Pistonheaders and their First World Problems.
Discussion
I was in Tesco last night (shopping myself in such a commoner supermarket- I know!) and wanted salmon for dinner but also wanted a bottle of red wine. The two clearly don't go (obviously champagne for salmon), so rather than switch I thought I would live with it. Even the checkout assistant judged me.
THX said:
I went to (admittedly, a down market retailer) Richer Sounds to buy two subwoofers for my needlessly over powered 11.2 a/v receiver, but they only had one in stock!
I feel your pain! Went to get iPhones for Christmas presents,shop only had 2 in stock...I have to go to a different branches now.
Utterly furious.
I feel your pain! Went to get iPhones for Christmas presents,shop only had 2 in stock...I have to go to a different branches now.
Utterly furious.
First of all I would like to apologies for the length of this missive, however, when you read of the abject misery I have been forced to endure I am sure you will understand, indeed you may have found yourself in a similar position, what with us almost living on top of each other on our crowded Isle.
My problem is this: pollution, namely noise pollution from neighbours. With the glorious 12th here, my next door neighbour, whose estate borders my own some 18 miles to the South West, has taken to holding shooting parties on his grouse moor and unfortunately, when the wind is in the wrong direction I can clearly hear the shooting whilst on the Summer terrace, forcing me to retreat to the winter terrace where it can get quite chilly as you can imagine. Now I will admit the report of a finely honed Purdey or Holland & Holland can be a balm to the ears, but over time it can become wearisome.
I had almost resigned myself to this purgatory when a member of staff grunted they had had some noise issues at there own brick built testament to squalor and poverty and they had contacted an organization called the 'Council' who apparently can help in these situations. So, telephone calls were placed and I was informed some low level functionary would arrive, with myself bemoaning all along the fact that things have come to such a head that I now have to share problems with my own staff.
So the day arrived: well, where to begin dear reader? First of all the chap drives up to front of my property, when there is perfectly good tradesman's entrance, secondly I was greeted with a familiarity bordering on the presumptuous, 'Alright mate? I'm Kev, environmental services, nice gaff you got 'ere' (sic) and thirdly, I kid you not, the chap was wearing an ear ring. Yes it's true! Reminded me of a chap from my India days, strange cove, suffice to say the chaps and I thought him a Bengal short of a Lancer.
Now normally in this situation I would have had him thrown off the grounds, but as I felt he may be in a position to help me, I thought I should try to make an effort, so proceeded to engage 'my mate Kev' in small talk, (not something I find easy with my social inferiors). But to no avail: my inquiry as to whether he rode to hounds was greeted with little more than a blank stare, and worse, when I described the living hell I am being forced to endure he accused me of wasting the 'Council's' time
and also, I'm sure he called me 'a mad old c**t' under his breath.
So as I stood on my portico, watching 'Kev' depart in his odious little Kangoo van laying waste to my freshly raked drive( the gravel of which, I've had Simister individually cleaning for the last two months) I lamented the sad state of affairs I have succumbed to and what I have possibly done to deserve it. I only hope and pray dear reader you don't find yourself having to deal with the 'Council', I truly do.
My problem is this: pollution, namely noise pollution from neighbours. With the glorious 12th here, my next door neighbour, whose estate borders my own some 18 miles to the South West, has taken to holding shooting parties on his grouse moor and unfortunately, when the wind is in the wrong direction I can clearly hear the shooting whilst on the Summer terrace, forcing me to retreat to the winter terrace where it can get quite chilly as you can imagine. Now I will admit the report of a finely honed Purdey or Holland & Holland can be a balm to the ears, but over time it can become wearisome.
I had almost resigned myself to this purgatory when a member of staff grunted they had had some noise issues at there own brick built testament to squalor and poverty and they had contacted an organization called the 'Council' who apparently can help in these situations. So, telephone calls were placed and I was informed some low level functionary would arrive, with myself bemoaning all along the fact that things have come to such a head that I now have to share problems with my own staff.
So the day arrived: well, where to begin dear reader? First of all the chap drives up to front of my property, when there is perfectly good tradesman's entrance, secondly I was greeted with a familiarity bordering on the presumptuous, 'Alright mate? I'm Kev, environmental services, nice gaff you got 'ere' (sic) and thirdly, I kid you not, the chap was wearing an ear ring. Yes it's true! Reminded me of a chap from my India days, strange cove, suffice to say the chaps and I thought him a Bengal short of a Lancer.
Now normally in this situation I would have had him thrown off the grounds, but as I felt he may be in a position to help me, I thought I should try to make an effort, so proceeded to engage 'my mate Kev' in small talk, (not something I find easy with my social inferiors). But to no avail: my inquiry as to whether he rode to hounds was greeted with little more than a blank stare, and worse, when I described the living hell I am being forced to endure he accused me of wasting the 'Council's' time
and also, I'm sure he called me 'a mad old c**t' under his breath.
So as I stood on my portico, watching 'Kev' depart in his odious little Kangoo van laying waste to my freshly raked drive( the gravel of which, I've had Simister individually cleaning for the last two months) I lamented the sad state of affairs I have succumbed to and what I have possibly done to deserve it. I only hope and pray dear reader you don't find yourself having to deal with the 'Council', I truly do.
sc0tt said:
Fastdruid said:
After a piss-poor job on a re-spray the garage are having the car back in to rectify. I've just learnt that the courtesy car will be a Nissan Micra.
A F**king Nissan Micra.
I mean that's against Article 3 of the European Convention on Human rights.
FML.
Point missed.A F**king Nissan Micra.
I mean that's against Article 3 of the European Convention on Human rights.
FML.
Maybe I should sue.
I'm convinced I now have PTSD. Months of therapy no doubt await.
After a super evening at the Pig on the Beach, trying to get home we find the Sandbanks ferry has been suspended, due to Café Shore being on fire. The very same venue where Ms CFXII and I were to have a quick sundowner on the way home. Due to the flames, we have a 25 mile detour to get home and had to resort to said swifty in the summer house instead. Don't even start how the new anti roll bar bushes on the Murcielago have not stopped the knock from the rear, that's for another night, my hypertension is flaring up again. I now find the TV in the summer house is reporting no signal. In order to dull the pain, I've cracked open the prize bottle of Peppy Van Winkle. Super, disaster not averted however as what are the children to watch as they get out of the pool in the morning ? The early morning dip is not complete without Peppa Pig in HD on CBeebies in the summer house. Are the cherubs to be expected to drag their chlorine smelling forms into the main house ?! What to do. What's the best number for the Samaritans ? Or at least Samsung support ?! FML.
After a super evening at the Pig on the Beach, trying to get home we find the Sandbanks ferry has been suspended, due to Café Shore being on fire. The very same venue where Ms CFXII and I were to have a quick sundowner on the way home. Due to the flames, we have a 25 mile detour to get home and had to resort to said swifty in the summer house instead. Don't even start how the new anti roll bar bushes on the Murcielago have not stopped the knock from the rear, that's for another night, my hypertension is flaring up again. I now find the TV in the summer house is reporting no signal. In order to dull the pain, I've cracked open the prize bottle of Peppy Van Winkle. Super, disaster not averted however as what are the children to watch as they get out of the pool in the morning ? The early morning dip is not complete without Peppa Pig in HD on CBeebies in the summer house. Are the cherubs to be expected to drag their chlorine smelling forms into the main house ?! What to do. What's the best number for the Samaritans ? Or at least Samsung support ?! FML.
I have two iphone 4s's. One business. One personal.
Personal contract has expired leaving with me 5-6 or so weeks to wait until iphone 6 is launched.
Business contract continues for another 12 months leaving me with a phone still requiring the old style cables like some sort of peasant. And that's not to mention the two differently sized devices in my pocket.
Personal contract has expired leaving with me 5-6 or so weeks to wait until iphone 6 is launched.
Business contract continues for another 12 months leaving me with a phone still requiring the old style cables like some sort of peasant. And that's not to mention the two differently sized devices in my pocket.
Rich A said:
I have two iphone 4s's. One business. One personal.
Personal contract has expired leaving with me 5-6 or so weeks to wait until iphone 6 is launched.
Business contract continues for another 12 months leaving me with a phone still requiring the old style cables like some sort of peasant. And that's not to mention the two differently sized devices in my pocket.
I post on a website that seems to let drug dealers join. Personal contract has expired leaving with me 5-6 or so weeks to wait until iphone 6 is launched.
Business contract continues for another 12 months leaving me with a phone still requiring the old style cables like some sort of peasant. And that's not to mention the two differently sized devices in my pocket.
STW2010 said:
I was in Tesco last night (shopping myself in such a commoner supermarket- I know!) and wanted salmon for dinner but also wanted a bottle of red wine. The two clearly don't go (obviously champagne for salmon), so rather than switch I thought I would live with it. Even the checkout assistant judged me.
Are you sure they weren't judging you for shopping in Tesco instead of Waitrose? I know I am.Tallow said:
STW2010 said:
I was in Tesco last night (shopping myself in such a commoner supermarket- I know!) and wanted salmon for dinner but also wanted a bottle of red wine. The two clearly don't go (obviously champagne for salmon), so rather than switch I thought I would live with it. Even the checkout assistant judged me.
Are you sure they weren't judging you for shopping in Tesco instead of Waitrose? I know I am.Please don't hate me
STW2010 said:
It was even worse when I was asked if I had a Clubcard. Much to my embarrassment the answer was 'yes'.
Please don't hate me
Don't worry, you can make up for this infraction by paying for your next Waitrose cup of coffee whilst displaying your myWaitrose card just to prove the point...Please don't hate me
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