh carpenter who patented the aeroplane in 1894 and took to the skies in a
powered flying machine the following year (8 years before the Wright brothers).
dickymint said:
Nubbin said:
Anyway, what have the Welsh invented?
Ahemm. How about Oliver Evans who invented the first ever automobile?How about Bill Frost a Welsh carpenter who patented the aeroplane in 1894 and took to the skies in a
powered flying machine the following year (8 years before the Wright brothers).
As you are all trying to escape
thinfourth2 said:
dickymint said:
Nubbin said:
Anyway, what have the Welsh invented?
Ahemm. How about Oliver Evans who invented the first ever automobile?How about Bill Frost a Welsh carpenter who patented the aeroplane in 1894 and took to the skies in a
powered flying machine the following year (8 years before the Wright brothers).
As you are all trying to escape
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