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Paddy_N_Murphy
15,248 posts
54 months
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Gargamel said: It was more of an al la carte list rather than a set course meal..... 
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funkyrobot
Original Poster
6,123 posts
98 months
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Paddy_N_Murphy said: Then find a crowd. Go as a fake group, go on your own and dead in the water..... Got money ? What age are you? What do you enjoy doing? Do ya think you could learn to drink  I was saving for my first house (she has one but we were going to get one together) so I have money. I'm 32 so not too young and not too old I suppose. Not sure about the drinking thing as I had alcoholic father, and have a brother who is struggling with an alcohol dependency. I guess I need to find a crowd then 
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funkyrobot
Original Poster
6,123 posts
98 months
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Paddy_N_Murphy said: Gargamel said: It was more of an al la carte list rather than a set course meal.....   I know. I'm typing this on an iPad so keeping my responses brief. Was going to say more about that list 
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Paddy_N_Murphy
15,248 posts
54 months
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funkyrobot said: I guess I need to find a crowd then   & don't get trod on.
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Ilikebeaver
976 posts
51 months
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Sorry to hear about your brake up.
It is a shame that it took you both 8 years to find out you wanted different things from the relationship.
Was the idea of kids not bought up before you got engaged?
Sorry of it sounds harsh, but as a female and someone who is looking forward to starting my life with my fiancé, I would be so upset of he turned around now and said he didn't want to start a family
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funkyrobot
Original Poster
6,123 posts
98 months
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Paddy_N_Murphy said: funkyrobot said: I guess I need to find a crowd then   & don't get trod on.  I'm 6ft 5 so generally tread on others, accidentally.  Thanks.
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Gargamel
5,538 posts
131 months
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Ilikebeaver said: Sorry to hear about your brake up.
It is a shame that it took you both 8 years to find out you wanted different things from the relationship.
Was the idea of kids not bought up before you got engaged?
Sorry of it sounds harsh, but as a female and someone who is looking forward to starting my life with my fiancé, I would be so upset of he turned around now and said he didn't want to start a family Well it is April 1st tomorrow an ideal time to find out your bf's reactions to "happy news" Do let us know how it goes.....
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Rollcage
9,465 posts
62 months
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Given the info from you a few posts above, I'd lay off the alcohol - despite what others may tell you, it really won't help.  You'll get over it, even though it feels like you won't - best to be out of it now than get tricked into something you don't want, because that sounds like it would have been next on her list! You'll be counting this as a lucky escape in a year or so, believe me!
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funkyrobot
Original Poster
6,123 posts
98 months
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Ilikebeaver said: Sorry to hear about your brake up.
It is a shame that it took you both 8 years to find out you wanted different things from the relationship.
Was the idea of kids not bought up before you got engaged?
Sorry of it sounds harsh, but as a female and someone who is looking forward to starting my life with my fiancé, I would be so upset of he turned around now and said he didn't want to start a family Thanks. Up until Christmas last year she was happy with what we had. Then, all of a sudden I think it dawned on her that she wanted a family, now. The thing is, I haven't said i never want children, I just don't want them now. I guess the body clock is ticking.
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funkyrobot
Original Poster
6,123 posts
98 months
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Rollcage said: Given the above post, I'd lay off the alcohol - despite what others may tell you, it really won't help.  You'll get over it, even though it feels like you won't - best to be out of it now than get tricked into something you don't want, because that sounds like it would have been next on her list! You'll be counting this as a lucky escape in a year or so, believe me! Thanks. My friend said pretty much the same today. He said one day soon you'll think 'phew, glad I'm out of that one'. It'll just take time to get there I guess.
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Tyrewrecker
6,419 posts
24 months
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Paddy_N_Murphy said: Nope, go on holiday with a crowd. Not on your own.
If you have been relationshipiised for 8 years, you have no idea how to crack on with other strangers, Muscl in on a group. Just because he has been in a relationship shouldn't mean he does not know how to act in a group?!
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Gaspode
2,705 posts
66 months
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At 32, you are the ideal age, you can go out with girls who are still at college and their mums too!
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Paddy_N_Murphy
15,248 posts
54 months
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Tyrewrecker said: Paddy_N_Murphy said: Nope, go on holiday with a crowd. Not on your own.
If you have been relationshipiised for 8 years, you have no idea how to crack on with other strangers, Muscl in on a group. Just because he has been in a relationship shouldn't mean he does not know how to act in a group?! Yep. That is actually my point. I was saying don't go away hoping to 'find' people is what I am saying.
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Tyrewrecker
6,419 posts
24 months
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Paddy_N_Murphy said: Yep.
That is actually my point.
I was saying don't go away hoping to 'find' people is what I am saying. If you are sociable it should not matter how long you have been in a relationship.
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Ilikebeaver
976 posts
51 months
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Gargamel said: Well it is April 1st tomorrow an ideal time to find out your bf's reactions to "happy news"
Do let us know how it goes..... Hmmm. Well I won't be telling him that I am pregnant for April fools. Thats just a bit sick
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funkyrobot
Original Poster
6,123 posts
98 months
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Gaspode said: At 32, you are the ideal age, you can go out with girls who are still at college and their mums too! Nice.  Looks like I need to hit plenty of fish then! Speaking of that site, some of it is, erm, scary.
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Ilikebeaver
976 posts
51 months
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funkyrobot said: Thanks.
Up until Christmas last year she was happy with what we had. Then, all of a sudden I think it dawned on her that she wanted a family, now. The thing is, I haven't said i never want children, I just don't want them now.
I guess the body clock is ticking. She was willing to throw away an 8 year relationship because she changed her mind all of a sudden, needs children now, and couldn't wait for you to be ready?! Then again, if you thought your mind would have changed in the next few years, you probably wouldn't have let her go
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Rollcage
9,465 posts
62 months
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funkyrobot said: Nice.  Looks like I need to hit plenty of fish then! Speaking of that site, all of them are bats t mental.EFA
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funkyrobot
Original Poster
6,123 posts
98 months
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Tyrewrecker said: Paddy_N_Murphy said: Yep.
That is actually my point.
I was saying don't go away hoping to 'find' people is what I am saying. If you are sociable it should not matter how long you have been in a relationship. I'm generally quite sociable. I just get really nervous about asking women out. 
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funkyrobot
Original Poster
6,123 posts
98 months
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Ilikebeaver said: She was willing to throw away an 8 year relationship because she changed her mind all of a sudden, needs children now, and couldn't wait for you to be ready?!
Then again, if you thought your mind would have changed in the next few years, you probably wouldn't have let her go The children thing came to the fore at Christmas. My other brother (not the drunk) became a dad last summer and we have been spending time with my nephew. On reflection, she has probably wanted kids for a while now but didn't say anything. Our relationship slowly went downhill from our failed attempt at marriage last september. I don't know what I'll feel in a few years. As for just letting her go, this wasn't the case. She didn't want me around anymore and didn't want to be with me. I took the hint as hanging around wouldn't be right.
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