rowdy xmas parties
Discussion
So, the worst was a few years ago.
The girls who arranged it were lovely but common as muck and got into a slanging mach with each other, most of the client staff that went were fairly overweight and boring admin girls who then joined in with the slanging match and kicked off like an Irish funeral.
The cleaning staff were invited, mostly Polish, the girls looked like (and by all accounts could be hired like) hookers, the boys looked like gangster wannabes and it then kicked off with the two Latvian engineers (again).
We were all given 3 drink tokens, all the Muslim lads have gave them up to the person that could get themselves into the most trouble when drunk (yes Terry, i'm f
king talking about your naked, signing, spewing antics).
My team were ordered to be on their best behavior by our boss and we were, mostly if you don't count Terry. However our area colleagues had been given a free reign as their two site managers refused to turn up due to an incident the year before involving both of them being caught having sex with one of the "cleaners for hire" in the car park by the Client who was paying for it all.
It didn't turn out as expected and a Multi-national company were barred from a well respected hotel.
The girls who arranged it were lovely but common as muck and got into a slanging mach with each other, most of the client staff that went were fairly overweight and boring admin girls who then joined in with the slanging match and kicked off like an Irish funeral.
The cleaning staff were invited, mostly Polish, the girls looked like (and by all accounts could be hired like) hookers, the boys looked like gangster wannabes and it then kicked off with the two Latvian engineers (again).
We were all given 3 drink tokens, all the Muslim lads have gave them up to the person that could get themselves into the most trouble when drunk (yes Terry, i'm f
king talking about your naked, signing, spewing antics).My team were ordered to be on their best behavior by our boss and we were, mostly if you don't count Terry. However our area colleagues had been given a free reign as their two site managers refused to turn up due to an incident the year before involving both of them being caught having sex with one of the "cleaners for hire" in the car park by the Client who was paying for it all.
It didn't turn out as expected and a Multi-national company were barred from a well respected hotel.
My wife's ones have been pretty good.
One year, the bosses son in law came along.....
One of those silly noisy balloons made it's way onto the curtain beside his table. He proceeds (already drunk) to climb on the table, the table flips over, food and drink everywhere! I mean serious mess over everyone and everything, gravy, red wine etc..
In his panic, he grabs the curtain to save himself, and brings down the whole pole and curtains (not small - they're in a big hotel type place around 15 ft high run a similar distance along, crashing down on the table next to him, sending even more stuff sailing across the place
Later that evening, myself one of the other husbands decided to ride each other like horses for some unknow reason...the wife's boss comes up to us completely straight faced ..."I don't think that's appropriate gents"
No-one got ejected either, which is a miracle.
Good bunch though.
Masked ball thingy next week, I suspect chaos.
One year, the bosses son in law came along.....
One of those silly noisy balloons made it's way onto the curtain beside his table. He proceeds (already drunk) to climb on the table, the table flips over, food and drink everywhere! I mean serious mess over everyone and everything, gravy, red wine etc..
In his panic, he grabs the curtain to save himself, and brings down the whole pole and curtains (not small - they're in a big hotel type place around 15 ft high run a similar distance along, crashing down on the table next to him, sending even more stuff sailing across the place
Later that evening, myself one of the other husbands decided to ride each other like horses for some unknow reason...the wife's boss comes up to us completely straight faced ..."I don't think that's appropriate gents"
No-one got ejected either, which is a miracle.
Good bunch though.
Masked ball thingy next week, I suspect chaos.
I was on duty one time and was hoping it would be quiet. Got settled at the desk and waited for the phone to ring. Then, all of a sudden, it went mad.
The phone lit up, the radio I have was full of chatter and social media sites went mental. Godzilla had come to town with some friends (Staypuft and Susan Boyle). She scared the st out of me.
I had to get across town and take her down before ITV got hold of the story. I thought that rather than driving there and deploying my 50 cal rifle, I'd just run her down.
I did get there in the end but she had gone. Godzilla said she had been drinking and went off to a kebab shop. Staypuft wasn't interested as he had found a candy floss store and was eating the roof. I had to go back to the office knowing Susan was still loose.
Odd one that.
The phone lit up, the radio I have was full of chatter and social media sites went mental. Godzilla had come to town with some friends (Staypuft and Susan Boyle). She scared the s
t out of me.I had to get across town and take her down before ITV got hold of the story. I thought that rather than driving there and deploying my 50 cal rifle, I'd just run her down.
I did get there in the end but she had gone. Godzilla said she had been drinking and went off to a kebab shop. Staypuft wasn't interested as he had found a candy floss store and was eating the roof. I had to go back to the office knowing Susan was still loose.
Odd one that.
My mate works for an insurance company and they have an office of a couple of hundred people. Apparently without fail there are a couple of people sacked every year after the Christmas party.
Sounds terrible to me and I can't understand why they keep it going.
However this is the same place that let someone go while they were dressed as a banana on some fancy dress day.
Sounds terrible to me and I can't understand why they keep it going.
However this is the same place that let someone go while they were dressed as a banana on some fancy dress day.
rpguk said:
My mate works for an insurance company and they have an office of a couple of hundred people. Apparently without fail there are a couple of people sacked every year after the Christmas party.
Sounds terrible to me and I can't understand why they keep it going.
However this is the same place that let someone go while they were dressed as a banana on some fancy dress day.
Thats doesn't sound a-peeling at all!!Sounds terrible to me and I can't understand why they keep it going.
However this is the same place that let someone go while they were dressed as a banana on some fancy dress day.
At one Christmas do, the company got barred from a rather nice Cheshire hotel.
All started well, nice meal, bit of dancing, and plenty of booze.
One of the lads was seeing a girl from the call centre, and was known not to get on with one of the other lads in his team.
Part way through the evening, there is bickering between the two of them.
Later still, lad 1 gets a phone call saying 'I'm in room xxxx with your misses - enjoy the thought of me doing her up the wrongun'
Needless to say it resulted in an almighty punch up, and about half a dozen staff being given accommodation, curtesy of the local plod!
All started well, nice meal, bit of dancing, and plenty of booze.
One of the lads was seeing a girl from the call centre, and was known not to get on with one of the other lads in his team.
Part way through the evening, there is bickering between the two of them.
Later still, lad 1 gets a phone call saying 'I'm in room xxxx with your misses - enjoy the thought of me doing her up the wrongun'
Needless to say it resulted in an almighty punch up, and about half a dozen staff being given accommodation, curtesy of the local plod!
Had a couple of fist fights and one bloke stripping on the dance floor.
After one the newest member of staff (lovely new 18 year old secretary) got taken home by the MD (he was doing the right thing making sure she was ok) and all was well, until she threw up on his rather expensive suit and shoes...... The entire office, and I do mean the entire office, sat there the next morning and watched her crawl into his office to apologise!
ETA - ah I forgot, one couple got married after the Christmas do, which was in no way related to the birth of their baby girl the following September......
After one the newest member of staff (lovely new 18 year old secretary) got taken home by the MD (he was doing the right thing making sure she was ok) and all was well, until she threw up on his rather expensive suit and shoes...... The entire office, and I do mean the entire office, sat there the next morning and watched her crawl into his office to apologise!
ETA - ah I forgot, one couple got married after the Christmas do, which was in no way related to the birth of their baby girl the following September......
The most exciting thing that ever happens at one of ours is that one of the engineers' wives never fails to get drunk and cop off with one of the other lads from the building, all whilst her hubby sits at his table looking forlorn.
Still, she is a milf, so hopefully this year could be my turn
Still, she is a milf, so hopefully this year could be my turn
DrTre said:
I went to my wife's one a few years back. Flew in specially for it. She was a bit off with me for some reason, think I'd been working too hard or something. Anyway she introduced me to a couple of colleagues, one of whom was a total dick.
I went to her office to freshen up a little and the next thing I know there is an almighty commotion downstairs.
All hell breaks loose. I realise I'm best off not showing my face so I sneak upstairs.
fk me. Next thing I see some bloke shooting the wife's boss in the head! Then I realise there's loads of these blokes all over the building!
Well I decide to call the cops and when they turn up they only get blown up by the terrorists. Well it's then I realise it's me vs them and it all kicked off big style.
lol, niceI went to her office to freshen up a little and the next thing I know there is an almighty commotion downstairs.
All hell breaks loose. I realise I'm best off not showing my face so I sneak upstairs.
f
k me. Next thing I see some bloke shooting the wife's boss in the head! Then I realise there's loads of these blokes all over the building!Well I decide to call the cops and when they turn up they only get blown up by the terrorists. Well it's then I realise it's me vs them and it all kicked off big style.
i was wondering if that was die hard - i dont really know why though - i couldnt even tell you the plot before the big shootouts if you'd asked me
Not a Xmas party, but a good story nonetheless...
A mate and business owner of mine told me one of his customers was having an invitation only party at a local pub - for 'Beaujolais Day'...his customer was a Freemason, and he said it would all be mostly other Masons and their guests.
Strangely, it was an event that started in the morning. He told me that I'd 'enjoy it' but wouldn't elaborate anymore, save for a grin.
So, we turn up at this fairly innocuous country pub, and in we go, past two very strict-looking doormen. When we went in, the pub was rammed full of blokes, and we all sat down, being told that breakfast would soon be served. The first strange thing was that all the curtains were closed
Presently, the front door opens again, and in walk a dozen of what I can only describe as 'tarts'
10 minutes later, the 'tarts' all start to pile out of the kitchens, carrying plates of breakfasts, and serving them up to us. They were carrying plates only about their person - clothes weren't featuring at all!
And then when breakfast was finished, it turns out the 'tarts' were, let's say, a gentleman's special interest kind of woman...
I can only leave the rest of it to your imagination, but it involved tables, chairs, the pool table, pool cues, bottles, and bits of people's bodies. I can honestly say I've never attended a party like it before or since
A mate and business owner of mine told me one of his customers was having an invitation only party at a local pub - for 'Beaujolais Day'...his customer was a Freemason, and he said it would all be mostly other Masons and their guests.
Strangely, it was an event that started in the morning. He told me that I'd 'enjoy it' but wouldn't elaborate anymore, save for a grin.
So, we turn up at this fairly innocuous country pub, and in we go, past two very strict-looking doormen. When we went in, the pub was rammed full of blokes, and we all sat down, being told that breakfast would soon be served. The first strange thing was that all the curtains were closed
Presently, the front door opens again, and in walk a dozen of what I can only describe as 'tarts'
10 minutes later, the 'tarts' all start to pile out of the kitchens, carrying plates of breakfasts, and serving them up to us. They were carrying plates only about their person - clothes weren't featuring at all!
And then when breakfast was finished, it turns out the 'tarts' were, let's say, a gentleman's special interest kind of woman...
I can only leave the rest of it to your imagination, but it involved tables, chairs, the pool table, pool cues, bottles, and bits of people's bodies. I can honestly say I've never attended a party like it before or since
Monkeylegend said:
We pulled a christmas cracker at one of ours once.
I have a vague memory of calling out like a dying donkey to a regional director of mine. From a coal shed. She had these weird heels which made her walk like a robotic Japanese toy Pekingese in beta version, but I liked her at the time because she had real boobs. They mesmirised me at the time. At least you got your cracker pulled. Do what I done, get magnificently sozzled, tell everyone they are w*nkers and st at thier job, including your boss (but unlike me do not tell her that her moustache annoys you), then casually saunter off to another companies table and join that party for the rest of the evening. I worked for the company three days prior to the party. For the life I me I don't know why I wasn't bagged! Still there. The following Monday was.. let's say... Interesting! Actually, I've almost turned my colleagues round to liking me. Mind you the next ones this Saturday!
Most memorable has to be the new girl making an impression by pleasuring herself with a dildo shaped bottle of lube which had been brought as a secret santa gift (for someone else), in one of the hotel rooms while every man and his dog try's to squeeze in for a peek. Chaos.
Obviously I wasn't one of them and had to make do with seeing the pictures
Obviously I wasn't one of them and had to make do with seeing the pictures
I work as night manager in a large hotel that caters for Xmas parties some of the recent highlights include;
- Girl and guy who were arguing all night, eventually she glasses him, and when chasing after her he punches a large glass picture, breaking the glass and pealing his knuckles back to the bone. He wanted to leave in a taxi, I told him the only way he was leaving was in an ambulance as he looked like an extra from a horror movie.
- 40 year old woman who whilst verrrrry drunk went to the toilet and whilst sitting there vomited into her pants and trousers which were around her ankles, passed out on the floor and then proceeded to st herself as well. Eventually she came around enough to get her husbands number up on her phone. When he arrived he went batst mental at me for letting her get like that! Both were told to get out pronto.
- Report of 2 women fighting in the toilet, go in to check to be confronted by a woman with her skirt up round her waist and top pulled right down, wrestling with another whose dress was ripped in half. Didn't know whether to split it up or sell tickets.
- So many drunk men passed out in the stupidest of places and drunk crying women than I care to remember.
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