Quote it up with Phoenix Nights

[nammynake]

Potter: "you swept that cock up yet?"

[Funkateer]

"Nice legs...what time do they open?"

[soxboy]

The auditions at the end always crack me up, especially the woman with the ping pong balls, the dove going into the extractor fan and the one-legged Elvis:

'Do you do anything else?'
'Aye, Blue Suede Shoe'

[General Price]

Achtung,Das Jackpot.

[Justin Cyder]

In that scene at the funeral where the feller delivering the eulogy says sternly: A bit of respect for the captain.

Then plonks his pint on the coffin.

[essexplumber]

"Ger'im put down"

[TwigtheWonderkid]

Justin Cyder said:

In that scene at the funeral where the feller delivering the eulogy says sternly: A bit of respect for the captain.

Then plonks his pint on the coffin.

Yes, that's just before someone wins the jackpot on Das Boot, the Nazi fruit machine.

[-crookedtail-]

TwigtheWonderkid said:

Yes, that's just before someone wins the jackpot on Das Boot, the Nazi fruit machine.

"I don't care if it's the last of the mohicans, I ordered The Matrix I did not order Das Boot"

[essexplumber]

Brian at the weekly meeting "I mean how hard can it for't ride a boat"

Young Kenny "Oh its not easy, they move about a lot, you have to hold on to its horns really tight"

The whole table looks at him, confused.

Young Kenny "Oh, sorry I thought you said Goat"

[timlongs]

First episode with the builders on stage with Jerry:

"It'll never get finished with you and the pissing Lighthouse Family up there, get down the pair of ya."

[Ciaran]

Probably already done:

"I getting the word.......nonce"

[Justin Cyder]

You're Tracey Burns! I didn't recognise yer without yer hoola hoop!

Excuse while I go and sack my backing band.




Talent trek finals night:


You can reach me by railway....Neeeeerrrrrrrrrrr Nuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

[DanB7290]

On the Talent Trek final again, with Kenny Sr as Britney:

KS "I must confess, I still believe"
Les Alanos, in a deep, uninterested tone "still believe"


and of course, when they're all sat there at the end of it, Kenny still in the Britney costume, Brian turns to him and says "close your legs, you little slut"

[GALLARDOGUY]

And guess who was lying next to me...

Bonny Langford!

... I nearly broke her back!

[Quattromaster]

Anybody going to see the live show, starting tomorrow night at the MEN in Manchester, think it's running for 16 nights, all in aid of comic relief.

I've two tickets for the 14th, can't wait, ding dang do.

I'm a wheelchair user and been thinking about going as Brian Potter , what's the worst that can happen, I'll get thrown out or on the DVD, LOL.

Edited by Quattromaster on Friday 30th January 18:45

[miniman]

I want to moonwalk but life's a sthouse.

[soxboy]

Justin Cyder said:

Talent trek finals night:


You can reach me by railway....Neeeeerrrrrrrrrrr Nuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

Cross the desert like an Arab man.....'Hallah Balla Allah Walla'

My wife gets very irritated if we hear that song and I do the sound effects.

[Sprouts]

Mixu Paatelainen

[hepy]

Love length

[24lemons]

PYSKICK?!! what the hells a piss kick?!?! its suppost to say psychic...tit...