New cat - very anxious and hissy
Discussion
No not at all 
Dusty and I are good friends now but if Dusty sees Poppy then there's a lot of noise, chasing and fur flying. Poppy appears properly scared of Dusty (who is tiny but vicious!) It's a real shame I haven't started on the Zylkene yet (will do after this weekend) and have a concerted effort because I'm going to be home for a couple of weeks. I'd just like them to tolerate each other!
And someone somewhere is feeding Poppy because she's got very fat recently !
Dusty and I are good friends now but if Dusty sees Poppy then there's a lot of noise, chasing and fur flying. Poppy appears properly scared of Dusty (who is tiny but vicious!) It's a real shame
I haven't started on the Zylkene yet (will do after this weekend) and have a concerted effort because I'm going to be home for a couple of weeks. I'd just like them to tolerate each other!And someone somewhere is feeding Poppy because she's got very fat recently !
Get a collar on Poppy with a message saying do not feed
I'd have started with the Zyklene already TBH, have they been having the Kalmaid? How many Feliway do you have plugged in? It/Pet Remedy needs to be in every room they have access to now.
They are having a battle of dominance. Poppy running away out of the house is giving Dusty the impression she is top cat.
It's good that she has calmed down with you
I'd have started with the Zyklene already TBH, have they been having the Kalmaid? How many Feliway do you have plugged in? It/Pet Remedy needs to be in every room they have access to now.
They are having a battle of dominance. Poppy running away out of the house is giving Dusty the impression she is top cat.
It's good that she has calmed down with you
Unfortunately collars last about 30 seconds on Pops And yes she was done as a kitten so no risk! She's just a tubba now !
I didn't want to start on the zylkene until I was back from a couple of work trips, but am going to start this week now I'm back for a while The plugin diffuser didn't seem to do anything. It's quite a big house so tricky to put stuff in every room, but I will be getting more and a wider variety!
And yes she was done as a kitten so no risk! She's just a tubba now !I didn't want to start on the zylkene until I was back from a couple of work trips, but am going to start this week now I'm back for a while
The plugin diffuser didn't seem to do anything. It's quite a big house so tricky to put stuff in every room, but I will be getting more and a wider variety!One step forward, two back :s
Vet recommended Nutricalm (the zylkene was doing nothing, nor was feliway and the other stuff hasn't turned up from amazon yet). So yesterday they both seemed a bit more chilled. Today was Dusty's big day to go outside. Poppy was out already and came over for a nose (she wasn't aggro) - Dusty leapt for her and chased her away over the fence
I had kept Poppy in for a few days so she remembered where she lived, and was pleased she had gone out, and then come back to the garden and back in the house today.
Dusty is something else - wondering if she's just too much for Poppy to handle, but not sure what else to do!
Vet recommended Nutricalm (the zylkene was doing nothing, nor was feliway and the other stuff hasn't turned up from amazon yet). So yesterday they both seemed a bit more chilled. Today was Dusty's big day to go outside. Poppy was out already and came over for a nose (she wasn't aggro) - Dusty leapt for her and chased her away over the fence
I had kept Poppy in for a few days so she remembered where she lived, and was pleased she had gone out, and then come back to the garden and back in the house today.
Dusty is something else - wondering if she's just too much for Poppy to handle, but not sure what else to do!
Like all things, the Zyklene would have taken a few days to settle them down; you were going to start it this week (according to your post on Monday) how long did you give it?
The whole key to this is patience, it can take months not days or weeks I'm afraid, as per MCs experience.
I've always been very lucky in introducing cats, it's on,y been days (in one case, hours
but I didn't know better & just let the new cat out in the house with the dogs & existing cars).
I think MC can help you better now, she has far more experience of cats that don't get on
Good luck!
The whole key to this is patience, it can take months not days or weeks I'm afraid, as per MCs experience.
I've always been very lucky in introducing cats, it's on,y been days (in one case, hours
but I didn't know better & just let the new cat out in the house with the dogs & existing cars).I think MC can help you better now, she has far more experience of cats that don't get on
Good luck!
You need to give zylkene 2 weeks minimum, preferably longer,you should take a look at the International Cat Care site, they have a great section for advice on everything especially behaviour. I really think you should have a good read on there and see if there is tips on it that you haven't considered.
People are guilty of being half hearted re: commitment to helping with behaviour issues (because it is hard to commmit to!!) though I'm not saying you aren't! Hopefully the ICC page will give some fresh ideas to change, the other thing to remember is that it will take up to six months to know how they will be long term. Make a note of the improvements made since you first put them together, you'll hopefully see that they have actually progressed quite a lot, it just doesn't feel lik it at times!! It may be worth trying Kalmaid as well.
It isn't easy. I know from experience!!
People are guilty of being half hearted re: commitment to helping with behaviour issues (because it is hard to commmit to!!) though I'm not saying you aren't! Hopefully the ICC page will give some fresh ideas to change, the other thing to remember is that it will take up to six months to know how they will be long term. Make a note of the improvements made since you first put them together, you'll hopefully see that they have actually progressed quite a lot, it just doesn't feel lik it at times!! It may be worth trying Kalmaid as well.
It isn't easy. I know from experience!!
Thanks Bex - I'll have a read. No issues with being in there for the long haul, I'm just mostly concerned about Poppy who disappears now for days at a time. Poor Pops just wants to be friendly, and lived with my old cat without issue.
Dusty has made huge steps forward, you're right, it's just you forget that when you've got tufts of fur flying and an upset Pops ! I didn't realise the Zylkene took so long to kick in, will persevere! Nutricalm seems to have had more of an impact so far.
Thanks everybody
PS - I think Dusty is like a kitten - everything is new, so she gets overstimulated then explodes. Which sometimes involves a nip. Which is a huge improvement to the hissing biting scratching animal which arrived. Which I'm sure was fear and anxiety. Poor thing.
Dusty has made huge steps forward, you're right, it's just you forget that when you've got tufts of fur flying and an upset Pops ! I didn't realise the Zylkene took so long to kick in, will persevere! Nutricalm seems to have had more of an impact so far.
Thanks everybody
PS - I think Dusty is like a kitten - everything is new, so she gets overstimulated then explodes. Which sometimes involves a nip. Which is a huge improvement to the hissing biting scratching animal which arrived. Which I'm sure was fear and anxiety. Poor thing.
Zylkene didn't do anything for Norman. The vet prescribed amitryptiline, which did work, in combination with introducing them gradually, for short bursts.
Bob and Norman will never be bosom buddies, but they do at least tolerate each other. The key is that they shouldn't feel as though they are in competition for resources. Cat trees, scratching posts, litter trays, beds, vantage points, water bowls, etc all need to be provided in the ratio of one per cat, plus one extra.
Boredom may also be a factor in Dusty's behaviour. I'd play with her a bit before you allow the cats to mingle, just to take the edge off her aggression. Feed them separately as well.
Finally, time. Norman is a different cat to when we first took him in a year ago, but he's still quite nervous and doesn't truly trust us. Maybe he never will, which is fine.
Bob and Norman will never be bosom buddies, but they do at least tolerate each other. The key is that they shouldn't feel as though they are in competition for resources. Cat trees, scratching posts, litter trays, beds, vantage points, water bowls, etc all need to be provided in the ratio of one per cat, plus one extra.
Boredom may also be a factor in Dusty's behaviour. I'd play with her a bit before you allow the cats to mingle, just to take the edge off her aggression. Feed them separately as well.
Finally, time. Norman is a different cat to when we first took him in a year ago, but he's still quite nervous and doesn't truly trust us. Maybe he never will, which is fine.
Well I'm almost ready to admit defeat. Dusty and I get on fine, and she's happy enough going outside etc.
However Dusty and Poppy are WWIII I am trying Zylkene, Pet Remedy plug ins, the squirty stuff on their food, and now I've had to lock Poppy in the house (she basically doesn't come home and has resorted to catching mice/birds and taking them to my neighbours house to eat and sleep), and locked Dusty in her room. I've been trying a method where you feed them either side of the door and had managed to get them eating each side of a closed door. Today Dusty caught sight of Poppy and flew at her Managed to get in between them but just when I thought we were making progress I suspect Dusty is never going to get on with another cat.
I've told my mate that he needs to start thinking about a plan b, because it isn't fair on either of them. I'll give it until the end of Jan to try and make progress but I'm not optimistic
However Dusty and Poppy are WWIII
I am trying Zylkene, Pet Remedy plug ins, the squirty stuff on their food, and now I've had to lock Poppy in the house (she basically doesn't come home and has resorted to catching mice/birds and taking them to my neighbours house to eat and sleep), and locked Dusty in her room. I've been trying a method where you feed them either side of the door and had managed to get them eating each side of a closed door. Today Dusty caught sight of Poppy and flew at her Managed to get in between them but just when I thought we were making progress I suspect Dusty is never going to get on with another cat.I've told my mate that he needs to start thinking about a plan b, because it isn't fair on either of them. I'll give it until the end of Jan to try and make progress but I'm not optimistic
Doesn't sound great, I'm starting to suspect the same, some cats are just born to be loners and not even contemplate another cat.
You are being sensible and I think a plan B is a good idea, you have tried, another month is a good time to know for sure I think, there should be signs of improvement by then eg tolerating each other majority of time.
You are being sensible and I think a plan B is a good idea, you have tried, another month is a good time to know for sure I think, there should be signs of improvement by then eg tolerating each other majority of time.
Edited by bexVN on Thursday 31st December 13:45
I think so If they were making a little progress I would be more optimistic, but at the moment I'm losing Poppy to the neighbour and that's not fair either.
My mate has gone radio silent (his usual style when he doesn't want to deal with something) which is leaving me with fewer and fewer options. I called the RSPCA yesterday (Poppy is an RSPCA rescue) but they don't take "unwanted pets" - only abandoned or cruelly treated animals. So I called the CPL who take a message and call back (not called yet but I only spoke to them yesterday afternoon).
Can you think of any other options for her? None of my friends or family want a cat (the only ones who could / would take her, already have cats so not an option)? I feel truly awful about it but there just don't seem to be any other options
If they were making a little progress I would be more optimistic, but at the moment I'm losing Poppy to the neighbour and that's not fair either.My mate has gone radio silent (his usual style when he doesn't want to deal with something) which is leaving me with fewer and fewer options. I called the RSPCA yesterday (Poppy is an RSPCA rescue) but they don't take "unwanted pets" - only abandoned or cruelly treated animals. So I called the CPL who take a message and call back (not called yet but I only spoke to them yesterday afternoon).
Can you think of any other options for her? None of my friends or family want a cat (the only ones who could / would take her, already have cats so not an option)? I feel truly awful about it but there just don't seem to be any other options
Have you asked around on FB?
Tag your mate in it, so he/family/friends can't miss it - One of them may help if they know how much she means to him & if he ever plans to come back to her...
I'm not suggesting this is a good idea! (I was horrified, but it worked)
A friend has just done this as they way of introducing her new cat to her partners hen they moved in together. She just put them in the house together, shut the cat flaps & stopped all access outside for the existing cat. Fur flew, but by the end of 2 weeks they tolerated each other.
ETA - I've ummed and ahhhed about posting that, and I'd wait to see what Bex says before even thinking about it.
Tag your mate in it, so he/family/friends can't miss it - One of them may help if they know how much she means to him & if he ever plans to come back to her...
I'm not suggesting this is a good idea! (I was horrified, but it worked)
A friend has just done this as they way of introducing her new cat to her partners hen they moved in together. She just put them in the house together, shut the cat flaps & stopped all access outside for the existing cat. Fur flew, but by the end of 2 weeks they tolerated each other.
ETA - I've ummed and ahhhed about posting that, and I'd wait to see what Bex says before even thinking about it.
Edited by ali_kat on Wednesday 6th January 09:20
, tbh it is how I have introduced any new cats in my household and how I introduced them to housemates cats! it has worked out but that was my choice generally due to knowing my cats behaviours. I've also been lucky enough to live in properties with enough space to give them room. I would not feel comfortable offering it as a way to do it as I know it is not the recommended guidelines!And neither did I ever really get full on fights etc with situations, Feliway was a useful allie aswell
To OP it may be worth asking your vets, sometimes they know clients looking for cats or other more independent cat charities.
It's how I introduced my first ever cat to a house full of dogs too, and then the subsequent 2nd cat as well. But I was late teens & didn't know better then.
Vet is a good call. They may let you advertise her in there, or be able to give you more powerful drugs to help, as they did with MCs situation.
I'd be stopping Poppy from going out though, I know it's her 'escape' but... you don't want her moving out. Can you split the house into zones? eg Upstairs & Downstairs with a baby gate, so they can live side by side without interaction until a solution (new home) is found?
Vet is a good call. They may let you advertise her in there, or be able to give you more powerful drugs to help, as they did with MCs situation.
I'd be stopping Poppy from going out though, I know it's her 'escape' but... you don't want her moving out. Can you split the house into zones? eg Upstairs & Downstairs with a baby gate, so they can live side by side without interaction until a solution (new home) is found?
Are you planning on keeping Dusty or Poppy? If the former, I would have a word with your neighbours as it sounds like they've been helping out with Poppy for a while anyway, so they might be agreeable to keeping her. Poppy is clearly not an aggressive cat and is unhappy being bullied by Dusty who is obviously an Alpha Female. It doesn't sound like you can keep them both, but I hope neither end up in a rescue centre.
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