money saving, girlfriend, first home. Advice?
Discussion
yeah i would never get paid into a joint account, i wouldn't trust anyone with my money.
We don't control each others money but i have advised her to cut back on the spending a bit until she can match what i am saving each month. I don't think im being unreasonable by asking that, am i? We are meant to be doing this together so our savings should be 50/50 in my eyes. She does earn more than me to be fair and doesn't have a car to pay for.
My suggestion didn't go down too well.
We don't control each others money but i have advised her to cut back on the spending a bit until she can match what i am saving each month. I don't think im being unreasonable by asking that, am i? We are meant to be doing this together so our savings should be 50/50 in my eyes. She does earn more than me to be fair and doesn't have a car to pay for.
My suggestion didn't go down too well.
photosnob said:
I've got a mate who is a mortgage broker. There was a time you could just say I earn 100k and get a mortgage.They have stopped that now. Seems a little odd - I can walk in and get credit on a car work 60k by just saying I'm earning X, they will give me a credit card and I can make it up. But for a mortgage the rules now say they have to see your life story. To me it's a bit crazy - whilst it's the biggest investment most people make, it's also the only one that will almost certainly appreciate. As mortgages are secured against the house the banks don't really lose if the person can't pay.
If it were legal it would be really good business giving anyone a mortgage no matter what, as long as they had a 15/20% deposit.
You must be new to planet Earth, let me tell you a story about the recent credit crunch...If it were legal it would be really good business giving anyone a mortgage no matter what, as long as they had a 15/20% deposit.
Oakey said:
You must be new to planet Earth, let me tell you a story about the recent credit crunch...
OP, get a credit card if you can. Put your petrol on it. Put your weekly shopping on it. Put the clothes you buy on it, but pay it off straight away as if you were paying cash.
You need to build up a credit history. Also get your wage put into your bank. If you want a mortgage the lender will want to see an actual wage going in to your bank.
Oakey said:
photosnob said:
I've got a mate who is a mortgage broker. There was a time you could just say I earn 100k and get a mortgage.They have stopped that now. Seems a little odd - I can walk in and get credit on a car work 60k by just saying I'm earning X, they will give me a credit card and I can make it up. But for a mortgage the rules now say they have to see your life story. To me it's a bit crazy - whilst it's the biggest investment most people make, it's also the only one that will almost certainly appreciate. As mortgages are secured against the house the banks don't really lose if the person can't pay.
If it were legal it would be really good business giving anyone a mortgage no matter what, as long as they had a 15/20% deposit.
You must be new to planet Earth, let me tell you a story about the recent credit crunch...If it were legal it would be really good business giving anyone a mortgage no matter what, as long as they had a 15/20% deposit.
I bought a new bungalow in 1988 for £37,500 and sold it three years later for £90,000
Two years later my buyers could not sell it for £60,000
My Sister in law bought a detached house on a new estate five years ago for £250,000......... now they are going for £160,000....
(In the north of England)
Never assume anything where houses are concerned.....
Not read all posts so this may be a repeat
What we did is both put 50% of our take home pay in a joint account, this then goes in shopping mortgage bills etc. this then means that you are both paying a percentage of everything fairly.
With a bird I have seen lots of mates moving in with em and the women insisting that they have the latest carpets TV sofas kitchen ware bedding etc, before a lot of people know it they are up to their eyes in tick for the next couple of nears and get trapped, you don't need fancy stuff you can't afford, it's just nice to have
What we did is both put 50% of our take home pay in a joint account, this then goes in shopping mortgage bills etc. this then means that you are both paying a percentage of everything fairly.
With a bird I have seen lots of mates moving in with em and the women insisting that they have the latest carpets TV sofas kitchen ware bedding etc, before a lot of people know it they are up to their eyes in tick for the next couple of nears and get trapped, you don't need fancy stuff you can't afford, it's just nice to have
lel said:
yeah i would never get paid into a joint account, i wouldn't trust anyone with my money.
We don't control each others money but i have advised her to cut back on the spending a bit until she can match what i am saving each month. I don't think im being unreasonable by asking that, am i? We are meant to be doing this together so our savings should be 50/50 in my eyes. She does earn more than me to be fair and doesn't have a car to pay for.
My suggestion didn't go down too well.
So you're already disagreeing about spending and you haven't even moved in. I think you should rent until you both get a better hold on budgeting and saving. Buying now would be a massive mistake IMHO.We don't control each others money but i have advised her to cut back on the spending a bit until she can match what i am saving each month. I don't think im being unreasonable by asking that, am i? We are meant to be doing this together so our savings should be 50/50 in my eyes. She does earn more than me to be fair and doesn't have a car to pay for.
My suggestion didn't go down too well.
You also sound very resentful of her financial management. May I suggest that either you wind your neck in and accept it without complaining or ensure that you have ironed this stuff out before moving in together. Otherwise, your relationship will not last long if you continue to snipe at her without actually sitting down with her to agree the financial arrangements.
Silver said:
lel said:
yeah i would never get paid into a joint account, i wouldn't trust anyone with my money.
We don't control each others money but i have advised her to cut back on the spending a bit until she can match what i am saving each month. I don't think im being unreasonable by asking that, am i? We are meant to be doing this together so our savings should be 50/50 in my eyes. She does earn more than me to be fair and doesn't have a car to pay for.
My suggestion didn't go down too well.
So you're already disagreeing about spending and you haven't even moved in. I think you should rent until you both get a better hold on budgeting and saving. Buying now would be a massive mistake IMHO.We don't control each others money but i have advised her to cut back on the spending a bit until she can match what i am saving each month. I don't think im being unreasonable by asking that, am i? We are meant to be doing this together so our savings should be 50/50 in my eyes. She does earn more than me to be fair and doesn't have a car to pay for.
My suggestion didn't go down too well.
You also sound very resentful of her financial management. May I suggest that either you wind your neck in and accept it without complaining or ensure that you have ironed this stuff out before moving in together. Otherwise, your relationship will not last long if you continue to snipe at her without actually sitting down with her to agree the financial arrangements.
You know what's useful for credit score? Wonga.
Borrow £50 for one day and pay it back. Do this once a month for 9 months and watch your credit score rocket. It'll cost you £5/time.
Credit scores are bulls
t. A few years ago, I was earning a fat wedge and was in a job from which I couldn't be sacked (well, not quickly, at least). Problem was, I moved a lot, so I had a dozen or so addresses on my file all within about 18 months of each other (although sometimes it was as simple as leaving out one element of the name of my office, resulting in another "new" address). Accordingly, my score was in the toilet. I couldn't get a loan of £5 for lunch, let alone a credit card or anything else. It was only once I had the chance to apply for a savings account and actually speak to a human being that I was able to show them that my income was considerable and I wasn't the dole scum that my computerised history would seem to suggest.*
On another note, is she really the one you want to buy a house with? No reason to suspect she's not, just a question worth asking yourself, since I can imagine it gets overlooked.
Simon.
Borrow £50 for one day and pay it back. Do this once a month for 9 months and watch your credit score rocket. It'll cost you £5/time.
Credit scores are bulls
t. A few years ago, I was earning a fat wedge and was in a job from which I couldn't be sacked (well, not quickly, at least). Problem was, I moved a lot, so I had a dozen or so addresses on my file all within about 18 months of each other (although sometimes it was as simple as leaving out one element of the name of my office, resulting in another "new" address). Accordingly, my score was in the toilet. I couldn't get a loan of £5 for lunch, let alone a credit card or anything else. It was only once I had the chance to apply for a savings account and actually speak to a human being that I was able to show them that my income was considerable and I wasn't the dole scum that my computerised history would seem to suggest.*On another note, is she really the one you want to buy a house with? No reason to suspect she's not, just a question worth asking yourself, since I can imagine it gets overlooked.
Simon.
- yes, yes, considerably richer than yow etc.
She's nagging you about not saving at all, and you're nagging her about not saving enough? Your whole opening post tone sounds worn out and fed up before you've even started.
I echo all the other comments here about renting together first before buying. I also wouldn't bother with a joint savings account. If you're both saving towards the same goal then perhaps at the end of the month you should both get a paper statement from your individual savings accounts so you can both see how you're doing.
I'm not living with my boyfriend but we have discussed how we would arrange things should the situation come up in the future (dating less than 2 years) and as far as I can recall that was a pretty calm discussion where we both compared what we have saved so far and worked out what we'd do with regards to joint accounts for rent and bills etc etc. A neither point did either of us start arguing over who was saving more or less than the other or who was spending too much money.
If you can't even get through basic discussions like this without bhing and sniping at each other then you do NOT want to be buying a house together. Rent for a year, and if both of you can stand the sight of each other after that then maybe start looking at buying.
I echo all the other comments here about renting together first before buying. I also wouldn't bother with a joint savings account. If you're both saving towards the same goal then perhaps at the end of the month you should both get a paper statement from your individual savings accounts so you can both see how you're doing.
I'm not living with my boyfriend but we have discussed how we would arrange things should the situation come up in the future (dating less than 2 years) and as far as I can recall that was a pretty calm discussion where we both compared what we have saved so far and worked out what we'd do with regards to joint accounts for rent and bills etc etc. A neither point did either of us start arguing over who was saving more or less than the other or who was spending too much money.
If you can't even get through basic discussions like this without b
hing and sniping at each other then you do NOT want to be buying a house together. Rent for a year, and if both of you can stand the sight of each other after that then maybe start looking at buying.some helpful and honest advice here and i appreciate it.
There has been no arguing between us, i think that has been blown out of proportion slightly, a few little hiccups and niggles most of which comes down to lack of knowledge on the subject. We have been together nearly 6 years now and are happy, hence the reason for wanting to move to the next step.
There has been no arguing between us, i think that has been blown out of proportion slightly, a few little hiccups and niggles most of which comes down to lack of knowledge on the subject. We have been together nearly 6 years now and are happy, hence the reason for wanting to move to the next step.
lel said:
Before i go into this I'm not massively clued up with credit scores, mortgages or anything like that so if i'm wrong about anything then a bit of help would be appreciated
Me and my girlfriend are planning to get our first home, we both understand it is not going to be cheap or easy. I have just came out of my time as an apprentice and i am now earning a good wage, she has been working full time for 2 years and earns a good wage too. However, i get paid cash in hand weekly which means i very rarely use my bank, i have never borrowed money and i have no credit score what so ever which will be a problem when looking for a mortgage. She has no history of borrowing either.
I suggested getting a credit card to use for internet purchases and put the cash to one side and pay it off monthly, would this help the credit situation at all? She thinks its a stupid idea (but she's now looking at a credit card too?!
)
Cue argument about how she thinks getting paid cash is stupid as apparently i dont know what money i've got, i can count so thats all made up nonsense. She also thinks i don't save and wants to set up a joint savings account to prove i do which i'm a bit unsure about. I don't drink, i don't smoke and as boring as it sounds the only thing i have that takes my money is my car (its cost me £40 in the last 3 months, go figure) And i've managed to save just as much in 3 weeks as she has in 2 years but as usual i'm the bad one and i don't have a clue about saving and blah blah blah. /rant
In short i want advice on building a credit score, how to deal with a woman that thinks she has encyclopedic knowledge on anything and everything and information on general money saving, borrowing and house buying.
Spend every day for a month reading this website, until you know it back to front and word for word.Me and my girlfriend are planning to get our first home, we both understand it is not going to be cheap or easy. I have just came out of my time as an apprentice and i am now earning a good wage, she has been working full time for 2 years and earns a good wage too. However, i get paid cash in hand weekly which means i very rarely use my bank, i have never borrowed money and i have no credit score what so ever which will be a problem when looking for a mortgage. She has no history of borrowing either.
I suggested getting a credit card to use for internet purchases and put the cash to one side and pay it off monthly, would this help the credit situation at all? She thinks its a stupid idea (but she's now looking at a credit card too?!
) Cue argument about how she thinks getting paid cash is stupid as apparently i dont know what money i've got, i can count so thats all made up nonsense. She also thinks i don't save and wants to set up a joint savings account to prove i do which i'm a bit unsure about. I don't drink, i don't smoke and as boring as it sounds the only thing i have that takes my money is my car (its cost me £40 in the last 3 months, go figure) And i've managed to save just as much in 3 weeks as she has in 2 years but as usual i'm the bad one and i don't have a clue about saving and blah blah blah. /rant
In short i want advice on building a credit score, how to deal with a woman that thinks she has encyclopedic knowledge on anything and everything and information on general money saving, borrowing and house buying.
This should be your financial bible from now until retirement:
www.moneysavingexpert.com
Its not your lack of credit history that's a problem - its that you and your GF don't see eye to eye on finances before you move in.
She can't save, spends a lot and she wants a)a joint savings acct and b)to dictate to you. Don't live together.
Women can spend money in an empty room - it starts now.
She can't save, spends a lot and she wants a)a joint savings acct and b)to dictate to you. Don't live together.
Women can spend money in an empty room - it starts now.
lel said:
yeah i would never get paid into a joint account, i wouldn't trust anyone with my money.
.
I think you're going to have a problem.... If you don't trust anyone with your money, then entering into a joint mortgage is a disaster. If you have a joint account and the other party takes advantage, it's a quick and easy fix. Owing the bank a huge amount of money and failing to honour the repayments is a whole different ball game. .
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