Bands - worth the effort?

Bands - worth the effort?

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scrubchub

Original Poster:

1,844 posts

139 months

Wednesday 17th June 2015
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Ok, time for a vent.

Been in a band for years, and due to some serious duplicity on the part of other members, myself and one band member have formed another one band. Chance of a gig comes up, so I bring it up. New singer mentions that she is worried that we wouldn't be ready as we are fairly new, I point out that we have enough songs and a few practice sessions to polish them up so we will definitely be good to go. Rest of the band is up for it, no more mentioned, seems a goer.

Now we get an arsey message saying how she made it clear that she didn't want to do the gig and gave up mentioning that because no one seemed to be listening (it was mentioned just the one time). Also, I've made her life awkward because her sister is heavily pregnant and she is supposed to be looking after her that weekend. How I was supposed to know that when it wasn't mentioned I have no idea.

Frustrating as I always make myself available for gigs, even to the point of cancelling other plans (within reason). Partly because I don't like letting people down, partly because practising is expensive, and partly because, well, you know, it's the reason why I am in a fking band in the first fking place. Paid gig = make yourself available unless impossible. Now I have one band member that can't gig at all in July as he is having a birthday party at some point during the month and doesn't know when, and another who has already said there'll be no gigs in the whole of October so she can get ready for her wedding. £40 every fking week on a practice room, and for what exactly?

Two bands in a row with a pain in the arse 'front person'. I find myself missing the days of 4 guys having a laugh and being mates as much as a band. I actually prefer female singers to male singers but never had any problems with male band members. Probably just a coincidence mind.

Anyone else feel that their band isn't worth the effort sometimes? I feel like just packing it in and being a 'bedroom guitarist', but as I'm a guitar teacher, I really need to be gigging I feel.

As an aside, anyone in South Wales want to start a band?!

Edited by scrubchub on Wednesday 17th June 00:32

Jazzy Jefferson

728 posts

140 months

Wednesday 17th June 2015
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scrubchub said:
£40 every fking week on a practice room, and for what exactly?
Don't forget your travel costs, Instrument cost and how much were the lessons all those years ago!!?

I do the band thing, have done for years and only now is it starting to show signs of paying off. Hang in there mate, get yourself involved with other bands, and play as much as you can.
Don't worry, there are aholes in every walk of life. It seems the music industry has a few extras. Usually singers wink
It's taken me a while to find the right group of people, but once you do, it works very well. None of this getting arsey nonsense.

They key to it is fun. I nearly gave up a few years ago as the band I was in at the time was more hassle than it was fun. I took a few weeks off, left that band. And now things are far better. The second you stop having fun, then change/jack it in.

Edited by Jazzy Jefferson on Wednesday 17th June 10:31

Tom_C76

1,923 posts

187 months

Wednesday 17th June 2015
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Front the band yourself?

FWIW, we've had endless issues with bass players, we're on No 10 in 18 months. Second drummer too, and there are frequent times that I feel like chopping it all in.

However, the frontman and I go out with two acoustic guitars a couple of times a month for a laugh and a bit of beer money. This helps keep me sane, is much easier to organise as there's only two of us to be available, and better paid as we get 60-75% of the money shared between 40% of the people.

That said, it doesn't compare with the joy of standing in front of a roaring half stack when things are going well...

Zod

35,295 posts

257 months

Wednesday 17th June 2015
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Les McQueen said:
It's a st business.

Mad March Taffy

508 posts

118 months

Wednesday 17th June 2015
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+1

Was in a band for a few years and it just became a pain in the ar$e to organise 5 people to be in the same place at the same time to actually rehearse - getting gigs was also a pain in terms of people all taking the time to try to get this sorted.

I gave up in the end

slyelessar

359 posts

107 months

Thursday 18th June 2015
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Last band I was in, the vocallist thought he was more talented than he actually was. I know this happens a lot, but damn...

Yeah sometimes bands can get a bit... well not worth the effort. I do miss playing in a band though.

Z06George

2,519 posts

188 months

Thursday 18th June 2015
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I'm leaving two of the bands I play in after I've done the gigs we have lined up for summer. When it becomes a massive chore to do anything regarding the band then I think it's time to call it a day IMO. I much prefer doing contract/session work, even if the people are idiots you're not with them long enough to get worked up.

Pete317

1,430 posts

221 months

Thursday 18th June 2015
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Unfortunately, that's about par for the course when it comes to bands.
It's one of the big reasons I stopped being involved with bands about 10 years ago.
It's a pity, because I really miss playing, and there's not too many openings around for middle-aged solo bass players.

RaptureJames

42 posts

122 months

Thursday 18th June 2015
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Worth it but it is certainly a chore weeding out the flakes, the talk a good games and the total fking weakeners.

most people in bands are usually at least one of those, if its just for fun then pick good people, if its more serious for you than that prioritise proper players and reliability.




dojo

741 posts

134 months

Thursday 18th June 2015
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Or the other option is that you get players who are always available but are always skint and have transport etc, either way its bull

Nowadays I've resorted to just scoring all the parts out and having recordings then I cang deps in if people can't do shows. Its a load more work but at least it means I can retain control smile

On a side note I don't think that you have to gig out just because you're a teacher, its good for extra income and to get your name out there but not necessary.

scrubchub

Original Poster:

1,844 posts

139 months

Friday 19th June 2015
quotequote all
It is a little surprising to see the number of other guys who have similar feelings to me about it. I have spoken to the singer involved, and of course she has managed to get her own way. Gig isn't a goer. Drummer in the band not best pleased, same as me. I'll make it clear what the situation needs to be in the future though - we all have to make ourselves available for gigs or I won't be hanging around. Spending more money on practice sessions than we earn on gigging is not acceptable. What people don't seem to appreciate is that when a good, paying gig is turned down, then that person is preventing 3 other people from earning money that evening, and babysitting your pregnant sister (or, sitting on the sofa watching a film and having a takeaway) isn't a good enough reason to turn something down. Christ, I had family plans that weekend but it didn't occur to me for a second that they should take priority.

I'm particularly on a downer at the moment die to current experiences with another band. Long story, but I'm in the mood for a vent, so no offence taken if you don't want to read on!

Been in this band for years and known the drummer since school (we used to sit next to each other in geography in 6th form). Had a bassist who's been with us for the best part of a decade. A few years ago, a female singer joins the band. Decent singer, she can really belt it out, but not the best at hitting the notes. When I've watched some videos of us, she is clearly the weak link. A few months ago we did some blues with a saxophonist taking a few solos. The singer kept on starting the next verse at the turnaround, which sounded awful, ruined the saxophone solo, and is quite frankly, pretty god damn amateurish.

Anyway, not long after joining us, she started another band. No problem with that. They were doing different stuff to us anyway, and she can do whatever she wants in her own time. She can't find a drummer, so my long term drummer plays with them and this turns out to be permanent. Fine, as I wouldn't want to do the songs they were doing (punked up versions of Katy Perry and Lady Gaga - no thanks). Plus, I don't want to spend more time with her than necessary, as she is nothing short of completely fking mental. Plenty of instances of this, that I won't go into as a long story becomes ever longer!

Over time, we notice that their set is getting ever closer to ours (they leave set lists in the PA case), until it gets to the point that they are basically the same band as us. Still no real problem with us (though I don't see the appeal in being in 2 identical bands, i'd rather put the extra effort into getting good with 1 personally).

Soon, drummer and singer are 'invovled' and then engaged. All gigs are going to the other band. On one occasion, my bassist fills in for them at short notice and he is incredulous at the level of the guitarist, who can hardly play. Says he'll never do it again, which he hasn't. Last year, we get a gig in a place we've played before. My bassist can't do it, so the others jump in and do the gig with their other band. I bring this up, saying this is wrong, I'm free to do the gig, so just ditching me is seriously poor form, especially as the venue asked for our band specifically, and in a similar situation last year, the bassist for my band filled in to the show with their other band. Time to start looking for another band.

The straw that broke the camels back for me completely now - Earlier in the year, I get in touch with my local pub, which also happens to be our favourite (and best paying) venue, asking if they've got any gigs. Manager says he has spoken to the singer and we are booked in. I think this is strange, get in touch with singer, no answer. Then it clicks. I go on their website, and sure enough they have got gigs there. They have 2 gigs booked in, so at least they could have given 1 to each. Then it occurs to me further that the manager at the pub thought that we were booked in. I check with him, and sure enough, this absolute cow has booked her band into our favourite venue, where they have never played and aren't known, using our name, so the manager thought he was getting us.

I messed with her head a bit, didn't let on that I knew. We end up dong the gigs. A couple of days later she finally gets in touch, graciously accepting my thanks for the gigs. I have no idea how they thought they would get away with that, as the pub pays through an agency, and the money goes into my bank account before I dole it out. Meanwhile, myself and the bassist are forming another band without them knowing. I'm going to steal all the venues that we've built up before leaving in a blaze of glory.

Congratulations to anyone that got to the end of that.

Oh yeah, the new band that was just formed is the one that I started the thread about. Worth the effort? Like fk it is.

Edited by scrubchub on Friday 19th June 11:26

scrubchub

Original Poster:

1,844 posts

139 months

Friday 19th June 2015
quotequote all
Z06George said:
I'm leaving two of the bands I play in after I've done the gigs we have lined up for summer. When it becomes a massive chore to do anything regarding the band then I think it's time to call it a day IMO. I much prefer doing contract/session work, even if the people are idiots you're not with them long enough to get worked up.
How did you get into the session style work? I'd love to get involved with that kind of thing, even on a very small scale. I've been playing and teaching as a job now since 2006, so I'd like to think I'm up to the necessary standard (hopefully). Though I'm aware that it's very competitive.

davidd

6,443 posts

283 months

Friday 19th June 2015
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Blimey you lot make our band seem simple.

6 of us, all blokes, 4 in our mid to late 40's the other two in early to mid 20's (singer and drummer).

Oddly enough, although we all have egos, and argue the toss about the stuff we play, we all get on really well. None of us old boys are particularly good nor precious about what we do and so there is a lot of give and take, I think that helps.

The three important things about being in a band for me are.

Being in a gang with like minded people I enjoy spending time with.
Getting a bit better at playing.
Gigging a bit.

At some point I expect our singer and drummer will move on as they are better than the rest of us (the singer is a good singer and a brilliant frontman) so the dynamic will change.

Of course there are times when we are arguing about songs to try and setlist order and I've just made a pile of mistakes at practise when I think about packing it in but then I remember that this is just a fun thing to do for us. Sort of puts in perspective for me.

I think the other important difference for us is that we don't do it for the money and only book gigs miles in advance around everyones diaries.

DanoS4

863 posts

193 months

Friday 19th June 2015
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I know your pain. Feckin bands biggrin

I compare it to trying to herd cats. Usually, there's 1 or 2 who lead/drag the machine from gig to gig too.

I stepped back from doing the organising just because it was too much effort for such little reward, and the missed gig opportunities due to poor communication or just not being available... WOW.

Glad I'm out of it now tbh, although I do miss the playing - I dep now. Much easier!

scrubchub

Original Poster:

1,844 posts

139 months

Friday 19th June 2015
quotequote all
davidd said:
Blimey you lot make our band seem simple.

6 of us, all blokes, 4 in our mid to late 40's the other two in early to mid 20's (singer and drummer).

Oddly enough, although we all have egos, and argue the toss about the stuff we play, we all get on really well. None of us old boys are particularly good nor precious about what we do and so there is a lot of give and take, I think that helps.

The three important things about being in a band for me are.

Being in a gang with like minded people I enjoy spending time with.
Getting a bit better at playing.
Gigging a bit.

At some point I expect our singer and drummer will move on as they are better than the rest of us (the singer is a good singer and a brilliant frontman) so the dynamic will change.

Of course there are times when we are arguing about songs to try and setlist order and I've just made a pile of mistakes at practise when I think about packing it in but then I remember that this is just a fun thing to do for us. Sort of puts in perspective for me.

I think the other important difference for us is that we don't do it for the money and only book gigs miles in advance around everyones diaries.
My band used to be like that - 4 guys hanging around and playing some music. No real aggro or anything. All went weird the second that we got a girl singer in (who started shagging the drummer).

Z06George

2,519 posts

188 months

Friday 19th June 2015
quotequote all
scrubchub said:
Z06George said:
I'm leaving two of the bands I play in after I've done the gigs we have lined up for summer. When it becomes a massive chore to do anything regarding the band then I think it's time to call it a day IMO. I much prefer doing contract/session work, even if the people are idiots you're not with them long enough to get worked up.
How did you get into the session style work? I'd love to get involved with that kind of thing, even on a very small scale. I've been playing and teaching as a job now since 2006, so I'd like to think I'm up to the necessary standard (hopefully). Though I'm aware that it's very competitive.
Started off by filling in for my drum teacher on the odd thing he couldn't do, then I did a few with him (orchestral stuff mainly). Just from that you meet a few more people then a few more, it's taken me a while to build up the network of people I have and by no means am I busy with it at the moment, I've had to get a proper job as I couldn't make a decent continuous income from it. The main thing I've found is to be able to offer people something extra, so in my case I'm a drum kit player first but I can play tuned/unturned percussion which very few drummer seemed to be interested in.

davegreg

1,099 posts

188 months

Friday 19th June 2015
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Had some great times and many good laughs playing in bands in my youth, even released an album. I'm 51 now and much prefer to go and watch a band than gig myself, still knock about with a muso crowd though and play stuff at home. smile

Skyedriver

17,661 posts

281 months

Wednesday 24th June 2015
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A late good friend of mine, excellent sax & clarinet player, main stream jazz, used to hate trying to organise bands and preferred depping. He was good and got the call from some pretty well known travelling bands and local bands. In addition he wasn't playing the same stuff every time.
RIP Trev

drumsterphil

474 posts

222 months

Wednesday 24th June 2015
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I'm going through a similar dilemma at the moment but for different reasons. I left my last band about 6 months having been with them for 5 years. Was just an original material metal band playing pubs around the North East etc No ambitions, just to write decent music (to us anyways) and play gigs.

Anyway, due to circumstances of moving away and an injury that had me stop playing for a while I'm now on the lookout for a new band. I had this idea that forming a hair metal cover band would be fun - just play a load of songs that people knew and would open up better venues etc. But the trouble is that I think my last band spoilt me - we all just clicked (the writing was easy, we, by and large, all got on, socialised and has a great time just playing music).

At the same time I was also playing live drums for an EBM artist and that was more serious, better venues, paid gigs, crowds; however, I bailed as at heart I'm just a rocker and I never had any real ambitions in music, just play and enjoy myself.

The dilemma comes in that I'm not sure if I can be bothered to form a band again. It's unlikely that I'll have the same chemistry with another group so thinking of just giving it a rest and perhaps pick up at some stage or just not bothering altogether.

I think the right group of people obviously makes a band worthwhile, very little better than playing on stage with your mates and everything clicking; however, getting that group is very rare I reckon based on my experiences.

HOGEPH

5,249 posts

185 months

Wednesday 24th June 2015
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My brother works on the theory that out of 10 gigs, 6 will be ste, 3 will be ok and 1 will be fantastic and the whole reason you're doing all this nonsense.

I'm averaging about 8 ste gigs...