Taking an opportunity and leaping out of comfort zone

[funkyrobot]

Ha ha. I can't sabotage it.

Here until 2 pm. Have been given a nice voucher and a bag full of sweets. Spent the last half an hour distributing the sweets around the site.

Everyone has been really pleasant, apart from one person I work with. He has proven today what an arrogant so and so he is. Oh well, I'll say my goodbyes and be gone in an hour or so.

Just need to flatten my work laptop.

[funkyrobot]

Love the laptop pic. Thanks all.

I made an interesting out of office, said goodbye to my dept, said a specific goodbye to the arrogant person and left with a big smile on my face.

I have a few hot days in London and then it's the big first day at the new job.

I'll fake the confidence as much as I can.

[funkyrobot]

Thanks all. Had a lovely but very hot time in London.

Had my first day at the new job yesterday. There is a lot to do! The company is in a complete mess IT wise. This week is all about going around the site and picking up the places where I need to initially focus on.

I must admit that it's a bit daunting and quite nerve wracking. I did have some 'oh crap, what have I done?' Moments yesterday. However, it's all new and is the first time this company and I have done this. I have woken up this morning with ideas and things I need to find out about to get things started though.

I've also already been given a phone and am expected to be picking calls up in a few weeks. Gulp!

I guess the main challenge will be overcoming some of the culture there. They don't really seem to have much training in place for IT equipment. They also seem to keep doing the wrong thing with devices too (like leaving hand scanners logged in etc). These are some of the first things I need to get sorted. They need some structure and some training.

Anyway, second day today and I'm heading off on the commute shortly. Will see what I can pick up today.

It's scary stuff.

[funkyrobot]

Tyre Tread said:

In a few weeks you'll look back and wonder what the hell you were worrying about.

Keep the faith!

I will do. Thanks.

Had a very busy morning whizzing around some different departments. I'm getting a picture of where my time needs to be and what I need to learn about.

You can't beat a quick bit of lunchtime PH browsing at the new job though.

[funkyrobot]

Has anyone else ever wondered if they have made a bad decision?

I'm mid way through my second week at the new job and it still feels quite hellish. I've had more time around site and am getting to know the people and what each department does. I still have a long way to go with the system knowledge though.

I've also started training on fixing common occurring problems (which there are a lot of as the systems are old on old equipment). However, my confidence is really, really struggling.

I still feel a bit bad about the job and have been wondering a lot lately about whether or not I have made a bad decision. I feel quite nervous when I arrive here in the morning and feel quite down through the day. Simple things seem to get me like my desk and chair setup. I'm constantly having to re-adjust my chair and just don't seem to be comfortable at my desk. Have an occupational health appointment on Tuesday though so should be able to discuss this then.

I do wonder if the stress (from the pressure I put on myself) and the nerves are making my back, neck and shoulders worse.

I do feel it was the right decision to leave my last job. I couldn't have stayed there as the place wasn't doing me any good. I'm just really worried that I'm going to be in a bad place here now.

I've discussed it at length with my lovely fiancee who says that I will be nervous and won't be confident for a while because it's all new. We have decided that it would be a good idea to stick at it for at least six months to see how I get on. You can't evaluate something new like this in a few weeks or months. I can't simply jack it in either because we have a baby on the way and a mortgage.

I was full of enthusiasm and excitement for this job. However, it seems to have gone.

The people here are fine. Well, most of them. I haven't yet met anyone as bad as the crowd I left behind at the other job. I guess that's a bonus. My issues must stem from the fact that I've never been IT manager before and have never had to deal with absolutely everything. I have flashes of confidence (yesterday was good), but they are few and far between.

Oh well. Will see how it goes over time. It's a shame I couldn't update this thread with loads of positive 'it's amazing, best thing I ever did comments'. I guess that's life though.

I'll post on here with any confidence inspiring updates. Cheerio all.

[funkyrobot]

Thanks Tyre.

Have set myself the small goals and discussed these with my manager last Friday. He said I had done well as I had (in less than a week) picked up most of the lingering issues that have been plaguing this company for a while, and I had some good new ideas.

I guess my problem is confidence related. Outwardly, people wouldn't know I have confidence issues. If I don't know plenty of things about something though, I worry. I also get a bad feeling about things. I do have a bit of a history of mental wellbeing issues, so am always on the edge of feeling bad. Thinking about it, I probably felt rotten for months at my old company. After six years though, I wasn't too bothered about the job.

I like the elephant analogy. Made me smile.

Interesting that the back and neck stuff is also some sort of mental diversion.

I haven't run away yet, so will see how it goes.

Thanks again for your reply.

[funkyrobot]

Thanks again Tyre.

I'm intrigued as to what your 'other' role is.

Made a plan and am slowly working through it (as usual, I'm at the mercy of others). I guess I'm doing everything I can, I just feel bad. Will try to work on that and hope it settles down soon.

I can confirm that no elephants have been hurt too.

Cheerio.

[funkyrobot]

Thanks Wing Commander.

Must admit that I feel a bit better today. Had a wonderful chat with my fiancee this morning who echoed what you and Tyre said above.

Some great advice on this thread. Thanks all.

Oh yes, have had a few emails from a friend of mine who works at the old company. Apparently, they are having problems. My old senior colleague has broken some things, two people fell out about getting the job which was part of my old one, they apparently swarmed my old desk as I was leaving the site and the attitude still stinks.

Also, one of them has made boo boo that has cost the company £10k. Blimey!

Regardless of everything going on here, I am glad I left the old place.

On a more positive note, I've enquired this morning about my paternity leave. Have decided to take one week paternity and one week holiday. We should be ok with financially. That leaves me with just over two weeks to take before the end of March, after my two weeks in Sept/Oct.

[funkyrobot]

Anonamoose said:

I've been in my new role for 5 weeks now and I'm just starting to feel like this was maybe a good idea. In my case the job is pretty much what I've done before just a different title but some of the people have made my first few weeks pretty crap and I've been through the whole 'oh god what have I done' thing.

This week it's finally starting to feel like it might all come good. Definitely give it much more time before you start looking elsewhere. These things really do take time but I'm sure it will sort it's self out.

You can learn the job and as long as you're improving quickly I'm sure they will be understanding of the fact that it's all new to both sides. Be honest with your boss so that he understands and can help. They took you on because they thought you had potential so remember that when your feeling like your overwhelmed.

Thanks. Glad it's working out for you.

I am still only at the end of my second week, so I can't expect to be an expert on everything yet (even though users expect me to be).

[funkyrobot]

illmonkey said:

Well, my job has come to an end. But, I'm looking at contract work, which I have a few things lined up, as well as some interviews for full time positions.

I'm sure I'll go through the same motions, you really are me 4 weeks in the future!

Stay strong and keep at it, I'm sure it's the right thing to do.

Thanks. Good luck with the job search. Keep us updated.

[funkyrobot]

Mephistofleas said:

I've read this thread with interest as someone who has never been through any of the issues faced by seemingly so many, especially the OP.

Following college I only ever worked in temporary roles and they were brief service desk type positions. Before too long I was dragged into contracting from which I haven't looked back since. To be fair unless it was an absolute emergency I just couldn't envisage ever having to go through the pain of permiedom and all the politics and such like that seems to dominate.

Sure when trying to impose big IT change on permies who have pressed the same prescribed three keys for 30yrs it can get a bit heated but if it gets ridiculous it is easy to leave. I'm yet to take this course of action BTW.

I hope it all works out for you all as you spend a long time working and for it to be miserable most of the time can't be good for mental health.

Thanks.

The big new system update will be a large challenge. However, I do have specific experience of developing and installing new systems, so I hope that helps.

I guess my immediate worries have been around the fact that it's new, I don't yet know the systems and I am the only person employed by the company with IT in my role name.

I'm hoping I get there. Will see if I'm still here in six months.

[funkyrobot]

Thanks Gottans. One of my strong points is my communication.

Well, I'm into the fourth week and I'm still there. I am still a bag of nerves though and am taking each day as it comes. Still not 100% sure if I'm suitable for the job, but am sticking with it to see properly.

I think everyone here is please with me. They won't know the inner turmoil I have though.

It's especially nerve wracking as my manager has gone on a business trip for three days. He is contactable, but I am worrying about issues emerging that I need him to help with fixing. Oh well, I can only do what I can. I've still only been here just over three weeks.

Hope everyone who has contributed to this thread is getting on ok in the job world.

[funkyrobot]

Thanks chaps.

Yes, I do put tremendous pressure on myself. I am a worrier though, so struggle to apply a chill pill.

I guess I do hide it ok though because nobody else picks up on it.

Hope your job searching goes ok Tyre.

Thanks for the post Pferdestarke. I will try to calm down a bit. Inside, I do probably resemble a frightened rabbit. I just need to manage the stress better. If I can't fix something, I need to speak to someone who can and ensure it is fixed. There is nothing more I can do so I need to start telling myself that.

[funkyrobot]

Tyre Tread said:

Trying to calm down a bit doesn't work. Trying to do anything isn't the answer.

It's a permission thing. You must ALLOW youself not to get worked up about things. I know it may sound silly but there really is a difference. Attempt vs acceptance.

Don't do it because we say you have to, only allow youself to feel calmer if you think its the right thing to do.

If you want to remain stressed then you can. IYSWIM.

I see what you mean.

[funkyrobot]

Thanks scdan. Very useful advice. I'm reading it now on lunch and attempting to absorb it all.

What a great and helpful thread this has turned out to be.

[funkyrobot]

MattSqu said:

Hope it's still going well. A new job is always slightly scary, but you get used to learning things on the fly at the start. No one can be great at their job and have all the knowledge to hand as soon as they begin. If you do, you're probably selling yourself short by not stretching your skills!

One month nearly over and still there.

I'm taking the time to absorb the helpful advice given on this thread and seeing how this can help my feelings towards this role.

Still lacking the confidence, but that is something that should improve in time. We'll see.

[funkyrobot]

I've had another read of this thread this morning.

The old nerves are playing havoc as I'm on my own once again.

I have taken in everything said above, but am still struggling. I guess the hardest times for me at the moment are when my support people (manager & IT contractor) aren't around. It's difficult.

Again, I have only been here just over four weeks now. I guess it's just me that puts so much pressure on myself. I need a stern talking with myself in the toilets I think.

[funkyrobot]

Thanks again all.

I was chatting to one of my new colleagues earlier. She commented on how relaxed and calm I seem to be. I didn't realise people saw me that way.

I am cracking on, don't worry. I have had confidence issues forever and am trying to address them.

I moved office the other day to my permanent position. I've been moved out of a noisy sales office (where I was in a doorway) and into a quiet accounts office at the other end of the building. I've been able to concentrate and haven't had nearly every person stopping by to ask me something just because they have seen me.

I've managed to begin getting to grips with the company's chosen report writing software and have delivered an edited report. My first one here. I guess I'm steadily getting there.

The nerves will always be there when my safety net has gone. It's up to me to manage them and just try to push through the headless chicken syndrome it creates. My fiancee has told me numerous times that I'm a logical, intelligent, but most of all really nice person. I just have the worry issue that is driven by my lack of confidence.

I will try my hardest to get through it, learn more and become better equipped to handle the job.

I am trying, believe me. I wear my heart on my sleeve and am not afraid to tell people how I really feel (when appropriate).

Thanks everyone.

[funkyrobot]

Thought I'd bump this thread and add some updates.

Well, I'm still in the new(ish) job. I'm more settled, however still worry about things and get nervous etc. That seems to be my nature.

Had a big worry this last month or so as I attempted to gain some ground on a project that had been languishing here for two years. Managed to make some headway even though the deadline recently passed. I think there is more to be done with it though.

Even though I didn't think I had done anything special with the above, my manager spoke to me the other day about it. He said I had done well. He then went on to say he was taking me off probation early as he was pleased with how I've been doing. Finally, he gave me a pay rise. I wasn't expecting that at all!

So, still here, still cracking on and we'll see how the next five or so months go.

Thanks for the advice everyone.

[funkyrobot]

illmonkey said:

Sounds like you're not only doing well, but they are noticing as well!

I've been doing contracting for since Oct, really enjoying it, although it can get slow at times. So glad to be out of where I was, it's taken so long to forget about everything at my last place, it still crops up in my head, but I happily push it to the back of my mind and smile, knowing I won't have to deal with their ste again.

Onwards and upwards!

I'm the same (in relation to thinking about the old place). I still keep in touch with two old colleagues. We have the odd chat about how they are getting on and what's changed etc. It makes me smile.

Glad I made the move.