Cat doesn't love us any more...
Discussion
Absolutely fuming!
This saga is still dragging on unfortunately, we only really see the ginger cat once a month or so if that.
Today at the school gates during drop off my partner was confronted by the "new owner" of ginger who was a little apologetic, stating they thought he was a stray and they were worried about him, they started feeding him and then he's never really left. She also hadn't checked to see if he had a chip and she has essentially encouraged him to abandon his owners! My children are also very upset as she spoke to my partner with my children present. My partner was obviously annoyed and informed her about the etiquette of not stealing a neighbours cat etc.
Where do I go from here? I want our cat back but I don't think that will happen and also it might be a bit cruel on Ginger! Where would I stand dropping her an invoice for the past 12 months of insurance, neutering, flea and worming treatments? All of which I have receipts for as we purchased all of this when we first got him, as a rough estimate about £150 in total.
This saga is still dragging on unfortunately, we only really see the ginger cat once a month or so if that.
Today at the school gates during drop off my partner was confronted by the "new owner" of ginger who was a little apologetic, stating they thought he was a stray and they were worried about him, they started feeding him and then he's never really left. She also hadn't checked to see if he had a chip and she has essentially encouraged him to abandon his owners! My children are also very upset as she spoke to my partner with my children present. My partner was obviously annoyed and informed her about the etiquette of not stealing a neighbours cat etc.
Where do I go from here? I want our cat back but I don't think that will happen and also it might be a bit cruel on Ginger! Where would I stand dropping her an invoice for the past 12 months of insurance, neutering, flea and worming treatments? All of which I have receipts for as we purchased all of this when we first got him, as a rough estimate about £150 in total.
Get him back shut him in for 6 weeks, tell lady not to have ANYMORE contact and as you are the one who paid to have him chipped and it is in your name, no one can argue that it is your cat.
In this day and age I don't buy the excuse re: being a stray if they haven't had the cat checked for a chip.
If after all that he refuses to settle back with you then maybe you have to consider his wishes but until this other person is denied time with him you just won't know.
Also because Ginger is chipped you have proof of ownership over his 'new' owners.
If it were me I'd have him back and at least try.
My parents took on a neighbours cat once but only after discussing it with them first.
In this day and age I don't buy the excuse re: being a stray if they haven't had the cat checked for a chip.
If after all that he refuses to settle back with you then maybe you have to consider his wishes but until this other person is denied time with him you just won't know.
Also because Ginger is chipped you have proof of ownership over his 'new' owners.
If it were me I'd have him back and at least try.
My parents took on a neighbours cat once but only after discussing it with them first.
Edited by bexVN on Thursday 22 January 11:44
Chocolate Teapot said:
She also hadn't checked to see if he had a chip and she has essentially encouraged him to abandon his owners!
Did she also say she didn't bother to check the collar she removed as well? I'd report her to the RSPCA who tend to mither at people who do this. Maybe consider telling her if the collar goes missing again you'll be reporting it as stolen?Keep him inside for at least 6 weeks and establish a morning feed pattern with him, so that you can feed him before he's let out which will reduce the chances of someone stealing him by feeding him. Cats are very fickle creatures, but they are also definitely good at keeping habits if kept happy.
Is a cat a posession? As the cat was a stray and is obviously a bit of a wanderer, I'd let it live with whoever it wants to live with the most. If it wants to live with Mrs Miggins down the road and not you, what rights have you really got? I say let the cat be happy and if you're not the winner, get another one 
We had an elderly neighbour that used to encourage our cat in & feed it, it took us a while to work out where it was disappearing too. We ended up knocking on her door quite a number of times for the sherry addled old bint to deny having the cat, then let her out the back door when she thought we'd gone. It didn't bother her one bit that our kids went to bed in tears on many occasions because they hadn't seen their cat that day.
It ended up in a blazing row between her & my OH & I stepped in offering to let her adopt the cat, we'd inform the Vet & cancel the insurance etc but the canny old bint wasn't having any of that was she! We also told her the cat had fleas (it didn't) hoping that would stop her letting it in.
She ended up adopting a 'stray' cat that beats the crap out of the other cat we rescued
Best bit is, the old bint passed away last year but we'd had to re-home the cat as it rarely came home. The bloody 'stray' she adopted still lives with her widowed husband & her son so our poor little cat still gets bullied.
It ended up in a blazing row between her & my OH & I stepped in offering to let her adopt the cat, we'd inform the Vet & cancel the insurance etc but the canny old bint wasn't having any of that was she! We also told her the cat had fleas (it didn't) hoping that would stop her letting it in.
She ended up adopting a 'stray' cat that beats the crap out of the other cat we rescued
Best bit is, the old bint passed away last year but we'd had to re-home the cat as it rarely came home. The bloody 'stray' she adopted still lives with her widowed husband & her son so our poor little cat still gets bullied.
Simpo Two said:
Is a cat a posession? As the cat was a stray and is obviously a bit of a wanderer, I'd let it live with whoever it wants to live with the most. If it wants to live with Mrs Miggins down the road and not you, what rights have you really got? I say let the cat be happy and if you're not the winner, get another one
Well the rights are in this case that the OP has currently paid for the care to this cat, I do agree if the cat genuinely isn't happy there then ownership should be changed but properly, however they should have the chance to try and reintegrate the cat esp as he is still visiting them. If that fails then it probably is time to let go.Chocolate Teapot said:
Where do I go from here? I want our cat back but I don't think that will happen and also it might be a bit cruel on Ginger! Where would I stand dropping her an invoice for the past 12 months of insurance, neutering, flea and worming treatments? All of which I have receipts for as we purchased all of this when we first got him, as a rough estimate about £150 in total.
You should definitely do this. The Daily Mail will love you for it after that party invoice story went viral, this would be a lovely follow up 
You pinched the cat from someone else in the first place, I think you need to accept he's prone to wandering. Tell the other woman to stop feeding it, but its only going to be a matter of time till it happens again.
Why not get a dog, they're way more loyal.
bexVN said:
Well the rights are in this case that the OP has currently paid for the care to this cat, I do agree if the cat genuinely isn't happy there then ownership should be changed but properly, however they should have the chance to try and reintegrate the cat esp as he is still visiting them. If that fails then it probably is time to let go.
Surely there's no law against the other woman putting cat food out on her own property, is there?If the OP doesn't want his cat going there, then keep the cat in the house!
I just don't understand this cat owner logic that says it's perfectly acceptable to let your nasty little animal out to crap in other people's gardens, but then get in a strop when said nasty little animal decides to stay there! You let it out, so either keep it in or stop whining about it!
If I lived near the OP, I'd be delighted if his "cat thief" went the whole hog and kept his cat at her house all the time. It would be one less cat leaving turds in my garden!
Kermit power said:
Surely there's no law against the other woman putting cat food out on her own property, is there?
If the OP doesn't want his cat going there, then keep the cat in the house!
I just don't understand this cat owner logic that says it's perfectly acceptable to let your nasty little animal out to crap in other people's gardens, but then get in a strop when said nasty little animal decides to stay there! You let it out, so either keep it in or stop whining about it!
If I lived near the OP, I'd be delighted if his "cat thief" went the whole hog and kept his cat at her house all the time. It would be one less cat leaving turds in my garden!
You're in the wrong sub forum for this sort of sensible logic.If the OP doesn't want his cat going there, then keep the cat in the house!
I just don't understand this cat owner logic that says it's perfectly acceptable to let your nasty little animal out to crap in other people's gardens, but then get in a strop when said nasty little animal decides to stay there! You let it out, so either keep it in or stop whining about it!
If I lived near the OP, I'd be delighted if his "cat thief" went the whole hog and kept his cat at her house all the time. It would be one less cat leaving turds in my garden!
bexVN said:
Get him back shut him in for 6 weeks, tell lady not to have ANYMORE contact and as you are the one who paid to have him chipped and it is in your name, no one can argue that it is your cat.
In this day and age I don't buy the excuse re: being a stray if they haven't had the cat checked for a chip.
If after all that he refuses to settle back with you then maybe you have to consider his wishes but until this other person is denied time with him you just won't know.
Also because Ginger is chipped you have proof of ownership over his 'new' owners.
If it were me I'd have him back and at least try.
This In this day and age I don't buy the excuse re: being a stray if they haven't had the cat checked for a chip.
If after all that he refuses to settle back with you then maybe you have to consider his wishes but until this other person is denied time with him you just won't know.
Also because Ginger is chipped you have proof of ownership over his 'new' owners.
If it were me I'd have him back and at least try.
I do feel sorry for you, but this independence is why I like cats so much.
I remember delivering Christmas cards a few years ago. I delivered one to the elderly lady at the end of the road. When she opened the door Oscar (our cat) was curled up asleep on a chair in her lounge in front of the fire - "his chair" apparently.
The lady said "he's so fussy - he only eats fresh meat and fish, no tinned or dry stuff at all"
He was still eating good portions of any old rubbish twice a day at home. Good on him though. He'd found his daytime home and was onto a very good thing indeed!
I remember delivering Christmas cards a few years ago. I delivered one to the elderly lady at the end of the road. When she opened the door Oscar (our cat) was curled up asleep on a chair in her lounge in front of the fire - "his chair" apparently.
The lady said "he's so fussy - he only eats fresh meat and fish, no tinned or dry stuff at all"
He was still eating good portions of any old rubbish twice a day at home. Good on him though. He'd found his daytime home and was onto a very good thing indeed!
otolith said:
I wonder how many old ladies he's been tarting himself round - he's probably got a circuit!
Yeah. Our old cat spent most days on the lap of the lady next door. Do what my brother in law does. Cats are fed in the open(ish) makeshift lean to, (where the spare freezer, the beer fridge and the second washing machine live), they both have a bed in a cat carrier, if they want it, and are not allowed in the house unless it's below 5 degrees outside. Cats don't love him, so cats get the basics and if someone else wants to feed them or adopt them then that's fine by him.
Pit Pony said:
Do what my brother in law does. Cats are fed in the open(ish) makeshift lean to, (where the spare freezer, the beer fridge and the second washing machine live), they both have a bed in a cat carrier, if they want it, and are not allowed in the house unless it's below 5 degrees outside. Cats don't love him, so cats get the basics and if someone else wants to feed them or adopt them then that's fine by him.
Why does he have cats? 
I find cats will always go to the best home they can find.
If this cat is spending one day a month at yours and the rest of the month somewhere else, and isn't locked in for the rest of the month, 'somewhere else' is providing a better home than you are.
Maybe it likes a quiet home, or maybe it doesn't like being fussed over by your kids?
But it's the cats choice.
If this cat is spending one day a month at yours and the rest of the month somewhere else, and isn't locked in for the rest of the month, 'somewhere else' is providing a better home than you are.
Maybe it likes a quiet home, or maybe it doesn't like being fussed over by your kids?
But it's the cats choice.
Chocolate Teapot said:
Now what has really annoyed me is that today he has come home again after being missing for 2 days and his new collar is missing and somebody has put another collar on him!! what's that all about?
Seriously, have a guess what has happened. And no, it is nothing to do with the cat not liking the collar you bought.
And seriously again; you don't have a cat as a pet, the cat has you as a pet. Several of you usually. The manky critters will come to see you when they want food, or fuss, or somewhere dry to sleep for a while, then they'll be off to visit their other human pets.
otolith said:
You are both in the wrong thread for cat haters.
I don't hate cats. I hate other people's cats crapping in my garden. There's a difference.With particular regard to this thread, I have people letting their cats out to crap in other people's gardens and then having the nerve to whine when said cat decides to actually exercise the freedom it has been given.
Sorry, but "it's OK for my cat to crap in your garden, but it's not OK for it to sit on your sofa and eat your food" is a complete logic fail to me.
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