|
Pesty
25,852 posts
125 months
|
Mx5guy said: Just to provide an alternative opinion - it's not always true. My ex hasn't done that, and I'm sure it's the same for a lot of other people. did your ex leave you because she had feelings for somebody else you know like the ops did you don't just develop feelings and leave on a whim, bit of flirting then a snog and a grope followed by a meeting at a hotel then you develope feelings and leave the BF.
|
|
|
Mx5guy
2,983 posts
70 months
|
Pesty said: did your ex leave you because she had feelings for somebody else you know like the ops did
you don't just develop feelings and leave on a whim, bit of flirting then a snog and a grope followed by a meeting at a hotel then you develope feelings and leave the BF. No, we're not together now because we didn't work out. It's as simple as that. She hasn't moved onto someone else, so it has nothing to do with waiting for someone else to come along before jumping ship. It happens a lot, but it's not as bad as most PHers make out, unless most PHers seem to choose someone who would do that. ETA: I misunderstood a little. I'm not saying it didn't happen like that, but sometimes people stick together because of habit, and so it could have been she had ended the relationship in her head a while back. Then when someone else came along it gave her the motivation to get out and try from then.
|
|
|
Bolognese
1,413 posts
93 months
|
Taras said: Definitly time for a motorcycle. Whenever you find yourself in your thoughts, put on your helmet and go be a bad ass.
Ex's resent it when you get bad ass. 
|
|
|
marcosgt
6,195 posts
45 months
|
Phil Dicky said: Adamp said: whatching v8 super cars and gt3 wasn't allowed to do that before. FFS...did you really type that !!!!!! Ha ha - Celebrate your new found freedom... I mean "wasn't allowed"? You, my friend, have had a VERY lucky escape! M.
|
|
|
Adamp
Original Poster
131 posts
83 months
|
To be fair I don't think she has been shagging him as much as you guys may think. Yeah I do think she may of feathered her nest before finishing with me.
I know him through business needless to say wont be doing anymore with him. She met her at her place of work he goes in there.
I hope it all comes crashing down on them and I will be in a much better place by then and able to laugh.
I'm going to look at a 172 Wednesday now.
|
Advertisement
|
|
|
GC8
9,528 posts
59 months
|
Already things are looking up. You can watch what you want on your own telly and youre finally getting a car that youd like.
All you need to now is bang his sister and youll be well on your way!
|
|
|
Marlin45
616 posts
33 months
|
OP I went through a similar situation 5 years ago and split with the ex-wife after 12 years. Luckily no kids and no other bloke involved (AFAIK - I pity him if he was). At the time I was devestated and like you the questions of how will I cope, house, blah blah......after a few weeks of fighting it I drew a line in the sand and said get over it and move on with your life (MTFU). That didn't stop me having a few nights on the pop though. Some mates rallied round which proved who the good guys were and who weren't IMHO. After the decision to make a fresh start (and pour money in the direction of the legal profession to 'fix' the ex's wants) I did join a couple of dateing sites to see what was out there....but I was pretty specific this time in who I was looking for. No Match.com Eharmony plastic ex-bimbo nonsense I want a country girl who didn't mind mud, guns, horses & 4x4's and had an aversion to shopping and handbag collecting. I achieved that goal and we now have a 7 month old beautiful baby girl (I did try out the selection before I settled down though)  Look at this as a fresh start. Look want you want out of life and decide what you need to do to achieve it and to avoid meeting another girl like your ex? Now off to order more online parts for the expanding motorcycle and 4x4 collection that the new GF keeps letting me buy 
|
|
|
Reardy Mister
11,039 posts
91 months
|
johnfm said: I reckon you are better of getting out earlier before kids and decades of pent up resentment.
Go find one who likes you for what you are and lets you do the things that make you happy.
You're only young once, and a long time dead.  Thanks for this.
|
|
|
Rude-boy
15,526 posts
102 months
|
Adamp said: To be fair I don't think she has been shagging him as much as you guys may think. Yeah I do think she may of feathered her nest before finishing with me.
I know him through business needless to say wont be doing anymore with him. She met her at her place of work he goes in there.
I hope it all comes crashing down on them and I will be in a much better place by then and able to laugh.
I'm going to look at a 172 Wednesday now. A 172 is no match for an S3.
|
|
|
Rude-boy
15,526 posts
102 months
|
Marlin45 said: ...but I was pretty specific this time in who I was looking for. No Match.com Eharmony plastic ex-bimbo nonsense I want a country girl who didn't mind mud, guns, horses & 4x4's and had an aversion to shopping and handbag collecting. I achieved that goal and we now have a 7 month old beautiful baby girl (I did try out the selection before I settled down though) Wise words. You must choose your partner on compatibility, not on looks, the ability to suck a golf ball through a hosepipe, etc, etc, alone. Work out what is really important to you and your life and how you see yourself over the years (in very general terms!) and go from there. I work all week and then get up at stupid early hours to go motor racing almost every weekend from March to November. I would get through girlfriends like hot dinners as they just could not put up with it. It is my life though and I’d rather have stayed single than give that up. Luckily I found a woman as nuts about cars and me as I am about cars and her. We share the same attitude to money, she loves cooking, I love eating good food so all is good 
|
|
|
therealpigdog
2,189 posts
66 months
|
Marlin45 said: OP I went through a similar situation 5 years ago and split with the ex-wife after 12 years. Luckily no kids and no other bloke involved (AFAIK - I pity him if he was). At the time I was devestated and like you the questions of how will I cope, house, blah blah......after a few weeks of fighting it I drew a line in the sand and said get over it and move on with your life (MTFU). That didn't stop me having a few nights on the pop though. Some mates rallied round which proved who the good guys were and who weren't IMHO. After the decision to make a fresh start (and pour money in the direction of the legal profession to 'fix' the ex's wants) I did join a couple of dateing sites to see what was out there....but I was pretty specific this time in who I was looking for. No Match.com Eharmony plastic ex-bimbo nonsense I want a country girl who didn't mind mud, guns, horses & 4x4's and had an aversion to shopping and handbag collecting. I achieved that goal and we now have a 7 month old beautiful baby girl (I did try out the selection before I settled down though) Look at this as a fresh start. Look want you want out of life and decide what you need to do to achieve it and to avoid meeting another girl like your ex? Now off to order more online parts for the expanding motorcycle and 4x4 collection that the new GF keeps letting me buy +1. Except for the motorcycles and the 7 month old - our first is due in June though. Infinitely happier now than I ever was with the ex. She took me for every penny, and so whilst it was an expensive mistake in some respects, in other respects it was fantastic value for money just to get rid of her. oh, and I bought a new car within weeks too!
|
|
|
R1gtr
1,056 posts
23 months
|
Same happened to me, got pretty depressed but my friends helped me out. It will be hard on days you have nothing to do as she will enter your mind-bet she having great time etc whilst you sat on your ass bored. Basically, buy a 172 and start bike lessons, I did my bike test, best thing ever. Get away to some away footie games, Train down, Travel lodge, few beers with the lads, pump dirty birds Destroy any female that is up for it, her sister, her mum (they may be ugly but you will smile every time you see your ex) Buy some new clothes so you are looking sharp in case you bump into her, tell her things going great, brag about what you been upto, she might think you are bragging but deep down it will annoy the ti*s off her. Get a good dvd boxset for the lonely times and you will be sorted, best of luck
|
|
|
matc
4,279 posts
76 months
|
therealpigdog said: Marlin45 said: OP I went through a similar situation 5 years ago and split with the ex-wife after 12 years. Luckily no kids and no other bloke involved (AFAIK - I pity him if he was). At the time I was devestated and like you the questions of how will I cope, house, blah blah......after a few weeks of fighting it I drew a line in the sand and said get over it and move on with your life (MTFU). That didn't stop me having a few nights on the pop though. Some mates rallied round which proved who the good guys were and who weren't IMHO. After the decision to make a fresh start (and pour money in the direction of the legal profession to 'fix' the ex's wants) I did join a couple of dateing sites to see what was out there....but I was pretty specific this time in who I was looking for. No Match.com Eharmony plastic ex-bimbo nonsense I want a country girl who didn't mind mud, guns, horses & 4x4's and had an aversion to shopping and handbag collecting. I achieved that goal and we now have a 7 month old beautiful baby girl (I did try out the selection before I settled down though) Look at this as a fresh start. Look want you want out of life and decide what you need to do to achieve it and to avoid meeting another girl like your ex? Now off to order more online parts for the expanding motorcycle and 4x4 collection that the new GF keeps letting me buy +1. Except for the motorcycles and the 7 month old - our first is due in June though. Infinitely happier now than I ever was with the ex. She took me for every penny, and so whilst it was an expensive mistake in some respects, in other respects it was fantastic value for money just to get rid of her. oh, and I bought a new car within weeks too! Another +1 here, our little lady was 8 months on Sunday! Owned a Porsche and a Ferrari whilst I was enjoying single life, now loving my new life more than I ever did before. OP I know it's hard, but the best bit of advice I could give would be to stop any contact with her, even the odd little text now and then; you'll move on much faster - trust me.
|
|
|
NotDave
20,951 posts
26 months
|
Council Baby said: Happens to all of us at some point or another. The first few days are usually a spiral downwards into a depressed alcoholic blur, followed by a serious dose of manning the f  k up, going out and enjoying all the things you couldn't while you were with them, clearing all of their stuff out of your life as fast as possible then getting back on the horse and waiting to get s t all over again by the next one. Such is the circle of life, doesn't stop us rolling the dice. Take a holiday, buy a new car, go skydiving, get drunk... Whatever floats your boat - because you now can. Did I miss an update? OP: Nail any female she's related to or friends with. if that fails, find a big boobed, drunken, older woman who will do ANYTHING. Worked for me.
|
|
|
bobbylondonuk
1,762 posts
59 months
|
1. Give little Johnny a mission... it should not include the ex in the mission planning.
2. Send little johnny on any adventure that you can find
3. Get your petrol veins and wallet pumping...because that is what gets little johhny some action.
4. Get little johnny to take a back seat while you evaluate potential medium term parking space for little johnny
5. Be straight up ruthless in what you expect and what you can provide. Any deviation..send little johhny back to step 1.
If step 4 is successful...wait till your new parking space turns to an ex parking space and go back to step 1
|
|
|
Council Baby
16,105 posts
59 months
|
NotDave said: Did I miss an update?
OP: Nail any female she's related to or friends with. if that fails, find a big boobed, drunken, older woman who will do ANYTHING. Worked for me.  Cheeky f ker... clearly that option isn't open to me, but being as this is a car forum it was a sensible suggestion. I'm not an advocate of the nail friends/family thing, it stinks of spite. Just clear out her things, go have fun, and move on. Revenge is pointless, and f king their friends or rubbing their face in it will only serve to make you more bitter and incur their wrath. Yes you will think of them every day for a while - time alone will change this (along with another target of your affections perhaps). Cut all contact unless absolutely necessary as fast as possible (easier said than done in the first week or two) and get on with your life.
|
|
|
tj2002
411 posts
62 months
|
I know this is a car forum but seeing as how you're newly single and about to get yourself out of a mortgage, it might be the ideal time to get out and see a bit of the world rather than pump any spare cash into a new motor.
I'm recently back from 3 months in South East Asia, cost me about £3.5k all in and for the sights and experiences thats a bargain. Loads of partying, single girls and maybe even a little culture and learning about yourself too.
Thats what i'd be doing if i wanted to get over someone
|
|
|
NotDave
20,951 posts
26 months
|
Council Baby said: Cheeky f ker... clearly that option isn't open to me, but being as this is a car forum it was a sensible suggestion. I'm not an advocate of the nail friends/family thing, it stinks of spite. Just clear out her things, go have fun, and move on. Revenge is pointless, and f king their friends or rubbing their face in it will only serve to make you more bitter and incur their wrath. Yes you will think of them every day for a while - time alone will change this (along with another target of your affections perhaps). Cut all contact unless absolutely necessary as fast as possible (easier said than done in the first week or two) and get on with your life.  I wasn't having a dig. I just thought you'd maybe bought a "project" Fezza that was sat winking at you in the garage awaiting them L plates being slapped on  Obviously not. As for the friends and family thing, touche. Nail a desperate drunk fatty. Works much better
|
|
|
Firefoot
1,449 posts
86 months
|
Adamp said: Thankfully we do not have kids but do have a house we bought last July so can't even get out of it either so were are looking to rent. Why are neither of you still living in the house? Is the mortgage still being paid by anyone? Sorry to be practical but this needs sorting unless you want debt to follow you into your new found freedom.
|
|
|
Rude-boy
15,526 posts
102 months
|
Council Baby said: Revenge is pointless. Not quite. Geroget Herbert said: Living well is the best revenge. That does not mean nailing relatives of ex's but getting on with your life and making it a happy one. Nothing, and I mean NOTHING, gets on an ex's wick as much as seeing the person they left or caused to leave do better without them than they ever did with them. Forget the ex, learn what works for you and doesn't and move onwards and upwards.
|
|
