Discussion
ewenm said:
s3fella said:
PH and the car forums are bad enough, I spend far too much time on here! But I draw the line at the "online social networks" FFS surely social implies some element of actually meeting people! ! !
I find this stance interesting - what's the difference between PH and Facebook really? Both are websites that encourage people to interact, share interests, share stories, photos and experiences. It's curious that people post on a web-forum about how a different web-forum is not something they'd use...As for the social side, "real-life" meets are arranged on both PH and Facebook. I really can't see any material difference between the two sites other than that Facebook is far more popular than PH...
Over the years, people have changed their modes of communications; letter - telephone - email - web... Of course there will be some people who are socially disfunctional, there always have been and always will be, irrelevant of what the current popular mode of interaction is. Some people considering suicide would be considered socially disfunctional, some wouldn't. Sorting out the mental problems is the difficult thing, sadly.
Edited by ewenm on Monday 15th December 21:14
stigmundfreud said:
ewenm said:
s3fella said:
PH and the car forums are bad enough, I spend far too much time on here! But I draw the line at the "online social networks" FFS surely social implies some element of actually meeting people! ! !
I find this stance interesting - what's the difference between PH and Facebook really? Both are websites that encourage people to interact, share interests, share stories, photos and experiences. It's curious that people post on a web-forum about how a different web-forum is not something they'd use...As for the social side, "real-life" meets are arranged on both PH and Facebook. I really can't see any material difference between the two sites other than that Facebook is far more popular than PH...
Over the years, people have changed their modes of communications; letter - telephone - email - web... Of course there will be some people who are socially disfunctional, there always have been and always will be, irrelevant of what the current popular mode of interaction is. Some people considering suicide would be considered socially disfunctional, some wouldn't. Sorting out the mental problems is the difficult thing, sadly.
Edited by ewenm on Monday 15th December 21:14
Of course, it depends how you use each site - I converse with more strangers on PH than on Facebook; which do you think Daily Mailers would find more "strange" or "dangerous" on the basis of that information? In fact, the only people I have as friends on Facebook are people I've actually met and would go for a drink with. On Facebook you can choose whether to converse with strangers or not, post a thread here and you have no choice over who to converse with, unless you decide not to converse at all...
For what it's worth, I lost a mate a few weeks back to suicide.
I'd only known him for eighteen months or so but he was a bright, cheerful chap. Self-employed courier like myself but four times a year, he'd come and work for the same contractor as me. He used to take the piss out of me because he'd deliver ten times the stuff I did in the same time. That was his way, he'd burn himself out for a month, earn £5k, take another week off and go back to his normal job.
Turns out he took himself off to Exmoor in his van, connected a hosepipe to the exhaust and gassed himself. 44 years old, two kids and a wife. All completely devastated obviously.
I've seen folk on here write about how their friends who had committed suicide were the bubbly, friendly ones and though "Yes but I'd think I'd notice someone that depressed" but you really don't see it coming sometimes.
RIP Mark.
I'd only known him for eighteen months or so but he was a bright, cheerful chap. Self-employed courier like myself but four times a year, he'd come and work for the same contractor as me. He used to take the piss out of me because he'd deliver ten times the stuff I did in the same time. That was his way, he'd burn himself out for a month, earn £5k, take another week off and go back to his normal job.
Turns out he took himself off to Exmoor in his van, connected a hosepipe to the exhaust and gassed himself. 44 years old, two kids and a wife. All completely devastated obviously.
I've seen folk on here write about how their friends who had committed suicide were the bubbly, friendly ones and though "Yes but I'd think I'd notice someone that depressed" but you really don't see it coming sometimes.
RIP Mark.
Smart Mart said:
For what it's worth, I lost a mate a few weeks back to suicide.
I'd only known him for eighteen months or so but he was a bright, cheerful chap. Self-employed courier like myself but four times a year, he'd come and work for the same contractor as me. He used to take the piss out of me because he'd deliver ten times the stuff I did in the same time. That was his way, he'd burn himself out for a month, earn £5k, take another week off and go back to his normal job.
Turns out he took himself off to Exmoor in his van, connected a hosepipe to the exhaust and gassed himself. 44 years old, two kids and a wife. All completely devastated obviously.
I've seen folk on here write about how their friends who had committed suicide were the bubbly, friendly ones and though "Yes but I'd think I'd notice someone that depressed" but you really don't see it coming sometimes.
RIP Mark.
very very sad.I'd only known him for eighteen months or so but he was a bright, cheerful chap. Self-employed courier like myself but four times a year, he'd come and work for the same contractor as me. He used to take the piss out of me because he'd deliver ten times the stuff I did in the same time. That was his way, he'd burn himself out for a month, earn £5k, take another week off and go back to his normal job.
Turns out he took himself off to Exmoor in his van, connected a hosepipe to the exhaust and gassed himself. 44 years old, two kids and a wife. All completely devastated obviously.
I've seen folk on here write about how their friends who had committed suicide were the bubbly, friendly ones and though "Yes but I'd think I'd notice someone that depressed" but you really don't see it coming sometimes.
RIP Mark.
but sometimes you paint on a plastic smile and just get on with it.
such a waste of life. and painful for those left behind,
Smart Mart said:
I've seen folk on here write about how their friends who had committed suicide were the bubbly, friendly ones and though "Yes but I'd think I'd notice someone that depressed" but you really don't see it coming sometimes.
In my case the bloke in question was someone I'd only known a few months and was the grumpiest bloke in the village. For obvious reasons we hit it off from the start. He had the most cynical outlook on life, but that was no reason to leave 4 kids (one baby) and a cheerful wife. Mr POD said:
Smart Mart said:
I've seen folk on here write about how their friends who had committed suicide were the bubbly, friendly ones and though "Yes but I'd think I'd notice someone that depressed" but you really don't see it coming sometimes.
In my case the bloke in question was someone I'd only known a few months and was the grumpiest bloke in the village. For obvious reasons we hit it off from the start. He had the most cynical outlook on life, but that was no reason to leave 4 kids (one baby) and a cheerful wife. Mark ( my friend ) had a previous history for depression that I didn't know about till after he died. All I can say is that he hid it well as I'd have him a long way down on the list of friends likely to top themselves.
ypauly said:
A short while back doc advised this site as I was showing symptoms of stress and suffering a stress related illness. But it goes much much further than that. wether it's stress, anxiety, depression or some other mind problem this is very easy to use and as you can do it at home nobody else needs to know.
It is excellent, It is also free just a simple registration
http://moodgym.anu.edu.au/welcome/new/terms
ETA To start after a simple test it tells you how twisted your mind is I wonder who would get the highest score on PH????
I'm in that, suprise suprise. The Doc recommended the site to me. I can't seem to find out what my original score was though as they have gone to a new version!! It is excellent, It is also free just a simple registration
http://moodgym.anu.edu.au/welcome/new/terms
ETA To start after a simple test it tells you how twisted your mind is I wonder who would get the highest score on PH????
tonyvid said:
ypauly said:
A short while back doc advised this site as I was showing symptoms of stress and suffering a stress related illness. But it goes much much further than that. wether it's stress, anxiety, depression or some other mind problem this is very easy to use and as you can do it at home nobody else needs to know.
It is excellent, It is also free just a simple registration
http://moodgym.anu.edu.au/welcome/new/terms
ETA To start after a simple test it tells you how twisted your mind is I wonder who would get the highest score on PH????
I'm in that, suprise suprise. The Doc recommended the site to me. I can't seem to find out what my original score was though as they have gone to a new version!! It is excellent, It is also free just a simple registration
http://moodgym.anu.edu.au/welcome/new/terms
ETA To start after a simple test it tells you how twisted your mind is I wonder who would get the highest score on PH????
ewenm said:
s3fella said:
PH and the car forums are bad enough, I spend far too much time on here! But I draw the line at the "online social networks" FFS surely social implies some element of actually meeting people! ! !
I find this stance interesting - what's the difference between PH and Facebook really? Both are websites that encourage people to interact, share interests, share stories, photos and experiences. It's curious that people post on a web-forum about how a different web-forum is not something they'd use...As for the social side, "real-life" meets are arranged on both PH and Facebook. I really can't see any material difference between the two sites other than that Facebook is far more popular than PH...
Over the years, people have changed their modes of communications; letter - telephone - email - web... Of course there will be some people who are socially disfunctional, there always have been and always will be, irrelevant of what the current popular mode of interaction is. Some people considering suicide would be considered socially disfunctional, some wouldn't. Sorting out the mental problems is the difficult thing, sadly.
Edited by ewenm on Monday 15th December 21:14
I think if i was 18 now, not double that, I'd be a very different person than I am, socially, and perhaps my outlook on life would be different. Certainly, I think children and young adults grow up with different ideals and interests, interact differently and rely on computers and networking / forums more than I did growing up.
So what I mean is, hopefully, those of us that remember life before the internet, even if we bounght into it when it first really took off in UK like I did (1994/5 got my first ISP), we'd already developed out one to one social skills by then.
Communication is certainly being dumbed down nowadays and the media we use to communicate I think champions this. My spelling and grammer on PH for example is very poor, whereas when I send out a letter for work, it is perfect! I can see many issues arising from people growing up thinking it is ok to communicate in this "relaxed manner", but the loss of social skills and developing a resilience to emotionally trying events is one of them.
I foresee higher levels of depression being identified in future. Although my facebook and bebo experience is limited to seeing friends kids on it etc, I have yet to see anyone on it really really having fun and giggling/laughing, whereas I remeber kids laughing and having fun all the time face to face when I was younger. I think that ironically, social networking actually physically isolates people more that it unites them. It's interesting to read people typing that they are worried about a friend in trouble and all the checking online and stuff they do to try to find them, but they dont actually go out and look for them.....20 years ago, if you became concerned for someone's safety and you could not get them ont he phone, you went out and looked for them yourself, or made sure someone did...
Monitoring someone or having a relationship or friendship with someone online is absolutely nothing like keeping your eye on someone or having a relationship with them in real life.
We are breeding an introverted and isolated society with poor people skills and an inability to deal with life's challenges due to the cosseted virtual world that some members of society operate in nowadays..... IMO
ypauly said:
Agent Starling, do you think you can dissect me with this blunt little tool?jollygreen said:
ypauly said:
Agent Starling, do you think you can dissect me with this blunt little tool?
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