The Cancer Kiss off - being dumped after diagnosis
Discussion
Thank you Kinky and all of you guys.
Had some good news. Me and my dad went to see a solicitor on Tuesday regarding the divorce/financial order and matters to do with the house. The guy seems really sharp and on the ball and gave us some excellent advice without all the BS. Dads happy to cover the costs as long as I pay him back when I'm fit, well and back to work.
Although I have a Mckenzie friend helping me with my contact order, the solicitor also gave us some excellent advice on eventually helping to get part residency...but that's somewhere down the line.
Health wise, my radiotherapy has been delayed yet again. I'm due yet another MRi and PET scan next week. Once I get a all clear it hasn't spread then ill be hopefully getting zapped within a couple of weeks.
My sleeping pattern has much improved, although like now, I tend to wake for a couple of hours then sleep til about midday! Whilst som may complain of the heat, I absolutely love it. I was out at an off road rc club last Sunday racing in the club meeting which was great fun. Amazing how a few hours of being distracted can help alleviate pain to some degree.
My brothers also kindly offered to take me down to the F1 young driver test at Silverstone, so maybe down there Friday.
Saturday I'm seeing my boy after 4 weeks (she called him in sick last meeting 2 weeks ago) so really looking forward to that. Been missing him so much.
Also, rightly or wrongly been getting thoughts of how nice it would be to be in a loving relationship with someone for a change....something I've desperately missed all these years. I'm not looking at someone to take care of me, rather someone who I can spend some time with, go out some more and share the simple things, woot having an argument. I then think of my colostomy and my cancer and it just becomes a horrible dream. My goal is to get better and be with my son, without a doubt but me longing for what I'm feeling, is that so unrealistic?
Had some good news. Me and my dad went to see a solicitor on Tuesday regarding the divorce/financial order and matters to do with the house. The guy seems really sharp and on the ball and gave us some excellent advice without all the BS. Dads happy to cover the costs as long as I pay him back when I'm fit, well and back to work.
Although I have a Mckenzie friend helping me with my contact order, the solicitor also gave us some excellent advice on eventually helping to get part residency...but that's somewhere down the line.
Health wise, my radiotherapy has been delayed yet again. I'm due yet another MRi and PET scan next week. Once I get a all clear it hasn't spread then ill be hopefully getting zapped within a couple of weeks.
My sleeping pattern has much improved, although like now, I tend to wake for a couple of hours then sleep til about midday! Whilst som may complain of the heat, I absolutely love it. I was out at an off road rc club last Sunday racing in the club meeting which was great fun. Amazing how a few hours of being distracted can help alleviate pain to some degree.
My brothers also kindly offered to take me down to the F1 young driver test at Silverstone, so maybe down there Friday.
Saturday I'm seeing my boy after 4 weeks (she called him in sick last meeting 2 weeks ago) so really looking forward to that. Been missing him so much.
Also, rightly or wrongly been getting thoughts of how nice it would be to be in a loving relationship with someone for a change....something I've desperately missed all these years. I'm not looking at someone to take care of me, rather someone who I can spend some time with, go out some more and share the simple things, woot having an argument. I then think of my colostomy and my cancer and it just becomes a horrible dream. My goal is to get better and be with my son, without a doubt but me longing for what I'm feeling, is that so unrealistic?
Glad to see things are looking better, I really do hope it all works out 
When your lad's older he'll think the world of his father who made such a huge effort to make sure his son doesn't become a stranger to him, and this thread is proof of that, and long may it be.
As for the feelings, of course they are normal, perfectly natural, although I'm afraid I can't offer any advice as its not my area of expertise.
Keep fighting
When your lad's older he'll think the world of his father who made such a huge effort to make sure his son doesn't become a stranger to him, and this thread is proof of that, and long may it be.
As for the feelings, of course they are normal, perfectly natural, although I'm afraid I can't offer any advice as its not my area of expertise.
Keep fighting
sk7ine man said:
is that so unrealistic?
In time, no.I haven't been through the s
te you have but I hope my story gives you hope: 3 years post chemo... I'm still in remission (touch wood!) and I'm getting married this month to a lady who deserves more than I could ever offer. Her main flaw is that she's blind enough to marry this ugly lump! 
I wish Blearyeyedboy from 2013 could go back to 2010 Blearyeyedboy when he was scared s
tless and feeling very alone, and reassure him it was all going to turn out OK... and I wish 2016 sk7ine man could do the same for 2013 sk7ine man, if you get my drift. Hang in there, fella. Good things may well come, in time.
blearyeyedboy said:
In time, no.
I haven't been through the ste you have but I hope my story gives you hope: 3 years post chemo... I'm still in remission (touch wood!) and I'm getting married this month to a lady who deserves more than I could ever offer. Her main flaw is that she's blind enough to marry this ugly lump!
I wish Blearyeyedboy from 2013 could go back to 2010 Blearyeyedboy when he was scared stless and feeling very alone, and reassure him it was all going to turn out OK... and I wish 2016 sk7ine man could do the same for 2013 sk7ine man, if you get my drift.
Hang in there, fella. Good things may well come, in time.
Haha, good point. Hindsight can be a wonderful thing and hopefully ill be looking back on this and wondering what all the fuss was about?!I haven't been through the s
te you have but I hope my story gives you hope: 3 years post chemo... I'm still in remission (touch wood!) and I'm getting married this month to a lady who deserves more than I could ever offer. Her main flaw is that she's blind enough to marry this ugly lump! I wish Blearyeyedboy from 2013 could go back to 2010 Blearyeyedboy when he was scared s
tless and feeling very alone, and reassure him it was all going to turn out OK... and I wish 2016 sk7ine man could do the same for 2013 sk7ine man, if you get my drift. Hang in there, fella. Good things may well come, in time.
Well done for your fight, touch wood may it long remain that way. Big Congrats on the marriage front, wish you both a wonderful future together.
HOw often is she cancelling appointments due to your boy being 'ill'? Has he always been a sickly child, or is it (allegedly) happening a lot more since she left you? 
How about keeping a video diary (even if you just record short clips on your phone)? One day, you can give it to him and it might be a bit more informal/less full on to watch that, than read your written diaries.
If it's full of clips of you stood outside the contact centre saying "Mum has cancelled yet again", it will be irrefutable evidence to counter her lies and poisoning about you.
How about keeping a video diary (even if you just record short clips on your phone)? One day, you can give it to him and it might be a bit more informal/less full on to watch that, than read your written diaries.
If it's full of clips of you stood outside the contact centre saying "Mum has cancelled yet again", it will be irrefutable evidence to counter her lies and poisoning about you.
TroubledSoul said:
ofcorsa said:
I would at least keep a written diary of cancelled visits and the reason given.
Agreed. it would not be unreasonable for a caring dad to have "serious concerns" about the way his son's health has seemingly deteriorated so badly since being in his mother's sole care.WinstonWolf said:
TroubledSoul said:
ofcorsa said:
I would at least keep a written diary of cancelled visits and the reason given.
Agreed. it would not be unreasonable for a caring dad to have "serious concerns" about the way his son's health has seemingly deteriorated so badly since being in his mother's sole care.Apologies for the lack of updates, just had a busy couple of weeks with getting bits for my solicitor etc nd hospital appointments.
I just wanted to say a massive Thank You to those that helped contribute to the fund, Mobile Chicane completed the transaction yesterday to my solicitor/Mckenzie friend to help assist with the Directions Hearing, which Is on Monday. It helped alleviate a huge financial worry for me as to how I'd pay for the legal help. Thank you all again for your kindness
Equally a massive Thank You also to those that may not have contributed financially but have certainly helped share the pain with your kind words and support.
As mentioned the Directions hearing is n Monday and I'm getting nervous, don't know what the outcome is going to be, or which way the witch will swing her broom this time.fingers crossed and I will update with the outcome.
I'm due to start Radiotherapy in the next couple of weeks which I'm not looking forward to given the discomfort I'm in, which will only get worse over the course of treatment. My Macmillan nurse has been fantastic helping with my pain and symptoms. Just so want this to be over now.
I just wanted to say a massive Thank You to those that helped contribute to the fund, Mobile Chicane completed the transaction yesterday to my solicitor/Mckenzie friend to help assist with the Directions Hearing, which Is on Monday. It helped alleviate a huge financial worry for me as to how I'd pay for the legal help. Thank you all again for your kindness
Equally a massive Thank You also to those that may not have contributed financially but have certainly helped share the pain with your kind words and support.
As mentioned the Directions hearing is n Monday and I'm getting nervous, don't know what the outcome is going to be, or which way the witch will swing her broom this time.fingers crossed and I will update with the outcome.
I'm due to start Radiotherapy in the next couple of weeks which I'm not looking forward to given the discomfort I'm in, which will only get worse over the course of treatment. My Macmillan nurse has been fantastic helping with my pain and symptoms. Just so want this to be over now.
Edited by sk7ine man on Thursday 1st August 01:11
Thank you, i cant see where the finishing line is yet but there must be some road to an end!
Just been speaking to my Mckenzie friend whose quite pumped up by this. He's going to have a word with her on Monday prior to the hearing and ask her what possible reason there is now not to move this forward, out of the contact centre, to proper time at home with my son and my family who miss him dearly. If she's not going to play ball, he wants to move to getting a residency order and get cafcass involved! Happy days.
Just been speaking to my Mckenzie friend whose quite pumped up by this. He's going to have a word with her on Monday prior to the hearing and ask her what possible reason there is now not to move this forward, out of the contact centre, to proper time at home with my son and my family who miss him dearly. If she's not going to play ball, he wants to move to getting a residency order and get cafcass involved! Happy days.
Sincere apologies to all for the lack of updates. Shortly after the drama and I mean Drama of the hearing, I fell quite ill (fever) and was hospitalised for a week. Recovering together with running round collecting various documents for the parallel Financial order case has been a nightmare. Our dog also past away last week and as you may tell its been a bewildering past few weeks. I will update with what happened in the next day or two, I'm fingers are still bleeding from the typing of a witness statement I've had to submit in the contact order case!
Again, my apologies as I owe it to all of you to at the very least update whats been happening but I will, gimme a day or so
Again, my apologies as I owe it to all of you to at the very least update whats been happening but I will, gimme a day or so
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