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dmulally
2,773 posts
49 months
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Bhuvsta said: I used to be in a relationship, but then I took an arrow to the knee. Not sure if you made that joke ironically... 
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OlberJ
11,980 posts
102 months
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66comanche said: Says the expert that caused the whole Dbannatyne/Amy episode - you have a lot to learn son before you dish out advice. Is he one of your friends or something? That's twice you've tried to dig this up. Doggy want a bone?
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dmulally
2,773 posts
49 months
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OlberJ said: Is he one of your friends or something?
That's twice you've tried to dig this up. Doggy want a bone? I do. What ever happened in the end with that whole fiasco? I need internet closure.
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OlberJ
11,980 posts
102 months
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He sent another 5 emails roughly to both of us. All ignored.
He then says he's moving to Manchester. Still ignored.
He then sends her a letter. Ignored again.
He came onto the Scottish forum blaming me for not telling the whole world or those involved that he was sorry and a changed man. Then he got banned for a bit.
No idea where he is but at least the harrasment has stopped.
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NotDave
Original Poster
20,951 posts
26 months
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OlberJ said: Btw, WorAl, random flying off the hook at you doing something seemingly innocent? Sounds like someone has skeletons in her closet and she's lashing out at you to try and even up the score in her head. "I've f  ked up and shagged sumone so i'll make out that he's been just as bad. That'll even us out." Hmmmmmm I was thinking same as this is how mine worked
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Council Baby
16,128 posts
59 months
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And here in lies the problem. Some women are just jealous and damaged, unless you know the individual traits it's nigh on impossible to guess whether she's f king around, been f ked around, or is just a jealous psychopath normal female. One way or another they're way too good at lying anyway so just make up, smash it, and hide your money from day one 
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NotDave
Original Poster
20,951 posts
26 months
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And your b ks, and all knives
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The Beaver King
3,552 posts
64 months
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WorAl said: WorAl's tale of the mental. She sounds massively insecure. I'd nip this in the bud before it becomes a larger problem. I won't bother with flowers or any kind of 'sorry' gift, it sets a standard in the relationship that associates gifts with an event. The only set events you should buy gifts for are birthdays, christmas and valentines, other than that it's better to save it for random surprises. If you start buying her stuff everytime she perceives you've f ked up, they lose their meaning. The emails from the ex I would have handled in a different way. I had a similar experience about 3-4 months ago where a girl I was 'sort of' seeing a few year back messaged me on FB out of the blue. Basically she'd had a dirty dream about me and apparently couldn't stop thinking about what could of been. I replied very neutrally asking how she was, how her fiancé was (!!) and her little boy (!!!!!). We exchanged a few meassages, me making it very clear that it was nice to hear from her but I was in a happy relationship and gently suggesting that the dream and everything was probably caused by nerves and worrying about the future. I never mentioned it to my GF and won't. The messages are still in my FB inbox, so she could find them if she did some snooping, but as far as I'm concerned I have nothing to hide and she can see what my responses were. I don't think I'd want to know if my GF's ex decided to contact her. It just raises too many issues and can drag up too many negative emotions. My advice for the future. Delete the emails, don't mention it.
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Adenauer
8,930 posts
105 months
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NobleGuy
7,030 posts
84 months
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CBR JGWRR said: Carthage said: Keyser Soze said: You certainly cannot win, however you may be able to draw, if she is unwell stop of on the way home get some remedies for what ails her along with some Flowers, say sorry I handled it badly, but you are my fiancee for a reason and she is my ex for a reason
She feels loved reassured, bish bash bosh Very smooth. Take the lady's advice! Flowers always work... Hey, Carthage, how come flowers always work? Or chocolate? Buying women stuff isn't what makes them feel wanted...
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NotDave
Original Poster
20,951 posts
26 months
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NobleGuy said: Buying women stuff isn't what makes them feel wanted... It just helps to distract them from trying to kill you & gets you naughty sex
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NobleGuy
7,030 posts
84 months
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NotDave said: NobleGuy said: Buying women stuff isn't what makes them feel wanted... It just helps to distract them from trying to kill you & gets you naughty sex  Oh, as you're here. Just a quick update on Maddy - you were pretty much spot on with all your advice. The craziness during the early stages has been worth it
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NotDave
Original Poster
20,951 posts
26 months
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NobleGuy said: Oh, as you're here. Just a quick update on Maddy - you were pretty much spot on with all your advice. The craziness during the early stages has been worth it Glad to hear. So was the route cause what we thought, and safe & steady won out? TIP: save gifts and romance for when she's least expecting it, then you will get "do what you want to me" hotel sex. When mental, be there, and stay resolute
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NobleGuy
7,030 posts
84 months
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NotDave said: NobleGuy said: Oh, as you're here. Just a quick update on Maddy - you were pretty much spot on with all your advice. The craziness during the early stages has been worth it Glad to hear. So was the route cause what we thought, and safe & steady won out? TIP: save gifts and romance for when she's least expecting it, then you will get "do what you want to me" hotel sex. When mental, be there, and stay resolute Basically, yes. It took a while for her to see I wasn't just going to get bored and leave her, or stick around and treat her like crap. As for gifts, yep I only ever buy flowers when there's no reason to.
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NotDave
Original Poster
20,951 posts
26 months
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NobleGuy said: Basically, yes. It took a while for her to see I wasn't just going to get bored and leave her, or stick around and treat her like crap.
As for gifts, yep I only ever buy flowers when there's no reason to. ahh so a replica of my nutter then? the gift tip works wonders............ Grovelling has no place. Silence works. Presents/Gestures - when they're in a world of their own. Maximum appreciation. So much that the next day you walk with a limp and need redbull
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WorAl
10,877 posts
57 months
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Council Baby said: been f ked around It's this that was the problem, causing insecurities and slight jealousy. All sorted now, few tears shed, but shouting etc, but all fine and dandy now but informed that she's not to compare me to her a hole ex's.
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NotDave
Original Poster
20,951 posts
26 months
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She still will do, about every 45 minutes.
HTH
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Super Slo Mo
2,234 posts
67 months
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theshrew said: So when your Mrs / Gf or whatever lets off the mental. How do you react to the situation ??
Ive tried
Return fire = bigger mental
Try to calm situation down = bigger mental
Say nothing = bigger mental
Take dogs for a walk = got locked out
I no its a long shot but has anyone found a way that works ? Even just a little ? Try laughing. Works a treat for me, it's difficult to be angry with somone who's doubling up laughing their socks off. Having said that, my mrs isn't particularly mental, so what do I know.
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Dixie68
3,081 posts
56 months
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Bhuvsta said: I used to be in a relationship, but then I took an arrow to the knee. If you learn anything from this thread it's that it's more likely to be a fork to the knee.
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Council Baby
16,128 posts
59 months
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NotDave said: She still will do, about every 45 minutes.
HTH Oh  they love an a hole who dicks them around and f ks them over.
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