My grandad died tonight.

[Dalto123]

Sorry to hear this. Sadly lost my grandfather (mothers side) 6 years ago and it did hit hard (first family death). But time really is a healer and now when I think of him it's the happy times I remember, not the sad

Unfortunately, my grandfather (fathers side) has been taken to hospital tonight having had some quite serious health scares in recent months. Worried is an understatement

[chrisxr2]

Ok, my grandad was more if a dad than my dad was, sorry for your loss, as for coping, we just do somehow, had a conversation about heroes with the missus of the back of a tv show the other day, no hesitation my grandad was my hero, thinking of him even ten years after his passing makes me smile and also well up with tears for still missing him.

[DSLiverpool]

One thing to think about is the eulogy, if he was your stand in dad don't miss this chance to speak at his funeral. I bottled it at my brothers and regret it every day, when my mum died earlier this year I dam well made sure I did her proud - and I did.

[Lunablack]

Butter Face said:

I've never felt so empty in my life

I'm truly truly gutted, my dad left when I was 6 months old, my grandad was my 'dad' and taught me about cars, women, right and wrong.

Any ideas on how to cope for the next few days would be appreciated, especially the funeral

Same as you.... My grandad was my DAD, in that he took me in at 6 months old and made sure I stayed on the straight and narrow... It's 10 years since he passed away, and not a day goes by that I don't think of something he said or did, that makes me smile......... He was and still is the kindest, gentlest wisest man I've ever known

For me, his funeral was a celebration of his life, and I thought of all the great things we did together... I just smiled and never even shed a tear.....everyone else was dressed in black, and doing the usual somber stuff that goes on at funerals..... I was in my scruffiness t shirt and oily jeans...... Because that's the way he always saw me..... He'd have laughed his head off if I'd worn a tie...

So my advice, is don't dwell on his passing..... Remember all the good times, and smile..

[eldar]

This is PH at its best. Good, sensible and practical advice from people with a common experience. You aren't alone.

[Mobsta]

Sorry to hear this.

Remember the good times, to carry you through the bad times.
Take time to ride the happy waves of good memories in the future.
Rip

[Butter Face]

The help on here has been brilliant, I'm really thankful for the messages of support.

My grab gave me gramps' St Christopher chain last night, she gave it to him for their wedding anniversary many many years ago (she can't even remember when) and he's worn it every day since. It's jn every picture of him and now it's around my neck where it will be for the rest of my life

The wife and I are off to pick up our new puppy and he will be called Billy (my grandads name was Bill) which will give everyone a laugh I'm sure.

Thanks again for the messages of support.

[HertsBiker]

Best wishes mate. I found it best to not hide away, dwelling on my losses, keep up my work routine. It would have been easy to become an angry recluse at times, but just doing the usual stuff kept my mind from it. As soon as I took time off it seemed worse. And avoid getting totally plastered. It only helps very short term but can cause long term problems. Helping the other survivors is also one of the best things and everyone benefits. Take care.

[MikeHull]

My condolences to you and your family. Its a cliché but time is a great healer.

[Butter Face]

Thanks for the kind words

Funeral director rang today but no news fr the hospital as yet.

Gramps had a small bit of life insurance and grandma rang them today to be told that a company called 'Dignity' had 'first call' on the policy, quick phone call to them reveals that gramps had spoken to them a few months ago to start arranging funeral things always trying to be one bloody step ahead.

Quick explanation to them that we want to use a local funeral director (family friend) and they said no worries, just need to put it in writing. Phew! Gramps was just trying to help I suppose!

Bits like pension etc sorted, grandma will get some money, but not a lot so we'll just have to see what happens!

Hard work all this stuff!!

[Chunkymonkey71]

I havent really said anythng here because I'm not sure what to say.

I do feel st for you though. You have my condolences.

[Asterix]

Sorry to hear this mate - my condolences for your loss.

[Adenauer]

Condolences from over here too, BF.

[DavesFlaps]

Firstly, OP, my condolencies.

Reading through the previous posts, it's apparent people deal with grief in very different ways but the message that's common throughout the thread is that the passing of time eases the pain.

My Dad died last week after a long illness and although I had convinced myself I was prepared for his passing, it hit me like a train. I've managed to keep myself busy organising things (the amount of stuff that needs to be addressed is incredible) and looking after my Mum, and I'm lucky to have the support of an incredible wife. I've been asked to say a few words at the funeral which I expect will be one of the most difficult things I'll ever have to do, but I'm determined to do it, for him.

[Butter Face]

DavesFlaps said:

Firstly, OP, my condolencies.

Reading through the previous posts, it's apparent people deal with grief in very different ways but the message that's common throughout the thread is that the passing of time eases the pain.

My Dad died last week after a long illness and although I had convinced myself I was prepared for his passing, it hit me like a train. I've managed to keep myself busy organising things (the amount of stuff that needs to be addressed is incredible) and looking after my Mum, and I'm lucky to have the support of an incredible wife. I've been asked to say a few words at the funeral which I expect will be one of the most difficult things I'll ever have to do, but I'm determined to do it, for him.

Sorry to hear of your loss, it's not easy but I think you're doing it the same way as me

Just been talking to a chap in work who does tattoos, I've never thought about tattoos before but I partially think it would be a nice way to remember him. Grandma never let him have tattoos.

[Murray993]

Sorry for your loss. Remember to try and rejoice in the fact you had such a instrumental person in your life, he obviously loved you a great deal.

[Butter Face]

Yes I'm sure he did.

We only started saying it over the last few years so I hope he knew that I cared a lot for him

[R1gtr]

Very sorry to hear of your loss, I lost my father at 18, it can be very hard and keeping busy helps, it will hit you when you least expect it.
Every time I got upset or a bit down I imagined what he would say if he was looking down, 'cheer up and stop being so bloody miserable, go have some fun' or something along those lines.
Don't feel guilty for having a laugh and a joke, imagine you yourself had passed, you wouldn't want your friends and family being sad and miserable.
Start a new hobby, something you always fancied, do it as a tribute.
Best wishes

[Butter Face]

R1gtr said:

Start a new hobby, something you always fancied, do it as a tribute.

What a great idea

My granddad loved watches, he's got quite a collection (nothing expensive but some cool stuff) so I could carry on with that, He'd love it if I did that.

Thanks for that, it's just made me smile for the first time in a few days

[R1gtr]

Butter Face said:

Thanks for that, it's just made me smile for the first time in a few days

No problem mate, watches would be a great idea, give you something to pass on to your kids/grandkids too.
You could also take up mountain biking or something you always thought about, now is the time, the loss of a loved one shows that we have to follow our dreams and live our lives to the max.
How about a motorbike?