I did something childish today.
Discussion
I don't do many pranks but I've been sitting thinking about the few I have pulled on Mrs Strangler.
On my birthday, getting on for 40 years ago, she was working and couldn't go out. She was a psychiatric nurse and once a fortnight had a 12 hour shift, which turned into about 13 hours with the paperwork and this was one of those nights. So I just went on a pub crawl on my own. At some point was crossing the road between the Red Lion and the Running Horse (Canning Circus, Nottingham for those who might remember) when I bumped into a bloke called Cannonball. He was a bit "special" but a nice fella anyway. Think "care in the community".
He said he'd been looking for me all over to give me my birthday present, which he duly handed over. It was a small but extremely hairy coconut.
I said cheers mate, had a pint with him and carried on.
By the time I got home I still had it and I was utterly trolleyed. Couldn't bite my nails. SWMBO had crawled into the bed and was snoring like a diesel so I whispered goodnight darling, grabbed a blanket and flaked out on the sofa. But before I left her I pushed the coconut into the bed. f
k knows why...
Sometime around four in the morning she turned over and put her hand on the coconut. Which I had forgotten all about.
We lived in a terrace house and the shrieks woke up two innocent families and frightened me out of five years growth.
But it was worth it
On my birthday, getting on for 40 years ago, she was working and couldn't go out. She was a psychiatric nurse and once a fortnight had a 12 hour shift, which turned into about 13 hours with the paperwork and this was one of those nights. So I just went on a pub crawl on my own. At some point was crossing the road between the Red Lion and the Running Horse (Canning Circus, Nottingham for those who might remember) when I bumped into a bloke called Cannonball. He was a bit "special" but a nice fella anyway. Think "care in the community".
He said he'd been looking for me all over to give me my birthday present, which he duly handed over. It was a small but extremely hairy coconut.
I said cheers mate, had a pint with him and carried on.
By the time I got home I still had it and I was utterly trolleyed. Couldn't bite my nails. SWMBO had crawled into the bed and was snoring like a diesel so I whispered goodnight darling, grabbed a blanket and flaked out on the sofa. But before I left her I pushed the coconut into the bed. f
k knows why... Sometime around four in the morning she turned over and put her hand on the coconut. Which I had forgotten all about.
We lived in a terrace house and the shrieks woke up two innocent families and frightened me out of five years growth.
But it was worth it
ShampooEfficient said:
CATstrangler said:
AFAIK they are still going around calling for their cats with Russian slang for T1ts and Ar5e
Given the username I'm concerned they came to you at all.
: I promise I don't really strangle cats though. I'm not crazy about them as a species but I do like individual cats and would never hurt one.It's a reference to CAT marine diesels. I've experienced two runaways that had to be strangled to stop them so it's an acquired nickname.
While I was bingeing this thread I came across numerous posts from "Mobsta". He is a fking legend - is he still around?
Anyway, here is my tribute to the master, given his fixation with chilli based tomfoolery.
I work with a bloke who shall remain nameless, called Dave. He's a tt. I'm tired of him nicking my tools and making a stty mess of my workshop.
I noticed that he goes out for a curry on Sunday nights. Monday morning is, let's say, problematic for him.
Last week I unrolled about 3 meters of the bog roll in the crapper he uses and soaked it with Ralgex spray. I didn't even know it existed until I found it in a van I rented.
Then I rewinded the bog roll. This takes a bit of patience but it's possible.
I get into work about 07:30.
He gets in about 09:30.
About 10:30 I dropped him off at the hozzie..
Mobsta you are my guru. Thank you.
king legend - is he still around? Anyway, here is my tribute to the master, given his fixation with chilli based tomfoolery.
I work with a bloke who shall remain nameless, called Dave. He's a t
t. I'm tired of him nicking my tools and making a stty mess of my workshop. I noticed that he goes out for a curry on Sunday nights. Monday morning is, let's say, problematic for him.
Last week I unrolled about 3 meters of the bog roll in the crapper he uses and soaked it with Ralgex spray. I didn't even know it existed until I found it in a van I rented.
Then I rewinded the bog roll. This takes a bit of patience but it's possible.
I get into work about 07:30.
He gets in about 09:30.
About 10:30 I dropped him off at the hozzie..
Mobsta you are my guru. Thank you.
gtidriver said:
I had one of those Casio remote watches. No tv was safe. They are better than the tv be gone as you can do the volume as well as switch on and off and change channel. I took mine to an electronics event at Earl's Court, walked through the Sony display turning lots of tvs off or the volume up.
You and some others I seem to remember.......It was some years ago - an event called 'Live' at Earls Court (late 90s) - I worked for Sony and did a few similar events. We had a stand which had taken over a week to build and the entrance walkway had a wall of TVs. The first day literally had staff with remote controls quietly putting the TVs back on the right setting, while that first night, the event team ( a very stressed Mike) had the stand-fitters back in on ladders, putting insulation tape over the sensors.....
CATstrangler said:
I just discovered this thread last night and I've been bingeing it. Laughing my socks off.
You reminded me of a woman I knew who bought two kittens, a male and a female, for her kids. They are (apparently) Russian Blue cats and for some unfathomable reason she thinks I speak Russian. (I don't, beyond a few essentials like Beer, Cigarette Lighter, How much? etc).
So she asked me about Russian names for the kitties. Something nice. So I called her back a couple of hours later and said how about Siska for the girl cat and Popka for the boy?
AFAIK they are still going around calling for their cats with Russian slang for T1ts and Ar5e
At my previous house we had a bunch of young men renting next door. Life was seldom dull. They had a small terrier type dog, but none of them wanted to take charge of it when they had to vacate on the owners' return to the UK. Another neighbour, Janet, volunteered to take the dog.You reminded me of a woman I knew who bought two kittens, a male and a female, for her kids. They are (apparently) Russian Blue cats and for some unfathomable reason she thinks I speak Russian. (I don't, beyond a few essentials like Beer, Cigarette Lighter, How much? etc).
So she asked me about Russian names for the kitties. Something nice. So I called her back a couple of hours later and said how about Siska for the girl cat and Popka for the boy?
AFAIK they are still going around calling for their cats with Russian slang for T1ts and Ar5e
Edited by CATstrangler on Sunday 15th March 15:19
When she asked them the dog's name, they told her "Spliff".
Now, Janet was a pretty straight up sort of a lady, and didn't have a clue. Everyone else up and down the road were debating at what point she would have to be made aware. Decision time came, however, when the dog got through Janet's front garden gate, and we found her out front, desperately shouting out "Spliff" up and down the road.
She kept the dog many years, but never changed the name. I am not convinced she ever really understood, even when we did try to explain.
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