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The Beaver King
3,550 posts
64 months
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Agoogy said: Both IMO...take charm ofensive iniative, seek her and her other half out, introduce, small talk, move on, all in a smiley-I've moved and am happy air of not bothered-ness...
Thats what I'd do..and probably will be doing in the not too distant...
depending on how your current realtionship is, perhaps prep her as to what you're intending and thatere may be a polite air kiss...and a 5 mins of chat...
the alternative is that your ex tsakes that high groud or you all spend the whole evening avoiding the 'elephant in the room'...
good luck... Yeah, I'm thinking I might have to take that angle. Ignoring her would just make things very awkward and create the kind of atmosphere I'm trying to avoid. I've spoken to the GF and explained the situation, she knows that I'll have to talk to her and doesn't have a problem with it. I can't see it being a long chat though, probably the standard 'how are you? how is uni going?' type of crap. It seems very odd that she'd come to a party with her boyfriend that is inhabited by people that are good friends with her ex. I'm not exactly the quiet one at parties either, so it might make him feel a little awkward. God knows I'd feel a little put out if I went to a party and my girlfriend's ex knew everyone and was quite extrovert. Maybe I'm thinking too much into it, but I feel mindgames coming on...
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Agoogy
6,490 posts
117 months
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The Beaver King said: Yeah, I'm thinking I might have to take that angle. Ignoring her would just make things very awkward and create the kind of atmosphere I'm trying to avoid.
I've spoken to the GF and explained the situation, she knows that I'll have to talk to her and doesn't have a problem with it. I can't see it being a long chat though, probably the standard 'how are you? how is uni going?' type of crap.
It seems very odd that she'd come to a party with her boyfriend that is inhabited by people that are good friends with her ex. I'm not exactly the quiet one at parties either, so it might make him feel a little awkward. God knows I'd feel a little put out if I went to a party and my girlfriend's ex knew everyone and was quite extrovert.
Maybe I'm thinking too much into it, but I feel mindgames coming on... Depends how confident he is in himself... I've been to parties with my ex when I unattached and her new bo was there...I took the mindset that no matter how miserable my life was at that point, that we split for a reason and if she could find happiness with someone else, then good for her..and if he could do with/for her what I couldn't then good on him too... She's gone through 2 so far who couldn't...so I feel pretty justified so far. If you're comfy with why you are where you are and who you're with, then that'll come across and mind games get reversed.... Sounds a pretty easy scenario if most/all are your'e mates..just be you. Job done.
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PoleDriver
20,228 posts
63 months
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I thought this was apt!  
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NotDave
Original Poster
20,951 posts
26 months
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PoleDriver said: I thought this was apt!  Off topic, do you have experience of BRM Rover 200? Heard a rumour
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The Beaver King
3,550 posts
64 months
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Agoogy said: Depends how confident he is in himself...
I've been to parties with my ex when I unattached and her new bo was there...I took the mindset that no matter how miserable my life was at that point, that we split for a reason and if she could find happiness with someone else, then good for her..and if he could do with/for her what I couldn't then good on him too...
She's gone through 2 so far who couldn't...so I feel pretty justified so far.
If you're comfy with why you are where you are and who you're with, then that'll come across and mind games get reversed....
Sounds a pretty easy scenario if most/all are your'e mates..just be you. Job done. Aye, this is true. He could be fairly confident, hell, I might even get on with him. Jesus, that would annoy the ex. Yeah, it's my enviroment as it were, so I'm going to be pretty comfortable. She did want to stay friends after we broke up, but I suggested that for the time being it was a bad idea. This could well be her trying to get back on friendly terms with me and my friends. Again, seems odd though, she never really bothered when we were together and she has her own social circles to focus on. I suppose I won't really know her intentions until Sunday...
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PoleDriver
20,228 posts
63 months
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NotDave said: Off topic, do you have experience of BRM Rover 200? Heard a rumour I had one, what's up?
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NotDave
Original Poster
20,951 posts
26 months
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PoleDriver said: I had one, what's up? Used to have tweeked ZR.. Been offered 200 BRM with 102k on clock. All original (in-chavved) Guys valuing it at over £1k Just wondering what they're worth and if they're as much fun as the ZR? Adored that
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PoleDriver
20,228 posts
63 months
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NotDave said: Used to have tweeked ZR.. Been offered 200 BRM with 102k on clock.
All original (in-chavved)
Guys valuing it at over £1k
Just wondering what they're worth and if they're as much fun as the ZR?
Adored that Do you know who is selling? I may know the car! Have you had a look at http://www.thebrm.co.uk/ ? Lots of info and a friendly crowd on there. Personally £1K + sounds a bit high for the mileage unless it has a good service history including a well documented head gasket replacement. The interior and quirky grille are what makes the BRM special, make sure you like them before buying. The BRM's handle pretty well and are quite 'nippy' and fun to drive. If you get a good one it will be fun to drive and should hold its value pretty well as there aren't many left now. It will attract attention too!
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NotDave
Original Poster
20,951 posts
26 months
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PoleDriver said: Do you know who is selling? I may know the car! Have you had a look at http://www.thebrm.co.uk/ ? Lots of info and a friendly crowd on there. Personally £1K + sounds a bit high for the mileage unless it has a good service history including a well documented head gasket replacement. The interior and quirky grille are what makes the BRM special, make sure you like them before buying. The BRM's handle pretty well and are quite 'nippy' and fun to drive. If you get a good one it will be fun to drive and should hold its value pretty well as there aren't many left now. It will attract attention too! Thanks I'll have a nose around, as suspect he's valuing it a bit high... Maybe best off selling the Mondeo & banking some cash before an eBay hunt I love the looks and adored the steer and handling of my ZR even though it was only 120bhp 1400cc BRM I've been offered is in Spalding, Lincolnshire
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PoleDriver
20,228 posts
63 months
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NotDave said: Thanks I'll have a nose around, as suspect he's valuing it a bit high... Maybe best off selling the Mondeo & banking some cash before an eBay hunt I love the looks and adored the steer and handling of my ZR even though it was only 120bhp 1400cc BRM I've been offered is in Spalding, Lincolnshire The BRM will definitely be quicker and will probably handle a little better too!
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NotDave
Original Poster
20,951 posts
26 months
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PoleDriver said: The BRM will definitely be quicker and will probably handle a little better too! Happy days! Any issues that were not present on the Zed cars?
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ShawCrossShark
2,012 posts
103 months
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Is this the extent of male mental? Discussing the purchase of a Rover on PH Can we get back to the crazy cat women now please 
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PoleDriver
20,228 posts
63 months
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NotDave
Original Poster
20,951 posts
26 months
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As OP do I not get the right to screw with the topic?
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The Beaver King
3,550 posts
64 months
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NotDave said: As OP do I not get the right to screw with the topic? As any good mother knows, after all the nurturing and hardship faced with raising a fledgeling thread, you still have to know when it's time to let it go and make it's own way in life. I haven't posted in the meme thread for ages, but occasionally I check up on it from afar in case it needs my help...
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NotDave
Original Poster
20,951 posts
26 months
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Fine, I'll go. Just don't call me when it dies
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Echo66
108 posts
58 months
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Agoogy said: Both IMO...take charm ofensive iniative, seek her and her other half out, introduce, small talk, move on, all in a smiley-I've moved and am happy air of not bothered-ness...
Thats what I'd do..and probably will be doing in the not too distant...
depending on how your current realtionship is, perhaps prep her as to what you're intending and thatere may be a polite air kiss...and a 5 mins of chat...
the alternative is that your ex tsakes that high groud or you all spend the whole evening avoiding the 'elephant in the room'...
good luck... This. I am almost relishing the inevitable meet up with my recent ex, especially as the new girl is considerably younger than her, & me for that matter, & far better looking. Its not something I'm going to orchestrate but the three of us although unknown to each other previously go to the same wine bars & pubs etc. Its bound to happen. I will be civilised as she is still a friend but she ended it in a less than dignified way. Moving on has been relatively easy & showing as such will be a good thing to do.
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NobleGuy
7,030 posts
84 months
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Echo66 said: Agoogy said: Both IMO...take charm ofensive iniative, seek her and her other half out, introduce, small talk, move on, all in a smiley-I've moved and am happy air of not bothered-ness...
Thats what I'd do..and probably will be doing in the not too distant...
depending on how your current realtionship is, perhaps prep her as to what you're intending and thatere may be a polite air kiss...and a 5 mins of chat...
the alternative is that your ex tsakes that high groud or you all spend the whole evening avoiding the 'elephant in the room'...
good luck... This. I am almost relishing the inevitable meet up with my recent ex, especially as the new girl is considerably younger than her, & me for that matter, & far better looking. Its not something I'm going to orchestrate but the three of us although unknown to each other previously go to the same wine bars & pubs etc. Its bound to happen. I will be civilised as she is still a friend but she ended it in a less than dignified way. Moving on has been relatively easy & showing as such will be a good thing to do. If you've moved on so healthily you wouldn't even be considering showing her anything. The opposite of love isn't revenge/anger, it's indifference.
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dmulally
2,767 posts
49 months
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NobleGuy said: If you've moved on so healthily you wouldn't even be considering showing her anything.
The opposite of love isn't revenge/anger, it's indifference. Bingo.
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J a k e
690 posts
104 months
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279 said: Please don't read this in a 'keyboard warrior' vane but I'd find it incredibly, incredibly difficult to resist the the urge to turn up to the ex's door and give him a healthy dose of his own medicine. I wouldn't be doing that. Not if I only know one side of the story anyway. Unless you were closely involved at the time you cannot know what really went on and whether the 'facts' you think you know are exactly true.
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