Bullying at work

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Discussion

anonymous-user

Original Poster:

53 months

Sunday 19th March 2017
quotequote all
Well it happened to me last week and I not sure how to react/deal with it so after a bit of advice if I may.

Basically there have been some changes to how the department works and we now effectively have 2 'project managers' who were formally team leaders. One of these is a micro manager and is demanding lots of extra documents. Some are justified and others speculative. When I questioned the value of the speculative documents he eventually came out with the 'because I want it' justification.

Then he accused me of not being a team player loudly in front of the whole office (approx 15 people), then there was a series of e-mails about this and copied to my manager and people who are not directly relevant.

I walked away from the initial confrontation as I might have regretted my actions, the matter is known about higher up the business but should I push for some action through HR or leave the managers to deal with it?

Any thoughts appreciated.
Thanks




bitchstewie

50,809 posts

209 months

Sunday 19th March 2017
quotequote all
Is there some detail missing because reading that one way, you're asking whether to go to HR because your boss asked you to do something you disagreed with so you said no?

Sir Lord Poopie

212 posts

89 months

Sunday 19th March 2017
quotequote all
Any thoughts appreciated?

When I got bullied at work I gave back much worse than I got, and I really piled it on. Even went 'toe to toe' with one of them on a vacant site in the middle of nowhere on a Friday evening and got suspended - no proof of the goons claims however and I treated it as an additional week of annual leave. Probably didn't help me in the long run as I was managed out eventually, but I stand by my methods.

Best bet may be to involve HR. You'll become known as 'that guy' either way, but you'll get more respect from my approach. GL.

anonymous-user

Original Poster:

53 months

Sunday 19th March 2017
quotequote all
The 'project manager' isn't my boss, his is just one project of several I am working on but I do this at the direction of my manager. We are very busy with current projects and writing 'speculative' documents that no one has ever asked for or needed before in over 15 years is diverting valuable time away from higher priority work.

I am not concerned about him voicing his displeasure at not getting what he 'believes' he needs but more the way he did it.

This should have been in a meeting room at the very least and not getting bawled out in the office in front of everyone which is at the least 'unprofessional'.

bitchstewie

50,809 posts

209 months

Sunday 19th March 2017
quotequote all
gottans said:
This should have been in a meeting room at the very least and not getting bawled out in the office in front of everyone which is at the least 'unprofessional'.
Can't argue with that but I've been on the giving and receiving end of the same thing and not once did it cross my mind to involve HR.

HR aren't there for your benefit they're there for the company.

Andehh

7,107 posts

205 months

Sunday 19th March 2017
quotequote all
Sit down with a senior,director, MD etc someone at the top. Explain you want to avoid HR, but that it need reporting.

Keep it short and professional. Don't use the word bullying unless you really need to but explain said persons attitude is unprofessional, effecting morale, risks embarassing the department/company etc.

As has been said, HR are there to protect the company & smooth these things over. They are NOT there "for you" desbite how the company may portray them.

anonymous-user

Original Poster:

53 months

Sunday 19th March 2017
quotequote all
bhstewie said:
HR aren't there for your benefit they're there for the company.
I know they are there to cover the companies arse if it ends up at a tribunal but they still have anti-bullying policies that employees have to abide by.

Maybe I missed the boat and should have had the standup slanging match in the office..

bitchstewie

50,809 posts

209 months

Sunday 19th March 2017
quotequote all
gottans said:
I know they are there to cover the companies arse if it ends up at a tribunal but they still have anti-bullying policies that employees have to abide by.

Maybe I missed the boat and should have had the standup slanging match in the office..
The stand up slanging match often has the benefit of being water under the bridge once it's over and done with whilst HR makes things official.

Given we only have the way you've explained it I'd suggest it sounds more like a heated argument than anything I'd recognise as "bullying".

I wasn't there so don't know what was said or the tone, and I don't know your constitution as to how sensitive you are, but all I can do is repeat my personal view which is do not involve HR unless you feel you absolutely have to.

anonymous-user

Original Poster:

53 months

Sunday 19th March 2017
quotequote all
Appreciate the comments, I am inclined to leave it to management for the moment and see what happens but am making notes.

As I am what you would call a single resource in the department we do need to find a way of working on the project.

MitchT

15,789 posts

208 months

Sunday 19th March 2017
quotequote all
Depends how the wider land lies as to how you can deal with it. The OH was bullied by a manager who wanted to go places within the business and was quite prepared to make life a misery for anyone who might get in the way on account of being more credible than he was. He seemed to have a particular issue with strong, intelligent women. Anyway, after months of the OH collecting evidence it came to a head with him trumping up a disciplinary for absolutely nothing. The head of HR - a woman - backed him to the hilt and refused to even look at any of the OH's evidence, same with everyone else higher up who got involved. Staff turnover in his department rocketed and women who hadn't left reported driving home in tears every day and dreading coming to work, but he seemed to be "Mr Teflon". As people left he replaced them with incompetent "yes" people who wouldn't be a threat to him. Those at the top liked him and that was that. The only way was to leave. Some people are just liked by the right people and are seemingly immune to any comeback for making others' lives a misery. If there's one where you work and they're somewhere in the "food chain" above you the only way is to get out.

davepoth

29,395 posts

198 months

Sunday 19th March 2017
quotequote all
Bullying isn't acceptable at all, and I think any reasonable manager would appreciate that.

Go to your immediate line manager and discuss it with them - explain how having that sort of thing said in the middle of the office made you feel, and make sure that your manager is completely on-board with the issue. The trick with these events is to make friends and not enemies as you go through the process.

condor

8,837 posts

247 months

Sunday 19th March 2017
quotequote all
You could say that you have higher priority work that you need to complete first, and if these other documents are so important to the project manager you'd need an assistant to help you as you're too busy doing x,y,z...


The Moose

22,821 posts

208 months

Sunday 19th March 2017
quotequote all
Out of interest, OP, how have you been bullied in this situation? I just can't see it?

conanius

741 posts

197 months

Monday 20th March 2017
quotequote all
The guy sounds like a tool/someone who can't cope with the challenges of people management,.

Have a chat with your boss over a coffee and just ask if you can work for the other PM guy as this bloke is clearly bonkers.

mp3manager

4,254 posts

195 months

Monday 20th March 2017
quotequote all
bhstewie said:
HR aren't there for your benefit they're there for the company.
Absolutely this.
I was TUPE'd into my current employer and on my first day after the induction meeting, I was cornered in a quiet part of the office where nobody could see or hear and I was told, 'You're not welcome here'.....by the head of HR!

I'm still there but they're still trying to sack me, simply because I'm disabled and they don't like that.

omniflow

2,547 posts

150 months

Monday 20th March 2017
quotequote all
The list of documents required as part of the project deliverables shouldn't be "made up" by the Project Manager. They should be from a pre-defined list according to the type of project and the project methodology your company follows.


Vaud

50,291 posts

154 months

Monday 20th March 2017
quotequote all
mp3manager said:
Absolutely this.
I was TUPE'd into my current employer and on my first day after the induction meeting, I was cornered in a quiet part of the office where nobody could see or hear and I was told, 'You're not welcome here'.....by the head of HR!

I'm still there but they're still trying to sack me, simply because I'm disabled and they don't like that.
I know he doesn't post anymore, but you may still be able to drop BreadVan72 a line via his profile. He may have good advice and he is an uber-specialist in employment law.

curlie467

7,650 posts

200 months

Tuesday 21st March 2017
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The Moose said:
Out of interest, OP, how have you been bullied in this situation? I just can't see it?
I agree.

The Moose

22,821 posts

208 months

Wednesday 22nd March 2017
quotequote all
curlie467 said:
The Moose said:
Out of interest, OP, how have you been bullied in this situation? I just can't see it?
I agree.
I'm not trying to be confrontational. I am genuinely interested as to what's bullying in the op

Pickled Piper

6,334 posts

234 months

Wednesday 22nd March 2017
quotequote all
Andehh said:
Sit down with a senior,director, MD etc someone at the top. Explain you want to avoid HR, but that it need reporting.

Keep it short and professional. Don't use the word bullying unless you really need to but explain said persons attitude is unprofessional, effecting morale, risks embarassing the department/company etc.

As has been said, HR are there to protect the company & smooth these things over. They are NOT there "for you" desbite how the company may portray them.
It dose rather depend on the size and culture of your Company. However, I agree with the above. Just notify your line manager of this chaps "inappropriate" behaviour.