The worlds worst ads
Discussion
Sorry.
The ones for the Vauxhall Zafira and Meriva with those godawful children acting like adults.
The message seems to be that owning one of these cars will tun you from someone who should be leading a fun and carefree life into a charmless c
t.
They might as well end the advert with the slogan 'Old before your time? Try the new Meriva & Zafira from Vauxhall'.
The message seems to be that owning one of these cars will tun you from someone who should be leading a fun and carefree life into a charmless c
t.They might as well end the advert with the slogan 'Old before your time? Try the new Meriva & Zafira from Vauxhall'.
Edited by Risotto on Thursday 28th August 20:00
That nauseating ad for some finance company. Can't remember what they're called. The one where some dozy bint is on the blower to some "really easy to deal with" tosser arranging a 25 grand loan, whilst one of her 2.4 kids is snotting around in the garage looking for his bike and hubby is getting ready for footy (or something).
That one or any ad that promises to consolidate your debts into "one easy monthly payment". Oh, that and ambulance chaser ads.
Parasites, the lot of them. Can't believe anyone actually falls for their bullst!
That Moonpig one is ste too . . . have they actually ever sold anything??!!!!
That one or any ad that promises to consolidate your debts into "one easy monthly payment". Oh, that and ambulance chaser ads.
Parasites, the lot of them. Can't believe anyone actually falls for their bulls
t!That Moonpig one is s
te too . . . have they actually ever sold anything??!!!!brum said:
You don't pay your TV license for any adverts. You pay it so you don't get adverts on the BBC channels.
Yeah, well the ones I hate are the ones telling you to pay your licence, or else......and the car tax ones. "We are watching you, citizen! Comply or be punished!"
s. 
Generally, I watch everything after the fact on sky+, which means no adverts
It’s not just me is it? They are getting worse aren't they? I mean what’s happened to ones like the Fiat Strada and glorious Jennifer Aniston Lynx ads?
Any iota of wit or style has now been lost. Now whenever the ads come on you dive for either the mute button or the off switch. I mean, look at these nightmares that are currently polluting our airwaves;
Beauty Products, Bathroom and medical;
Davina and her hair:
They can’t be bothered to re film the commercial so all they do each time is computer generate the new hair colour. I mean that really shows you how much faith they have in the product that they can’t show you it in really life. And what kind of mother rings her daughter on a dirty weekend away? “Hello mum, yes I have just changed my hair colour and now my fellas doing me up the chocolate speedway to celebrate,”
Moss and her mascara:
"Get the London Look," What's that then? Crack w
e?Nadine Baggot & her pentapeptides:
Its face cream for Gods sake, you put it on your time ravaged face in the frantic hope that Phil from accounts might flirt a bit more with you at the Christmas party and he might want to pull you into the back of his 3 series for a quickie. And who knows, he might have some more face cream in there for you… No fancy science talk is going to make that any better.
Jack from Lost and his moisturiser:
We get it, okay. Its face cream (see above.) but it’s for men and it doesn’t make you gay. Look there you are driving a muscle car, there you are boxing, there you are with a foxy chick. Got it, not gay, not in slightest, definitely not.
Lois the dental expert:
Lois love, we know you’re not really a dental expert, that this advert is so cheap that they’ve just dragged the only slightly good looking one out of the typing pool who can string more than two sentences together without mentioning Big Brother, okay. You’re not fooling anyone.
“It’s all gone!”:
That’s right, let’s advertise a product designed specifically to cover up the smell of pooh. Then let’s dub it so badly that it makes no sense. Two things, who keeps a pad and pencil in the loo? And in order for him to have pushed the note through the bottom of the door a five year old must have waddled from the bog to the door. What do you think the chances are that he’s left a nice little dribble trail to and from the throne?
The constipation one:
Where you see the girl shove a load of junk into her handbag to show how ‘bunged’ up she is. Then later you see her skipping lightly through the town centre, the implication being that she’s just had a massive dump. Just what I want to see while I’m having my tea. Speaking of which…
The thrush one:
Really, truly, I don’t want to know. I particularly don’t want to know you have to have a cream.
Banks & Loans;
The singing cashiers:
I’ve got an idea; let’s get the two ugliest people in our company to advertise it. Apparently, there is talk of record deal and a possible Xmas single. Give me strength.
“Josh, Dads found your scooter”:
Come on, this is a spoof right? This can’t be real? I mean no one talks to a bank like that, especially not one that’s about to put you in debt for the rest of your natural life. And I mean look at the house she’s in, do you really think their potential customers live in a massive place like that. No, I’m guessing most of their customers live in a little palace decorated with booze stains up the wall, a massive TV in the corner, pizza boxes in the kitchen and a pram on the front lawn. “At least I can get me credit sorted,” Yeah right, you stupid northern cow.
The two pratts trekking round the world on their credit card:
The most patronising commercial in the entire history of the world. These two wander round the world running up a massive tab on their card without a care, whilst looking down on the various ‘natives’ that they deign to give money to on this once in a lifetime trip. Then they will proceed to bore the pants off anyone who visits them for dinner in their now ethnically decorated flat, while he wears his tatty suit and she shows off her Thai tattoo. I mean what do they do for living to afford this binge and how have they got the time off work? Oh I know, they work in advertising. But now they've been taken off the as we best not mention unlimited credit anymore eh?
Vorderman:
Money grabbing cash w
e who doesn’t mind encouraging people to mortgage themselves up to the hilt as long as she gets paid and gets her ugly mug on the TV. But now she's been fired maybe she'll need her own product.“I’m debt,”:
Yes you are. Suck it up and act like a man.
The one with the cartoon birds:
Like that’s going to make you feel better about not being able to feed the kids or pay the mortgage. Ahh, look sweet little cartoon birdies.
Car Insurance & Holidays;
Winner:
Enough said. The most embarrassing thing about this advert is not the fact that he’s quite obviously close to death but the fact that I sold a Golf to one of the ‘real people’.
Hunting through the jungle for a man in suit:
If you don’t want to make a crap advert it might be an idea to give your company a decent name.
“Multi Car! Multi Car!”
Dead bloody parrot, dead bloody parrot! Hey did you know? An insurance company will do a deal if you insure more than one car with them? Get away, really? No kidding.
Women only car insurance companies:
Just awful and not proven either, this makes it reverse sexist. But the best bit is watching the “pink aussies” one with the ‘real ladies’ as they jostle and push to try and get themselves the maximum amount of screen time.
The Matrix one:
Yeah this movie was about seven years ago, it’s not trendy anymore. And if you want to make your product appealing it might be an idea to ditch the pushy cow that needs to go on holiday “RIGHT NOW!”
Ambulance chasers;
Stuck up b
h in court: “Please remember where you are,” Oh for Christ’s sake, you’re not fooling anyone. You are in a studio trying desperately to flog a service which has raised insurance premiums for 90% of the public by much more than any natural disaster, to a bunch of pikeys who want an easy life. Some of the worst acting, anywhere ever.
Girl in gym:
As above but at least they only paid for one bad actress.
Car adverts;
Come on!
I thought this company had lost the knack for making bad adverts after advertising a high performance sports car with Griff Rhys Jones in his underpants but they’ve proved they can still do it. Voyeuristic, shouty, cuddly toys that are able to drive a car….right.
Food;
The beefy and lamb ads.
Cartoon men showing each other their arses…. That’s going to make me buy meat. For Gods sake, who signed this one off?
Shops;
Currys ideas pod
I’ve got an idea, instead of showing us this hi tech HQ with these happy little geeks & their stuck up b
h of a boss, spend the money on in store staff training so that the gumbies that you hire, know a little more about the products and less about the phrase,“Do you want an extended warranty with that?”
“Yeah, it’s a ten pound pocket radio,”
“Warranty’s £10.50,”
“Just take my money,”
Oh and maybe bulk purchase some deodorant for them all as well.
Moooooooooonnnnnnnnnpiiiiiiiigggggggggg!!!!!!:
nnnnnnnnaaaaaaaaaaffffffffffffffff offffffffffffffffffff!
Xmas Ads 2007
Morrisons:
You couldn’t get proper celebs cos Tesco have nicked them all, so you had to make do with the runners up. I mean Scarface from the football is still in the public eye but Lulu, Denise Van Outen and Nick Hancock? Most of these guys couldn’t even open an envelope these days.
Asda:
Ha,ha,ha,ha,ha,ha.. We’re all happy here. Look here we are having a Christmas and getting what’s left of Julie Walters to serve us. I half expected her to say “is it on the trolley?” And where will all this goodwill be when the staff’s appraisals come around in the New Year.
“Spent too much time mucking around with TV star, that’ll be a written warning then,”
Coca-Cola:
You don’t own Christmas you b
ds and you don’t own Father Christmas. Sorry, sorry Father Holidays as you no doubt be calling him soon so as not to offend.Tesco:
Good idea guys, throw your entire TV ad campaign for Chrimbo around a bunch of washed up wannabes who most right thinking people loathe and then make them pretend they all still love each other.
Sainsburys:
Fat Tongue, again. Making dishes that no one else has either the skill or the time to make over the holidays. Especially when little Johnny’s kicking the cat because you couldn’t afford an Xbox 360.
KFC:
Speaking of which, you’re all going to be poor soon so its time to start buying junk food for Christmas. The reason why you’re poor is because you’ve spent too much money giving tips to the dustman. I mean, who still does this? And who still has a milkman anyway?
Thorntons:
And this just gives me the creeps. I mean WTF? A devil child day dreaming in a shopping centre about ice skaters who then twitch like an epileptic in strobe factory. What is it about and why would it make you chocolates? And look at the kid. He’s SATAN!! or at the very least one of his little imps.
The Hypno-Toad said:
“Josh, Dads found your scooter”:
Come on, this is a spoof right? This can’t be real? I mean no one talks to a bank like that, especially not one that’s about to put you in debt for the rest of your natural life. And I mean look at the house she’s in, do you really think their potential customers live in a massive place like that. No, I’m guessing most of their customers live in a little palace decorated with booze stains up the wall, a massive TV in the corner, pizza boxes in the kitchen and a pram on the front lawn. “At least I can get me credit sorted,” Yeah right, you stupid northern cow.
That's the fecker! Can't stand it!! If anyone actually acts on watching that, they need their ears cleaned.Come on, this is a spoof right? This can’t be real? I mean no one talks to a bank like that, especially not one that’s about to put you in debt for the rest of your natural life. And I mean look at the house she’s in, do you really think their potential customers live in a massive place like that. No, I’m guessing most of their customers live in a little palace decorated with booze stains up the wall, a massive TV in the corner, pizza boxes in the kitchen and a pram on the front lawn. “At least I can get me credit sorted,” Yeah right, you stupid northern cow.
With a shotgun cartridge
One person chosen at random to quote
So this is a bad advert because??????
Surely a bad one is one you can't remember
brum said:
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOh BODYFORM. As a teenager i got this fking jingle stuck in my head and went around singing it - this makes you look like a tt
So you know exactly what the product is and what it is calledking jingle stuck in my head and went around singing it - this makes you look like a ttSo this is a bad advert because??????
Surely a bad one is one you can't remember
thinfourth2 said:
One person chosen at random to quote
So this is a bad advert because??????
Surely a bad one is one you can't remember
Well I had to google "Michael Winner calm down dear" to find out that he was advertising Esure. For some reason I thought he was advertising Privilege insurance, then remembered that Joanna Lumley did those ads.brum said:
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOh BODYFORM. As a teenager i got this fking jingle stuck in my head and went around singing it - this makes you look like a tt
So you know exactly what the product is and what it is calledking jingle stuck in my head and went around singing it - this makes you look like a ttSo this is a bad advert because??????
Surely a bad one is one you can't remember
The Hypno-Toad said:
Nadine Baggot & her pentapeptides:
Its face cream for Gods sake, you put it on your time ravaged face in the frantic hope that Phil from accounts might flirt a bit more with you at the Christmas party and he might want to pull you into the back of his 3 series for a quickie. And who knows, he might have some more face cream in there for you… No fancy science talk is going to make that any better.
That advert is comedy gold. She looks like she's made of plasticIts face cream for Gods sake, you put it on your time ravaged face in the frantic hope that Phil from accounts might flirt a bit more with you at the Christmas party and he might want to pull you into the back of his 3 series for a quickie. And who knows, he might have some more face cream in there for you… No fancy science talk is going to make that any better.
There is much much worse than all of the above.
Gillette Venus
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=laUMyy3XZaY
Particularly the bint 'painting'.
Gillette Venus
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=laUMyy3XZaY
Particularly the bint 'painting'.
Negative Creep said:
The Hypno-Toad said:
Nadine Baggot & her pentapeptides:
Its face cream for Gods sake, you put it on your time ravaged face in the frantic hope that Phil from accounts might flirt a bit more with you at the Christmas party and he might want to pull you into the back of his 3 series for a quickie. And who knows, he might have some more face cream in there for you… No fancy science talk is going to make that any better.
That advert is comedy gold. She looks like she's made of plasticIts face cream for Gods sake, you put it on your time ravaged face in the frantic hope that Phil from accounts might flirt a bit more with you at the Christmas party and he might want to pull you into the back of his 3 series for a quickie. And who knows, he might have some more face cream in there for you… No fancy science talk is going to make that any better.
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Before;
Some good answers here!
That toss annoying one with some old bird who's a film star telling us about 'deep set wrinkles'. This goes thus...
'Blah blah blah...I call them 'deep set wrinkles''
No, you daft cow, you don't tossing well call them that do you, you fk? some wanky marketing man who spends his time jizzing to fking whale music came up with that stty pile of gash! NOT YOU! Do you really expect me to believe that you phoned up your PA one day and said 'you know these wrinkles on muy face that are particularly hard to get rid of? I'm going to call them deep-fking-set wrinkles, phone up Olay (or whoever the fk it is), I've just come up with the name of their new face cream. The marketing department will be delighted, get the science boys to come up with something called 'smoothsyourfaceoutatreatium' and some flash computer-fking-graphics to explain in an easy to understand way what all this clever made up science with no actual basis on fact or scientific method is doing.
The bird is Andie MacDowell, and it's not Olay, it's L'Oriel, Google tells me.
AARRRGGGHHH
What the fk is Pro-Retinol A and Fibro-Plastyl?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?
That toss annoying one with some old bird who's a film star telling us about 'deep set wrinkles'. This goes thus...
'Blah blah blah...I call them 'deep set wrinkles''
No, you daft cow, you don't tossing well call them that do you, you f
k? some wanky marketing man who spends his time jizzing to fking whale music came up with that stty pile of gash! NOT YOU! Do you really expect me to believe that you phoned up your PA one day and said 'you know these wrinkles on muy face that are particularly hard to get rid of? I'm going to call them deep-fking-set wrinkles, phone up Olay (or whoever the fk it is), I've just come up with the name of their new face cream. The marketing department will be delighted, get the science boys to come up with something called 'smoothsyourfaceoutatreatium' and some flash computer-fking-graphics to explain in an easy to understand way what all this clever made up science with no actual basis on fact or scientific method is doing.The bird is Andie MacDowell, and it's not Olay, it's L'Oriel, Google tells me.
AARRRGGGHHH
What the f
k is Pro-Retinol A and Fibro-Plastyl?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?The "Injury Lawyers 4 You" adverts always piss me off - as do most of the "Blame and Claim" adverts.
Any of those beauty product adverts loaded with pseudoscientific bull###t - what the f##k is "Boswelox" anyway. I love they way they have had to start putting disclaimers on the bottom like "Kate is wearing false lash inserts". Obviously the products arent as good as they are trying to make out huh!
As for the orangina advert with the pole dancing animals .......... freaky!
Any of those beauty product adverts loaded with pseudoscientific bull###t - what the f##k is "Boswelox" anyway. I love they way they have had to start putting disclaimers on the bottom like "Kate is wearing false lash inserts". Obviously the products arent as good as they are trying to make out huh!
As for the orangina advert with the pole dancing animals .......... freaky!
Dunk76 said:
There is much much worse than all of the above.
Gillette Venus
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=laUMyy3XZaY
Particularly the bint 'painting'.
Yeh - they never show a 50 something giving the old growler a once over do they?Gillette Venus
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=laUMyy3XZaY
Particularly the bint 'painting'.
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