A petty parking issue
Discussion
CerberusRogue said:
urinate on his door handle. I'm sure that I read on this very forum an epic tale of anti-Porscheness, where I was regaled with a fine story of epic revenge. Shame, the thread seems to have disappeared.... 
For best results, there needs to be dehydration, a white car and a frosty night.Whilst it is annoying, you have no more right to park outside your house on a public road than he has. It does seem strange though.
Don't do anything to his car, it will be pretty obvious who has done it.
If all else fails, frozen sausages are the PH time honoured way, but if he doesn't have a front lawn I'm afraid you're f
ked.
Don't do anything to his car, it will be pretty obvious who has done it.
If all else fails, frozen sausages are the PH time honoured way, but if he doesn't have a front lawn I'm afraid you're f
ked.Put stuff in the exhaust pipe so it goes bang
Steal his wheels
Plant flowers in the water tray in front of the windscreen
Cover it in grass clippings
Cover it in bird seed
Practice abstract painting on the side
Have pizzas delivered to his house
Toilet paper his car / house - pay local scabby children to do it
Leave annoying and pointless notes on his car
Put a cone in front of his car
Cable Tie empty cans to the back of his car
Steal his wheels
Plant flowers in the water tray in front of the windscreen
Cover it in grass clippings
Cover it in bird seed
Practice abstract painting on the side
Have pizzas delivered to his house
Toilet paper his car / house - pay local scabby children to do it
Leave annoying and pointless notes on his car
Put a cone in front of his car
Cable Tie empty cans to the back of his car
Edited by ashleyman on Thursday 26th May 18:18
BlackZeD said:
Middle of the night whip his rear numberplate off, stick on the back of a mates car.
Not yours and go and blam through some speed cameras.
Whizz back and put the plate back on.
If the cars the same/similar type he will have a hell of a job explaining it away.
Just nick his plates.Not yours and go and blam through some speed cameras.
Whizz back and put the plate back on.
If the cars the same/similar type he will have a hell of a job explaining it away.
When you see him looking at the empty plate holders, urge him to report it to plod as the thieves will surely be doing drive offs ram raids and acts of terrorism with his plates.
He reports it,replaces the plates and then will get stopped by plod every single time an ANPR clocks him.
Just park outside his house.
Life's too short.
I understand your pain. I have allocated parking in a flat, the new neighbour decided his space was a bit tighter than he wanted it to be, so either parked across both his and my spaces or boxed me in if I parked in mine. He was an arse for some time, and made my life diffucult, he was ultimately called out by the other flat owners after he told a few very obvious lies in the management meeting.
Life's too short.
I understand your pain. I have allocated parking in a flat, the new neighbour decided his space was a bit tighter than he wanted it to be, so either parked across both his and my spaces or boxed me in if I parked in mine. He was an arse for some time, and made my life diffucult, he was ultimately called out by the other flat owners after he told a few very obvious lies in the management meeting.
Dare I say it, be the bigger man and try and just accept it? It's a damn car.
Could be worse, our neighbour has a bright yellow (!!) LWB transit battered to hell who parks opposite us. We even have a bit of a nice green area it blocks,unfortunately the widest part or the road is opposite us, so it's an ideal place for him.
Could be worse, our neighbour has a bright yellow (!!) LWB transit battered to hell who parks opposite us. We even have a bit of a nice green area it blocks,unfortunately the widest part or the road is opposite us, so it's an ideal place for him.
Middle of the night. Large syringe. Brake fluid. Exhaust. Repeat every few weeks.
He will be pulling his hair out whilst whatever garage he uses will be rubbing their hands together.
Very hard for anyone to prove it's up there without dismantling the back box and it doesn't do any lasting damage.
He will be pulling his hair out whilst whatever garage he uses will be rubbing their hands together.
Very hard for anyone to prove it's up there without dismantling the back box and it doesn't do any lasting damage.
Had the same issue a number of years ago. Would not have minded that much, but I was doing house renovations at the time and it was a right pain getting stuff around the offending vehicle and through my front gate. Left a very polite note explaining the situation and was rewarded with a return very rude note saying it was a public road and he would park wherever he f**king well pleased.
I responded with a, once again, very polite note explaining that I appreciated that fact and that I would do my level best to avoid hitting his car with bits of timber/scaffold poles/drywall etc., etc. and, if I should accidently put a slight ding or scratch in his car I hoped he would forgive me.
He obviously decided to not chance it and moved to parking around the corner.
I responded with a, once again, very polite note explaining that I appreciated that fact and that I would do my level best to avoid hitting his car with bits of timber/scaffold poles/drywall etc., etc. and, if I should accidently put a slight ding or scratch in his car I hoped he would forgive me.
He obviously decided to not chance it and moved to parking around the corner.
Turkish91 said:
Middle of the night. Large syringe. Brake fluid. Exhaust. Repeat every few weeks.
He will be pulling his hair out whilst whatever garage he uses will be rubbing their hands together.
Very hard for anyone to prove it's up there without dismantling the back box and it doesn't do any lasting damage.
I'm totally going to do this to the person who parks his car next to the do not park sign in my flats car park!! He already has to fill up his car with water before every use so this will just make him even more annoyed about his car!He will be pulling his hair out whilst whatever garage he uses will be rubbing their hands together.
Very hard for anyone to prove it's up there without dismantling the back box and it doesn't do any lasting damage.
ashleyman said:
Put stuff in the exhaust pipe so it goes bang
Steal his wheels
Plant flowers in the water tray in front of the windscreen
Cover it in grass clippings
Cover it in bird seed
Practice abstract painting on the side
Have pizzas delivered to his house
Toilet paper his car / house - pay local scabby children to do it
Leave annoying and pointless notes on his car
Put a cone in front of his car
Cable Tie empty cans to the back of his car
Please don't do the pizza one as your costing other people money and time.Steal his wheels
Plant flowers in the water tray in front of the windscreen
Cover it in grass clippings
Cover it in bird seed
Practice abstract painting on the side
Have pizzas delivered to his house
Toilet paper his car / house - pay local scabby children to do it
Leave annoying and pointless notes on his car
Put a cone in front of his car
Cable Tie empty cans to the back of his car
Edited by ashleyman on Thursday 26th May 18:18
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