Stupid cycling injuries
Discussion
We've all seen people really hurt themselves on bikes, this thread isn't about that. It's more about the stupid, embarrassing injuries that people receive from being, well.... Daft.
For example, at a cafe last week I saw a bloke hit himself in the face with his own tyre lever...
Any others?
For example, at a cafe last week I saw a bloke hit himself in the face with his own tyre lever...
Any others?
Pretty sure this would count.
On the northern entrance to Hyde Park is a gate. There's a bike lane and a path.
Invariably pedestrians walk in the bike lane and I sometimes make a point of going quite close and saying 'bike lane' as I go past.
This time I misjudged it and caught my bar ends in the gate. It immediately yanked my bars 90 degrees sideways and threw me over the top.
Cue me actually hurting myself but having to MTFU as I rode off to barely stifled laughter.
These days I use a bell on approach.
On the northern entrance to Hyde Park is a gate. There's a bike lane and a path.
Invariably pedestrians walk in the bike lane and I sometimes make a point of going quite close and saying 'bike lane' as I go past.
This time I misjudged it and caught my bar ends in the gate. It immediately yanked my bars 90 degrees sideways and threw me over the top.
Cue me actually hurting myself but having to MTFU as I rode off to barely stifled laughter.
These days I use a bell on approach.
Theres a bit of kerb that sticks out just by Tesco's at Balham on the CS7 & there always seems to be a broken lamppost just by it & i used to think that one day i'm going to hit that.
A few months ago i got cut up by an Ocado van & as i turned round to give the driver some abuse ... BBOOOOM i hit it !
Most painful 4 mile journey home ever.
Of course Mrs BCM found it highly amusing tending to my cuts & grazes
A few months ago i got cut up by an Ocado van & as i turned round to give the driver some abuse ... BBOOOOM i hit it !
Most painful 4 mile journey home ever.
Of course Mrs BCM found it highly amusing tending to my cuts & grazes
My mates say this is the stupidest thing they have heard so here goes....
I was racing at the RAF champs one year, after the race I rode to the car to get changed and headed back to help with the course breakdown. On the way back I realised my forks were still very firm so I used my toe to move the lever on the bottom on the for leg to soften the forks. I slipped off the lever and put my toe in the wheel which immediately locked up, throwing me over the bars! I turned up at the course thinking I managed to get away with it as no one had seen it.....what I didn't realise was I was covered in claret and had to confess what I did. As you can imagine no sympathy anywhere.
I was racing at the RAF champs one year, after the race I rode to the car to get changed and headed back to help with the course breakdown. On the way back I realised my forks were still very firm so I used my toe to move the lever on the bottom on the for leg to soften the forks. I slipped off the lever and put my toe in the wheel which immediately locked up, throwing me over the bars! I turned up at the course thinking I managed to get away with it as no one had seen it.....what I didn't realise was I was covered in claret and had to confess what I did. As you can imagine no sympathy anywhere.
First time I rode a bike with disk brakes, grabbed a handful of front and went straight over the bars, at traffic lights. Got a round of applause from some passengers on a bus 
What I wouldn't suggest is googling for injuries caused by people sticking their fingers into spinning brake rotors
What I wouldn't suggest is googling for injuries caused by people sticking their fingers into spinning brake rotors
And I forgot this classic.
The old routemaster busses were a right PITA for commuting in London as people would run across the bike lane in front of you to get on, or hop off without looking while the bus stopped at lights.
As I saw one waiting at a set of traffic lights, I could see someone walking down the back staircase and figured they were going to jump off into the bike lane without looking. So I slowed down enough so they'd walk in front of me and I could give them a scare.
As predicted they jumped off the bus right in front of me and as I got ready to shout at them, I realised too late that they were pulling a wheely suitcase off the bus with them too.
Cue me ploughing into their suitcase and going arse over tit onto the gravel.
The key to both my stories, really, is that when I was acting like a t
t, I came off worse.
I learned my lesson and my cycling 'style' is far more relaxed these days.
The old routemaster busses were a right PITA for commuting in London as people would run across the bike lane in front of you to get on, or hop off without looking while the bus stopped at lights.
As I saw one waiting at a set of traffic lights, I could see someone walking down the back staircase and figured they were going to jump off into the bike lane without looking. So I slowed down enough so they'd walk in front of me and I could give them a scare.
As predicted they jumped off the bus right in front of me and as I got ready to shout at them, I realised too late that they were pulling a wheely suitcase off the bus with them too.
Cue me ploughing into their suitcase and going arse over tit onto the gravel.
The key to both my stories, really, is that when I was acting like a t
t, I came off worse. I learned my lesson and my cycling 'style' is far more relaxed these days.
Team Murray BMX (loved that bike) with pedal back rear brake, and a long gravel drive used to make for great skids, until the day something went wrong with the rear brake. I stamped on the pedal, it kept turning, so I launched myself over the bars and ended up with some nice gravel rash on my hands 
I was a bit luckier the day the handlebar clamp broke and the bars came off while I was pulling a wheelie...I landed in nice soft muckheap
I was a bit luckier the day the handlebar clamp broke and the bars came off while I was pulling a wheelie...I landed in nice soft muckheap
Best Darwin attempt from me was my first proper bike computer around 1990
You could previously get those needle and dial things with a cable from your front hub bit this was a new one with magnets and a digital readout - cutting edge
I fitted it as soon as I got it home and then steamed out into the countryside to see exactly how fast I could go
My vision was limited by being in as full aero tuck as I could and more importantly having my attention glued to the magic numbers on the screen instead of my surroundings
To date that day is still my only contact with a car
Motorist pulled out of her drive without looking and I hit her passenger door in excess of 30mph flying over the car and landing still strapped in to the pedals
Amazingly I was unhurt as was the bike
In my sense of relief I even told her just to go and leave me on the ground
If I hadnt been so stunned I suspect my mood would not have been as dismissive
Cheers
Cycling to work as usual, and the bolt holding my saddle to the seatpin sheared at the head, pitching me without warning straight onto the towpath where I proceeded to rip all the skin off all the places you'd expect (ouch etc) and, rather annoyingly break my right index finger as it got stuck in the grass verge.
The "stupid" bit came later on.......
After sliding down the road for a while, I did what we all do - I ran back and checked my bike was ok! Then realised I was in agony and also a little dizzy so went to sit down and calm down a bit, still listening to my podcasts People came bast (popular cycle commute) and I said I'm ok etc etc as they went past.
After 10 minutes, some people had stopped and were chatting to me when I decided I was ok to stand up and walk the last km to work. At which point I fainted and smashed my face into the road.
Would a helmet have helped? you ask...... nope because I'd have already have taken it off
Addenum: My wife, the GP, took 5 days to decide I should probably get my "sprained" finger x-rayed after all after telling me to man up!
The "stupid" bit came later on.......
After sliding down the road for a while, I did what we all do - I ran back and checked my bike was ok! Then realised I was in agony and also a little dizzy so went to sit down and calm down a bit, still listening to my podcasts
People came bast (popular cycle commute) and I said I'm ok etc etc as they went past.After 10 minutes, some people had stopped and were chatting to me when I decided I was ok to stand up and walk the last km to work. At which point I fainted and smashed my face into the road.
Would a helmet have helped? you ask...... nope because I'd have already have taken it off
Addenum: My wife, the GP, took 5 days to decide I should probably get my "sprained" finger x-rayed after all after telling me to man up!
Riding home from work one night I got cocky and pulled up at a crossing. Rather than unclip I decided to hold onto the traffic light. I was sat upright, not holding onto the handlebars. For some reason the front wheel turned 90deg to the right without me moving, and without me holding onto it. I grabbed hold of the traffic light tighter before I ended up on the deck.
Ended up with this bruise for weeks.
Ended up with this bruise for weeks.
Forgot one:
Cycling to school on my 10 speed "racer" and the rear derailleur was making an odd clanking noise, so I looked down to try and see if there was something wrong and the next thing I knew I was on the roof of a parked triumph dolomite. Bent the forks so far the wheel was touching the frame but didn't even buckle the wheel.
Cycling to school on my 10 speed "racer" and the rear derailleur was making an odd clanking noise, so I looked down to try and see if there was something wrong and the next thing I knew I was on the roof of a parked triumph dolomite.
Bent the forks so far the wheel was touching the frame but didn't even buckle the wheel. I was about 14 and tried to ride a younger kid's mini-bmx down the very steep banking at the side of a slide in a children's playground. Everyone saw me come off and slam onto the end of the jack-knifed handlebars leaving a perfectly round red welt matching the end of the grips on my upper tummy, later in the elaborate dismount I took a nut-crushing tumble on to the stem. I didn't maintain mtfu composure throughout.
Caning it in the local woods and I popped out of one single track run onto a tarmac 'estate' road, stood on the pedals and headed left off into the next single track section at speed.
Well. It certainly looked like the entrance to the next single track section. Unfortunately it was not, and the young trees either side of this narrower track were closer together than my handlebars would fit through. Upshot was me realising at the last moment (it was dark) and "only" smacking the left hand one of those trees astride the narrow track. I was spun around and deposited unceremoniously onto the floor, and my bars and stem were twisted off centre. I was more or less OK, with just a few scuffs and scrapes on exposed parts of my arms and legs.
After picking myself, and the bike up, I headed back to the tarmac and immediately saw the 'proper' entry to the segment approximately 30 metres further on. Doh!
Well. It certainly looked like the entrance to the next single track section. Unfortunately it was not, and the young trees either side of this narrower track were closer together than my handlebars would fit through. Upshot was me realising at the last moment (it was dark) and "only" smacking the left hand one of those trees astride the narrow track. I was spun around and deposited unceremoniously onto the floor, and my bars and stem were twisted off centre. I was more or less OK, with just a few scuffs and scrapes on exposed parts of my arms and legs.
After picking myself, and the bike up, I headed back to the tarmac and immediately saw the 'proper' entry to the segment approximately 30 metres further on. Doh!
Too many to think about, although thankfully most in my youth. Plenty of over-the-handlebar episodes but two of the best were on a tandem .... one time we ended up tangled up in an electric fence and the next in a ditch at the side of the road in a load of nettles. Both mildly painful but hilarious at the same time.
Years ago I was around 12-13. A mate had a fixed wheel bike which as of the time was built from bits. I was riding it down the hill nearby which was a cul de sac. As I got to the bottom of the slope going reasonably quick I pulled the front brake. In those days the brake blocks slid into the carrier. Some muppet had assembled the carriers the wrong way round & they shot out ahead of me. Cue furious back pedaling to slow down & I hit the brick wall at the end, hard. I go A over T over the dropped bars & land on the wall. Took a big chunk out of an index finger knuckle. Lots of claret & me feeling sorry for myself. My father thought it rib splittingly funny. 
All my mates knowing that I was half decent at DH and jumps, find me a bike and get me to a wheelie, massively underestimate the balance point and flip it, knocking myself out for a few seconds.
Zoom past someone with no hands on the bars, comes to the next bend, where I put my hands back on, slow down, but still washed my front end and ending up on the deck, much to the pleasure of the guy I zoomed past before.
Trying to show off my 360s to a group of mates (and a girl!) when I over rotated, causing my rim to buckle and crack at that point and an instant puncture, resulting in a phonecall to the mother to come pick me up
Zoom past someone with no hands on the bars, comes to the next bend, where I put my hands back on, slow down, but still washed my front end and ending up on the deck, much to the pleasure of the guy I zoomed past before.
Trying to show off my 360s to a group of mates (and a girl!) when I over rotated, causing my rim to buckle and crack at that point and an instant puncture, resulting in a phonecall to the mother to come pick me up
Gassing Station | Pedal Powered | Top of Page | What's New | My Stuff