New cat - very anxious and hissy
Discussion
Hi - I've had cats for years, and was at the stage of having just one (Poppy). I've had Poppy since about 6 months old - she was an RSPCA rescue - and now she's about 3 years old. Poppy spends a lot of her time outside catching mice and running away from (getting beaten up by) the neighbouring big black cat, but she's friendly and I've never seen her be aggro with a person.
I've adopted a friend's cat (Dusty). Dusty was thrown off a balcony at 3 months old and adopted by my friend, where she spent her entire life inside his 2 bed flat in London. She's now 3 years old and more attached to him than I've ever seen a cat be - possibly because he "rescued" her and her circle of influence up until now has been pretty small due to being a house cat. He's emigrating and I have the cat at least until mid December, possibly longer, and if his plans change then maybe forever.
I'm going through the process of getting her spayed, chipped, jabbed etc. but understandably she's a bit freaked out.
She arrived on Wednesday and is calming down (sleeping in the open now rather than in "her" box) but she won't let me touch her at all without hissing, ears flat, and a bop and a little bite (going to the vet's this morning will be fun). She will take treats from my hand, and she's eating and using the litter tray fine. I have a Feliway diffuser in her room and I'm trying to desensitise her slowly.
Any tips or tricks?? I think I'm using cat common sense, but at some point I need to introduce her to my cat (maybe after a couple of weeks?), and let her have the run of the house rather than the one room she's shut in at the moment. I have let her out into the downstairs twice now (while Poppy is out) and she roams around gathering confidence.
As an aside, she's really thin, despite scoffing quite a lot of food! I'll be asking the vet to worm her today just in case !
Do you think a house cat would ever adjust to going outside? Would be nice to ditch the litter tray at some stage!
I've adopted a friend's cat (Dusty). Dusty was thrown off a balcony at 3 months old and adopted by my friend, where she spent her entire life inside his 2 bed flat in London. She's now 3 years old and more attached to him than I've ever seen a cat be - possibly because he "rescued" her and her circle of influence up until now has been pretty small due to being a house cat. He's emigrating and I have the cat at least until mid December, possibly longer, and if his plans change then maybe forever.
I'm going through the process of getting her spayed, chipped, jabbed etc. but understandably she's a bit freaked out.
She arrived on Wednesday and is calming down (sleeping in the open now rather than in "her" box) but she won't let me touch her at all without hissing, ears flat, and a bop and a little bite (going to the vet's this morning will be fun). She will take treats from my hand, and she's eating and using the litter tray fine. I have a Feliway diffuser in her room and I'm trying to desensitise her slowly.
Any tips or tricks?? I think I'm using cat common sense, but at some point I need to introduce her to my cat (maybe after a couple of weeks?), and let her have the run of the house rather than the one room she's shut in at the moment. I have let her out into the downstairs twice now (while Poppy is out) and she roams around gathering confidence.
As an aside, she's really thin, despite scoffing quite a lot of food! I'll be asking the vet to worm her today just in case !
Do you think a house cat would ever adjust to going outside? Would be nice to ditch the litter tray at some stage!
She's stressed 
Not only has she moved to a stange place, but she's living with an unknown cat and owner AND she's lost her beloved slave
Get some Zylkene that should be the right size for a cat, unless she's a small cat in which case get a smaller dose and some Kalmaid (1 squirt/day unless a small cat in which case a 1/2 squirt) and add one to wet food in the morning, the other to wet food in the evening.
My cats don't react to Feliway, but they do (very quickly) to Pet Remedy
I'd be giving it to Poppy too, as she will be stressed, there's another female in HER house and she's used to being bullied by other cats
Swap their bedding around as well eg if they both have radiator beds, put Poppy's in with Dusty & Dusty's where Poppy's usually is - only for a day or so later this week. It will help them get used to the smell of each other.
I'd also get a travel baby gate (mesh rather than bars) so they can sniff each other through it (they are less likely to jump over something to attack, it will be curiosity to meet each other that will drive that). Expect hissing and spitting, full on Halloween style arched backs & fluffy tails.
For the time being, you’ll need more litter trays (1 per cat +1 is the general rule), as Poppy may act up a little to mark her home out, and I’d wait until you know her Slave’s plans in December before making the decision over letting her out or not! It’s not long to wait and imagine if you let her out & something happened to her when he was coming home!!
As for getting her used to you; spend time in the room she’s in – take a book, or laptop & just sit there with treats around you/on you. Ignore her, let her come to you; she will
ETA did her slave sleep with her? Does Poppy sleep with you? If so, I'd spend the every other night in there with her.
Bex will be along later I'm sure with Pro advice.
* please note that suppliers other than Amazon are available, I use them because I had the links there for ease & my old supplier closed
Not only has she moved to a stange place, but she's living with an unknown cat and owner AND she's lost her beloved slave
Get some Zylkene that should be the right size for a cat, unless she's a small cat in which case get a smaller dose and some Kalmaid (1 squirt/day unless a small cat in which case a 1/2 squirt) and add one to wet food in the morning, the other to wet food in the evening.
My cats don't react to Feliway, but they do (very quickly) to Pet Remedy
I'd be giving it to Poppy too, as she will be stressed, there's another female in HER house and she's used to being bullied by other cats
Swap their bedding around as well eg if they both have radiator beds, put Poppy's in with Dusty & Dusty's where Poppy's usually is - only for a day or so later this week. It will help them get used to the smell of each other.
I'd also get a travel baby gate (mesh rather than bars) so they can sniff each other through it (they are less likely to jump over something to attack, it will be curiosity to meet each other that will drive that). Expect hissing and spitting, full on Halloween style arched backs & fluffy tails.
For the time being, you’ll need more litter trays (1 per cat +1 is the general rule), as Poppy may act up a little to mark her home out, and I’d wait until you know her Slave’s plans in December before making the decision over letting her out or not! It’s not long to wait and imagine if you let her out & something happened to her when he was coming home!!
As for getting her used to you; spend time in the room she’s in – take a book, or laptop & just sit there with treats around you/on you. Ignore her, let her come to you; she will
ETA did her slave sleep with her? Does Poppy sleep with you? If so, I'd spend the every other night in there with her.Bex will be along later I'm sure with Pro advice.
* please note that suppliers other than Amazon are available, I use them because I had the links there for ease & my old supplier closed
Edited by ali_kat on Monday 26th October 11:52
Thanks for the reply
It breaks your heart - I know how affectionate she is with her slave and she desperately looks like she needs a cuddle! Just want to explain to her it will all be ok!
Did make a bit of progress, although I've never known a cat like it; one minute she'll rub up against you and within a fraction of a second she's hissing at you. Now we are back at square minus one after the vet visit Almost couldn't get her in the basket - I've never had to scuff a cat but that wasn't even an option as couldn't get close enough. Ended up tricking her in as she hid in a box under a blanket, and gave her the open basket door as an escape route.
I can't easily sleep with her as she's in the office downstairs but I'll look at options as that may help, thank you
She is a small cat (2.6kg) so will look at the dosages for those and try them, good call. The vet wormed her yesterday too just in case, so will see what happens with her weight. She's certainly putting the food away and producing stuff in the litter tray !
Poppys been very good so far, just a bit miaowy and a bit clingy. There are two litter trays but Poppy will always go outside - just makes it tough Dusty being an indoor cat for a few weeks as it means I can't leave the kitchen door open for Poppy to come and go at will. All manageable though.
If I could handle Dusty it would be helpful - at the moment if I need to move her, there's no chance at all I can pick her up or shoo her somewhere, so I'm at a bit of a loss tbh. Just to get her back in her bedroom for example, so I can let Poppy back in. I will look at the stairgates, as if they can socialise it will help a lot!
Thank you again
It breaks your heart - I know how affectionate she is with her slave and she desperately looks like she needs a cuddle! Just want to explain to her it will all be ok!
Did make a bit of progress, although I've never known a cat like it; one minute she'll rub up against you and within a fraction of a second she's hissing at you. Now we are back at square minus one after the vet visit
Almost couldn't get her in the basket - I've never had to scuff a cat but that wasn't even an option as couldn't get close enough. Ended up tricking her in as she hid in a box under a blanket, and gave her the open basket door as an escape route.I can't easily sleep with her as she's in the office downstairs but I'll look at options as that may help, thank you
She is a small cat (2.6kg) so will look at the dosages for those and try them, good call. The vet wormed her yesterday too just in case, so will see what happens with her weight. She's certainly putting the food away and producing stuff in the litter tray !
Poppys been very good so far, just a bit miaowy and a bit clingy. There are two litter trays but Poppy will always go outside - just makes it tough Dusty being an indoor cat for a few weeks as it means I can't leave the kitchen door open for Poppy to come and go at will. All manageable though.
If I could handle Dusty it would be helpful - at the moment if I need to move her, there's no chance at all I can pick her up or shoo her somewhere, so I'm at a bit of a loss tbh. Just to get her back in her bedroom for example, so I can let Poppy back in. I will look at the stairgates, as if they can socialise it will help a lot!
Thank you again
No problem, with hindsight your mate really should have lived over with you & her for a day or 2 before leaving.She just needs time, I really would just sit in there with her, its very lonely being somewhere new, without your Slave, locked in a room, with strange noises & smells outside; its almost like being in prison... and she's done nothing wrong, she's just been left here, all alone...
I'm humanising, sorry. But she does need company.
My friend has just adopted a new cat after the loss of her girl to ill health. She just brought her home on Sunday & is letting them get on with it; not the way I'd recommend but then her boy is used to having a second cat around, and I have done it that way without problems before.
If neither are hissing at each other through the door; you could try letting them share the house space?
Yes, it is a PITA over the outside access, but if you cannot cope with it for the 6 weeks or so, change the cat flap to a microchip reader?
Don't stress, you open the Zyklene capsule & sprinkle it on the food
They are designed to be easy (& taste nice) so as not to stress the cat that needs destressing He did! Stayed a night and the next day. I'm wondering if she was ill treated by a woman in the past (she was a rescue) - she is happy to come out for cuddles if a bloke friend visits, but just hisses at me. She'll have a cuddle from me if the bloke is in the room but as soon as they've left we're back to hissing. Either that or she blames me for the absence of the slave !If I can get my cat introduced to her, then I can let her out of her room (although I honestly have no clue how to get her in her basket for the next vet visit). The flap is a microchip one but it only controls inbound cats, not outbound unfortunately.
I'll keep persevering and get the zylkene ordered ! Thanks again I'll let you know how she gets on!
She has a box with a t-shirt of his in it (she goes there when she needs to feel safe), and the cat basket has a blanket of his.
I suspect I'll start to make progress just as it's time for the next vet visit (spay!)
Introduced her through mesh to Poppy yesterday, then she got out of her room during the inght so i woke up to yowling and separated them for the night. Pops has been out all day but hoping to get them face to face today.
Poor little cat, I do feel for her!
I suspect I'll start to make progress just as it's time for the next vet visit (spay!)
Introduced her through mesh to Poppy yesterday, then she got out of her room during the inght so i woke up to yowling and separated them for the night. Pops has been out all day but hoping to get them face to face today.
Poor little cat, I do feel for her!
Slow is keyi think its very interesting how often specific animals react totally differently to different genders (some are famous for it like parrots i guess) and just to specific people for no obvious reason
there's a horse at our stables that will NOT tolerate a man near her to the point that the owner has had to learn to shoe her.
admittedly in this case it could be a combo of 'new place/person' anxiety AND 'this is another cats home at the moment' anxiety.....Im sure what Ali has said re: patience etc is spot on and all will be fine long term
Or you get a stage a cat cage fight. wins all round.
there's a horse at our stables that will NOT tolerate a man near her to the point that the owner has had to learn to shoe her.
admittedly in this case it could be a combo of 'new place/person' anxiety AND 'this is another cats home at the moment' anxiety.....Im sure what Ali has said re: patience etc is spot on and all will be fine long term
Or you get a stage a cat cage fight. wins all round.
Well making progress !
Poppy has got the arse a bit and is staying at the neighbours more than usual. Not helped by the fact I've been out and away all week (not back properly til Saturday night), but should be back to normal next week.
Dusty will now tolerate me, and even comes out for head nudges and strokes and has jumped up on my lap!!! I still get a love bite (i.e. not hard) when she's had enough - which is unpredictable - but I think she just gets a bit overloaded.
Of course we'll be back at square one after the vet visit next Friday !!!!
But phew. Things are moving in the right direction !
Poppy has got the arse a bit and is staying at the neighbours more than usual. Not helped by the fact I've been out and away all week (not back properly til Saturday night), but should be back to normal next week.
Dusty will now tolerate me, and even comes out for head nudges and strokes and has jumped up on my lap!!! I still get a love bite (i.e. not hard) when she's had enough - which is unpredictable - but I think she just gets a bit overloaded.
Of course we'll be back at square one after the vet visit next Friday !!!!
But phew. Things are moving in the right direction !
Dusty and I are getting on great, but same cannot be said for Dusty and Poppy. This morning fur flew - literally.
Dusty is locked in her room most of the time, except evenings or daytimes when I'm home and she can come out. I won't leave her and Poppy unsupervised. This morning there was a full on going for each other, fur flying, chasing around the house moment - Dusty gives as good as she gets !
Once she can go out, at least I can leave the cat flap unlocked so they can get some space from each other. It is a big house but they race around chasing each other so it feels small ! Fingers crossed they can settle down with each other although I am quite concerned.
Dusty is locked in her room most of the time, except evenings or daytimes when I'm home and she can come out. I won't leave her and Poppy unsupervised. This morning there was a full on going for each other, fur flying, chasing around the house moment - Dusty gives as good as she gets !
Once she can go out, at least I can leave the cat flap unlocked so they can get some space from each other. It is a big house but they race around chasing each other so it feels small ! Fingers crossed they can settle down with each other although I am quite concerned.
dreamer75 said:
Dusty and I are getting on great, but same cannot be said for Dusty and Poppy. This morning fur flew - literally.
Dusty is locked in her room most of the time, except evenings or daytimes when I'm home and she can come out. I won't leave her and Poppy unsupervised. This morning there was a full on going for each other, fur flying, chasing around the house moment - Dusty gives as good as she gets !
Once she can go out, at least I can leave the cat flap unlocked so they can get some space from each other. It is a big house but they race around chasing each other so it feels small ! Fingers crossed they can settle down with each other although I am quite concerned.
It's only been 3 weeks, it can take months for cats to get used to each other, especially when they are used to being the spoiled only 'child' Dusty is locked in her room most of the time, except evenings or daytimes when I'm home and she can come out. I won't leave her and Poppy unsupervised. This morning there was a full on going for each other, fur flying, chasing around the house moment - Dusty gives as good as she gets !
Once she can go out, at least I can leave the cat flap unlocked so they can get some space from each other. It is a big house but they race around chasing each other so it feels small ! Fingers crossed they can settle down with each other although I am quite concerned.
Fur flying is scary for us, but helps them sort out who is the 'boss' so they can then sort themselves out. They are very unlikely to do serious hurt or kill each other, although there may be injury from bites that need a Vet visit
Keeping them apart, swapping bedding & litter trays etc around so they continue to get used to each other's space; will all help - as will lots of fuss & supervised access visits. Lock Poppy in Dusty's room some days so they can acclimatise as well.
I took that as a given!Thanks Ali! Poppy won't go in that room and if I put hher in, she cries at the door with her tail between her legs (even if I'm in there). Dusty is settling in well now, and I give her the run of the house when I'm home. She's spayed now and jabbed, so as soon as she's programmed into the cat flap and insured, she's going to be going outside which probably makes things easier on both of them.
I should also say - she managed to climb out of my bedroom window, down the dormer roof and intothe garden a couple of weeks ago - found her on th egarden fence in the morning ! So I think she's going to be ok going outside!
I should also say - she managed to climb out of my bedroom window, down the dormer roof and intothe garden a couple of weeks ago - found her on th egarden fence in the morning ! So I think she's going to be ok going outside!
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