Complicated work situation, advice sought

[whatleytom]

Hi all,

Currently I live in Swindon and work for a company there. I've worked there for four years and had three different jobs, all promotions from the one prior. My latest promotion came just over a week ago, after having been on a development plan. (Originally this was 6months, but I was promoted after just 2)

All well and good, but for a little while now I've wanted to move to London. I'm still fairly young but at this point either need to buy a house in Swindon, or take the opportunity to do something different.

I already have one job offer on the table in London. However several weeks ago I applied to an internal vacancy based in London. I have an interview for that this Wednesday. I would prefer this role out of the two.

Now I haven't been forthcoming about this with my manager as I was unsure on whether I was going to go for the job, however I've decided it's what I want so I talked to the current manager today about the interview.

Now I am the most experienced team member by some margin, other than myself there is next to no experience. For a long while the team has been understaffed, should be 3/4. While I have been on development plan has just been 2 of us. So my leaving would be pretty bad for the team, and department.

They asked me to withdraw my application, as essentially they believe I owe them for having been promoted. And asked me to think about this due to the recent recruitment situation. They asked me to take this as a compliment as the team is being built around me.

I explained I wanted to move jobs largely due to location reasons, but was a little bit gobsmacked to be asked to withdraw my application, and am fairly sure I won't be.

While I'm thankful for the development opportunity given to me I don't feel like I should be made to feel guilt over leaving the team understaffed and completely without experience. As far as I'm aware this is not my responsibility.

Either way, if I'm unsuccessful with the internal app, I will take the other job so will be leaving. But at this point they are unaware of this. They would feel less pain with the internal app, due to a longer notice period.

I guess I'm just asking others what they think of the situation and what they would do.

[NormalWisdom]

Go to the interview and discuss the situation with the hiring manager. Given that it is internal he may be able to work a deal with your current manager whereby everyone wins (bit of notice, 50/50 jobs for a period or suchlike).

Look after Number One

[Ray Luxury-Yacht]

NormalWisdom said:

Look after Number One

This exactly. I've been in several positions in companies where I was indispensible one minute, and then cast asunder in the manner akin to throwing away an old office chair the next, when money or company direction became the focus.

I would never put myself out for a company ever again. Loyalty went out the window years ago for most boards, directors and owners - so my loyalty to companies has gone the same way.

I'm not all bitter and twisted (well, maybe a bit ) but like the other thread about leaving work at 5pm on the dot, my remit now is to work as well and as hard as I can during my allocated hours, whilst remembering that I am doing it for me, and my own financial remuneration only. Basically, fk them!

Life, as you'll find if you haven't already, is way too short to waste on being nice and playing the white man for any company. There's no real thanks or gratitude on their part for it.


In fact, I would say that this is already illustrated in your company's reaction. Ok, I understand that you leaving will cause them a problem, but their reaction was to immediately think of themselves, in a rather harsh, selfish manner, attempting to make you feel guilty.

Any upstanding company would at best try to be positive, understand your personal reasons for leaving, tell you that you'll be missed, and wish you good luck on your journey and life. Or at worst, try to offer you a better deal to stay, instead of sniping at you. (Although these types of counter-offers rarely work out in the end).

I say go for it, good luck, and don't look back.

[bint]

I echo the above, if you're that valued, the hiring manager will hear about it and yes, look after #1.

[Mojooo]

Its a dog eat dog world and essentially it does coem down to look aftern ubmer one.

I can certainyl see why they might be miffed if they have ivnested time and money in you - but by the same token they can bump you off at any time.

[BMWBen]

You probably don't want to work for people like that. If you are unable to move to the role you want, look externally.

[ChasW]

I have been in all three positions in this triangle. Hopefully the new manager is strong because unless you withdraw your application, which I would not advocate, the managers will have to sort it out between them. I agree with others here in that you have to look out for yourself.

[davepoth]

bint said:

I echo the above, if you're that valued, the hiring manager will hear about it and yes, look after #1.

Exactly. With internal moves it's all a little bit incestuous anyway - so it's a safe bet that your manager has at least some idea of how likely it is that you'll get the new role. If they were worried enough to ask you to withdraw the application it probably means that you've got quite a good chance.

Your manager will learn to accept this - by only moving within the company your experience isn't lost to the firm; you'll be at the end of a telephone if anything tricky arises.

[rossi1001]

Ray Luxury-Yacht said:

.......In fact, I would say that this is already illustrated in your company's reaction. Ok, I understand that you leaving will cause them a problem, but their reaction was to immediately think of themselves, in a rather harsh, selfish manner, attempting to make you feel guilty.

Any upstanding company would at best try to be positive, understand your personal reasons for leaving, tell you that you'll be missed, and wish you good luck on your journey and life. Or at worst, try to offer you a better deal to stay, instead of sniping at you. (Although these types of counter-offers rarely work out in the end).

I say go for it, good luck, and don't look back.

Great advice above. The immediate reaction of your company was pretty harsh and selfish. My previous company was like this and my notice period was hellish. Directors telling me the new company was crap, dishing out personal anecdotes and abuse about my new CEO and all sorts. Truly pathetic.

However the first company I left couldn't thank me enough, wished me all the best and gave me a great send off, and this is how it should be! Though I think it's sadly probably pretty rare these days.

Definitely do NOT pull out and good luck!

[whatleytom]

rossi1001 said:

Ray Luxury-Yacht said:

.......In fact, I would say that this is already illustrated in your company's reaction. Ok, I understand that you leaving will cause them a problem, but their reaction was to immediately think of themselves, in a rather harsh, selfish manner, attempting to make you feel guilty.

Any upstanding company would at best try to be positive, understand your personal reasons for leaving, tell you that you'll be missed, and wish you good luck on your journey and life. Or at worst, try to offer you a better deal to stay, instead of sniping at you. (Although these types of counter-offers rarely work out in the end).

I say go for it, good luck, and don't look back.

Great advice above. The immediate reaction of your company was pretty harsh and selfish. My previous company was like this and my notice period was hellish. Directors telling me the new company was crap, dishing out personal anecdotes and abuse about my new CEO and all sorts. Truly pathetic.

However the first company I left couldn't thank me enough, wished me all the best and gave me a great send off, and this is how it should be! Though I think it's sadly probably pretty rare these days.

Definitely do NOT pull out and good luck!

Thanks for the advice guys, had another meeting today with said manager. I went in expecting to have a further fight on my hands when I told them I would be continuing with the application. However he had done a complete U-turn and could now see things from my point of view. In the end even offered any help I needed to prepare for the interview and wished me luck, so not all bad. Just have to hope the interview goes well on Wednesday. Only issue is now the timing will be very tight between either having to give notice for the job I have been offered, and finding out the outcome from this interview!

[Terminator X]

"They asked me to withdraw my application"

Do your best to not laugh out loud

TX.

[TwistingMyMelon]

Do it!

I'm Swindon based (well just outside), think I recognize your name off Strava!

I wish I worked in London more when I was younger, I'm happy now, I just wish I really went for it in my 20s, as there are so many more opportunities in London

Not sure whether it would be worth tactfully raising it in the interview for the new job though...forget that, just read how your boss changed his mind!

[andy-xr]

swerni said:

You owe them nothing, they didn't promote you as a favour.
Your current manager is trying to protect his best interests, if they were a half descent manager, they should be trying to protect yours.

As had been said, do what's best for you.

Managers are weird. Some are parents too, and when asked ifthey'd want their kids being the best they could be, or would they want them to stay at home and not learn new things, they say they want their kids to be the best possible, fly the roost, come back home if it goes wrong.

Never seems to translate across to employees or juniors