Baby Costs - !!!!!
Discussion
Lotus82 said:
Quickly realising there is an us Vs them mentality forming in this post. That was not my intention at all an do wish ill on anyone, was just looking for advice.
I don't think its like that but only on PH could you get people on 100k+ who "struggle"I know a lot of people (myself included) who earn way less and manage just fine.
DoubleSix said:
Lotus82 said:
DoubleSix said:
rich12 said:
You have a joint income of £110k and you are worrying how to survive with twins???
Spend less??
tSpend less??
tish answer there rich12, well done.OP I feel your pain. Despite having higher income and less kids childcare is ruinous, and I have found it difficult.
Shame your employer doesnt do tax vouchers. I only qualify for the minimum but it helps me feel less sore.
Some people are lucky enough to have family that can do one day a week, is that an option?
Ultimately we have just had to change our lifestyle a lot. The flash cars have gone, paid down debt, and hammered down the outgoings on food especially. It's not fun when you are used to lifes fineries but I derive my pleasure from other things these days and perspective has shifted as a result.
It does get gradually easier but there's no doubting the 'squeezed middle' is a tough place right now.
Kids are worth it though eh?
I feel like I am being targeted. If we both earned £49,999 a year we would get £'000's in handouts, however we don't and for a period during maternity we will go 3 months on my wage alone - that will be no fun at all.
Well the Lotus went before the twins arrived and I run a Fiat Panda! Sky went and costs are analysed to make sure we're not being daft.
Whoever spends £1,500 on food a month ..... hahahaha legend. What are you eating? Steaks for breakfast and dinner?
Is your Mrs on board? Mine is a trooper and worked out early on that working full time was pointless. She works 3 days a week now as that was optimum and still gets the kid mixing with others.
In addition, she gets nappies and the baby crap from low cost outlets. She cooks from scratch for the kids and ourselves. And she certainly didnt have three months off!
I have an image of you doing the blue arse routine whilst Mrs Lotus82 does what she always did. Only because I have seen so many examples of this elsewhere amongst our friends and family etc
I guess we will just need to apply further measures to the budget and lifestyle.
rich12 said:
OP, as you say you will have to just suck it up for a few years. Personally, I would get your wife to stop work (if she was ok with that) or part time. The twins can still be with other kids and go to classes/clubs etc but working full time just to pay for childcare is insane IMO.
Great point. We need to engage with her employer and see if they would be flexible but her staying at home and going to classes would work - she loves them during maternity OP I feel you pain, we have the same difficulties, only one child but less income.
The ways we saved:
Used a childminder not expensive childcare (and ignoring the costs we are so much happier!)
Asked in laws to loo
In laws provide childcare one day a week
Sold all the toys and paid off as much debt as possible before the kids came along
Don't take major holidays - max £1000 per year
Don't buy clothing
Most importantly don't buy any new baby kit- the only brand new thing we bought was a new child seat for the car on safety grounds! We saved thousands buying secondhand and two years in feel very smug about it- we lost NOTHING.
You have to retbase your expectations and your lifestyle, you don't get to go out or enjoy life for three years, you'll have to enjoy your kids
Living like this we are still saving £800 per month (to go on a house deposit) and paying off £450 per month in student loans.
It gets a bit easier at three years because you start to get child support for free childcare.
The ways we saved:
Used a childminder not expensive childcare (and ignoring the costs we are so much happier!)
Asked in laws to loo
In laws provide childcare one day a week
Sold all the toys and paid off as much debt as possible before the kids came along
Don't take major holidays - max £1000 per year
Don't buy clothing
Most importantly don't buy any new baby kit- the only brand new thing we bought was a new child seat for the car on safety grounds! We saved thousands buying secondhand and two years in feel very smug about it- we lost NOTHING.
You have to retbase your expectations and your lifestyle, you don't get to go out or enjoy life for three years, you'll have to enjoy your kids
Living like this we are still saving £800 per month (to go on a house deposit) and paying off £450 per month in student loans.
It gets a bit easier at three years because you start to get child support for free childcare.
ClaphamGT3 said:
I think some people should chill out and realise that the OP asked for constructive advice on how to make his money go further.......
Perfectly chilled but he simply has to spend less. Realise that kids require some sacrifice and adjust your expectations and outgoings accordingly. If the OP really does drive a cheap drive, take no holidays and shop at Aldi then he must have other outgoings that sap his money.
I'd love a Ferrari but guess what? I can't afford one so I don't have one. I'm realistic as to how far my wages will stretch.
Lots of people make more or less, lots of people have more or fewer kids, etc.
OP, I think your missus needs to consider possibly not taking the full year off, and possibly changing her hours quite significantly.
My partner works 5 days a week still, but does 5 hours a day in the office and then works from home in the afternoons. That means full time pay but part time childcare costs.
I also work from home when I'm not travelling, so at least this means we can share some of that afternoon load.
Could either of you work from home, even one day a week?
And are you looking at nursery or childminder? We found nurseries expensive and inflexible, whereas childminders are less expensive (marginally) but much more flexible.
Our childminder also takes the kids to various toddler groups and music play groups and for days out to country parks and so on, so the children still get fantastic experiences and interaction with other groups of adults and kids - I'd say more so than in a nursery environment.
Hope that gives you something to think about at least.
For what it's worth we make do on £60k a year and get £80 a month in child benefit for 1 child.
OP, I think your missus needs to consider possibly not taking the full year off, and possibly changing her hours quite significantly.
My partner works 5 days a week still, but does 5 hours a day in the office and then works from home in the afternoons. That means full time pay but part time childcare costs.
I also work from home when I'm not travelling, so at least this means we can share some of that afternoon load.
Could either of you work from home, even one day a week?
And are you looking at nursery or childminder? We found nurseries expensive and inflexible, whereas childminders are less expensive (marginally) but much more flexible.
Our childminder also takes the kids to various toddler groups and music play groups and for days out to country parks and so on, so the children still get fantastic experiences and interaction with other groups of adults and kids - I'd say more so than in a nursery environment.
Hope that gives you something to think about at least.
For what it's worth we make do on £60k a year and get £80 a month in child benefit for 1 child.
DoubleSix said:
Dont bother answering this stuff.
I earn 150k+ and still dont have money to throw around. Some people will never appreciate the fixed costs element.
I fully appreciate that expenditure rises with income, and %wise a lot of people's costs will be similar - x% of pay on mortgage etc.I earn 150k+ and still dont have money to throw around. Some people will never appreciate the fixed costs element.
However, those costs don't have to be so high. The OP (and yourself) earn what the majority of this country can only dream of. You have clearly done well for yourselves, and hats off to you for doing so, but surely you can see how this comes across when you claim to be too poor to go on holiday and can't afford £20 a month for sky TV?
DuraAce said:
Lotus82 said:
Quickly realising there is an us Vs them mentality forming in this post. That was not my intention at all an do wish ill on anyone, was just looking for advice.
I don't think its like that but only on PH could you get people on 100k+ who "struggle"I know a lot of people (myself included) who earn way less and manage just fine.
ClaphamGT3 said:
The other thing to think about is that, when on maternity leave, Mrs C saved us the best part of £10k a year by looking at all our energy tariffs/insurances/memberships etc that I'd never really thought about on a 'life's too short' basis
Conversely, my gas/electric went from 50 to 100 a month as the girlfriend is home all day whilst on mat leave over winter!Thankfully its getting sunny now!
Part time working may be the best move. My other half works 2 days a week, and we manage child care between my shift pattern and a bit of help from grandparents.
If she worked an extra day we'd have to pay nursery fees which would be the same amount as her extra days' pay.
If she worked an extra day we'd have to pay nursery fees which would be the same amount as her extra days' pay.
Edited by SteveScooby on Sunday 29th March 10:07
Can you let is know what your typical outgoings are per month and then we might be able to suggest some parts that can be cut back.
If for example, it's you biggest expense, Could you rent out your current house and downsize/move to a cheaper area to save some pennies?
I'd like to live in st Katherine's dock to be nice and convenient for work, but my budget stretches to Harlow and allows for a holiday fund! It's all compromises, some of which you can accept, some you can't.
If for example, it's you biggest expense, Could you rent out your current house and downsize/move to a cheaper area to save some pennies?
I'd like to live in st Katherine's dock to be nice and convenient for work, but my budget stretches to Harlow and allows for a holiday fund! It's all compromises, some of which you can accept, some you can't.
Lotus82 said:
rich12 said:
OP, as you say you will have to just suck it up for a few years. Personally, I would get your wife to stop work (if she was ok with that) or part time. The twins can still be with other kids and go to classes/clubs etc but working full time just to pay for childcare is insane IMO.
Great point. We need to engage with her employer and see if they would be flexible but her staying at home and going to classes would work - she loves them during maternity She needs to pack up work, or at least do as little as possible to keep her hand in, at least until the twins start pre-school.
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